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Screenplay
FADE IN
black screan then this comes up
People who obsess over art, music, and poetry and think
they’re so unique even though there are millions of them.
Those guys are a bunch of art fags.

INT. MARKS ROOM.DAY

Mark, a 17 year old slight   geek who likes to dress smart
almost aspirational. He is   attempting to put a portfolio
together, the art isn’t of   a high standard. He looks up at a
calendar on this wall with   a date circled saying interview
for art school.


INT. PALLS ROOM. DAY
Pall a 17 year old kid whatever is sat hunched working on
something.

Mark walks in to pall’s room with out knocking first
                    MARK
          hey man whats up . what are you
          doing

                    PALL
          have you ever heard of knocking,
          what would of happened if i was
          having a bash or some thing

                    MARK
          sorry man I’ll remember next time.
          are u ready to go
                    PALL
          ya wait down stairs i’ll be down in
          a minute i just need to take a
          piss.
Mark notices a pile in the corner covered in a sheet.


INT.
Mark walks down some stairs which open out into a living
room Where he see’s pall’s mum. Pall follows closely behind.
She is in her mid 30s, alcoholic, messy and sprawled on a
dirty looking sofa with a bottle of vodka in her hand


                                                   (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                               2.

                       MARK
             hello miss mallcovich

she grabs the bin next to her and stars vomiting into the
bin
                       PALL
             is she throwing up again, that
             stupid bitch lets go mark or were
             going to be late

EXT. PALLS ROAD
Mark and Pall are walking down the street

                        MARK
             So what where you up to in your
             room then?
                       PALL
             Shut up, you faggot its none of
             your buisness.
Pall punches Mark, he stumbles back and pretends it doesnt
hurt.

                       MARK
                  (in a cowardly way)
             Why did you do that?
They carry on walking down the street to school.


EXT. COURTYARD.DAY
Mark and Pall walk into to the courtyard of a private
school, as they get closer they notice Paula.

Paula notices them staring at her and her friends snigger.
                       PALL
             What the fuck are you slags
             laughing at!

Mark gets embarassed. The bells rings and everyone starts to
leave except Paula and Pall.
                       PALL
                  (to mark)
             well go on then..piss off
Mark looks hurt. he turns to Paula who smiles at him. Mark
leaves. Pall watches him go then turns to Paula

                                                   (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                               3.


                       PALL
             Paula i wanna show you something
                       PAULA
             Im busy, what do you want?

                       PALL
             I wanna show you this picture i
             drew of you
Pall pulls out the picture of her, she looks at it infront
of him and doesnt know what to say.
                       PAULA
             Why have you drawn a picture of me,
             are you stalking me?

                          PALL
                     (Offeneded)
             No...
                        PAULA
             Your such a wierdo, why would i
             want this?
Paula walks off leaving Pall standing.

INT.CLASSROOM.DAY

through the window of the classroom Mark watches as Pall
leaves the courtyard.

EXT. ROAD

Pall is walking home really angrely, kicking dustbins overs
                       PALL
             Fuck you god, what did i do wrong?

Pall is struck by lightning and explodes leaving just his
feet.

EXT. GRAVEYARD

Mark is standing upset at the funeral, a few people come up
to him saying how Pall was such a nice guy.
                       FUNERAL GUEST 1 O/S
             he was such a talent


                                                   (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                                4.


                       FUNERAL GUEST 2 O/S
             such a polite boy
                       FUNERAL GUEST 3 O/S
             kind and caring he loved his mum
             poor soul

The eulogies keep coming as we look at the blank expression
on Marks face.


INT. MARKS ROOM.DAY
The calender in marks room has only one red mark on it. The
Interview.


INT. SCHOOL COMMON ROOM.DAY
Mark goes to school the next day, Paula comes up to him
                       PAULA
             Pall was such a nice boy, its such
             a shame. He had such potential.
                       MARK
             what do you mean?
                       PAULA
             his artwork it was truly amazing
mark looks at her in a confused way.
                       MARK
             oh, is this about that picture pall
             gave you?
                       PAULA
             yes, it was really sweet
                       MARK
             i probably shouldn’t tell you this
             now, but i drew that picture, for
             him.
                       PAULA
             Oh... Ok well ill see you around.
                       MARK
             Bye
5.


