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265 d-tmhs
265 d-tmhs
The Three Types of
Education in Human Sexuality
(1) Education in chastity;
(2) Biological sex education (“organ
recital”); and
(3) Comprehensive sex education.
265 d-tmhs
Elements of Biological Sex Education
(1) Biological facts about human reproduction;
(2) Information on sexual development;
(3) Information on preventing sexual abuse.
Elements of Comprehensive Sex Education
(1) Biological facts about human reproduction;
(2) Information on sexual development;
(3) Information on preventing sexual abuse;
(4) Comprehensive birth control information;
(5) Information on abortion and how to obtain
them; and
(6) “Values clarification,” lifeboat exercises, etc.
Messages of Comprehensive Sex Education
• “Do your own thing.”
• “If it feels good, do it.”
• “You can't really help yourself because
you are a sexual being.”
• “If [when] you have sex, that is all right.
Nobody will judge you. Just be
responsible and use a condom.”
• “Nobody can judge you or what you do.”
• “It’s all about freedom!”
265 d-tmhs
"Young people's sexuality is still
contentious for many religious institutions.
Fundamentalist and other religious groups
— the Catholic Church and madrasas
(Islamic Schools) for example — have
imposed tremendous barriers that prevent
young people, particularly, from obtaining
information and services related to sex
and reproduction. Currently, many
religious teachings deny the pleasurable
and positive aspects of sex."
265 d-tmhs
What Are They Thinking?
"Young people have the right to be fully
informed about sexuality and to have
access to contraceptives and other
services. These rights are enshrined in
various internationally agreed human rights
convention and treaties, but —
unfortunately — they are still not universally
respected."
—Bert Koenders of the Development
Cooperation of the Netherlands.
“It's far more difficult to respond to
completely ignorant broadsides than to well
informed criticisms. … Planned Parenthood
speaks here and elsewhere without even a
glancing familiarity with a single primary
text about human sexuality authored by the
Catholic Church.”
— Helen Alvaré, consultant to the
Pontifical Council for the Laity.
Why Are Ten Years of
Sex Education Necessary?
• Systematic Behavioral Modification (SBM),
i.e. slow brainwashing.
• “Make up your own minds about important
things.”
• “You don’t need to tell anyone anything; your
privacy is paramount.”
• Makes a pliable “good citizen” who can be
more easily controlled by the power
structures if given benefits.
What is Sexuality?
"... sexuality is not something purely
biological, rather it concerns the intimate
nucleus of the person.”
— TMHS, ¶3.
What is Chastity?
“Chastity is the spiritual power which
frees love from selfishness and
aggression.”
— TMHS, 16-21.
Chastity Education
• Requires the most preparation.
• Is the most difficult to teach because it is
countercultural and works against man's fallen
nature.
• To be most effective, it must be carefully tailored
to the needs and personality of each child.
• Therefore, the parents of each child are the most
appropriate chastity educators.
Chastity Education
• Parents are sometimes nervous because they
think they have to give an organ recital and
because they believe that they are not qualified
as educators. On the contrary, they are the only
ones properly qualified to teach their own
children.
• Chastity education must be part of a lifestyle
taught by people who live moral lives, and who
present it as a part of an integrated program on
Christian living throughout all 12 years of grade
and high school. Chastity is not taught, it is
caught.
Chastity: Lead by Example!
“Contracepting parents
beget fornicating
teenagers.”
–– Father Paul Marx,
Founder of HLI.
Chastity: Lead by Example!
“Contracepting parents
beget fornicating
teenagers.”
–– Father Paul Marx,
Founder of HLI.
General Principles for Teaching
Chastity (TMHS, ¶65-76)
• Each child is a unique and unrepeatable
person and must receive individualized
formation.
• The moral dimension of sexuality must
always be part of the parent's explanations.
• Formation in chastity and timely information
regarding sexuality must be provided in the
broadest context of education for love.
• Parents should provide information with
great delicacy, with clarity, and at the
appropriate time.
265 d-tmhs
Is Chastity Education "Oppressive?"
Is Chastity Education "Oppressive?"
"If the person is not master of self — through the
virtues and, in a concrete way, through chastity —
he or she lacks that self possession which makes‑
self giving possible. Chastity is the spiritual‑
power which frees love from selfishness and
aggression. ... Chastity is the joyous affirmation of
someone who knows how to live self giving, free‑
from any form of self centered slavery. ... either‑
man governs his passions and finds peace, or he
lets himself be dominated by them and becomes
unhappy" [TMHS, ¶16 18].‑
265 d-tmhs
• Failure of birth control
• Side effects of birth control
• Unwanted pregnancy
• AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases
• Loss of reputation
• Loss of self-respect
• What parents and others will think
• How to pay for and aftereffects of abortion
• Violence and breakup of relationship
• Raising a child alone in poverty
• Finding a good husband or wife
• Fear of loss of your soul!
