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Communication Styles-1.ppt

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Communication Styles-1.ppt

  1. 1. Communication Styles: Passive, Assertive, Aggressive
  2. 2. Communications Styles Goals for Today  Understand different communication styles and how they affect others  Practice recognizing and crafting messages in different styles  Learn about assertiveness skills
  3. 3. Communications Styles Have you ever dealt with a difficult person?
  4. 4. Communications Styles It’s all about respect Passive No Respect for Self Assertive Respect for Self & Others Aggressive No Respect for Others
  5. 5. Communications Styles How about…? Can’t speak up
  6. 6. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up
  7. 7. Communications Styles How about…? Loud
  8. 8. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Loud
  9. 9. Communications Styles How about…? Firm
  10. 10. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Firm Loud
  11. 11. Communications Styles How about…? Don’t know my rights
  12. 12. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Loud
  13. 13. Communications Styles How about…? Direct
  14. 14. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Direct Loud
  15. 15. Communications Styles How about…? Bossy
  16. 16. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Direct Loud Bossy
  17. 17. Communications Styles How about…? Honest
  18. 18. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Direct Honest Loud Bossy
  19. 19. Communications Styles How about…? Pushy
  20. 20. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Direct Honest Loud Bossy Pushy
  21. 21. Communications Styles How about…? Respect rights of others
  22. 22. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy
  23. 23. Communications Styles How about…? Get stepped on
  24. 24. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy
  25. 25. Communications Styles How about…? Meek
  26. 26. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy
  27. 27. Communications Styles How about…? Dominating
  28. 28. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating
  29. 29. Communications Styles How about…? Intimidating
  30. 30. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating
  31. 31. Communications Styles How about…? Too accommodating
  32. 32. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating
  33. 33. Communications Styles How about…? Violate others’ rights using power, position & language
  34. 34. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language
  35. 35. Communications Styles How about…? Talks softly
  36. 36. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language
  37. 37. Communications Styles How about…? Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected
  38. 38. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language
  39. 39. Communications Styles How about…? Must get my way
  40. 40. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way
  41. 41. Communications Styles How about…? Gives “cold fish” handshakes
  42. 42. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way
  43. 43. Communications Styles How about…? Don’t stand up for my rights
  44. 44. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way
  45. 45. Communications Styles How about…? React instantly
  46. 46. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly
  47. 47. Communications Styles How about…? Avoid conflicts
  48. 48. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly
  49. 49. Communications Styles How about…? Confident
  50. 50. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly
  51. 51. Communications Styles How about…? Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  52. 52. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  53. 53. Communications Styles How about…? Realize I have choices
  54. 54. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  55. 55. Communications Styles How about…? Effective communicator
  56. 56. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  57. 57. Communications Styles How about…? People take advantage of me
  58. 58. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  59. 59. Communications Styles How about…? Can express my needs
  60. 60. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone
  61. 61. Communications Styles How about…? Can be abusive
  62. 62. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive
  63. 63. Communications Styles How about…? Vise-like handshake
  64. 64. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive Vise-like handshake
  65. 65. Communications Styles How about…? Make good eye contact
  66. 66. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Make good eye contact Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive Vise-like handshakes
  67. 67. Communications Styles How about…? I like to get even
  68. 68. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Make good eye contact Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive Vise-like handshake I like to get even
  69. 69. Communications Styles How about…? Speak with firm voice
  70. 70. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Make good eye contact Speak with firm voice Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive Vise-like handshake I like to get even
  71. 71. Communications Styles How about…? Trouble saying “no,” then I’m angry and resentful
  72. 72. Communications Styles Communication Styles Passive Assertive Aggressive Can’t speak up Don’t know my rights Get stepped on Meek Too accommodating Talks softly Gives “cold fish” handshakes Don’t stand up for my rights Avoid conflicts People take advantage of me Trouble saying “no,” then I’m angry and resentful Firm Direct Honest Respect rights of others Recognize the importance of having my needs & rights respected Confident Realize I have choices Effective communicator Can express my needs Make good eye contact Speak with firm voice Loud Bossy Pushy Dominating Intimidating Violate others’ rights using power, position & language Must get my way React instantly Don’t care where or when I “blast” someone Can be abusive Vise-like handshake I like to get even
  73. 73. Communications Styles Passive Style: Summary  Too intimidated to express thoughts and feelings  Forfeits his/her rights or freedoms  Gives in to demands so he/she will be accepted  Avoid confrontation at any cost  Often feels used and taken advantage of  Driven by anxiety
  74. 74. Communications Styles Assertive Style: Summary  Recognizes and stands up for own rights while respecting the dignity of others  Focuses on specific issues and problems, without belittling self or others  Expresses opinion without violating others’ rights  Minimizes opportunities to be taken advantage of by others
  75. 75. Communications Styles Assertive Style: Summary  Open, tolerant, and considerate of other’s feelings  Can overcome fear to confront issues that require resolutions  Can communicate feelings of anger diplomatically, without putting others on the defensive
  76. 76. Communications Styles Aggressive Style: Summary  Intimidates others to gain control of their thoughts and actions  Manipulates, accuses, fights  Little or no regard for other’s feelings  Driven by anger
  77. 77. Communications Styles Passive-aggressiveness  Hostility expressed through inaction; inertia used as a weapon  Silent treatment  Dragging your feet  Always being late  Never saying what they want to do, then sulking about it  Lame excuses  Plausible deniability is key
  78. 78. Communications Styles ROLE PLAY  Scenario 1: Need two volunteers  Scenario 2: Need three volunteers
  79. 79. Communications Styles Assertiveness Skills  Know your rights  Say no and not feel guilty  Change your mind about anything  Take your time to form a response to a comment or question  Ask for assistance with instructions or directions  Ask for what you want  Experience and express your feelings  Feel positive about yourself under any conditions  Make mistakes without feeling embarrassed or guilty  Own your opinions and convictions  Protest unfair treatment or criticism  Be recognized for your significant achievements and contributions From Davis, Eshelmann, and McKay (1988)
  80. 80. Communications Styles Assertiveness Skills  Learn to say no  Learn to use “I” statements  Use eye contact  Use assertive body language  Avoid manipulation  Be aware of these strategies  Intimidation  Content substitution  Personal attacks (character assassination)  Avoidance  Know your rights
  81. 81. Communications Styles Assertiveness Skills  Know your rights  Learn to say no  Learn to use “I” statements  Use eye contact  Use assertive body language  Avoid manipulation  Respond rather than react  Exercise
  82. 82. Communications Styles Your difficult person  What communication style do they use?  How does it make you feel?  How will you change your reaction to them?
  83. 83. Communications Styles Communication is two-way What questions do you have??
  84. 84. Communications Styles Evaluation Questions Use: A. Strongly agree B. Agree C. Disagree D. Strongly disagree E. Don’t know 1. I found the presentation of material easy to understand. 2. This Advantage session increased my knowledge on the subject presented. 3. I will be able to use some of the information from this Advantage session in the future. 4. The presenter was well prepared for this Advantage session. 5. This presentation should be repeated in future semesters. #13 Tuesday, Sept. 28

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