INT. PALLS FLAT.NIGHT
Mark goes to palls flat, rings on the bell.
                    PALLS MUM
          what do you want?

                    MARK
          i left some of my school books
          here, could i get them quickly

                    PALLS MUM
          whatever, hurry up
Palls mum stumbles back over to the sofa and doesnt take any
notice of him.

Mark picks up the box he noticed before.
As he approaches the living room, he puts his head around
the corner and sees Palls mum passed out on the sofa, he
walks straight out.


INT. ART SCHOOL. DAY
Mark enters the room for his interview looking nervous. He
notices two old people with glasses and suits looking very
formal.

                    INTERVIEWERS 1
          Good afternoon, Mr. Burrows
                       MARK
          Hello

Mark shakes his hand and sits down
                    INTERVIEWERS 2
          So Mark why have you chosen to
          apply for ’London College of the
          Arts’?
                    MARK
          Its always been my dream to come
          here, you have no idea how hard its
          been for me to come here.

                     INTERVIEWERS 1
          Could we possibly see your
          portfolio?



                                                 (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                               6.


                       MARK
             I have it here
Mark hands them the portfolio, its a large book with pages
hanging out and rough doodles on the front.

                       INTERVIEWERS 2
             Thank you Mark, could you please
             wait outside for a a couple of
             minute.


INT. ART SCHOOL OFFICE. DAY
Mark is sitting patiently, he leans back and rubs his eyes.
As he moves his hands away he notices them coming out of the
room, very impressed.
They walk over to Mark
                       INTERVIEWERS 1
             Mark, we have looked over your work
             and would love to offer you a place
             at this college, your work is
             sensational.
                       INTERVIEWERS 2
             We would be honoured to offer you a
             place that our college, the college
             fees and infomation will be sent to
             your house.
                       MARK
             Sorry, but how much are the fees?

                       INTERVIEWERS 1
             $9,500 a term
                       MARK
             Ok well thank you, it was a
             pleasure
Mark walks off thinking about how he is going to pay for the
college.


INT. SCHOOL COMMON ROOM.DAY
mark walks in to the common room were his art teacher is
sitting with a cup of tea



                                                   (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                                7.


                       MARK
             sir i wandering if you could do me
             a favour , i have got in to the
             London Collage Of the Arts

                       TEACHER
             very well done mark im very proud
             of you , what was the favour you
             wanted
                       MARK
             ya could you help me set up a
             gallary, kind of like an art show,
             its the only way i can pay the
             school fees
                       TEACHER
             well i guess i could make a few
             calls i have a few friends that own
             gallarys
                       MARK
             thank you soo much sir


INT. MARK ROOM . EVENING
Mark is looking threw the stolen art work and trying to
decide what too show art show at that gallery.

He puts toghter a few pictures and paintings he thinks are
the best, and leaves to go to the art show.


INT. GALLERY
Mark is waiting around and no one is coming to his gallery
except his art teacher.
After a short while we see loads of his fellow students
flooding through the door, after a short montage of him
showing people his art.

EXT. OUTSIDE GALLERY. NIGHT

Paula approaches Mark who is having a cigarette
                       PAULA
             Mark, i know that Pall did that
             picture of me...



                                                   (CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:                                              8.


                       MARK
             Paula just fuck off, this is my big
             night i dont need you ruining it
                       PAULA
             How can you do this to Pall he was
             your best mate
                       MARK
             You, me and everyone hates that kid
             why are you sticking up for him
             now?
                       PAULA
             What your doing is wrong!
Mark walks off back towards the gallery, throwing his
cigarette into the road angerly

EXT. OUTSIDE GALLERY. NIGHT
Mark is outside having a cigarette again, just about to go
home. When he is approached by a man, wearing a suit and
specs.
                        ART DEALER
             Mark, i just want to congratulate
             you on your show it was truely
             inspiring.
                       MARK
             Thank you sir, i worked hard for it
                       ART DEALER
             I represent some very high up art
             collectors and i think they would
             be very interested in your work, i
             would like to give you an offer for
             the load.

                       MARK
             Well, ofcourse thats amazing
the art dealers says nothing, gets out a checkbook,
scribbles on it and passes it to mark.

We see the check says $2,000,000
                       ART DEALER
             I think that should surfice
9.


