Roman Humeniuk: Communication issues and their consequences in the day-to-day work (UA)

1. Communication issues and their consequences in the day-to-day work

2. 7+ years in ІT Roles - QA Ops DevOps .NET Dev Scrum Master Engineering Project Manager Roman Humeniuk

3. Communication purposes Informative 1 ● notification, communication, transfer or addition of information, notifications Convincing 2 ● to influence someone, to receive something Exhibition 3 ● attracting attention, arousing interest, window dressing Educational 4 ● give advice, explain, learn Entertaining 5 ● distract, cheer up, fill time Feedback 6 ● is used, which is determined by the reaction of one side to the received message

4. Communication barriers Physical Language & Culture Physiological Attitudes Structure Design Common experience Ambiguity Info Overloaded Jumping to conclusions Inadequate equipment Emotional noise Cultural noise (region, age) Health, pain, gender Complicated org structure No common examples Different previous experience Overuse of abstractions Too many details Making assumptions instead of listening CAUSED BY

5. Communication Practice Cases Investigation Not always straightforward All examples are ﬁctitious

6. I don’t like such relation to myself but I won’t tell about that because I “don’t want to push on somebody don’t want to be such a human” I communicate info as I know with an expectation that it is acceptable and ok for all of us (jokes, bad words, high voice) I’ll have accumulative emotional effect that brings me to start a conﬂict I clearly don’t understand an issue since for me it’s ok. But now I’m also angry that you push on me Background

7. Hi. Here is a task you should do! I’m starting my work on this task. I see “risks opened questions blockers” but I won’t raise them “to not look like a loser to show myself as an expert other reason” DD is coming. Issue is not ﬁxed. Consequences are worse than expected. I’m really angry since expectations are failed. I need to re-do some stuff Your expectations

8. Hi. Here is a task you should do! I’m starting my work on this task. I see that it is underestimated but I won’t raise them because I want to show myself as a hero expert I have overtimes, I do a sacriﬁce. Everybody needs to appreciate that Task is done. Let’s move on. Nobody appreciates my work. I’m angry and upset My expectations

9. I’m saying a bad joke related to the person and understood it too late I hear a joke and ignore it I accept that as “unsaid” deal and trying to do something good to ﬁx it based on our deal I’m also angry since I thought we had a deal and I’ve done what I thought to ﬁx it I’m still angry and upset with accumulative emotional effect Assumptions

10. Hi. Let’s discuss what should be done in scope of the task! We are doing some discussions on words Ok, sure. Let’s do it! 1 week after commitment we don’t remember exactly how it was aligned but we assume that it should be done like that We failed a task due to the difference in things to be done Alignment

11. My solution here is correct I disagree, it should be done in this way I start to scream because this is how I resolve a conﬂict We have destructive conﬂict with further communication dysfunctions, like offends I’m making fun of your solution since I do it like this Negotiation

12. I tell you some bad stuff about our colleague I disagree but don’t say that to not fail all relationship For me it is an acceptance of my opinion I found out what you are talking about me and angry on both of you I didn’t have that opinion and not guilty in this situation but I’m responsible as a part of the dialog Responsibility

13. Hi guys. We have this problem. What should we do? Ok, here what I can propose you in direct message We decide everything in the chat Transparency We found what you’ve done and we disagree and upset you didn’t share You didn’t answer on the message and we didn’t share

14. I have a problem and write to my colleague I’m busy have a lunch and don’t answer quickly I’m angry because you didn’t answer me on time I’m angry because I do not need to answer you immediately SLA

15. I have a problem and write to my colleague I have a vacation sickness and don’t answer you I’m angry because I didn’t know the reason you didn’t answer me I’m angry because I have a vacation when I don’t need to do working activities Agreements

16. Hi. I said, It should be changed I don’t like such communication approach I get a response not in time or have future conﬂict I’m trying to move out of the activity or to make a delay Business communication

17. He will not become a good engineer She’s trying to show off herself She doesn’t care about the job He is stupid Judgments

