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Teen Dating Violence Outline 
Breathe.. 
1. Introduce yourself and your position within the agency 
a. Gender usage. This is really important with this group! Equality 
b. Question format 
2. House of Ruth services 
· Shelter: Emergency and Transitional 
· Counseling: Group and individual 
· Children’s program 
· Case management 
· Legal advocacy 
· CHAT: Counseling for children, teens exposed to violence/trauma 
· Community Education 
3. The goal of this presentation: Overview of Unhealthy Relationships, Alliance Building 
4. Why do we talk about Teen Dating Violence? 
a. 1 in 3 
5. Warning Signs 
a. Jealousy, Possessiveness, Controlling 
6. Teen Dating Violence is all about Power and Control 
7. Types of abuse in a relationship. Where does it start? 
a. Physical abuse 
i. hickies 
ii. pushing, throwing, kicking. Not necessarily you but around you. 
iii. slapping, grabbing, hitting, punching, tripping, bruising, choking, shaking 
iv. pinching, biting 
v. holding, restraining, not letting you in the car, get out of the car 
vi. breaking bones 
vii. leaving you places 
viii. burning, especially cigarette 
ix. hair pulling 
b. Mental/Emotional/Verbal Abuse 
i. Unreasonable jealousy 
ii. Extreme moodiness 
iii. Silent treatment/ Withdrawal of affection 
iv. "I would die without you..." 
v. “They don’t understand our love…” 
vi. Manipulation 
vii. destruction of the victim’s personal property and possessions, or threats to do so 
viii. threatening to break up with them 
ix. yelling or screaming 
x. name-calling. Ex: bitch as a term of endearment 
xi. criticizing or diminishing the victim’s accomplishments or goals 
xii. criticizing the victim’s friends, family, clothes…
c. Sexual abuse 
i. sexual assault: unwanted sexual touching 
ii. rape: unwanted sexual penetration 
iii. sexual exploitation: forcing someone to participate in stripping, prostitution or 
pornography 
iv. sexual harassment: unwanted verbal or visual sexual attention, comments, gestures, 
forcing someone to look at pornography. Sexting is often child pornography, can be used 
for “Sextortion.” 
v. Yes means Yes & No Means No. Consent = Active and Enthusiastic 
d. Stalking/ Cyber stalking 
i. repeated phone calls, texts. Becoming mad that they don’t get a call back. 
ii. following someone 
iii. going through someone’s cell phone when they are not there 
iv. GPS 
v. stalking through facebook, etc. 
vi. suddenly showing up at school, or work 
vii. having their friends “spy” on them while they are not with the batterer. 
viii. contacting the victim’s friends, family, co-workers, or neighbors to find out about 
the victim 
e. Social abuse 
i. embarrassing, making fun of the victim in front of family or friends including online 
ii. excessive possessiveness, isolation from friends and family 
iii. their only friends are each other 
iv. rumors, lies, gossip. Turning people against victim or vice versa. 
8. The Cycle of Violence 
a. Honeymoon 
b. Tension 
c. Explosion 
9. Why victims Stay 
a. Fear 
b. Guilt 
c. Isolation 
d. School 
e. Social status 
f. Love 
10. If this is a one time presentation: How to Help a Friend 
a) Bring up Subject 
b) Validate feelings, acknowledge seriousness 
c) Don’t buy into denial 
d) Respect their right to make her own decision 
e) Provide Options: 
a. Talk to a parent, counselor, etc. 
b. Restraining Order -can get at 12 years old without parental consent
c. Refer to resources (House of Ruth): Remind about our Hotline. 
f) Assess safety & make safety plan (Vary their routine- take different routes to school, classes, and home.)

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Sample tdv outline

  • 1. Teen Dating Violence Outline Breathe.. 1. Introduce yourself and your position within the agency a. Gender usage. This is really important with this group! Equality b. Question format 2. House of Ruth services · Shelter: Emergency and Transitional · Counseling: Group and individual · Children’s program · Case management · Legal advocacy · CHAT: Counseling for children, teens exposed to violence/trauma · Community Education 3. The goal of this presentation: Overview of Unhealthy Relationships, Alliance Building 4. Why do we talk about Teen Dating Violence? a. 1 in 3 5. Warning Signs a. Jealousy, Possessiveness, Controlling 6. Teen Dating Violence is all about Power and Control 7. Types of abuse in a relationship. Where does it start? a. Physical abuse i. hickies ii. pushing, throwing, kicking. Not necessarily you but around you. iii. slapping, grabbing, hitting, punching, tripping, bruising, choking, shaking iv. pinching, biting v. holding, restraining, not letting you in the car, get out of the car vi. breaking bones vii. leaving you places viii. burning, especially cigarette ix. hair pulling b. Mental/Emotional/Verbal Abuse i. Unreasonable jealousy ii. Extreme moodiness iii. Silent treatment/ Withdrawal of affection iv. "I would die without you..." v. “They don’t understand our love…” vi. Manipulation vii. destruction of the victim’s personal property and possessions, or threats to do so viii. threatening to break up with them ix. yelling or screaming x. name-calling. Ex: bitch as a term of endearment xi. criticizing or diminishing the victim’s accomplishments or goals xii. criticizing the victim’s friends, family, clothes…
  • 2. c. Sexual abuse i. sexual assault: unwanted sexual touching ii. rape: unwanted sexual penetration iii. sexual exploitation: forcing someone to participate in stripping, prostitution or pornography iv. sexual harassment: unwanted verbal or visual sexual attention, comments, gestures, forcing someone to look at pornography. Sexting is often child pornography, can be used for “Sextortion.” v. Yes means Yes & No Means No. Consent = Active and Enthusiastic d. Stalking/ Cyber stalking i. repeated phone calls, texts. Becoming mad that they don’t get a call back. ii. following someone iii. going through someone’s cell phone when they are not there iv. GPS v. stalking through facebook, etc. vi. suddenly showing up at school, or work vii. having their friends “spy” on them while they are not with the batterer. viii. contacting the victim’s friends, family, co-workers, or neighbors to find out about the victim e. Social abuse i. embarrassing, making fun of the victim in front of family or friends including online ii. excessive possessiveness, isolation from friends and family iii. their only friends are each other iv. rumors, lies, gossip. Turning people against victim or vice versa. 8. The Cycle of Violence a. Honeymoon b. Tension c. Explosion 9. Why victims Stay a. Fear b. Guilt c. Isolation d. School e. Social status f. Love 10. If this is a one time presentation: How to Help a Friend a) Bring up Subject b) Validate feelings, acknowledge seriousness c) Don’t buy into denial d) Respect their right to make her own decision e) Provide Options: a. Talk to a parent, counselor, etc. b. Restraining Order -can get at 12 years old without parental consent
  • 3. c. Refer to resources (House of Ruth): Remind about our Hotline. f) Assess safety & make safety plan (Vary their routine- take different routes to school, classes, and home.)