The Four Stages of Human Development
The Four Stages of Human Development
The Years of Innocence Puberty
Adolescence Adulthood
265 d-tmhs
The Years of Innocence (TMHS, ¶77-86)
• Extends from about age five to puberty.
• Children prefer to be with children of their own
sex.
• The child watches and learns from adult
example what it means to be a man or a woman.
• The years of innocence are marked by tranquility
and serenity that must never be disturbed by
unnecessary information about sex.
• The differences between the two sexes should
not be ignored or downplayed.
The Years of Innocence (TMHS, ¶77-86)
• Parents should teach boys and girls to take
the Holy Family as their models.
• Parents must prohibit others from giving their
children information on sex during this period,
because the children cannot understand it or
integrate it.
• Parents must correct erroneous information
the child collects from the media or from
friends.
• The child will find chastity very difficult to
maintain later in life if he or she is spoiled or
indulged too much.
265 d-tmhs
Puberty (TMHS, ¶87-97)
• Puberty is a time of self-discovery.
• Boys and girls at puberty are particularly
vulnerable to emotional influences.
• Information should be given in a plan of
formation whose purpose is to create a
Christian context in which all information
about life is given.
• Parents must be particularly attentive to the
Christian education of their children, with an
emphasis on the virtue of chastity.
Puberty (TMHS, ¶87-97)
• Parents should give their children more detailed
information on sexuality. For example, mothers
should explain in a general way the cycles of
fertility to their daughters.
• It is not necessary to give information on the
sexual union.
• The physiological facts about puberty should be
presented in an atmosphere of serenity and
reserve, in a positive manner.
• Instruction should emphasize the beauty of
motherhood, procreation and virginity, which
helps prevent the “contraceptive mentality.”
265 d-tmhs
Adolescence (TMHS, ¶98-108)
• Adolescence is the time during which the
person discerns his or her vocation from God,
the culmination of the parent’s mission.
There are three possible vocations — the
religious life and the married and single
states.
• The parent’s example and witness is
particularly important during the adolescence
of their children, because during this phase
they are looking for role models.
Adolescence (TMHS, ¶98-108)
• Parents should convey a positive and
informative explanation of the Church’s
teachings on sexual morality.
• Parents should make certain that the child’s
friends and their parents share the same
goals.
• Topics that should be discussed in a general
and non-graphic manner during this time
generally include masturbation and
homosexuality.
265 d-tmhs
Adulthood (TMHS, ¶109-111)
• The parents’ mission does not end when their
children reach adulthood.
• Parents should keep a confident dialogue with
their adult children while respecting their
autonomy.
• Parents can assist their children to define the
necessary elements for a holy and successful
marriage.
Adulthood (TMHS, ¶109-111)
• Boys should continue to be instructed in chastity
as well as girls.
• Teaching should be conversion-based and
primarily about chastity and education for a
vocation.
• For those who are engaged and married —
instruction in fertility awareness that is sensitive
to the culture.
Simple Secret to a Happy MarriageSimple Secret to a Happy Marriage
Simple Secret to a Happy Marriage
(1)(1) TheThe PhysicalPhysical (the body)(the body)
(2)(2) TheThe MentalMental (the mind)(the mind)
(3)(3) TheThe EmotionalEmotional (the heart)(the heart)
(4) The(4) The SpiritualSpiritual (the soul)(the soul)
(Mark 12:30)
Simple Secret to a Happy Marriage
The Four Stages of Human DevelopmentEssential Topics for Discussion
During All Four Phases of Development
• God’s plan of love for every person.
• The positive and liberating aspects of moral
law.
• Awareness of the weakness caused by sin.
Avoid near occasions of sin!
• Modest dress and behavior for both boys and
girls.
• Means of grace available which strengthen us
on our path to salvation (Confession, etc.).
265 d-tmhs
What the Sex Educators Say
“We want you to know about all your
options. If you want to abstain from sex,
that is fine. But not everyone is going to
abstain from sex. If you choose to have
sex, that is fine too. Nobody will judge
you. We will show you how to avoid
getting pregnant.”
265 d-tmhs
265 d-tmhs
The Shoplifting Parallel
“We want you to know about all your
options. If you want to abstain from
shoplifting, that is fine. But not everyone
is going to abstain from shoplifting. If you
choose to shoplift, that is fine too. Nobody
will judge you. We will show you how to
avoid getting caught.”
Four Working Principles for Chastity
Instruction (TMHS, ¶121-127)
(1) Human sexuality must be presented according to
the doctrinal and moral teachings of the Catholic
Church, bearing in mind the effects of original sin.
(2) Only information appropriate to each phase of their
development should be presented to children and
young people.
(3) No material of an erotic nature should be presented
to children or young people of any age.
(4) No one should be invited or obliged to act in any
way that would offend against modesty or offend the
person’s own sense of privacy or delicacy.
The Planned Parenthood Way of Life
10: Sex education begins.
15: Begin having sex.
18: First abortion.
19: Begin living with boy/girlfriend.
