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A CURIOUS PRESENTATION CONCERNING MALWARE Shaun Hargreaves presents... PROPERTY OF QUERKMACHINE INTERNATIONAL 2010
MALWAREIS A COMPOSITE WORD Malicious Software Malware =
MALWARE IS BAD
MALWARE IS AN IMMIGRANT Most of it comes from China. You know what those people get up to, those things aren’t natural. Shaoxing
MALWAREIS A MASTER OF DISGUISE Viruses Worms Rootkits Spyware Trojans
MALWAREUSED TO BE HARMLESS People wrote viruses for laughs. Some of them still do, in fact. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
MALWAREIS ARMED AND DANGEROUS If you come into contact with malware, you should contact your local anti-virus software and under no circumstances try to approach or reason with it. Tom Jeremy Dick
BANG! KER MALWAREDOESN’T LIKE THE DOCTOR
MALWAREIS QUITE OLD The first piece of malware to operate over the Internet was the “Internet Worm” (what an imaginative name) in 1988. It nearly killed the Internet, you know. Before that, malware was spread by infecting floppy disks and other such things of that kind. You know.
MALWAREIS ONE SMART BASTARD It can make your computer turn into anything from a zombie to a brick. Bet you can’t do that.
MALWARECAN HAVE PUPPIES PUPs (or Greyware) are programs that aren’t malware, but are still undesirable, thus PUP – potentially unwanted program. For example, adware doesn’t do anything but serve pop-ups. But it’s still pissing annoying and hard to get rid of. (LIKE NORTON ANTI-VIRUS...) Not a PUP
MALWAREDID 9/11 It didn’t really, but fearmongering is a good way to get stuff done.  George Bush taught me that.
MALWAREIS MALWARE IS MALWARE Sometimes malware comes with malware. Trojans can contain adware, which in turn have spyware installed with them. Fuck...
THE END PROPERTY OF QUERKMACHINE INTERNATIONAL 2010

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Malware

  • 1. A CURIOUS PRESENTATION CONCERNING MALWARE Shaun Hargreaves presents... PROPERTY OF QUERKMACHINE INTERNATIONAL 2010
  • 2. MALWAREIS A COMPOSITE WORD Malicious Software Malware =
  • 4. MALWARE IS AN IMMIGRANT Most of it comes from China. You know what those people get up to, those things aren’t natural. Shaoxing
  • 5. MALWAREIS A MASTER OF DISGUISE Viruses Worms Rootkits Spyware Trojans
  • 6. MALWAREUSED TO BE HARMLESS People wrote viruses for laughs. Some of them still do, in fact. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
  • 7. MALWAREIS ARMED AND DANGEROUS If you come into contact with malware, you should contact your local anti-virus software and under no circumstances try to approach or reason with it. Tom Jeremy Dick
  • 8. BANG! KER MALWAREDOESN’T LIKE THE DOCTOR
  • 9. MALWAREIS QUITE OLD The first piece of malware to operate over the Internet was the “Internet Worm” (what an imaginative name) in 1988. It nearly killed the Internet, you know. Before that, malware was spread by infecting floppy disks and other such things of that kind. You know.
  • 10. MALWAREIS ONE SMART BASTARD It can make your computer turn into anything from a zombie to a brick. Bet you can’t do that.
  • 11. MALWARECAN HAVE PUPPIES PUPs (or Greyware) are programs that aren’t malware, but are still undesirable, thus PUP – potentially unwanted program. For example, adware doesn’t do anything but serve pop-ups. But it’s still pissing annoying and hard to get rid of. (LIKE NORTON ANTI-VIRUS...) Not a PUP
  • 12. MALWAREDID 9/11 It didn’t really, but fearmongering is a good way to get stuff done. George Bush taught me that.
  • 13. MALWAREIS MALWARE IS MALWARE Sometimes malware comes with malware. Trojans can contain adware, which in turn have spyware installed with them. Fuck...
  • 14. THE END PROPERTY OF QUERKMACHINE INTERNATIONAL 2010