2. Objectives
Recognize many ways you communicate with others
Evaluate the importance of good listening skills
Judge the importance of communicating a positive
image of yourself
Identify five levels of communication
Describe assertive behavior and its effect on
communication
Analyze communication skills that work well with
parents
Describe group behaviors that involve violence
Recognize sexual harassment if it occurs
3. Levelsa of Communication
1. Make small circle with the
groups I have organized.
2. Everyone must participate.
3. No talking with other groups.
4. Everyone must listen with their
eyes.
5. When I call time you must stop
where you are.
6. If you have not finished the
previous round, finish it and then
move on.
9. Levels of Communication “SPV”
Superficial
Communication making up the
majority of our communication.
Talking about the
Personal
weather, home, school, food, et Communication involving
c.
opening up and talking about
feelings, beliefs and opinions
that mean something to you.
Validating
Communication reinforcing
people’s feelings about
themselves.
10. Levels of Communication
Questions
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
Can a relationship remain stable for an extended period
of time if they communicate in a superficial state? Why?
Which levels of communication must a relationship
strive for in order to grow? Why?
Which was more difficult to share in group?
Events, Influences, Personal qualities, Compliments.
Why?
What are some reactions that occurred in your group?
Explain why these occurred.
Why is it more difficult to share personal qualities and
compliments.
Why would you communicate superficially?
11. Reasons for keeping Communication
Superficial:
I may be hurt.
I don’t want to hurt their feelings.
They will misinterpret what I say.
They won’t be receptive
It will put our relationship at risk.
I will be out on a limb and won’t be
supported.
http://www.mnadr.state.mn.us/workplace/pdf/Keepcomm.pdf
12. What Validation Is
To validate someone's feelings is first to accept
someone's feelings. Next, it is to understand them, and
finally it is to nurture them.
13. Basic Steps to Validation
Acknowledging the other person's feelings
Identifying the feelings
Offering to listen
Helping them label the feelings
Being there for them; remaining present physically
and emotionally
Feeling patient
Feeling accepting and non-judgmental
14. Example of Validating
I hear you.
That hurts
That's not good
Wow, that's a lot to deal with
I would feel the same way.
(I would be sad/hurt/angry/jealous, etc. too)
That is sad.
That sounds discouraging.
That sounds like it would really hurt
That must really hurt.
I know just what you mean.
I would feel the same way.
I can understand how you feel.
It sounds like you are really feeling ____.
It sounds like is really important to you.
15. Terms to Know
Communication – any means by
which you share a message with
another person
Verbal Communication – use
words to send or receive a message
Body Language – A form of nonverbal communication
16. Conflict
1. to come into collision or disagreement; be
contradictory, at variance, or in opposition; clash:
2. to fight or contend; do battle.
3. a fight, battle, or struggle, esp. a prolonged struggle;
strife.
4. controversy; quarrel: conflicts between parties. 5.
discord of action, feeling, or effect; antagonism or
opposition, as of interests or principles: a conflict of
ideas.
6. a striking together; collision.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21. Terms to Know Cont.
Non-verbal Communication –
use factors other than words ex.
Gestures, facial expressions, eye
contact, and body movements
Active Listening – Type of
listening in which a person
indicates to the sender that a
message has been heard and
encourages further
communication
22. Terms to Know Cont.
Feedback – Communicating to the other person how
you feel about what was said
Passive listening – Taking in the words and offers no
sign of hearing or understanding
Empathy – Process of seeing things from another
person’s view
23. Terms to Know Cont.
Assertive – To express your
feelings directly
Cliques - A narrow, exclusive
group of people held
together by common
interests
Mediator – Third party that
helps resolve conflicts
24. Terms to Know Cont.
Hazing – A social groups
intentional infliction of
physical and emotional
abuse
Bullying – Refers to
infliction of
physical, verbal, or
emotional abuse
25. Terms to Know Cont.
Conflict Resolution – A form of meditation that solves
disagreements in a positive way.
Sexual Harassment – Unwelcome sexual
advances, requests for sexual favors for other verbal or
physical conduct of sexual nature.
26. Levels of Communication
Level Five
Little conversation – weakest
level
Often referred to as cliché
Level Four
Draw out very little from other
or yourself
Not interested in conversation
27. Levels of Communication
Level Three
Engage in conversation
Willingness in this level is to share your ideas and
judgments with others
Carefully restrict ideas until you know what other’s
reactions will be.
28. Levels of Communication
Level Two
Become increasingly open
to others and expose
feelings and emotions
Strong desire to tell how
you feel in being
completely honest
Do not judge others
around you
29. Levels of Communication
Level One
Completely open and honest
with others
Have courage to reveal deepest
thoughts and feelings to others
Want to know and understand
what another person is feeling
and why
30. Motivator
Hammer Communication
or
Calvin and Hobbes
or
Often we really communicate destructively and
constructively with people we are surrounded
with. Whole days can be ruined because of
destructive communication. Put – down take 14
positive remarks to erase.
31. Hammer of Communication
THE CLAW IS LIKE
DESTRUCTIVE
COMMUNICATION.
THE SHANK IS LIKE
NON-VERBAL
COMMUNICATION:
It is sharp and dangerous
and is used to destroy and
tear down relationships.
It is strong and can
be used to support
construction or
destruction.
THE HANDLE OF THE
HAMMER IS LIKE US– IT
IS THE DRIVING FORCE.
We are in control of our
communication and
choose to use it in a
constructive or destructive
manner.
THE HEAD IS LIKE
CONSTRUCTIVE
COMMUNICATION.
It is smooth and rounded
and is used to build and
help put things together.
32. What is an I-Message?
Not accusing are not
belittling
Use these to take
responsibility for how you
feel
These messages are less
threatening and help keep
lines of communication open
33. What is a You-Message?
Often used but more
negative than an Imessage
Creates confrontation
when you do not mean to
Accusing and belittling
34. What is a We-Statement?
Offers a further step in
improving communication
particularly in families
These indicate the problem
existing in a group or
relationship
Minimize individualistic
aspects of a problem and
emphasize togetherness
35. Results of Win-Win Solutions
•More creative in Thinking up solutions
•Take more responsibility for helping everyone
have needs met
•Feeling of mutual respect
•Love grows deeper with every conflict resolved.
36. Cliques
Often put pressure on teens to pretend they are
something they are not
Provide support and security
Give teens an identity
37. Hazing
Involves humiliation or
physical distress
Teens with high selfesteem see hazing for
what it is, hostile people
feel they have power over
others
38. Bullying
Form of violence including theft, staling money, harsh
pranks, and imposed territorial bases
Target people who seem weaker or smaller than their
self
39. Gangs
Network of people that are
involved in criminal activity
and violence
Gangs are formed for a sense
of belonging and protection