1. Dr. Thomas Clark
Department of Management
clarkt@xavier.edu
312 Smith Hall

2. Etiquette
◦ rules governing socially acceptable
behavior
◦ practices and forms prescribed by
social convention

3.  Golden: Treat others as you would
like to be treated
 Platinum: Treat others as they would
like to be treated

4.  Communicate in terms of your objectives not
in terms of your feelings (The advice to “Be
Yourself” is misleading)
 Understand what interpersonal and
professional criteria are for the interview
 Plan your behavior in terms of meeting both
sets of criteria

5.  Beforeyou enter a situation, visualize what
you are going to say and do—and then
mentally rehearse how you believe your
audience will respond
 At
the same time, visualize what your
audience’s most preferred communicator
would be saying and doing. How close can
you come to their “ideal other”?

6. Two Stages
Initial Perception— (Immediate)
Sustained Perception— (Over
Time)

7. People begin to evaluate us
before any words are ever spoken
Who you are speaks so loudly I do
not hear what you say--Emerson

8.  Light scent  Neatly combed
 Clean and hair
trimmed  Polished shoes
fingernails  Stockings without
 Limited jewelry runs
 Concealed tattoos  Belts on pants
 No visible body  Color of socks,
jewelry belt, & shoes
matches

9.  Pumper
 Dead Fish
 Squeezer
 Two handed
 Equal, with direct eye contact

10.  Ask yourself, “What would the other person
like to hear me say first?”
 This will allow you to say something that will
show you see things from the other person’s
point of view.
 E.g., a compliment, followed by a question that
allows him or her to say something positive

11. Applicants who focused more
◦ on being pleasant, agreeable, and offering
compliments to interviewers and their companies
were deemed better fits to their prospective jobs
(and were hired at a higher rate) than
◦ applicants who focused more their credentials for
the job.

12. Compliment others, orally or in writing, on
something important to them
Example of written praise: I am writing to
express my appreciation for the expertise you
shared with me yesterday about the skills I
need to develop to excel as a marketing
professional. I value your insight and will
implement all your excellent suggestions.

13. Principle: Your communication often predicts
the response of the Receiver.
Exercise:
 Alternate reading the comments on the left
hand side of the handout.
 Then do the same with the right hand side.

14. USE PHRASES THAT BRING OUT THE BEST IN
YOUR LISTENER
• I know you want what is fair for both of us.
• I am sure you will do your best to help me out.
• I am counting on you.
• I enjoy working for you because you respond so
effectively to your employees’ needs.

15. Be positive about your
 company,
 work,
 boss,
 peers & coworkers,
 customers & suppliers
 & yourself

16. - Integrity: Telling the truth
- Reliability :Doing what you say you will do

17.  How do you know someone is listening to
you?
• Eye communication; undivided attention; encouragers;
nonverbal positives, writing something down
 How do you feel when you know someone is
listening to you?
 Respected, valued, confident, liked
 How do you describe a person who is
listening to you?
 Courteous, attentive, empathetic, respectful

18.  How do you know someone is ignoring you?
◦ Lack of eye contact; other signs of indifference
 How does it make you feel when you are
ignored?
• Nervous, insignificant, unintelligent
 How do you describe a person who has
ignored you?
• Rude, arrogant, distant, jackass

19.  Hello.My name is Libby Smith. I am here for a
1 o’clock appointment with Mr. Jones.
 Keyfact: 90% of managers ask their
secretary’s opinions of job applicants

20. Even when asking questions, have your voice
end on with a downward inflection.
Say “What time is the meeting?” once with voice
raising at the end and one with voice ending
with a downward inflection.

21.  Get business cards from everyone you meet and
makes notes on it about when you met, what you
had in common, and details about the person,
including names of children
 Record the information into an electronic data base
for future reference
 Prefer the formal to the informal, especially with
older and higher ranking people
 Avoid “I’m sorry, I have forgotten your name”
Instead, say “Help me out. Your name was on the
tip of my tongue & now eludes me”

22.  Goal is to express thanks and promote your
objectives
◦ Opening: Express appreciation and compliment the
receiver
◦ Body: Summarize what you see as mutual benefit of
meeting
◦ Closing: Indicate next steps
◦ PS: Make a positive comment and/or make an offer
to return the favor

23.  Reply to all invitations within 48 hours.
 Be gracious if you need to refuse
Thank you for inviting me to breakfast to hear Frank
Jones of your legal department speak next Friday.
Given his outstanding reputation, I am confident I
have much to learn from him.
As I have another meeting scheduled for that time, I
will be unable to attend. I appreciate your kindness
and look forward to speaking with you in the near
future.

