3. Section 1:
How to
Effectively
Communicat Section 2:
e Understandin
g Traditional
Parent-
Teacher
Conferences
Section 3:
Understandin
g Student-Led
Conferences
4. Qualities of Good Communicators:
1. Restate the parents’ concerns.
2. Show respect for the other person.
3. Recognize the parents’ feelings.
4. Tailor discussions to fit the parents’ ability to handle the
situation. Do not touch off the fuse of a parent who might not
be able to handle a child’s difficulties.
5. Emphasize the concerns are no one’s fault.
6. Remember that no one ever wins an argument.
7. Protect the parents’ egos.
8. Focus on one issue at a time.
9. Listen.
10. Become allies with parents.
(Berger, 1995, as cited in Shelton & Pollingue, 2009).
5. Teacher Guidelines for Parent Conferences
Conference Do’s: Conference Don’ts:
• Be positive and • Don’t be defensive
personal. when parents ask
• Show that you care. about the classroom.
• Be a good listener • Don’t let a
and watch the time. conference become
• Use examples of confrontational.
children’s work. • Don’t surprise
• Give and take parents.
suggestions. • Don’t use jargon.
• Have a specialist on
hand if needed.
(Million, 2005 as cited in Shelton &
6. Dealing With the Anger of Parents
1. Have someone else present (teacher, administration, etc.)
2. Offer them a seat in a private setting – get off your feet
3. Wait and listen
4. Do not become defensive – tone of voice
5. Speak softly, slowly, remain calm & be aware of your posture
6. Show genuine interest in the student – express this
7. Do not fear anger – understand its origins
8. Try to determine the cause of the anger
9. Sometimes suggest a later meeting time
10. Use phrases that are placating
11. Not all parents are going to leave feeling good
12. Acknowledge their anger – convey concern
13. Avoid using angry responses, sarcasm, or negative
nonverbal cues
14. Seek assistance or support from principal or counselor
(Morehead, 2001 as cited in Shelton & Pollingue, 2009)
7. Placating Responses
• “I feel uncomfortable discussing this now. Could we set
up a time we could meet that would be convenient?”
• “I can appreciate how frustrating…”
• “We are here to help your child, and have only his best
interest at heart.”
• “Let me see if I understand what you are concerned
about.”
• “What do you want me to do? How do you want me to
accomplish this?” Follow with
• “What can we do together?”
(Morehead, 2001 as cited in Shelton & Pollingue, 2009)
8. 5 Main Goals of a Student-Led Conference
• To encourage students to accept personal
responsibility for their academic performance;
• To teach students the process of self-evaluation;
• To facilitate the development of students’
organizational and oral communication skills and to
increase their self-confidence;
• To encourage students, parents, and teachers to
engage in open and honest dialogue; and
• To increase parent attendance at conferences
(Hackmann, 1997 as cited in Shelton & Pollingue, 2009)
9. Shelton, C. F. , & Pollingue, A. B. (2009). The
exceptional teacher’s handbook: The first-year special
education teacher’s guide to success. Thousand
Oaks, CA: Corwin.
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