3. Definitions
• Empathy-being understanding of another’s pain or
anger or other emotions. It implies acceptance, but
doesn’t directly offer recognition of other’s values or
core beliefs. Derived from the Greek “en patheos”
meaning “in feeling” and is about shared
understanding of emotion.
• Respect – Pays full attention to who the other
person really is. The etymology of the word respect
is “recpectare”, or “respicere”, to “look again.” To
take another look, to reconsider, is to respect.
• Respect isn’t – about reflexive, politically
appropriate responses to social circumstance.
The word “respect” is misunderstood and
thereby undervalued.
4. What is RFT?
• RFT is a philosophy that simply states the tenets of
respect are an umbrella under which therapy can
open a pathway.
• Respect encompasses empathy, requiring it to exist,
yet goes far beyond empathy.
• Provides some guidelines for the narrative of
therapy to stay focused on the nurturing of genuine
respect.
• Helps direct the narrative, encourages clients to
explore and engage in own awareness of what
respect is or is not, gently aids that awareness move
in the direction of heightened respect.
5. Therapist Role
• Will provide an experience of respect for the
client that builds a pathway and stronger base of
respect for self & others.
• Maintains awareness of own bias & willingness
to suspend them in the therapeutic relationship.
• Recognition of power in the relationship.
• All of the above is an ongoing process.
6. Main Principles
• Focus on therapeutic relationship – deeper and
genuine within the context of therapy.
• Check our bias at the door – paying full attention to
who the other person really is.
• Non-pathologizing
• Supported by:
▫ Carl Roger’s Client-Centered Therapy
▫ Martin Buber’s I and Thou
▫ Brene Brown – Vulnerability and shame
▫ Alexandra Adame & Larry Leitner –Experiential
Personal Constructs Psychotherapy
8. Application in Therapy
• Works with multiple problems including
dependency, trauma, aggression, relationships,
grief, self-esteem.
• “Transpersonal reverence goes a step beyond
interpersonal relating and is defined as
reverence for humanity or the world at large”
(Adame & Leitner) – the ultimate goal of RFT.
• Works in hand with other theories, modalities,
and techniques.
9. What might RFT look like in session?
• Modeling by the therapist
• Validating their pain
• Talking about respect-respect-focused questions:
▫ What does it mean to the client?
▫ How do they show respect to themselves?
• Learn about their values
• Metaphors
• Storytelling
• Discussion that elicits thoughts or feelings about
being respected or not.
10. Case Study
• Symptoms of lack of respect shown
▫ Treatment by family (past and current)
▫ Persistent negative self talk (verbalized and thoughts)
▫ Treatment of physical self
▫ Expectations
• Interventions
▫ Validating the pain (family, job, romantic relationship)
▫ Learn about values
▫ Talk about respect
11. “Reverence implies awareness that the other is
‘holding my heart respectfully, treating my soul
gently, and seeing the decency behind my shame
and my retreats from others”
(Adame and Leitner, 2009, p.255)
