1. 50Cents
trinidad
Colorado
~
Vol. 138, No. 85
tuesday
april29,2014
APRIL 29
~Mammography Project
APRIL 29 (5:30 p.m.) A public meeting
will be held in the boardroom at the Mt. San
Rafael Hospital, 410 Benedicta Ave. to dis-
cuss this project and grant submission to the
USDA Information: 719-846-8053.
~Trinidad Schools
TUESDAY (6 m.) Board of Education will
hold a special meeting at the Middle School
Library, 614 Park St. Information: 719-846-
3324.
Today’s Quote
“Tell the truth, work hard, and
come to dinner on time.”
~Gerald R. Ford
APRIL 30
~Latin Golf Scholarship
APRIL 30 DEADLINE: Applications may
be picked up at all Las Animas County high
school counselor’s offices and at Chacon
Insurance, 125 E. Main St. High school and
college students are eligible. Sponsored by
the Trinidad Latin Golf Association. Informa-
tion: 719-846-9253.
~TSJC Nursing Job Fair
WEDNESDAY (9-11 a.m.) Trinidad
State Junior College will hold a free Nursing
Job Fair in the Pioneer Room of the Sullivan
Center on the TSJC campus. Information:
719-846-5530.
PUBLIC SERVICE
~Help Save the Veteran’s Post
URGENT: All interested parties who
would like to help the veterans save Trini-
dad’s local VFW Post 984 from closing,
please contact Commander John Rios at
719-846-6094. The Post is in desperate
need of caring individuals to champion this
organization that provides so many honor-
able benefits to the community.
~Free Fluoride Treatments
THURSDAY (9 a.m.-1 p.m.) Dr. Den-
nis Driscoll will be at the Las Animas County
Health Department, 412 Benedicta Ave., to
provide treatments to children age 1-year
and over. Appointments and information:
719-845-0463.
~Trinidad Children’s Chorale
THURSDAY (7 p.m.) The community is
invited to the annual spring concert “Trin-
Idol” to be presented at the Trinidad Middle
School Auditorium, 614 Park St. Information:
719-846-4411.
~Free Disposal Day/Spring Cleanup
SATURDAY (7 a.m.-4 p.m.) The City of
Trinidad Landfill, 2401 N. State Street will ac-
cept residential refuse without charge. Tires
will be assessed normal fees. Electronic
waste is excluded. Information: 719-846-
2538.
~9Health Fair
SATURDAY (7:30 a.m.-Noon) Annual
9Health Fair will be in the lobby of the Mt.
San Rafael Hospital, 410 Benedicta Ave. In-
formation: 719-846-8051.
~Benefit Yard Sale
SATURDAY (8 a.m.) New Hope Min-
istries will host a book, bake and yard sale
benefit fundraiser at the Old Wagon Wheel,
38096 Hwy 160, 2 miles east of Trinidad.
Proceeds benefit the church’s building proj-
ects. Information or donations: Lauri Duran,
719-846-8590.
~Aguilar Spring Cleanup
SATURDAY (8:30-11:30 a.m.) Second
annual event begins in the City Park with
barbecue lunch provided for volunteers after
the clean-up. Information: 719-941-4185.
~Lion’s Club Benefit
SATURDAY (9 a.m.-3 p.m. / Flea
Market & 4:30-7 p.m. Chili Supper) An-
nual fundraiser for the Lion’s Club charitable
projects will be held at the Izaak Walton
Building, 1900 Santa Fe Trail Drive. Interest-
ed vendors and information: Jack Maurer,
719-680-8510.
~Community Chorale
MAY 4 (4 p.m.) & MAY 5 (7 p.m.) The
public is invited to attend a free concert
“Hats Off to Broadway” that will be pre-
sented at the Methodist Church, 216 Broom
Street. Donations for the support of the cho-
rale are always appreciated.
~Raton PBW Scholarship
MAY 7 DEADLINE: A $500 scholarship
for continuing education is available to any
student or person in the work force in Colfax
County. Information: Diane Dixon, 575-445-
2713.
~Adopt a City Planter
MAY 9 DEADLINE: Individuals, or-
ganizations and businesses interested in
participating in the City’s “Adopt a Planter”
program, scheduled to run from May thru
September, can contact David Esquibel at
the Parks Dept., 719-846-7699.
