1. GETTING COMFORTABLE CHARGING MORE:
Overcoming "Head Trash" That Holds Most Coaches Back!
An Interview with Howie Jacobson, Ph.D. and Glenn Livingston, Ph.D.
(This is a Transcript of a Free Full Length Audio Available for Download Below)
http://www.coachcertificationacademy.com/SendToHowie1.htm?n=1
Glenn Livingston's companies have sold over $20,000,000 in
consulting and/or coaching services. Glenn has worked with over
1,000 coaching clients and directly supervised many coaches and
psychotherapists, and his company's work and theories have
appeared in dozens of major media.
Dr. Howie Jacobson earned his bachelor's degree from Princeton
University and his Ph.D. in Education from Temple University.
After working as a school teacher for several years, Howie
decided to develop educational programs for the business world,
and specializes in creating simple, easy to understand methods
for teaching complex concepts. He's the author of AdWords for
Dummies (Wiley Publishing), and has co-authored a book "Whole"
with T. Colin Campbell (author of "The China Study" - the world's
largest epidemiological study on nutrition and disease). Dr.
Jacobson has also developed his own online marketing agency,
traveled the world presenting his ideas, work, and theories, and
maintains a small, high priced coaching practice from his home
office in North Carolina.
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2. Glenn: Hey, this is Dr. Glenn Livingston. I’m here with one of my good friends,
Howie Jacobson. How are you, Howie?
Howie: Wonderful, Glenn. How about you?
Glenn: Are you really wonderful?
Howie: I really am wonderful.
Glenn: I heard that about you.
Howie: I would not bullshit your listeners.
Glenn: Thank you.
Howie: We'll do another call and I tell you I’m crappy and then tell, “No, I’m
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telling the truth now."
Glenn: You got a lot of people calling you to see if you need a free coaching
session after that. The reason I wanted to talk to Howie today was
because Howie is someone who has done a lot of soul searching, kind
of spending a lot of time crafting the life that he wants. He does a good
deal of mostly business coaching, right, Howie, on the coaching side?
Howie: Yeah. It all starts as business. Let’s put it that way.
Glenn: That’s an interesting comment in and of itself. There's almost no type of
coaching that doesn’t become personal coaching on some level, right?
Howie: Right. We are the limiting factor. The things that are limiting factors, it
could be, you know, our business model, our mental health, our
emotional health, our spiritual health, our physical health. Part of the
job of the coach is to kind of figure out where there's a good inflection
point.
I have clients for whom they want to talk about marketing. The
conversation naturally moves to what did you eat for breakfast because
that’s actually more important.
Glenn: Because the reason they're not succeeding in their business because
they're not feeding their body correctly. It’s difficult to think when you
don’t feed your body correctly, right?
[0:01:14.7]
3. Howie: Yes. Like coaching someone to win a NASCAR race and there's no fuel
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in their tank.
Glenn: Right.
Howie: You can spend all the time you want watching the videos of your
competitors but get some fuel in your tank.
Glenn: There you go. Howie is also the author of couple of well-known books,
AdWords for Dummies and actually a book that's about to come out
which is called Whole , co-author is T. Colin Campbell from The China
Study. Howie, I find that very impressive. I don’t know if you find that
very impressive, but I find it impressive.
Howie: I still find it impressive.
Glenn: Good.
Howie: I used to find the AdWords book impressive and then I didn’t anymore
but I’m still at the -- pinch myself that I got to write a book with Colin
Campbell.
Glenn: Yeah. You definitely deserve it. You definitely deserve it. It is
impressive. You should.
What I really wanted to ask you about today was, there was a time
when you really weren’t comfortable taking money for coaching, there
was a time when you hadn’t had any coaching clients, when maybe you
had a bunch of insecurities and ambivalences about what it might be
like to coach professionally. I wonder if you can kind of take me back to
the time, talk a little bit about those insecurities. Then we can take the
journey together and understand what your first client experiences were
like and how you got over some of these insecurities. Would that be
okay?