20: First sexually transmitted disease.
22: Second abortion.
26: 8 to 15 sexual partners.
27: Marriage (if very lucky).
34: Divorce, begin life of struggle and loneliness.
38: Grandmother and raise another generation.
The Virtuous Way of Life
►10: Virtue and chastity education begins.
►18: Attend college.
►20: No worry about abortion, STDs, side effects
of contraception, and no guilt.
►23: Marriage.
►40: 2%-6% divorce rate.
►50: Happy, healthy marriage and happy, healthy
kids.
►60: Play with grandkids, enjoy companionship
of husband or wife.
What Amuses Us?
265 d-tmhs
Tips for Speaking with Your Child
• Your advice must be built on a previous good
relationship with your child. If you don’t have
this relationship, you must build it.
• You must be absolutely clear about what is
acceptable behavior and what is not.
• Expect children to test these boundaries; this is
natural, and there must be fixed consequences
for violating them.
• Listen with respect when they speak.
• Trust them to do the right thing.
A child lives up to what
you expect of him or her.
A child also lives down to
what you expect of him or her.
So Set High
Standards!
So Set High
Standards!
“The life of sin is a fall
from coherence to chaos;
the life of virtue a climb
from the many to the
One ... Vice is contrary to
human nature, because it
is against the order of
reason.”
— St. Thomas Aquinas,
Summa Theologica,
1-2, 71, 1-2.
“It is always easier to live
a life of virtue than it is to
live a life without it.”
— Mahatma Gandhi.
Brian Clowes
Human Life International
4 Family Life Lane
Front Royal, Virginia USA 22630
E-mail address: bclowes@hli.org
Brian Clowes
Human Life International
4 Family Life Lane
Front Royal, Virginia USA 22630
E-mail address: bclowes@hli.org

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265 d-tmhs

  • 3. The Three Types of Education in Human Sexuality (1) Education in chastity; (2) Biological sex education (“organ recital”); and (3) Comprehensive sex education.
  • 5. Elements of Biological Sex Education (1) Biological facts about human reproduction; (2) Information on sexual development; (3) Information on preventing sexual abuse.
  • 6. Elements of Comprehensive Sex Education (1) Biological facts about human reproduction; (2) Information on sexual development; (3) Information on preventing sexual abuse; (4) Comprehensive birth control information; (5) Information on abortion and how to obtain them; and (6) “Values clarification,” lifeboat exercises, etc.
  • 7. Messages of Comprehensive Sex Education • “Do your own thing.” • “If it feels good, do it.” • “You can't really help yourself because you are a sexual being.” • “If [when] you have sex, that is all right. Nobody will judge you. Just be responsible and use a condom.” • “Nobody can judge you or what you do.” • “It’s all about freedom!”
  • 9. "Young people's sexuality is still contentious for many religious institutions. Fundamentalist and other religious groups — the Catholic Church and madrasas (Islamic Schools) for example — have imposed tremendous barriers that prevent young people, particularly, from obtaining information and services related to sex and reproduction. Currently, many religious teachings deny the pleasurable and positive aspects of sex."
  • 11. What Are They Thinking? "Young people have the right to be fully informed about sexuality and to have access to contraceptives and other services. These rights are enshrined in various internationally agreed human rights convention and treaties, but — unfortunately — they are still not universally respected." —Bert Koenders of the Development Cooperation of the Netherlands.
  • 12. “It's far more difficult to respond to completely ignorant broadsides than to well informed criticisms. … Planned Parenthood speaks here and elsewhere without even a glancing familiarity with a single primary text about human sexuality authored by the Catholic Church.” — Helen Alvaré, consultant to the Pontifical Council for the Laity.
  • 13. Why Are Ten Years of Sex Education Necessary? • Systematic Behavioral Modification (SBM), i.e. slow brainwashing. • “Make up your own minds about important things.” • “You don’t need to tell anyone anything; your privacy is paramount.” • Makes a pliable “good citizen” who can be more easily controlled by the power structures if given benefits.
  • 14. What is Sexuality? "... sexuality is not something purely biological, rather it concerns the intimate nucleus of the person.” — TMHS, ¶3.
  • 15. What is Chastity? “Chastity is the spiritual power which frees love from selfishness and aggression.” — TMHS, 16-21.
  • 16. Chastity Education • Requires the most preparation. • Is the most difficult to teach because it is countercultural and works against man's fallen nature. • To be most effective, it must be carefully tailored to the needs and personality of each child. • Therefore, the parents of each child are the most appropriate chastity educators.
  • 17. Chastity Education • Parents are sometimes nervous because they think they have to give an organ recital and because they believe that they are not qualified as educators. On the contrary, they are the only ones properly qualified to teach their own children. • Chastity education must be part of a lifestyle taught by people who live moral lives, and who present it as a part of an integrated program on Christian living throughout all 12 years of grade and high school. Chastity is not taught, it is caught.