24.  Plan your phone calls just as you would
other verbal messages. Focus the message on
what’s really important.
 Be prepared for either a live
conversation or voice mail. Be ready to
eliminate most of the social pleasantries and
get right to the message if you get a voice
mail system.

25.  Identifyyourself and your college
 Ask the person if he or she has time to talk
 Make calls during normal business hours
 Return calls the same day
 Do not
• put someone on hold without asking
permission.
• do other work while on the phone

26.  Outline points you want to make prior to
placing a call.
 Write down the name or names of the parties
with whom you will be speaking
 If your party is not there, leave a brief
message and request a telephone
appointment
 If your party answers, identify yourself, stick
to your outline and thank the person at the
end of the call.

27.  Provide only your cell phone number to
business contacts
 You do not want a roommate or a parent
answering a call intended for you because
you cannot control what they say or the
image they will project of you

28.  After hours calls or texts can be answered
 Employees communicate with people in
different time zones
 Receptionists take incomplete or
inaccurate messages

29.  Talking too fast or slow
◦ 175-250 words per minute
 Not enough information
 Can’t understand the message
 No return telephone or person name left in
message

30.  Keep it short and simple. Aim to keep voice
mail messages less than 30 seconds.
 Start with a WHAT/WHY/WHEN opening, add
details as needed, and finish with follow-up.
 Be sure listeners can contact you easily.
Speak slowly enough for them to understand your
name and phone number. For longer messages,
include the contact information at both the
beginning and the end of the message.
 Clarify timing. Listeners usually appreciate
specific deadlines, as long as they are reasonable
and important. Consider saying when you will be
free to take a call.

31.  Hi, Sandra. This is Jane Maple at 6108. I’m calling
to invite you to a status meeting on the Revised
Commuter Parking project. We’re going to present
results and plans that resulted from our analysis of
survey data, so this would be a great opportunity
for you to see how Student Government may get
involved in 2 or 3 months.
 Here are the details: the meeting is at 9 a.m. on
Wednesday the 6th in Conference Room D and
should last about 45 minutes. If you can’t make it,
please send someone else so SGA can be up to
date.
 Again, this is Jane at 6108. I look forward to seeing
you Wednesday morning.

32.  Start with an upbeat greeting including your
name so caller knows he or she has reached
the right person
 Indicate how the caller can get a response
 Close on a positive note, e.g., Make it a great
day!
 Listen to your recording
 Does it sound upbeat? Professional?
 Can the listener hear a smile in your voice?

33. Do not have
◦ a cute message
◦ background music
◦ a long introductory comment before
the beep

34.  Be present: Give your full attention to
those you are with, such as when in a
meeting or on a date.
 Before making or taking a call, texting or
emailing in public, consider if your
actions will impact others. If they will,
reconsider, wait or move away first.
 Don't use a mobile device while using a
restroom.
 Put on vibrate or silent when in meetings

35.  What happens when a recruiter “Googles”
you?
 What will be revealed about you on Facebook
or MySpace?

36.  Google yourself
◦ Investigate any link with your name attached to it
 Clean up your account
◦ Remove or de-tag
 unflattering photos and text
 inappropriate wall posts
 anything others might find offensive
 Use privacy settings so you control who will
see your profile

37.  Make your profiles an extension of your
resume
 Write positive things about yourself in the
Interest and Activities sections
 Demonstrate your passion for the career field
of your choice
 Post pictures of yourself performing a job
relevant action or service

38.  Orienting: Directory indicates relevance
 Skimming: Does it look organized? Concise?
 Scanning: Read 1st paragraph, headings, and
last paragraph
 Reading: Read entire email

39.  Use an appropriate and easy to remember
email address: ryansmith@gmail.com
 Consider creating one solely for job
correspondence
 Avoid cute addresses: donjuana@xu.edu or
thehitman@hotmail.com

40.  Messages:
◦ Keep e-mail concise by including only information
readers will find important.
◦ Limit e-mails to one topic and no more than two
screens
 Paragraphs:
◦ Most paragraphs should be 2-6 lines long.
◦ Avoid paragraphs more than 8 lines long.

41. Include an accurate subject line, one which
indicates the purpose of the message
◦ Thank you from Regina Myles
◦ Request for meeting with Regina Myles
◦ Confirmation of lunch at 3:00 tomorrow with
Regina Myles
◦ Regina Myles’ W-9 mailed today

42. Identify the receiver’s preferred title and use it,
including Dr., Prof., Mr. Ms., and Mrs.
If you do not have a name, address a title or
company, such as Dear Human Resources
Department or Dear Hiring Manager
Avoid 19th century salutations, such as To
Whom It May Concern; Gentlemen or Ladies

43. To respect readers’ time, limit greetings to one
short sentence or phrase
 --Thank you for meeting with me last week.
I’m writing to ask …
 --Greetings! I’m writing because Dr. Sakkab
suggested I contact you given your expertise
concerning the use of hedging to control for
currency fluctuations