Howie: Sure. Sure. Sure. I can think of very specific structural issues that
gotten my way at first. One of them I think is probably comments of
most people which is that we end up being drawn to helping other
people with our own problems. If I want to be a communications coach,
it’s because that’s where I struggle regardless of the time and
experience that I’ve had getting good at it that it’s kind of an inherent
area of weakness. I became a marketing coach because I found
marketing so painful when I was starting out that I had to sort of learn a
whole bunch of stuff to overcome it so that what comes easily to us
tends to be stuff we don’t coach on because we don’t think it’s a such a
big deal. If we can do it, we assumed everyone can do it.
[0:03:02.4]
4. It’s the stuff that we struggle with that we end up learning well enough to
help others. Yet structurally, the fact that we struggle at it, at least for
me, meant that I had a lot of doubts of whether I really could help
anyone else.
Glenn: Right. I guess another way of saying that is that if you put yourself in
the position of being the person responsible for teaching something,
there's almost no better way to master a topic than to be forced to teach
it. There's also almost no better way to give yourself a heart attack.
Howie: None of us is perfect with the exception of Sharon, if she's listening to
this but there are still areas where I struggle. There's a feeling that can
come up for me of like sometimes I’m coaching to the book like it’s not
my stuff, it’s not really fully in me on a cellular level but here's a book
that has a technique that I know that they could benefit from so I’m
going to teach them that. Sometimes, it feels like it’s an out of body
experience. I really don’t have the right. Something like that, that used
to come up a lot for me, that I’d be sharing some really, really useful
technique that I’d read. Maybe I wasn’t doing it fully myself or I wasn’t
doing it at all but I’m a teacher so I could teach them that. Then I'd feel
like, “Oh, God. I’m such a fraud. It’s not even my own thing.”
Glenn: How did you evolve from there?
Howie: One thing that was very helpful was realizing that not everybody reads
the books I read. There's a certain value to the fact that I devour books.
It’s like the librarian didn’t write any of the books but a good librarian
can get you the right book. I started to see that there is value in just
that, in being able to point. I was listening to a really interesting
interview with a guy whose name I can't remember who’s a poet
laureate of something or other. He was talking about that plagiarism is
the new art, that being able to point to things is more important than
creating things. He pointed out like Boing Boing blog because all they
do is point at interesting things. Boing Boing is arguably more
significant than any of the things they point at. We live in a world in
which curation is at least as important as content creation because
there's so much stuff out there.
Glenn: Remember the old Abraham Lincoln quote about that?
Howie: No.
Glenn: Abraham Lincoln said that it was not necessary to be an inventor of
ideas. It was enough to be a retailer of ideas. He actually considered
himself more of a retailer of ideas than an inventor of ideas.
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[0:05:20.0]
5. Howie: Huh, I like that.
Glenn: Well, I didn’t invent that. I'm just relating it. So you began to realize that
there was a value in pointing being a retailer of ideas?
Howie: Well, not just a retailer but a tailor of ideas, that I was good at seeing
where someone else had solved the problem that that story could be
beneficial. Before I got into business, one of the things I did to make a
living was storytelling, some folktales, traditional stories but I also was
writing a lot of my own and telling stories. I discovered that stories well-told
have a huge potential for healing. I can’t really explain it. There's
people who've written about it in very deep ways but I do know that
telling the right story to the right person can make them feel relief, can
make them feel hope, can make them feel energy. Who cares where
the story came from? I've been reading a lot of weird stuff lately. I was
reading about someone who does channeling, you know, channeling
spirit, disembodied spirit voices. They're basically saying that
everybody channels, like that’s all we are. You may think that you're
original. No one ever chose an idea. They either come to us or they
don’t know. Then we're all basically channels for spirit of some kind.
That was other thing, it was realizing what was and what wasn’t my
responsibility as a coach. I felt like I had to be brilliant. Like every
minute, I had to be totally brilliant. The truth is all I had to be was
present.
Glenn: Right.
Howie: That was actually harder than being brilliant. I find it rather easy to sort
of dazzle people with my erudition. I find it very hard to not check my
email when they're talking to me.
Glenn: I think that’s a good point because there are a lot of feelings that come
up when you put yourself in a position of creating an environment. It’s
called a holding environment where you make it possible for a short
period of time for people to be completely safe to say whatever they
needed to say in words, to feel whatever they needed to feel. The
reason that can become very difficult to be present for is because you're
going to have those feelings along with them. Feelings are kind of
contagious. All the reasons that they've been screwing up their life by
hiding from those feelings and thoughts that they don’t really want to
have, when you create that environment and make it possible for them
to have them, you're going to feel it also. You're going to want to get
away from it just like them.