  • 18. Chastity: Lead by Example! “Contracepting parents beget fornicating teenagers.” –– Father Paul Marx, Founder of HLI. Chastity: Lead by Example! “Contracepting parents beget fornicating teenagers.” –– Father Paul Marx, Founder of HLI.
  • 19. General Principles for Teaching Chastity (TMHS, ¶65-76) • Each child is a unique and unrepeatable person and must receive individualized formation. • The moral dimension of sexuality must always be part of the parent's explanations. • Formation in chastity and timely information regarding sexuality must be provided in the broadest context of education for love. • Parents should provide information with great delicacy, with clarity, and at the appropriate time.
  • 21. Is Chastity Education "Oppressive?"
  • 22. Is Chastity Education "Oppressive?" "If the person is not master of self — through the virtues and, in a concrete way, through chastity — he or she lacks that self possession which makes‑ self giving possible. Chastity is the spiritual‑ power which frees love from selfishness and aggression. ... Chastity is the joyous affirmation of someone who knows how to live self giving, free‑ from any form of self centered slavery. ... either‑ man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy" [TMHS, ¶16 18].‑
  • 24. • Failure of birth control • Side effects of birth control • Unwanted pregnancy • AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases • Loss of reputation • Loss of self-respect • What parents and others will think • How to pay for and aftereffects of abortion • Violence and breakup of relationship • Raising a child alone in poverty • Finding a good husband or wife • Fear of loss of your soul!
  • 25. The Four Stages of Human Development
  • 26. The Four Stages of Human Development The Years of Innocence Puberty Adolescence Adulthood
  • 28. The Years of Innocence (TMHS, ¶77-86) • Extends from about age five to puberty. • Children prefer to be with children of their own sex. • The child watches and learns from adult example what it means to be a man or a woman. • The years of innocence are marked by tranquility and serenity that must never be disturbed by unnecessary information about sex. • The differences between the two sexes should not be ignored or downplayed.
  • 29. The Years of Innocence (TMHS, ¶77-86) • Parents should teach boys and girls to take the Holy Family as their models. • Parents must prohibit others from giving their children information on sex during this period, because the children cannot understand it or integrate it. • Parents must correct erroneous information the child collects from the media or from friends. • The child will find chastity very difficult to maintain later in life if he or she is spoiled or indulged too much.
  • 31. Puberty (TMHS, ¶87-97) • Puberty is a time of self-discovery. • Boys and girls at puberty are particularly vulnerable to emotional influences. • Information should be given in a plan of formation whose purpose is to create a Christian context in which all information about life is given. • Parents must be particularly attentive to the Christian education of their children, with an emphasis on the virtue of chastity.
  • 32. Puberty (TMHS, ¶87-97) • Parents should give their children more detailed information on sexuality. For example, mothers should explain in a general way the cycles of fertility to their daughters. • It is not necessary to give information on the sexual union. • The physiological facts about puberty should be presented in an atmosphere of serenity and reserve, in a positive manner. • Instruction should emphasize the beauty of motherhood, procreation and virginity, which helps prevent the “contraceptive mentality.”
  • 34. Adolescence (TMHS, ¶98-108) • Adolescence is the time during which the person discerns his or her vocation from God, the culmination of the parent’s mission. There are three possible vocations — the religious life and the married and single states. • The parent’s example and witness is particularly important during the adolescence of their children, because during this phase they are looking for role models.
  • 35. Adolescence (TMHS, ¶98-108) • Parents should convey a positive and informative explanation of the Church’s teachings on sexual morality. • Parents should make certain that the child’s friends and their parents share the same goals. • Topics that should be discussed in a general and non-graphic manner during this time generally include masturbation and homosexuality.
  • 37. Adulthood (TMHS, ¶109-111) • The parents’ mission does not end when their children reach adulthood. • Parents should keep a confident dialogue with their adult children while respecting their autonomy. • Parents can assist their children to define the necessary elements for a holy and successful marriage.
  • 38. Adulthood (TMHS, ¶109-111) • Boys should continue to be instructed in chastity as well as girls. • Teaching should be conversion-based and primarily about chastity and education for a vocation. • For those who are engaged and married — instruction in fertility awareness that is sensitive to the culture.
  • 39. Simple Secret to a Happy MarriageSimple Secret to a Happy Marriage
  • 40. Simple Secret to a Happy Marriage (1)(1) TheThe PhysicalPhysical (the body)(the body) (2)(2) TheThe MentalMental (the mind)(the mind) (3)(3) TheThe EmotionalEmotional (the heart)(the heart) (4) The(4) The SpiritualSpiritual (the soul)(the soul) (Mark 12:30) Simple Secret to a Happy Marriage
  • 41. The Four Stages of Human DevelopmentEssential Topics for Discussion During All Four Phases of Development • God’s plan of love for every person. • The positive and liberating aspects of moral law. • Awareness of the weakness caused by sin. Avoid near occasions of sin! • Modest dress and behavior for both boys and girls. • Means of grace available which strengthen us on our path to salvation (Confession, etc.).