~Calling all History Lovers
MAY-SEPTEMBER: Anyone interested
in volunteering for summer service at the
Santa Fe Trail Museum please contact Paula
Manini at 719-846-7217.
~ArtoCade 2014
CALLING ALL VOLUNTEERS: Anyone
interested in participating in the Cardango
Gala and all other events before and during
the annual ArtoCade Festival please contact
Rodney Wood at 719-334-0087 or artcar-
fun@yahoo.com.
theFineprint
WeatherWatCh
Tuesday: Partly sunny, with a high near
51. Breezy, with a north wind 15 to 20 mph.
Night: A 10 percent chance of showers before
midnight. Mostly cloudy, with a low around 29.
Blustery, with a north wind 15 to 20 mph de-
creasing to 10 to 15 mph after midnight.
Wednesday: A 10 percent chance of
showers after noon. Mostly cloudy, with a high
near 47. North wind 10 to 15 mph. Night: A
slight chance of rain showers. Mostly cloudy,
with a low around 31. N-NE wind 5 to 15 mph
becoming northwest after midnight. Chance of
precipitation is 20%.
Thursday: Mostly sunny, with a high near
51. North wind 5 to 15 mph. Night: Partly
cloudy, with a low around 34. N-NE wind 5 to
10 mph becoming W-SW after midnight.
Friday: A 10 percent chance of showers.
Mostly sunny, with a high near 62. West wind
5 to 10 mph becoming NE in the afternoon.
Night: A 10 percent chance of showers. Partly
cloudy, with a low around 39. NEwind around
5 mph becoming calm.
riverCall
Purgatoire River Call as of
04/28/2014. Hoehne ditch: Prior-
ity #20 -- Appropriation date:
10/07/1865.
Trinidad Reservoir Accounting:
Release 372.17 AF
Inflow 142.43 AF -- 71.81 CFS
Evaporation 14.26 AF
Content 18,357 AF
Elevation 6,182.32
Precipitation 0
Downstream River Call: High-
land Canal: 05/31/1866.
theChroniCleneWsEMPHASIZING SCIENCE & MATH
‘Girls in the Middle’
conference presents
career possibilitiesBy Steve Block
Working for the National
Weather Service is one of many re-
warding and challenging careers
that involve extensive knowledge
of math and science. That was
the message to approximately 100
middle school girls at Friday’s
third annual “Girls in the Middle”
conference held on the campus of
Trinidad State Junior College.
The conference was designed
to expose girls in sixth-, seventh-
and eighth
grades to
the career
experiences
of profes-
sional wom-
en working
in the areas
of science,
technology,
engineering,
t e c h n i c a l
e d u c a t i o n
and math.
The girls at-
tended two
workshops
in the morn-
ing and one
workshop in
the afternoon, sandwiched around
a hearty lunch, and every girl re-
ceived a free T-shirt. By examin-
ing these career possibilities, the
goal is for these young girls to
continue their studies in those dis-
ciplines through high school and
beyond.
The girls hailed from many dif-
ferent schools in Southern Colo-
rado and Northern New Mexico.
TSJC’s Lori Holdread served as
Mistress of Ceremonies. Holdread
has been a writer, educator and
visual artist for 25 years and cur-
rently serves as the TRIO Student
Support Services Coordinator at
TSJC’s Learning Center. She led
a workshop teaching the kids the
visual journaling process as a
stimulus for self-awareness and
creativity.
Jennifer Jirous was the key-
note speaker at the conference.
Jirous serves as the STEM/Arts/
IT Program Director at the Colo-
rado Community College System
in Denver. She has given presen-
tations at many state and national
conferences on equity, effective
leadership, current trends in in-
dustry and education and career
pathways.
The National Weather Service
(NWS) had three presenters at the
conference, including Kathy To-
gerson, Jennifer Stark and Peggy
Perales. They all work out of the
Pueblo office as part of an office
staff of 22 people. Stark leads the
office team, and she told the kids
to take every math and science
class they could in middle school
and continue that pat-
tern through high school.