It's actually part of what I think is one of the hardest and also most
significantly influential parts of coaching because most people in their
lives
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6. 6
[0:07:40.8]
respond with the same reflexive fear or compulsive talking or some type
of behavioral emphasis and they can’t allow themselves to just be
present. When you can teach yourself to do that for someone, you
become different than everybody else in their life. You become an
experience that they can’t get anywhere else.
It’s incredibly powerful and also in some ways incredibly difficult which
is why I always say you know, one of my competitors talk about, “Well,
in coaching, you don’t have to have answers, you just have to have the
questions." Well, yeah, that’s true. You don’t have to have answers.
You don’t have to perform. But it’s not really accurate to say you just
have to have the questions. You have to have the presence of being
and the fortitude to see that through so that they can sit with their
reactions to those questions and think new thoughts and come to new
solutions that they’d never would have come to without that thinking
intervention. I think what you're kind of casually describing is really a
very deep and profound journey that every coach needs to take. I’d be
curious to know more about how that evolved for you.
Howie: I’m really a little breathless with the way you just described it because
so many things are just falling into place for me. I really appreciate the
articulation you just gave. When you started talking, I pulled up a book
from my shelf called Flawless Consulting by Peter Block. The main
thing I remember from this long book which I read many years ago and
somehow it has escaped all my purges is that your body is your only
instrument as a coach, as a consultant, as anything. So that the ability
to feel those feelings with people and not have to push them away or
get distracted or talk over them actually those feelings that come up in
us when we get to know them and become sensitive to them are
actually our best guides towards what’s going in our client because we
are resonating with whatever is up for them.
I find myself getting anxious to that something, I used to dismiss it; now,
I speak it. I’m feeling some anxiety around this how is it for you or I’m
really curious about this. I’m not using my cognitive clever brain to
solve their problems. I’m using a type of empathy that trusts my own
body, my own intuition as a compass. I guess when you say, “What’s
my journey to that?”, it’s been doing a hell of a lot of personal work to be
able to sit with unpleasant feelings is not something that came naturally
to me. I don’t know too many people to whom it does but to do the kind
of work where I was forced to face situations, criticisms, relational
difficulties and not die.
Glenn: [Inaudible][0:10:11]
7. Howie: My assumption is I will do anything to avoid that type of conversation
because if I have it, I will be annihilated. I cannot survive that. As
ridiculous as it sounds, that was my working philosophy for years and
years. I think
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[0:10:25.7]
the ability to coach is really the ability to realize that feelings aren’t
going to kill you.
Glenn: Right. I’m really interested in talking about the rewards of that and why
do you still find it valuable to coach. I think you’re actually going deeper
into coaching. I just wanted to mention something. This is a little bit
more about the deep psychology of coaching. Sometimes, my coaching
student say, “Well, I’m not a psychologist. I don’t really need to know
about that.” That’s almost like saying, “Well, I’m not a psychologist. I
don’t really need to know about thinking or how people behave or
anything like that.” You're never going to be responsible for treating the
people. You’re going to be responsible for diagnosing, curing, anything
like that. We’re not going to get into that. But it’s good that you know
something about what Howie just said because those feelings like - if
we talked about this, “I’m not going to survive”, those are the deepest
most troublesome feelings that people have. At core, the feeling that if
we talk about this, “I’m not going to survive”, that’s what causes people
to make a mess out of their life. That’s what causes them to race into
action. It’s why you see smart people doing stupid things. It’s because
there's something that they feel like if they talked about it, they won’t
survive. In coaching, if you can give the experience of making it
possible to talk about it, well, they’ll know that not only do they survive
but they thrive. Maybe that's a good transition, Howie to talk about
some clients that you had success with or that you were particularly
satisfied in working with.
Howie: I realized how little I talked about this actually. It sort of an invitation to
market and I’m coming up a little blank. I’m trying to think of what are
the aspects of the relationship or the outcomes that are just amazing.