  • 43. What the Sex Educators Say “We want you to know about all your options. If you want to abstain from sex, that is fine. But not everyone is going to abstain from sex. If you choose to have sex, that is fine too. Nobody will judge you. We will show you how to avoid getting pregnant.”
  • 46. The Shoplifting Parallel “We want you to know about all your options. If you want to abstain from shoplifting, that is fine. But not everyone is going to abstain from shoplifting. If you choose to shoplift, that is fine too. Nobody will judge you. We will show you how to avoid getting caught.”
  • 47. Four Working Principles for Chastity Instruction (TMHS, ¶121-127) (1) Human sexuality must be presented according to the doctrinal and moral teachings of the Catholic Church, bearing in mind the effects of original sin. (2) Only information appropriate to each phase of their development should be presented to children and young people. (3) No material of an erotic nature should be presented to children or young people of any age. (4) No one should be invited or obliged to act in any way that would offend against modesty or offend the person’s own sense of privacy or delicacy.
  • 48. The Planned Parenthood Way of Life 10: Sex education begins. 15: Begin having sex. 18: First abortion. 19: Begin living with boy/girlfriend. 20: First sexually transmitted disease. 22: Second abortion. 26: 8 to 15 sexual partners. 27: Marriage (if very lucky). 34: Divorce, begin life of struggle and loneliness. 38: Grandmother and raise another generation.
  • 49. The Virtuous Way of Life ►10: Virtue and chastity education begins. ►18: Attend college. ►20: No worry about abortion, STDs, side effects of contraception, and no guilt. ►23: Marriage. ►40: 2%-6% divorce rate. ►50: Happy, healthy marriage and happy, healthy kids. ►60: Play with grandkids, enjoy companionship of husband or wife.
  • 52. Tips for Speaking with Your Child • Your advice must be built on a previous good relationship with your child. If you don’t have this relationship, you must build it. • You must be absolutely clear about what is acceptable behavior and what is not. • Expect children to test these boundaries; this is natural, and there must be fixed consequences for violating them. • Listen with respect when they speak. • Trust them to do the right thing.
  • 53. A child lives up to what you expect of him or her.
  • 54. A child also lives down to what you expect of him or her.
  • 55. So Set High Standards! So Set High Standards!
  • 56. “The life of sin is a fall from coherence to chaos; the life of virtue a climb from the many to the One ... Vice is contrary to human nature, because it is against the order of reason.” — St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologica, 1-2, 71, 1-2.
  • 57. “It is always easier to live a life of virtue than it is to live a life without it.” — Mahatma Gandhi.
  • 58. Brian Clowes Human Life International 4 Family Life Lane Front Royal, Virginia USA 22630 E-mail address: bclowes@hli.org Brian Clowes Human Life International 4 Family Life Lane Front Royal, Virginia USA 22630 E-mail address: bclowes@hli.org

Notes de l'éditeur

  1. Title of Presentation: The Church’s Teaching on the Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality Presentation updated on February 2, 2010.
  2. The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality: Guidelines for Education within the Family
  3. The Three Types of Education in Human Sexuality (1) Education in chastity; (2) Biological sex education (“organ recital”); and (3) Comprehensive sex education.
  4. Elements of Biological Sex Education (1) Biological facts about human reproduction; (2) Information on sexual development; (3) Information on preventing sexual abuse.
  5. Elements of Comprehensive Sex Education (1) Biological facts about human reproduction; (2) Information on sexual development; (3) Information on preventing sexual abuse; (4) Comprehensive birth control information; (5) Information on abortion and how to obtain them; and (6) “Values clarification,” lifeboat exercises, etc.
  6. Messages of Comprehensive Sex Education “Do your own thing.” “If it feels good, do it.” “You can't really help yourself because you are a sexual being.” “If [when] you have sex, that is all right. Nobody will judge you. Just be responsible and use a condom.” “Nobody can judge you or what you do.” “It’s all about freedom!”
  7. What International Planned Parenthood Says. "Young people's sexuality is still contentious for many religious institutions. Fundamentalist and other religious groups — the Catholic Church and madrasas (Islamic Schools) for example — have imposed tremendous barriers that prevent young people, particularly, from obtaining information and services related to sex and reproduction. Currently, many religious teachings deny the pleasurable and positive aspects of sex." — International Planned Parenthood Federation. “Stand & Deliver: Sex, Health and Young People in the 21st Century.” November 2009, page 28.
  8. What Are They Thinking? "Young people have the right to be fully informed about sexuality and to have access to contraceptives and other services. These rights are enshrined in various internationally agreed human rights convention and treaties, but — unfortunately — they are still not universally respected."— Bert Koenders of the Development Cooperation of the Netherlands, in the foreword to the IPPF report.
