It’s summer, which means it’s time to primp, pluck, prod and poke your bod into beachwear condition. In the spirit of the season, e-commerce company Alibaba Group put together this slideshow of decidedly unusual beauty products you’ll find on Chinese shopping website Taobao Marketplace and online wholesale site Alibaba.com. *Please note, Alibaba Group does not endorse the products shown in the following slideshow nor does it vouch for their validity, claims or sellers.

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It’s summer, which means it’s time to primp, pluck, prod and poke your bod into
beachwear condition. In the spirit of the season, e-commerce company Alibaba
Group put together this slideshow of decidedly unusual beauty products you’ll
find on Chinese shopping website Taobao Marketplace and online wholesale
site Alibaba.com.
Please note, Alibaba Group does not endorse the products shown in the following slideshow nor does it vouch for their validity, claims or sellers.

2. Who Needs Rhinoplasty?
The makers of the Electric High Nose Beauty Lift claim this scary looking device
can give you a “firmer and higher nose” in just three minutes, lending fresh
meaning to the phrase “her nose is out of joint.”

3. She’s Got Bette Davis Eyelids
Here’s a beauty aid aimed at Asian women who want that bug-eyed, double-eyelid
Western look. Like the nose clamp in the previous slide, it appears this spectacles-
like contraption only works when you are wearing it, which is bound to detract from
the desired effect (even though it comes in pretty pink).
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4. Put A Spring In Your Step
Or, at least, remove unwanted facial hair with this spring hair remover. Judging
from the pictures, shaving was apparently the only alternative to this springy gizmo.
Men and women who wax, tweeze, bleach, dissolve or laser might have something
to say about that.
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5. Hot Steamy Summer Nights
These portable steam saunas claim to help users lose weight, tighten skin and
improve circulation. If the summer isn’t hot or steamy enough for you, you could
just pull this contraption out.

6. Luke, I Am Your Father!
This as-seen-on-TV (no really, it was!) LED face mask promises to improve
problematic skin, lighten freckles and even out skin tones. We’re hoping it comes
with a matching lightsaber.
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7. Sharpen Those Claws
This summer, print out your own artistic creations with this digital nail art printer for
unique patterns on every finger. According to its manufacturers, it can print on
“mobile phones, wooden combs, eggs or small mirrors,” too. It’s the ultimate
accessory, really.

8. Meso-What?
Mesotherapy is popular amongst Hollywood stars and believed to be the quick fix
to reducing fat cells through various cosmetic injections. This particular portable
photo rejuvenation mesotherapy kit offers a needle-free alternative for those of you
who may be a bit squeamish, and who just like the good vibrations.

9. Super Magnetism
Your gym membership may just have became obsolete with these magnetic toe
rings for weight loss. Wear these on your toes to flush your fatty acids “through the
system rather than being deposited.” It’s as if these silicon and magnets have
super powers.

10. Cavewoman Legs Are H-O-T This Summer
Actually, these hirsute leggings are meant to be worn as a groper deterrent in
Asia’s crowded subway systems. We’ve included them as beachwear for gals who
are allergic to sunblock, because nothing stops ol’ sol’s rays like a thick, lustrous
coat of leg hair. Stops unwanted advances, too.
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11. Beachwear At Its Finest
The Face-kini has gotten plenty of press as a favorite among men and women who
prefer a paler aesthetic. In countries where the sun-kissed look is unsightly, people
are donning this spandex/lycra mask to shield their skin from damaging UV rays
and it doubles as a way to conceal their identity when robbing a bank.
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12. Enjoy the summer!