Glenn: Who was the first client that you had? Don’t give me their names or the
identifying details of course. But who was the first client that you had
that you felt like you did a good job with?
Howie: That’s kind of a curve. There's people -- like I started feeling like I was
earning my money, I didn’t feel bad about taking their money which I
guess was an early sign of some success. Here’s a group that I found
that as I grew into myself that I was very helpful with was entrepreneurs
who had started a business were simply just not taking the time to be
fully themselves. They were like always the on switch. As a result to
that, they just didn’t have the ability to see the big picture. Very often,
8. the big picture wasn’t even that big. This became a really powerful
question for me when people were in circumstances that they felt
trapped in but I could see clearly that they had created and that they
could change. I’d say, if you had to start over, would you hire the same
person, for example. If you had to
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[0:12:49.2]
start over, would you create this product line? If you had to start over,
whatever the thing was.
The power of that question was that it reminded them that they always
do have the power to start all over. We tend to get over invested in
what we’ve already invested in. I would say the main thing is giving
people a perspective of freedom that their space in which things can
happen, space open for possibility. That’s true, a freedom from the
agony of these feelings that we're running from. One thing I often do is
be very transparent and very open in my vulnerability. When people
see someone that vulnerable, they can put their own defenses down for
a bit. Freedom in terms of, we really are responsible, we are creators of
our experience. I don’t know if that's universally true with everyone but
it’s true with the people that I coach.
Glenn: I think it's universally true that people have astoundingly more ability to
become the masters of their own destiny than they would like to believe
that they have on a day-to-day basis. Going through some of the
experiences we talked about today where you create the holding
environment and you learn how to be present despite the feelings you
might have, that’s part of what frees people up to recognize that there
are limitations you self impose. I think that’s very relevant and very
universal in my opinion.
Howie: I started out coaching people just on growing their business. I was like
the marketing coach. It quickly became apparent to me that I could give
them lots of good ideas about their marketing but they weren’t going to
do them or they weren’t doing them. I started getting curious about
what was getting in the way because we were having the same
conversations every week. “Oh, yeah, yeah, I got to do this.” “You
know, I didn’t really understand how to write that.” “Yeah, I heard your
words. I listened to the recording but I still couldn’t get my head around
it.” It was all about various self-imposed limitations. “I’m not a writer.”
“I had a bad experience in tenth grade.” In that case, you have to show
people that they are articulate. Where in your life have you done this
already? If it’s a time management issue, we need to be able to help
them at least see. I’m a big believer in just a few different philosophies.
One of my favorite is appreciative inquiry where we don’t figure out how
to fix what’s wrong by focusing on what’s wrong, we figure out how to fix
what’s wrong by focusing on what’s right and modeling it. If you’re
looking at what’s wrong, you’re just moving away. You can move away
9. in 360 degrees but you can only move to the right, to the correct, in one
direction.
Glenn: You're reminding as we're closing of one of the best definitions of art
that I ever heard which is, "Life as it could or should be". Then when I
heard that, I kind of instantly drew a line in my head between a lot of
things that masquerade in the name of art like dousing a cross at a jar
of urine or
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[0:15:27.9]
something like that. That expression, I don’t know that it really does
anything positive for the world. I think that our focus in coaching is
really on life as it could or should be. That’s what you’re describing with
the concept of appreciative inquiry is, “Okay, let’s focus on what could
or should be and less on everything that’s wrong.”
Howie: Yeah. I hadn't really connected those dots either but I view my clients
as artists, view all of us as artists. My spiritual take on the world is that
we're all here for a reason. We all have gifts and woe to us who doesn’t
express our gifts. It'll kill us and it'll impoverish the world. Partly,
entrepreneur starts out trying to build the cathedral. Then after couple
of years, they're just squaring stones. They just need some reminding
that they're building a cathedral.
Glenn: I love that. Howie, if anybody that’s listening kind of felt move to get a
coaching session with you, is there a way that they can work that out?
Howie: Yeah. They should just send me an email, Howie at askhowie.com.
Glenn: Okay. You'll take it from there?
Howie: I have a whole website in askhowie.com that needs some snow
plowing. It’s just easier to send me an email rather than trying to give
you directions to Tuesday.