  9. Response of the Vatican to the IPPF Report “It's far more difficult to respond to completely ignorant broadsides than to well informed criticisms. … Planned Parenthood speaks here and elsewhere without even a glancing familiarity with a single primary text about human sexuality authored by the Catholic Church. If they ever do decide to read one or two items, I wholeheartedly recommend John Paul II's Theology of the Body, or Love and Responsibility, or the first half of Pope Benedict XVI's Deus Caritas Est. What they will find there will help them understand how impoverished and demeaning their current efforts are, and how realistic are the insights offered by the Catholic faith.” — Helen Alvaré, consultant to the Pontifical Council for the Laity, quoted in Kathleen Gilbert. “Vatican Consultant Responds to 'Completely Ignorant' IPPF Accusation.” LifeSite Daily News at http://www.lifesitenews.com, February 9, 2010.
  10. Why Are Ten Years of Sex Education Necessary? Systematic Behavioral Modification (SBM), i.e. slow brainwashing. “Make up your own minds about important things.” “You don’t need to tell anyone anything; your privacy is paramount.” Makes a pliable “good citizen” who can be more easily controlled by the power structures if given benefits.
  11. What is Sexuality? "... sexuality is not something purely biological, rather it concerns the intimate nucleus of the person" [TMHS, ¶3].
  12. What is Chastity? “Chastity is the spiritual power which frees love from selfishness and aggression.” — TMHS, ¶16-21.
  13. Chastity Education Requires the most preparation. Is the most difficult to teach because it is countercultural and works against man's fallen nature. To be most effective, it must be carefully tailored to the needs and personality of each child. Therefore, the parents of each child are the most appropriate chastity educators. Parents are sometimes nervous because they think they have to give an organ recital and because they believe that they are not qualified as educators. On the contrary, they are the only ones properly qualified to teach their own children. Chastity education must be part of a lifestyle taught by people who live moral lives, and who present it as a part of an integrated program on Christian living throughout all 12 years of grade and high school. Chastity is not taught, it is caught.
  14. As Father Paul Marx, O.S.B., the founder of Human Life International has said, "Contracepting parents beget fornicating teenagers."
  15. General Principles for Teaching Chastity (TMHS, ¶65-76) Each child is a unique and unrepeatable person and must receive individualized formation. The moral dimension of sexuality must always be part of the parent's explanations. Formation in chastity and timely information regarding sexuality must be provided in the broadest context of education for love. Parents should provide information with great delicacy, with clarity, and at the appropriate time.
  16. Some people, like those who are members of the National Abortion Rights Action League (NARAL), despise the abstinence message because they think it is “oppressive.” On the contrary, as we will see, people (especially girls and women) who following NARAL’s and Planned Parenthood’s advice will wind up being horribly oppressed by their bad choices for the rest of their lives.
  17. Is Chastity Education "Oppressive?“ "If the person is not master of self — through the virtues and, in a concrete way, through chastity — he or she lacks that self‑possession which makes self‑giving possible. Chastity is the spiritual power which frees love from selfishness and aggression. ... Chastity is the joyous affirmation of someone who knows how to live self‑giving, free from any form of self‑centered slavery. ... either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy" [TMHS, ¶16‑18].
  18. What, Me Worry? We at Human Life International tell young people (those who are unmarried, and teenagers in schools) that there are many advantages to not having sex before marriage. Those who do decide to have sex weigh their minds down with many worries that they would not otherwise have; Failure of birth control: This is a particular problem among the young. Condoms have a one in twelve probability of breaking, tearing or slipping off, and even the so-called “effective” hormonal methods do not work very well in young girls, because their cycles are still being established. Side effects of birth control: The patient information pamphlets issued by the contraceptive and abortifacient manufacturers are often many pages long, and the side effects listed range from death to weight gain and, ironically, loss of sexual desire. Unwanted pregnancy: Whether you use birth control or not, the probability of pregnancy is very high among young people. AIDS and sexually transmitted diseases: Condoms do not protect against AIDS, and the hormonal methods offer no protection at all. One of four young women getting married in the United States has an incurable sexually transmitted disease. Loss of reputation. Loss of self-respect. What parents and others will think. How to pay for and aftereffects of abortion. Violence and breakup of relationship: In the United States, at least fifty pregnant women are murdered by their husbands and boyfriends each year because they refuse to obtain abortions (see http://www.abortionviolence.org). Additionally, about ninety percent of all marriages and other relationships break up within three months of an abortion. Raising a child alone in poverty: Young women think that their sexual “partner” will stick around if she gets pregnant. 90 percent of them do not, and she is dumped, having to raise children alone. Such men are only having a relationship with her for one reason: sex. Finding a good husband or wife: If a young man is truly virtuous and expects to save himself until marriage, he is certainly not going to want to marry a young man who has a lot of sexual “experience” or a couple of children out of wedlock. Promiscuous young women are guaranteeing that they will wind up with a succession of “losers.” Above all, fear of loss of your soul!