She said her 21 years of
experience working for
the NWS had convinced
her that early exposure
to math and science was
critical to anyone who
wanted to be an NWS me-
teorologist. A Colorado
native, she graduated
from Ames Community
College and the Univer-
sity of Northern Colora-
do. She said she learned
about the importance of
multi-tasking early in
her NWS career in Des
Moines, Iowa as a weath-
er forecaster. She later worked
for the NWS in Topeka, Kansas
as an early coordinator, before
transferring to the Pueblo office
in 2009. She said the terrible fires
and floods that plagued Colorado’s
Front Range in the summer of 2013
Steve Block / The Chronicle-News
National Weather Service experts used specialized equipment to demonstrate
various weather conditions and how they were created at Friday’s “Girls in the
Middle” conference at Trinidad State Junior College.
Continued on Page 2 ...
VETERANS’ HEALTH CARE
Big crowd celebrates Grand Opening of Raton’s new VA Clinic
By Steve Block
On a sun-splashed Friday in
South Raton, a crowd estimated at
200 people celebrated the opening
of the new Raton Veterans Admin-
istration (VA) Community Based
Outpatient Clinic, located at 1493
Whittier St. Services offered at the
clinic include primary care, pri-
mary mental-health care and labo-
ratory work, and other services
are being expanded at the clinic
through telemedicine.
Dignitaries at the ceremony in-
cluded both of New Mexico’s U.S.
Senators, Tom Udall and Martin
Heinrich, U.S. Representative Ben
Ray Lujan, Raton Mayor Sandy
Mantz and the Director of the
Veterans Integrated Service Net-
work 18 (VISN
18), Susan P.
Bowers. The
Director of
the New Mex-
ico VA Health
Care System,
George Mar-
nell, served as
Master of Cer-
emonies.
The new
clinic covers
6,591 square
feet, more
than double
the size of the
clinic it re-
places at the
nearby Dona
Ana Shopping
Center, and
the new facil-
ity features
46 parking
spaces. The
clinic serves
approximate-
ly 1,200 Veterans from Northeast
New Mexico and Southeast Colo-
rado. They come to the clinic from
as far west as Red River in New
Mexico’s northern mountains and
from along the borders with Texas
and Oklahoma. The clinic also
sees Veterans from as far north as
Walsenburg, Colorado and as far
south as Mora, New Mexico.
Two Trinidad-based physi-
cians work at the clinic. Dr. Sally
Fabec is the only fulltime doctor at
the clinic, and Dr. David Serafini
splits his time between the Raton
Veteran’s Clinic and the medical
clinic at Trinidad’s Mt. Carmel
Health, Wellness and Community
Center. Dr. Fabec spent part of her
medical career as a physician at
Mt. San Rafael Hospital.
“I love my Veterans,” Dr. Fa-
bec said. “I miss my patients up
in Trinidad, but I love my Vets.
This facility is very badly needed.
They promised six years ago when
I started here that they would have
it. Now it’s here and it’s a reality.”
Speaking of the area’s Veterans
whom he had provided service to,
Dr. Serafini said, “It runs the gam-
ut. It’s all of the health-care issues,
but it’s also
the men-
tal health
i s s u e s .
We’re still
out here,
and I like
to say it’s
the price
you pay for
living in
this beauti-
ful part of
the world.
We’re a
long way
from the
front office,
so with a
lot of the
s u r g i c a l
stuff you
just have to
go down to
Albuquer-
que, and
that’s just
how it’s go-
ing to be. We’re going to be able
to do more telemedicine, with the
neurology and other health issues,
and we’ll be able to offer more ser-
vices with this facility.”
Serafini is a U.S. Navy veteran,
having joined the service in 1995.
He still spends some of his time
in the Naval Reserves, along with
still seeing some active duty. He
said that using assessment tools is
a key part of what he and the other
health-care providers do to help
Veterans at the clinic.
“We assess them and we treat
what we can,” he said. “We’re do-
ing more and it’s sort of a general
medicine. Obviously, we can’t do
surgery, other than for some mi-
nor skin problems and things
like that. Diabetes, hypertension,
hyperthyroid, coughs, colds and
pneumonias are the issues we’re
dealing with. Between the two doc-
tors, we’re probably seeing about
150 patients a week. There are a
lot of just plain nurse visits, too.
