You might remember my sister Cindy, but if you do not, permit me to give you a brief summary: My sis...

1. Caring for A Mother at Home: Remember Her Emotional
Needs
You might remember my sister Cindy,
but if you do not, permit me to give you
a brief summary: My sister owned a
very successful stuff-handling business
for many years, but she gave it up to
care for our parents in their later years.
The timing was appropriate for our
parents and my sister surely wanted
her. Along the way, Cindy gained
insight.
I'd like to talk about a small but critical
piece of the penetration Cindy realized
while caring for our mom -- the
significance of focusing on the psychological requirements of the maturing parent/patient, rather
than letting the need for "physical care" to become your complete relationship.
Once you read Cindy's remarks below, I would suggest that you seek assistance in the event you
realize that you are consumed using the "physical caring" only and missing the ability to fully enjoy
the psychological and relationship needs of your beloved.
While caring for my very ill Mum in the last years of her life, she was bound and completely reliant.
Due to problems in coming off the ventilator while in the hospital, she had been sent home with a
tracheotomy that she continued to live with. She had a feeding tube for nutritional support and of
course, she had a urinary catheter. The extensive quantity of attention that had to be delivered to
Mom every day was overwhelming at times. It was important to help keep the tracheotomy site,
catheter site, as well as the feeding tube website really clean to stop illness. Along with altering and
bathing her continuously, it was a very active 24 hours for me.
But there was. When you are making sure you get it right and so focused on a your loved one's care,
you will often forget about your loved one's emotional demands. Here are some things I learned:
Ensure their room is bright with a lot of keepsakes about. Try and reminisce together about the need
for a certain keepsake and let them tell stories of its own worth to you.
If possible, have their bed near a window to allow them to look out. My mother enjoyed birds and the
squirrels we fed outside her window. If no window is available, place pictures in their preferred
scenes in their own field of vision.
Tune in to their own history. My mother especially enjoyed me to pay attention to her talk about her
service in watching VHS movies with her about the war and WWII as a Morse code operator.
Take time for beauty! I learned to spend extra hours brushing my mum's hair, applying the lotions
she loved, and filing her nails.

2. Cease and spend time together. Sometimes my mother merely wanted me to sit with her and hold
her hand. She adored me reading to her until she fell asleep.
Toward the finish of Mother's time she said to me, "Please hug me, no one has hugged me recently."
It broke my heart to believe I'd missed this very unique element of her care. With all the work that
was daily that was ongoing to make certain her physical care was finished, I'd forgotten one of the
most crucial areas of care giving - spending mom and loving -daughter time with my Mother.
Should you get in a situation such as this, where much physical care is being administered by you
that there doesn't appear to be hours or energy left to stop and spend time with your loved one,
please seek help. Being a real caregiver can be challenging. There are caregiver services that will
allow you that time you along with your loved one truly need so you may be a daughter.
Private Home Care