  19. The Four Stages of Human Development The Years of Innocence; Puberty; Adolescence; and Adulthood.
  20. The Years of Innocence (TMHS, ¶77-86) Extends from about age five to puberty. Children prefer to be with children of their own sex. The child watches and learns from adult example what it means to be a man or a woman. The years of innocence are marked by tranquility and serenity that must never be disturbed by unnecessary information about sex. The differences between the two sexes should not be ignored or downplayed. Parents should teach boys and girls to take the Holy Family as their models. Parents must prohibit others from giving their children information on sex during this period, because the children cannot understand it or integrate it. Parents must correct erroneous information the child collects from the media or from friends. The child will find chastity very difficult to maintain later in life if he or she is spoiled or indulged too much.
  21. Puberty (TMHS, ¶87-97) Puberty is a time of self-discovery. Boys and girls at puberty are particularly vulnerable to emotional influences. Information should be given in a plan of formation whose purpose is to create a Christian context in which all information about life is given. Parents must be particularly attentive to the Christian education of their children, with an emphasis on the virtue of chastity. Parents should give their children more detailed information on sexuality. For example, mothers should explain in a general way the cycles of fertility to their daughters. It is not necessary to give information on the sexual union. The physiological facts about puberty should be presented in an atmosphere of serenity and reserve, in a positive manner. Instruction should emphasize the beauty of motherhood, procreation and virginity, which helps prevent the “contraceptive mentality.”
  22. Adolescence (TMHS, ¶98-108) Adolescence is the time during which the person discerns his or her vocation from God, the culmination of the parent’s mission. There are three possible vocations — the religious life and the married and single states. The parent’s example and witness is particularly important during the adolescence of their children, because during this phase they are looking for role models. Parents should convey a positive and informative explanation of the Church’s teachings on sexual morality. Parents should make certain that the child’s friends and their parents share the same goals. Topics that should be discussed in a general and non-graphic manner during this time generally include masturbation and homosexuality.
  23. Adulthood (TMHS, ¶109-111) The parents’ mission does not end when their children reach adulthood. Parents should keep a confident dialogue with their adult children while respecting their autonomy. Parents can assist their children to define the necessary elements for a holy and successful marriage. Boys should continue to be instructed in chastity as well as girls. Teaching should be conversion-based and primarily about chastity and education for a vocation. For those who are engaged and married — instruction in fertility awareness that is sensitive to the culture.
  24. There is Only One Secret to a Happy Relationship: The Four Elements of the Person. We have learned from experience that every human being is a unique creation of God. Each person born is singular and unrepeatable, and everyone lives a different life and has different experiences that shape their personalities. Our Lord told us “… you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength” [Mark 12:30]. This means that, however unique each person is, everyone is comprised of four primary elements; (1) The physical element (the body); (2) The mental element (the mind, or intellect); (3) The emotional element (the heart); and (4) The spiritual element (the soul). Theologians and missionaries recognize that we are all born with birth defects of varying degrees of severity. The most visible to man's eyes, of course, are the physical birth defects or handicaps. Everyone immediately knows if someone is wheelchair-bound or suffers from severe cerebral palsy. But as we move from physical to mental to emotional to spiritual birth defects and handicaps, they become less obvious to the eyes of man and more evident to the eyes of God. In other words, spiritual birth defects are much less visible to human eyes than physical birth defects — but are much more important and central to the identity of a person.      The key to a happy life – and a happy marriage – is lost on this world. These days, most relationships between men and women start with the physical (having sex). As the relationship continues, the man and woman may proceed to find out if they are mentally compatible. Usually, they get no further than this. They do not ever plumb the depths of the person – the emotional and the physical, upon which enduring relationships are based. This is why about 80 percent of marriages between people who cohabit, or “shack up,” end in divorce. By contrast, the Catholic Church knows full well the secret of living a long and happy life together. If a young man and young woman find that they are compatible spiritually first, this is the foundation of a lasting relationship. They then go on to find that they are compatible emotionally and mentally, and, finally, if they are in tune on these elements, they will find on their wedding night that they are indeed compatible physically. In the United States, married couples who use natural family planning (NFP) and observe the teachings of the Catholic Church, have about a three percent to six percent divorce rate.
  25. Essential Topics for Discussion During All Four Phases of Development God’s plan of love for every person. The positive and liberating aspects of moral law. Awareness of the weakness caused by sin. Avoid near occasions of sin! Modest dress and behavior for both boys and girls. Means of grace available which strengthen us on our path to salvation (Confession, etc.).
  26. What the Sex Educators Say “We want you to know about all your options. If you want to abstain from sex, that is fine. But not everyone is going to abstain from sex. If you choose to have sex, that is fine too. Nobody will judge you. We will show you how to avoid getting pregnant.”