We’re mostly primary-care physi-
cians.”
Dr.PhilWagner,associatechief
of staff for ambulatory care of the
state VA Health Care System, is in
charge of the clinic, and Charlene
Stolar is the clinic manager. Shat-
terbone Enterprises of Pinetop,
Arizona was the general contrac-
tor/developer of the construction
project, and several local contrac-
tors and construction workers
were hired to work on the project.
The posting of the colors on
Friday was handled in fine style
by the Honor Guard of Raton’s
VFW Post 1793, while the Willow
Springs singers offered a fine ren-
dition of “The Star-Spangled Ban-
ner.”
Sen. Udall asked the Veterans
who were present to stand and be
recognized for their service to the
nation, and they received a rous-
ing round of applause.
“All of these men and women
here today — we wouldn’t be
the country that we are without
them,” Sen. Udall said. “We love
them. We acknowledge them, and
we thank them for their service. I
particularly want to recognize one
of the Veterans here in town that’s
been such an advocate for Veter-
ans and Veteran health care, and
that has been Brigadier General
Gene Sisneros (U.S. Army–Ret.).
Gene, I want to thank you for all
your hard work and I really ap-
preciate it.… When we talk about
tele-health, this is something very
new. It’s just been coming on in
the last few years, and it allows
us to give care in such a way that
a Veteran here can get the world’s
Steve Block / The Chronicle-News
Military-service veterans, above, stand to be honored by the large crowd at
the Grand Opening of Raton’s new regional VA clinic on Friday. U.S. Sen. Tom
Udall, left, describes to the crowd the six-year process required to plan and to
build the new VA clinic.
Continued on Page 2 ...

2. Page 2 Tuesday, April 29, 2014 The Chronicle-News Trinidad, Colorado
General Manager
Allyson Sheumaker
asheumaker@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Advertising
Sales-Adam Sperandio
advertising@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Classified- Kyla Clark
classified@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Design & Legals- Krysta Toci
ktoci@trinidadchroniclenews.com
News Room
Editor: Bruce Leonard
editor@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Features Editor & Fine Print
Catherine Moser
cathy@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Reporter: Steve Block
news1@trinidadchroniclenews.com
Circulation: Kaylee Reorda
circulation@trinidadchroniclenews.com
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had been one of the tough-
est challenges of her ca-
reer.
The NWS works under
the authority of the Nation-
al Oceanic and Atmospher-
icAdministration(NOAA),
and Peggy Perales said the
NWS weather forecasters
incorporate a lot of NOAA
data in their work. Perales
served in the U.S Navy and
as a civilian employee of
the federal Department of
Defense, before beginning
her NWS career. She has
lived in Alaska, Spain, Ja-
pan and on a Pacific island
during her long career.
She told the girls at the
conference that the NWS
had 122 offices around the
world, offering plenty of
opportunities for reloca-
tion to interesting and ex-
citing places for a profes-
sional meteorologist. She
works in the area of public-
service data collection at
NWS’s Pueblo office.
Kathy Togerson studied
meteorology at the Univer-
sity of Oklahoma’s Nation-
al Severe Storms Center.
The Center’s personnel de-
veloped “Toto,” a machine
that sends sensors directly
into a tornado’s vortex, in
an effort to discover how
tornados form and how
they work.
Stark said last sum-
mer’s fires and floods re-
quired NWS personnel to
work closely with meteo-
rologists at regional me-
dia outlets to disseminate
information about danger-
ous environmental condi-
tions that could threaten
the safety of people and
property. She said media
had interviewed her mul-
tiple times when weather
conditions threatened pub-
lic safety.
The NWS workshop
broke up into several
teaching groups, with the
NWS experts showing the
girls at the conference
how clouds formed, which
weather conditions could
create lightning and other
interesting presentations
about the technical and
challenging work done by
meteorologists.