Glenn: If you kind of look for Howie’s website, you're going to get caught up in
the entrepreneurial side of what he does which is equally is valuable by
the way. I know Howie for a long time. He’s actually a very good friend
and colleague. We have a lot of similarities in our backgrounds. I can
definitely endorse him. Howie, thanks again. Would you be willing to
do this again?
Howie: Sure, anytime.
Glenn: Okay. I'll talk to you soon.
In just 12 weeks, you can become a certified professional coach,
confident in your ability and fully equipped to grow a thriving practice
10. from anywhere or your money back. My name is Dr. Glenn Livingston.
I'd like to talk you for a few minutes about taking your coaching dreams
a lot more seriously, about getting the right certification and training,
and about developing the confidence to deliver stellar results time after
time so your clients will accomplish their goals, others will notice and
get referred back to you.
I hope you will forgive my honesty when we talk because my wife and I
have more combined experience in both coaching and business
development in
10
[0:17:20.2]
virtually any other program on the market. I've personally worked with
over a thousand clients and supervised dozens of coaches and
therapists. Sharon had literally thousands of groups and team building
workshops and particularly sold more than $20,000,000 in consulting.
We’ve had a previous work research and theories covered in major
media like the New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, The Chicago
Sun-Times, ABC and CBS radio, TheWall Street Journal, New York
Daily News and many more.
We have the confidence in our ability to train and certify you as a coach
and give you the know-how to build the practice of your dreams. In fact,
we're so confident we're willing to guarantee it right through the end of
the very last class. If you don’t feel our training was your best choice for
any reason, just show us you attended at least three-quarters of the
classes and did at least 75% of the assignments, we will refund every
penny that you paid.
When you compare our experience, guarantee and more affordable
than most pricing, we think your choice will be clear. But if you're like
most coaches, you're probably a little skeptical, maybe a lot. You see a
lot of limitations and obstacles. I'd like to talk about them with you
because of them are self-imposed.
For example, you might think it's not really possible to earn a living as a
professional coach, maybe you think there's too much competition. But
did you know that as of this recording, there were only about 20,000
active coaches in North America? That’s less than one coach for every
15,000 people. Of course, not every one of those 15,000 people is in
the market for a coach.
Coaching is become ever more acceptable and interesting thanks to
reality shows like The Biggest Loser, The Voice, dancing shows, singing
shows, etcetera, etcetera. Every one of the contestants gets a coach
and the audience gets to see the value first hand as they progress.
11. More importantly, most coaches ignore the immense value of niching.
There’s literally hundreds of coaching niches to choose from. When
you do niche, you dramatically lower your competition and raise your
odds of success. For example, where there maybe 20,000 active
coaches overall in North America, how many adoption coaches do you
think there are?What about coaches specialized in chocolate
addiction? By the way, I could use one of those. Family business,
academic achievement. You don’t have to marry any of these niches
either. You just try one on for size, learn the skills and transfer them to
whatever suits your fancy later on.
Here’s another self-imposed limitation. Many people think it simply not
possible to earn a living as a coach or you can visit
becomearealcoach.com to see details that suggests the average active
coach earns about $55,000 per year. Of course, there are coaches who
make a lot more and coaches who make a lot less. It would be
unreasonable to assume just getting certified will automatically give you
this income. Your income as a
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[0:19:37.3]
coach will depend upon many things including the niche you choose.
For example, working with affluent couples to help them adopt is likely
to be more lucrative than helping disable veterans adjust to life at home.
Not anymore meaningful, fulfilling or soulful but definitely more
profitable. The environment you work in will also influence your income,
private practice versus a salaried employee, etcetera. The number of
hours you choose to fill, nobody says you have to work fulltime. The
fees that you're comfortable charging, there are a lot of coaches out
there that don’t want to charge as much as they really could charge.
The business model that you choose, in other words, individual
coaching versus selling books, tapes, seminars, groups and events
from leverage and passive income. The seriousness of the problem
that you specialized in, how desperate are your clients to solve it, how
meaningful and valuable is the solution.
For example, it's easier to earn more as an adoption coach than a yoga
coach for this very reason. Your income also depends upon how much
effort you put into attracting clients. But most importantly, in our
experience, your income is related to your coaching confidence and
ability to produce stellar results for your clients. Or maybe the obstacle
stopping you from taking your coaching dreams to the next level is
wondering whether you need a professional background in therapy or
counseling - but you don’t because coaching isn’t therapy. You won’t
get involved in diagnosing, treating, or curing any type of mental illness.