  27. Advocates of comprehensive sex education in the public schools often claim that teaching about sex will not lead to sexual behavior. This is as nonsensical as telling us that giving teenagers cars will not lead to “driving behavior.” Sex educators tell children: “We want you to know about all your options. If you want to abstain from sex, that is fine. But not everyone is going to abstain from sex. If you choose to have sex, that is fine too. Nobody will judge you. We will show you how to avoid getting pregnant.” These people can be refuted by telling them a parallel: “We want you to know about all your options. If you want to abstain from shoplifting, that is fine. But not everyone is going to abstain from shoplifting. If you choose to shoplift, that is fine too. Nobody will judge you. We will show you how to avoid getting caught.”
  28. Four Working Principles for Chastity Instruction (TMHS, ¶121-127) Human sexuality must be presented according to the doctrinal and moral teachings of the Catholic Church, bearing in mind the effects of original sin. Only information appropriate to each phase of their development should be presented to children and young people. No material of an erotic nature should be presented to children or young people of any age. No one should be invited or obliged to act in any way that would offend against modesty or offend the person’s own sense of privacy or delicacy.
  29. The Planned Parenthood Way of Life 10: Sex education begins. 15: Begin having sex. 18: First abortion. 19: Begin living with boy/girlfriend. 20: First sexually transmitted disease. 22: Second abortion. 26: 8 to 15 sexual partners. 27: Marriage. 34: Divorce, begin life of struggle and loneliness. 38: Grandmother and raise another generation.
  30. The Virtuous Way of Life 10: Virtue and chastity education begins. 18: Attend college. 20: No worry about abortion, STDs, side effects of contraception, and no guilt. 23: Marriage. 40: 2%-6% divorce rate. 50: Happy, healthy marriage and happy, healthy kids. 60: Play with grandkids, enjoy companionship of husband or wife.
  31. What Amuses Us? This is an age of entertainment, an age of distraction, an age of fevered activity. We immerse ourselves in experience and sensation, always making our physical selves feel good and engaged. The common complaint these days is “I’m so busy!” We all strive for deep inner contentment while losing it in what has been called the “tyranny of the immediate.” When we do try to reach for inner peace, the Devil is right there to tempt us with a galaxy of distractions. Most of these are not harmful, if they are taken in moderation. Indeed, some of them, like food and a certain amount of money, are necessary for our continued physical survival. The primary problem with all of these distractions, if we do not control them, is that they can lead to addiction –– and further remove us from the Source of all true peace and contentment, Jesus Christ. As St. Ambrose said, “The Devil’s snare does not catch you, unless you are first caught by the Devil’s bait” [Explanation of Psalm 118, 13, 37 (4th Century)]. There are many things that amuse us, but only in a shallow and temporary way: Drugs, sex, influence, possessions, the “New Age,” money, travel, fame, food, alcohol and power. According to Time Magazine [1], 18.7 million people in the United States [7.7% of the population] are alcoholics, and 12,000 more try it for the first time every day. 3.6 million Americans are drug addicts, and 8,000 more try it each day for the first time. 71.5 million people in the United States use tobacco products. 4 million Americans are food addicts, and about 15% of mildly obese people are compulsive eaters. Two million American adults are gambling addicts. An additional 4 to 6 million are considered to be “problem gamblers.” At least one in twenty adult Americans (or about ten million people) are compulsive shoppers. About 16 million Americans are sexual addicts – addicted to fornication, adultery, homosexual acts or pornography. Compulsive Internet use and overconsumption of caffeine products like coffee, Coke or energy drinks are often thought to be addictive behaviors. [1] Michael D. Lemonick, with Alice Park. “The Science of Addiction.” Time Magazine, July 16, 2007, pages 42 to 47.
  32. But, in the end, all of these things are mere distractions, only amusements. There are only two things that can truly make us content on this earth: Faith and family. Not surprisingly, these are the two things that are under most intense attack today, because the Devil wants us not only to be miserable through eternity with him, but unhappy on this world as well.
  33. Tips for Speaking with Your Child Your advice must be built on a previous good relationship with your child. If you don’t have this relationship, you must build it. You must be absolutely clear about what is acceptable behavior and what is not. Expect children to test these boundaries; this is natural, and there must be fixed consequences for violating them. Listen with respect when they speak. Trust them to do the right thing.
  34. A child lives up to what you expect of him or her.
  35. Unfortunately a child also lives down to what you expect of him or her.
  36. So set high standards!
  37. “The life of sin is a fall from coherence to chaos; the life of virtue a climb from the many to the One ... Vice is contrary to human nature, because it is against the order of reason.” — St. Thomas Aquinas, Summa Theologica, 1-2, 71, 1-2.
  38. “It is always easier to live a life of virtue than it is to live a life without it.” — Mahatma Gandhi.
  39. An interesting Web site that may be of interest are updated by Brian Clowes and maintained by Human Life International; The “Abortion Violence” Web site at http://www.abortionviolence.com, which lists more than 8,500 incidents of pro-abortion violence and illegal activities, arranged by state and Canadian province. These acts include more than 1,300 documented cases of murder by pro-abortion persons. Contact Information Brian Clowes Human Life International 4 Family Life Lane Front Royal, Virginia USA 22630 E-mail address: [email_address]