Many other workshops
were held during the day-
longconference.JoniStein-
er of Earth Mountain Farm
presented information
about sustainable agricul-
ture, and TSJC’s Shannon
Shively, Krystalee Moreno
and Jenn Swanson led the
biology workshop. Other
workshops led by TSJC
presenters included Sarah
Sloane on Criminal Justice
and Lori Rae Hamilton,
Santina Frank and Kathy
Carpenter on the work-
ing world of nursing. The
Geology and Engineering
workshop was led by Pio-
neer Natural Resource’s
Shannon Osterhout, Man-
di Engebretson and Jackie
Luther, and Lorri Arnhold
of Colorado State Univer-
sity Extension presented
information about Food
Science.
Workshops were also
held on potential careers in
cardiovascular physiology,
medicine, veterinary sci-
ence, wildlife management
and aquatic biology.
The Girls in the Middle
conference gave young
girls the chance to come
together at TSJC to learn
what it would take to have
a professional career, and
how rewarding and fulfill-
ing such a career could be.
‘Girls in the Middle’ conference ... Continued from Page 1
expert on a screen and be
able to get a diagnosis and
be able to move forward.
The fact that we’re putting
this technology in here
means that these veterans
are going to get the very best
level of care, which is what
they deserve.”
Sisneros was asked to
come forward and say a few
words about the long, six-
year struggle to bring the
new clinic to the region.
“Thank all of you for be-
ing here,” Sisneros said.
“This has been a total group
effort from the feds, the
state and from everybody.
Anything is possible when
we set our minds and hearts
to it, but it takes all of us.
The folks who stayed home
when the Veterans went
to war — they hold down
the fort and they take care
of our Veterans when they
come back home.… This
has been a long time com-
ing, and now it’s here.”
U.S. Representative Ben
Ray Lujan (D-N.M.), who
represents northeastern
New Mexico, talked about
the process of bringing the
clinic to Raton and its im-
portance to area Veterans.
“It’s good to be with you
today, and with so many
heroes from our communi-
ties,” Rep. Lujan said. “So
many voices that made sure
that you’d never let them be
silenced in speaking up for
your brothers and sisters in
arms, for their spouses, for
their children, for the gener-
ations that are going to con-
tinue to serve us for years to
come, to make sure that in
rural New Mexico, here in
Raton and in Colfax Coun-
ty, that a promise that was
made was a promise that
was going to be kept. It was
because of your unwaver-
ing commitment that we’re
here today. For the example
you’ve set for each and ev-
ery one of us, I want to say
thank you. There’s not a
time I talk to Gen. Sisneros
that he doesn’t remind me
of the importance of getting
this done. General, we’re
looking forward to your tell-
ing us what the next project
is going to be.”
New Mexico’s congres-
sional delegation presented
a special honorary flag that
they requested be flown
above the clinic in the glori-
ous sunny skies of northern
New Mexico.
Raton’s new VA Clinic
... Continued from Page 1
Rose C. Sanchez
Rose C. Sanchez, former
resident of Aguilar, Colo,
passed away April 26, 2014
in Wisconsin. She was 94.
Funeral Services will be
Sunday, May 4, 2014 at 3PM
at the Comi Chapel.
Graveside services with
Rite of Committal will be
Monday, May 5, 2014 at
9AM at Trinidad Catholic
Cemetery, with Bro Harry
Gonzales officiating.
Complete obit to follow.
Arrangements made under
the direction of the Comi
Funeral Home.
Larry J. Zappanti Sr.
Larry J. Zappanti Sr., age
6 0 , p a s s e d a w a y
unexpectedly at home on
April 22, 2014.
Visitation will be Thursday,
from 3PM-6PM at the Comi
Chapel.
Rosary will be Thursday,
May 1, 2014, at 7PM at the
Comi Chapel.
Funeral Mass will be Friday
May 2, 2014 at 10AM at Holy
Trinity Church.
Interment will follow in Bon
Carbo.
Complete obituary to
follow.
Arrangements made under
the direction of the Comi
Funeral Home.
Dora Ann Sandri
Dora Ann Sandri, former
Trinidad resident, passed
away in Pueblo, Colorado on
April 26, 2014 at the age of
95.
Funeral Services will be
Monday May 5, 2014 with
Rosary at Noon at the Comi
Chapel, followed by the
Funeral Mass a 1PM at Holy
Trinity Church.