44.  --Good morning from Xavier University! The
weather has improved tremendously since
you were here last week. No more snow or
slush and no more problems finding on street
parking, the bane of the commuting student
[Blah, blah …]
 A postscript (PS). can contain kudos and
other pleasantries—after main message is
concisely communicated

45.  Focus on starting with a clear WHAT, WHY,
and WHEN. Be sure the message contains all the
information readers need to act properly.
 Use the opening paragraph to tell readers
WHAT the key issues covered in the
message referring explicitly to products,
people, and issues:
◦ I am writing to accept your invitation to attend a
luncheon on 2/9/10 at the Queen City Club to honor
Juanita Gomez

46.  Let readers know in the first sentence if you
want them to do something in response to
the e-mail:
◦ Please send me the link to article on the implications
of Sarbanes Oxley for jobs in the field of compliance
that you referenced in our recent interview at Xavier
University.
 When responding to an e-mail, consider
starting with in response to your request ,
to orient your reader quickly to your
purpose in writing:
◦ In response to your request, I have attached a copy of
my resume, which I tailored specifically to the criteria
listed in the position description.

47. Make your e-mails skimmable and scannable
◦ Use headings and subheadings to create a
scannable outline of your message
 In a follow up to a job interview, you might use these 3
headings: Relevant Education, Work Experience, and
Leadership Qualities
◦ Use lists, including numbers and bullet points, to
improve the “curb appeal” of your e-mail and to
make information easier to retrieve
 Limit lists to five or fewer points.

48. Re: Dates Maureen O’Donnell can meet for Interview in
Chicago
In response to your request, here are the dates when I am available to
meet you in Chicago for the follow-up interview with Nielsen market
research team.
Time & Place: I understand we will meet from 6-8 pm at Everest
which is located on top of the Chicago Board of Trade.
Dates: I can meet with you on any of the following dates which I
selected from the list you sent me.
◦ Wednesday, February 3
◦ Thursday, February 4
◦ Tuesday, February 9
◦ Wednesday, February 10
Follow up: I look forward to meeting with you and the Nielsen team
in the near future.
Maureen O’Donnell
P. S. I am eager to learn more about the employment opportunities at
Nielsen and am excited by the prospect of working for the world’s
leading market research firm.

49. Indicate Who, will do What, When, and, as
appropriate, Why
As requested, I will
4. Create a portfolio of my best market
research work, including statistical analyses
research papers, and presentation slides,
and
5. Send it today to Ms. Frankel of Nielsen so
she can add it to my application

50. An auto signature should include
other ways of reaching the writer
 Fax
 Cell phone
 Snail mail,
 IM

51. P. S. Thank you so much for the time you took from
your busy schedule at the Meet the Firms event
yesterday to tell about the wonderful internship
and employment opportunities available to Xavier
accounting majors.
I appreciate the details you shared of your successful
experience and deep insight into the field and am
more convinced than ever that accounting is the
best profession for me.

52. ◦ Do not use colored stationery
◦ Do not “decorate” your signature
with flowers, balloons, or other icons
◦ Consider omitting inspirational or
religious quotations

53.  Capitalize the first letter of a word beginning
a sentence as well as the pronoun, I.
 Insert a line of white space between
paragraphs to facilitate easy reading.
 Set up reply feature to put your message
above the one to which it is replying

54.  DO NOT USE ALL CAPITALS FOR ANY
SENTENCES! Use courteous language
which suggests a calm and rational
tone.
 Avoid abbreviations, slang
expressions, and emoticons, such as
the following: BTW, can U plz send
info on nxt steps? Thx 

55.  Use language that tells others you are taking
them seriously.
 Avoid words that suggest indifference,
communicated by such commonplace phrases
as OK, Will Do, Sounds Right, Got that Right
Dude!!

56.  Make sure the recipient’s name and the name
of the Company is spelled accurately
 Proofread carefully before filling in the “To”
address to avoid accidentally sending an
unfinished or unreviewed message
 Edit for polite tone
 Proofread for grammar, punctuation and
diction
 Spell-check for accuracy

57.  Do not use email to the exclusion of other
media as it is best used for simple,
noncontroversial communication
 Use a face to face meeting or a telephone call
for sensitive, controversial, or complex issues

58.  IM and text messaging are best used for
gaining information or perspective that you
need quickly and that is simple for the
receiver to provide.
 Get permission to use these media. Keep in
mind receivers sometimes believe these IM
and text messages require an instant
response and may see it as an interruption of
their plans for that time.

59. • Positive regard for others
• Sincerity
• Empathy
• Tact
• Respect for diversity

60. Thank You