EXT. PAULA’S FRONTDOOR. NIGHT
Mark sprints up to Paulas door and pants then presses the
buzzer.
Paula opens the door

                    PAULA
          what do you want Mark?
                    MARK
          you where right the art work was
          Palls, but i have enough money for
          us to start a life toghter, im
          sorry but look
Mark shows her the check

                    MARK
          So what do you say, would you run
          away with me and leave this
          shithole

                    PAULA
          what you want me pack my thing now
          and leave in the midlle of the
          night leave my hole life behind
                    MARK
          il get you new things we can make a
          new life together
                       PAULA
paula grabs mark and kisses him

                    MARK
          so i guess thats a yess

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Art Fags -Screen Play

  • 2. FADE IN black screan then this comes up People who obsess over art, music, and poetry and think they’re so unique even though there are millions of them. Those guys are a bunch of art fags. INT. MARKS ROOM.DAY Mark, a 17 year old slight geek who likes to dress smart almost aspirational. He is attempting to put a portfolio together, the art isn’t of a high standard. He looks up at a calendar on this wall with a date circled saying interview for art school. INT. PALLS ROOM. DAY Pall a 17 year old kid whatever is sat hunched working on something. Mark walks in to pall’s room with out knocking first MARK hey man whats up . what are you doing PALL have you ever heard of knocking, what would of happened if i was having a bash or some thing MARK sorry man I’ll remember next time. are u ready to go PALL ya wait down stairs i’ll be down in a minute i just need to take a piss. Mark notices a pile in the corner covered in a sheet. INT. Mark walks down some stairs which open out into a living room Where he see’s pall’s mum. Pall follows closely behind. She is in her mid 30s, alcoholic, messy and sprawled on a dirty looking sofa with a bottle of vodka in her hand (CONTINUED)
  • 3. CONTINUED: 2. MARK hello miss mallcovich she grabs the bin next to her and stars vomiting into the bin PALL is she throwing up again, that stupid bitch lets go mark or were going to be late EXT. PALLS ROAD Mark and Pall are walking down the street MARK So what where you up to in your room then? PALL Shut up, you faggot its none of your buisness. Pall punches Mark, he stumbles back and pretends it doesnt hurt. MARK (in a cowardly way) Why did you do that? They carry on walking down the street to school. EXT. COURTYARD.DAY Mark and Pall walk into to the courtyard of a private school, as they get closer they notice Paula. Paula notices them staring at her and her friends snigger. PALL What the fuck are you slags laughing at! Mark gets embarassed. The bells rings and everyone starts to leave except Paula and Pall. PALL (to mark) well go on then..piss off Mark looks hurt. he turns to Paula who smiles at him. Mark leaves. Pall watches him go then turns to Paula (CONTINUED)
  • 4. CONTINUED: 3. PALL Paula i wanna show you something PAULA Im busy, what do you want? PALL I wanna show you this picture i drew of you Pall pulls out the picture of her, she looks at it infront of him and doesnt know what to say. PAULA Why have you drawn a picture of me, are you stalking me? PALL (Offeneded) No... PAULA Your such a wierdo, why would i want this? Paula walks off leaving Pall standing. INT.CLASSROOM.DAY through the window of the classroom Mark watches as Pall leaves the courtyard. EXT. ROAD Pall is walking home really angrely, kicking dustbins overs PALL Fuck you god, what did i do wrong? Pall is struck by lightning and explodes leaving just his feet. EXT. GRAVEYARD Mark is standing upset at the funeral, a few people come up to him saying how Pall was such a nice guy. FUNERAL GUEST 1 O/S he was such a talent (CONTINUED)
  • 5. CONTINUED: 4. FUNERAL GUEST 2 O/S such a polite boy FUNERAL GUEST 3 O/S kind and caring he loved his mum poor soul The eulogies keep coming as we look at the blank expression on Marks face. INT. MARKS ROOM.DAY The calender in marks room has only one red mark on it. The Interview. INT. SCHOOL COMMON ROOM.DAY Mark goes to school the next day, Paula comes up to him PAULA Pall was such a nice boy, its such a shame. He had such potential. MARK what do you mean? PAULA his artwork it was truly amazing mark looks at her in a confused way. MARK oh, is this about that picture pall gave you? PAULA yes, it was really sweet MARK i probably shouldn’t tell you this now, but i drew that picture, for him. PAULA Oh... Ok well ill see you around. MARK Bye