Inurnment will follow at the
Trinidad Catholic Cemetery.
Complete obituary to
follow.
Arrangements made under
the direction of the Comi
Funeral Home.
Evelyn J. Casias
Evelyn J. Casias, age 67,
passed away at home on
April 22, 2014 after a lengthy
illness.
Visitation will be Monday
from 3PM-6Pm at the Comi
Chapel.
Rosary will be Monday
April 28th at 7PM. at Holy
Trinity Church with Funeral
Mass Services on Tuesday,
April 29, 2014 at 10AM. at
Holy Trinity Church.
Interment will follow at the
Trinidad Catholic Cemetery.
Arrangements made under
the care and direction of the
Comi Funeral Home.
Joe Jesus Gonzales
Joe Jesus Gonzales, age
87, passed away at home on
April 22, 2014 due to a long
illness.
Rosary will be Tuesday,
April 29, 2014 at 7PM at
Holy Trinity Church.
Funeral Mass will be
Wednesday, April 30 2014 at
10AM at Holy Trinity Church.
Interment with Rite of
Committal will follow at the
Trinidad Catholic Cemetery.
Arrangements made under
the direction of the Comi
Funeral Home.
John Gregg Murnane III
John Gregg Murnane III,
"John John" passed away
unexpectedly on April 25,
2014. He was 20.
Visitation will be Monday,
May 5, 2014 from 3PM-7PM
at the Comi Chapel.
Funeral Services will be
Tuesday, May 6, 2014 a
10AM at the First Christian
Church with Pastor Cary
Nelson officiating.,
Cremation to follow with
private family inturnment at a
later date.
Complete obituary to
follow.
Arrangements made under
the direction of the Comi
Funeral Home.
Associated Press
NEW YORK (AP) — Passengers
beware: More airline fees are on their
way.
Another airline is promising to
change the way we fly by offering
cheap base fares but then adding on
a bevy of additional fees. Passengers
flying Frontier Airlines will now have
to pay extra to place carry-on bags in
the overhead bin or for advance seat
assignments.
The move comes as the Denver-
based airline tries to transform itself
into a fee-dependent airline, similar to
Spirit Airlines or Allegiant Air — the
only other U.S. carriers to charge such
fees. Frontier already charges $1.99 for
soda and bottled water on its flights, a
fee it added on July 1.
Frontier says that in exchange for
these new fees, it is lowering its base
fare by an average of 12 percent. The
new charges apply to tickets pur-
chased on or after Monday.
Frontier carries 8.4 million passen-
gers a year, about 1 percent of the over-
all traffic flown by U.S. airlines.
There is no indication that larger
carriers like American Airlines, Delta
Air Lines, Southwest Airlines or Unit-
ed Airlines are considering such fees.
Frontier’s fee for using the over-
head bin ranges from $20 for frequent
fliers who book online to $50 for those
who fail to pay before getting to the
gate. Most will pay $25 if they check-in
online; $35 if they check-in at the air-
port. Frontier previously only charged
a fee for carry-on bags to people who
booked the cheapest tickets through
third-party sites like Expedia and Orb-
itz. Monday’s change applies to every-
body except those booking the most
expensive fares.
Personal items fitting under the
seat remains free.
That’s in addition to the $15 to $25
fliers will pay for their first checked
bag.
Additionally, seat assignments —
even for the dreaded middle seat —
now cost an extra $3 for those who buy
while booking online; $8 at check-in. If
passengers don’t pay extra, Frontier
will assign them whatever seats are
left over.
Frontier is also following the model
of other airlines in charging extra for
seats with more legroom or just those
closer to the front of the plane.
For “select” seats, which are just in
thefronthalfoftheplane,Frontierwill
charge an extra $5 to $15 per flight, de-
pending on when they are purchased.
“Stretch” seats with an extra 5 to 7
inches of legroom — including those
in the exit row — will cost $15 to $50
per flight segment, depending on the
distance flown. Connecting passen-
gers would have to pay each fee twice.
Passengers who buy more-expen-
sive, fully-refundable “Classic Plus”
fares will get stretch seats for free as
well as one checked back and one free
carry-on bag. Similar benefits will be
given for free to elite members of Fron-
tier’s frequent flier program.
