1. SOC200 Marriage and Family WORKSHOP 5 “ Communication, Conflict and Divorce” Instructor: Glenn Johnson
2. DEVOTIONS & PRAYER I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:1-3, NIV
3. COMMUNICATION & CONFLICT IN FAMILIES We are Created For Community “ basis for the word: COMMUNICATION ”
6. COMMUNICATION & CONFLICT IN FAMILIES 3 STYLES OF CONFLICT BEHAVIOR Complementary Symmetrical Parallel
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8. EMOTIONAL WOUNDEDNESS -In Community Systems -Negative Experiences Inform Child’s Identity -Degrees of Woundedness -Affects Across the Life Span -We Can Only Act Insofar As We Feel -KEY: The other person is not to blame for how I feel
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11. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Almost Everything is Disposable! God hates divorce …not divorced people.
12. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Marked by GRIEF US has one of highest divorce rates in the world
13. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein and Kelly Followed 60 Families with 131 Children for 25 Years
14. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein: Effects on Society -171 Cities over 100,000 -Divorce rate predicted robbery rate -More likely to be delinquent -More likely to abuse substances
15. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein: Effects on Education -Young children feared abandonment -Lower preschool readiness -Of graduates, only 65% from divorced families went on to college vs. 85 %
16. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein: Effects on Family Economy -Almost immediate financial consequences -More significant for women than men
17. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein: Effects on Personal Well-Being -Children suffer from loneliness, fear, worry, guilt, sadness, despair, depression -Half entered adulthood this way -Greater risks to physical health
18. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND HOW TO PREVENT IT Wallerstein: Effects on Parent-Child Relationships, Conflict & Social Confidence -Parents: Partially “divorce” children too -Mothers can become emotionally dependent on children -Non-custodial parents are less likely to have close relationships to children
22. PREVENTING DIVORCE PREVENTING DIVORCE -Commit to the marriage -Have correct expectations -Get outside help when it is necessary -Count the cost of divorce before giving up -Know that to choose divorce will greatly disappoint God -Remember God’s goal for one’s life (not necessarily happiness) -Learn to honor one’s spouse above oneself -Prevention is best done prior to marriage: by premarital counseling -Married and feeling trapped? Consider ramifications of divorce for both partners and children. Seek help. -Marriage requires patience, some work and practice and strong commitment.
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24. SUMMARY & WRAP UP -We’ve discussed transitions families go through, the difficulties experienced and the problems families encounter -We’ve discussed how we select mates and how two become one in marriage and have looked at ways in how we can make our marriage a good one -We’ve studied challenges and joys children bring to the marriage and how to be good parents -We’ve also looked at the general life stage transitions in the middle and later years of life and why and how families change and respond to stress Finally we’ve looked at communication and conflict and resolving them in families and the consequences of divorce
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26. SUMMARY & WRAP UP STRONG FAMILES TAKE: -Commitment -Appreciation and Affection -Positive Communication -Time Together -Spiritual Well Being -Ability to Cope With Stress and Crisis