  • 6. 5. INT. PALLS FLAT.NIGHT Mark goes to palls flat, rings on the bell. PALLS MUM what do you want? MARK i left some of my school books here, could i get them quickly PALLS MUM whatever, hurry up Palls mum stumbles back over to the sofa and doesnt take any notice of him. Mark picks up the box he noticed before. As he approaches the living room, he puts his head around the corner and sees Palls mum passed out on the sofa, he walks straight out. INT. ART SCHOOL. DAY Mark enters the room for his interview looking nervous. He notices two old people with glasses and suits looking very formal. INTERVIEWERS 1 Good afternoon, Mr. Burrows MARK Hello Mark shakes his hand and sits down INTERVIEWERS 2 So Mark why have you chosen to apply for ’London College of the Arts’? MARK Its always been my dream to come here, you have no idea how hard its been for me to come here. INTERVIEWERS 1 Could we possibly see your portfolio? (CONTINUED)
  • 7. CONTINUED: 6. MARK I have it here Mark hands them the portfolio, its a large book with pages hanging out and rough doodles on the front. INTERVIEWERS 2 Thank you Mark, could you please wait outside for a a couple of minute. INT. ART SCHOOL OFFICE. DAY Mark is sitting patiently, he leans back and rubs his eyes. As he moves his hands away he notices them coming out of the room, very impressed. They walk over to Mark INTERVIEWERS 1 Mark, we have looked over your work and would love to offer you a place at this college, your work is sensational. INTERVIEWERS 2 We would be honoured to offer you a place that our college, the college fees and infomation will be sent to your house. MARK Sorry, but how much are the fees? INTERVIEWERS 1 $9,500 a term MARK Ok well thank you, it was a pleasure Mark walks off thinking about how he is going to pay for the college. INT. SCHOOL COMMON ROOM.DAY mark walks in to the common room were his art teacher is sitting with a cup of tea (CONTINUED)
  • 8. CONTINUED: 7. MARK sir i wandering if you could do me a favour , i have got in to the London Collage Of the Arts TEACHER very well done mark im very proud of you , what was the favour you wanted MARK ya could you help me set up a gallary, kind of like an art show, its the only way i can pay the school fees TEACHER well i guess i could make a few calls i have a few friends that own gallarys MARK thank you soo much sir INT. MARK ROOM . EVENING Mark is looking threw the stolen art work and trying to decide what too show art show at that gallery. He puts toghter a few pictures and paintings he thinks are the best, and leaves to go to the art show. INT. GALLERY Mark is waiting around and no one is coming to his gallery except his art teacher. After a short while we see loads of his fellow students flooding through the door, after a short montage of him showing people his art. EXT. OUTSIDE GALLERY. NIGHT Paula approaches Mark who is having a cigarette PAULA Mark, i know that Pall did that picture of me... (CONTINUED)
  • 9. CONTINUED: 8. MARK Paula just fuck off, this is my big night i dont need you ruining it PAULA How can you do this to Pall he was your best mate MARK You, me and everyone hates that kid why are you sticking up for him now? PAULA What your doing is wrong! Mark walks off back towards the gallery, throwing his cigarette into the road angerly EXT. OUTSIDE GALLERY. NIGHT Mark is outside having a cigarette again, just about to go home. When he is approached by a man, wearing a suit and specs. ART DEALER Mark, i just want to congratulate you on your show it was truely inspiring. MARK Thank you sir, i worked hard for it ART DEALER I represent some very high up art collectors and i think they would be very interested in your work, i would like to give you an offer for the load. MARK Well, ofcourse thats amazing the art dealers says nothing, gets out a checkbook, scribbles on it and passes it to mark. We see the check says $2,000,000 ART DEALER I think that should surfice
  • 10. 9. EXT. PAULA’S FRONTDOOR. NIGHT Mark sprints up to Paulas door and pants then presses the buzzer. Paula opens the door PAULA what do you want Mark? MARK you where right the art work was Palls, but i have enough money for us to start a life toghter, im sorry but look Mark shows her the check MARK So what do you say, would you run away with me and leave this shithole PAULA what you want me pack my thing now and leave in the midlle of the night leave my hole life behind MARK il get you new things we can make a new life together PAULA paula grabs mark and kisses him MARK so i guess thats a yess