In December, a struggling Frontier
was purchased by Indigo Partners
LLC, a private equity firm that has
revamped several near-bankrupt air-
lines by changing their business mod-
el. One of its latest turnarounds was
Spirit, based in Miramar, Fla. Just last
week, Frontier named Barry L. Biffle
as its new president. Biffle had spent
nearly nine year working as chief
marking officer of Spirit.
“Frontier is merely copying Spirit,
reflecting its investment by Indigo,”
said Henry Harteveldt, an airline ana-
lyst. “I’m not surprised that the airline
is doing this.”
Associated Press
Frontier Airlines now charging for carry-on bags
INCREASED TRAVEL EXPENSES
DEAR ABBY: My hus-
band and I have been mar-
ried for three years and
have two beautiful children.
Shortly before our first
c h i l d
w a s
b o r n ,
my in-
l a w s
bought
a new
camera.
T h e y
bring it
along to
e v e r y
v i s i t
and con-
stantly take pictures of all of
us. Neither my husband nor
I likes having our pictures
taken. My in-laws have
thousands of pictures of all
of us already.
The biggest problem is
that they don’t have a rela-
tionship with their grand-
children because of this.
They complain that the kids
“don’t like them.” They feel
they should therefore visit
more often, but in reality,
these visits consist of non-
stop photo-snapping, and no
quality time is spent with
either of the children. How
do I make this stop without
causing problems? -- OUT
OF FOCUS IN NEW YORK
DEAR OUT OF FOCUS:
A diplomatic approach
would be to suggest to your
in-laws that they “shoot”
only for a limited time
when they visit -- no longer
than the first 10 minutes.
Explain that you realize the
kids are growing and chang-
ing quickly, and you under-
stand their desire to record
all of it, but the children
need a deeper kind of inter-
action with their grandpar-
ents in order to form a posi-
tive bond with them. Then
suggest some ways they can
relate to the little ones after
the camera is put away.
If they balk, tell them the
reason their grandchildren
don’t seem to like them is
that children need face-to-
face and eye contact, and
the camera has prevented it
from happening. If they’re
smart, they’ll listen.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a
43-year-old woman who has
been in a relationship with
a man I dated many years
ago, “Charles.” When we re-
connected three years ago,
I had a dog, “Frosty.” One
year into the relationship,
Charles asked me to get rid
of Frosty because he thinks
dogs are unsanitary. I loved
Frosty and kept him, but it
caused all kinds of problems
with my boyfriend.
When Charles and I
moved in together three
months ago, he insisted I
get rid of Frosty and I caved.
I miss my little friend so
much it hurts. Memories
of him are everywhere. I
am able to get him back,
but is it crazy that I would
jeopardize my relationship
because I want to keep my
dog? -- IN THE DOGHOUSE
DEAR IN THE DOG-
HOUSE: I don’t think it’s
crazy, and I’m sure my an-
imal-loving readers -- who
number in the millions
-- would agree with me.
People bond with their pets
to such an extent that in the
event of a natural disaster,
some of them refuse to be
separated from their com-
panions.
That Charles would in-
sist you get rid of Frosty
shows extreme insensitiv-
ity for your feelings, in ad-
dition to disregard for your
beloved pet in whom you
had a significant emotional
investment. Could Charles
be jealous of the affection
you have shown Frosty?
Not knowing him, I can’t
guess. But if you are forced
to choose between the two of
them, you should seriously
consider choosing the dog.
Dear Abby is written by
Abigail Van Buren, also
known as Jeanne Phillips,
and was founded by her
mother, Pauline Phillips.
Write Dear Abby at www.
DearAbby.com or P.O. Box
69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Abby shares more than
100 of her favorite recipes in
two booklets: “Abby’s Fa-
vorite Recipes” and “More
Favorite Recipes by Dear
Abby.” Send your name and
mailing address, plus check
or money order for $14 (U.S.
funds) to: Dear Abby, Cook-
booklet Set, P.O. Box 447,
Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447.
(Shipping and handling are
included in the price.)
PHOTO-HAPPY GRANDPARENTS NEED TO CHANGE THEIR VIEW