We'll teach you how to clearly draw the line and skillfully refer clients
who require a license professional. When in doubt, refer it out, is our
motto.
12. Coincidentally, many of these professionals who you refer to can
become a good resource referrals back into your network. Maybe
you're not sure if you're worthy of coaching. Maybe you think you don’t
have enough experience or you just not credible enough to coach
people professionally or that you don’t have the expertise. When
people tell me this, I tell them that they're asking the wrong question.
See, if you're willing to put your heart and soul into helping someone, if
you're willing to give them your undivided attention on a regular or semi-regular
basis until they reach their goal, if you're willing to make them a
priority in your life in exchange for a reasonable payment then the real
question is, you should be asking, “Are these clients worthy of me?”
Because you see, you've only got a limited amount of time, energy and
love to give these people so you've got to protect your practice. The
real question is, “Are they worthy of you?"
Maybe you don’t think you have the time to become a certified
professional coach but if you can make four or five hours a week which
is under an hour a day for just a few months, you can definitely become
a certified professional coach in our program. There are many, many
ways to start a
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coaching practice on a part-time schedule. We know most coaches
have very busy lives even before they begin. Because we actually like
coaches who are out there living real lives, we work hard to
accommodate them. Coaching is more about the experience and the
desire to share and spare than it is about book of knowledge.
Maybe you think you can’t afford it. But our program is much more
affordable than most of the live interactive certification programs. We've
got financing options to suit any budget. Besides, coaching is one of
the least expensive businesses to start because you can work with
people all over the world via telephone, Skype and the Internet. There's
really no need for office space, rent or other overhead. We'll show how
to make a safe transition plan so you can carefully plan your move from
another job with a great deal of confidence when the time is right.
Because you are the product, this is another reason why coaching is
easier to get into and less expensive because you are the product.
Many of the traditional costs associated with starting a business like
inventory or research and development, production cost, they just
simply disappear. At the risk of appearing self-serving, a better
question then, can you really afford to do this is, can you really afford
not to do?
Finally, perhaps you think you’re going to be a great coach but you're
too allergic to marketing to do anything about it. If you feel this way, it’s
likely because you've been taught the wrong things about marketing.
13. You're probably thinking of used car salesman, cold calling, constant
rejection and constant lies. Nobody's taking the time to find out what
marketing methods really suit your personality. Remember, Sharon and
I have more combined experience in both coaching and business
development and virtually any other certification program on the market.
That means we’ve got the flexibility to help virtually any coach who
wants it bad enough.
You can check out our website at becomearealcoach.com for more
details about our personal biographies. But for now, just trust me when
I say if you don’t like public speaking, there's no problem. If you hate
making cold calls, there's no problem. If you can’t even stand the idea
of making a website, there's no problem because we'll show how to
market in a way that’s comfortable for you.
Now, by this point, you may actually be wondering what happens in the
certification program itself. Again, you can visit becomearealcoach.com
to read the details but in a nutshell, our program is largely about the
experience of being a coach and not the academic.
Each week, you'll meet live with your instructor and your peers and
have the experience of practicing that week's coaching or business
development lesson with everybody in the group. You'll get detailed
feedback from your master
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coach instructor. You'll get additional feedback from your peers. Here's
an important benefit most people don’t think of. You'll get a chance to
observe and learn from the other coaches in training. Then after each
event, you'll download a brief set of materials which prepare for you for
the following week and include an action challenge.
In short, first, you practice with your peers then you watch, read or listen
to what's described, what you just experienced. Finally, you do it on
your own outside of class so you can integrate the learning, practice,
study then do. It’s really that simple in less than an hour a day. There’s
a quite a bit more to know, so you want to visit becomearealcoach.com
as soon as you can but the most important thing to remember is that in
just 12 weeks, you really can become a certified professional coach,
confident in your ability and fully equipped to grow a thriving practice
from anywhere or your money back.
Head on over to www.BecomeARealcoach.com now. Classes fill
quickly so please book your slot today if you're at all interested.
Thanks!