2. CHILDREN AND Parenting:
when kids are part of the package.
Even before marriage, 86% of couples believe that children would put an additional
STRAIN on their marriage– They are Right
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3. CHILDREN AND Parenting:
If children have priority over marriage, problems will increase.
Kids will have more power in the home than the stepparent
This creates resentment, jealousy, hurt anger and competition between the child and
the stepparent
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4. Making the marriage a PRIORITY RELATIONSHIP, then, invites the children to gain
respect for stepparents and IT EMPOWERS the stepparent to actually care for the
children in loving and sacrificial ways, due to a lack of competition
This is contrary to popular wisdom. It challenges the unhealthy emotions and
attitudes of single parents who are unhealthily attached to their children!
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5. We shouldn't neglect our children to focus all the attention on our spouse, at the
expense of the children.
Bottom Line: When push comes to shove, we must make it clear to our children that
our marriage will last ABOVE ALL ELSE
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6. Children often feel threatened when your marriage is strengthened: They feel a sense
of loss and often failure, as their dream of Parental Reconciliation is diminished.
Even with the child' fear, insecurity and anxiety, about the new stepfamily, a Parent's
declaration and demonstrated commitment to their marriage is the foundation of the
home.
It is the first step toward marital INTIMACY Stepfamily harmony, and effective
parenting
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7. “It was when our 5 children came to believe and accept that our marriage wasn’t
going away that our stepfamily turned the corner to Peace and harmony.”
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8. REMEMBER? This is based on research with 50,000 people experienced in step family
situations
Condoning childish immaturity is hurting the child and both parents:
1. Your partner, the stepparent will eventually leave, lonely and bitter.
2. The child will grow up without the ability to form satisfying adult relationships and
enter fulfilling marriage
Finally, the most depressing fact!
3. The biological parent will be lonely in their old age: After studying children of
divorce for 25 years, Psychiatrist Judith Wallerstein observed that children of single
and divorced parents rarely visit their aged parents in convalescent homes.
HOLD ON TO YOUR MARRIAGE!
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