18. Instruments that can help

19. Communication context The current emotional mood of the participants Background - Age, previous experience, education, intelligence, perception, imagination, thinking, learning ability, adaptability, resilience, etc. Motivational setting (needs, interests, values, expectations) Their properties that affect emotional reactions in the long term (temperament, cognitive style, empathy level, complexes) Relationship between participants in the communication process Social Status & Role External reasons related to Time & Place

20. Update flow a. Should I let my colleagues know that I left work place, if so, how? i. This is the foundation for a conflict that can be avoided before it begins b. If you have a question from someone in a chat, maybe you should respond to it, even if there is no answer, say something like "I don’t know" and not just keep quiet? i. Otherwise, silence in response to questions in a chat can become a habit c. Maybe you should turn on auto reply and change the status to OOO, if there is a holiday or vacation? Agreements Status & Communication rules a. Maybe let’s have 0-tolerance on the feedback flow? b. Should I somehow inform people that I'm busy right now and it’s better not touch me? c. Maybe you should have a common communication channel and not address issues in personal correspondence? d. Maybe it's worth forming an agenda for meetings and writing follow-ups afterwards? e. Maybe you should inform people in advance about the need for help or advice? f. Maybe we should decide when we start the working day, and especially when we finish? i. Because the statistics of remote work do not lie - people transplant, which is also not good SLA’s a. What is the time limit for responding to people in different situations? i. For example - for urgent questions the answer should be within an hour, for super urgent - you can immediately call a mobile and so on

21. Active Listening Ignoring Pretended listening (Patronizing) Selective listening Attentive listening Empathic listening If you have ever been ignored there is no doubt about it. You are talking but the other person is not giving any attention to what you are saying To truly hear someone takes time and attention. Pretend listeners give you the impression they hear what you say, and they may hear some of your words, but they are not "present." The next level is selective listening. The person who listens selectively only wants part of the message, but not all. They are probably the person who says, "So, what's your point?" Attentive listeners offer their time and attention. But they don't try to put themselves in the other person's shoes. Empathic listening is intentional. The person who develop this skill listens not only to the other person's words, they listen for what the other person means At the ﬁrst four (4) levels, the listener hears with their own frame of reference in mind. But it is at Level 5 that true communication occurs. This is where the listener attempts to see things from the other person's perspective or point of view, not with your own ﬁlter/lense.

22. Powerful questions What is at risk? What is important about that? What might help look like? What would a simpler way look like? What’s the worst best that could happen? What would an experiment look like? Which part is confusing surprising annoying you? What’s already working that you can build on? How do you want it to be? What is stopping you? If you got it, what would you have? In the bigger scheme of things, how important it is? In the beginning, how did you want it to be? What is the lesson from that? When is it time to action? What is your prediction? Whose opinion matters in this topic? Low power High power Yes / No Where Which When Who How What Why? https://medium.c om/the-liberators /how-to-use-pow erful-questions-v irtually-46a76096 630a

23. Preparation, opening, bargaining, closure Idea - opinion - interest - attitude Facts-based dialog, orbiter involvement, democratic approach Lose-lose, lose-win, win-win, win-lose Desired & worst cases for buyers & sellers 6 stages of the conflict Conflict stages BATNA & ZOPA Negotiation strategies Negotiation phases Conflict types Conflict moderation Negotiation skill

24. Motivation skill Intrinsic motivation Extrinsic motivation Moving Motivators Dilts pyramid Maslow's Hierarchy

25. Facilitation skill Meeting organizati on AIs Decision- making strategies Facilitation techniques Flow of the meeting User Personas

26. Public speaking skill Dialog structure Speech concept Non-verbal preparation Verbal preparation

27. Emotional Quotient & Vitality quotient Vitality & Rank potential Energy Level Hormones impact on behaviour Physiology aspect I'm ok, you're ok model Parent-adult-child model Transactional Analysis DISC & PAEI Proﬁles Maturity models Behaviour patterns

28. Communication tips & tricks We don’t have requirements Who can assist us with requirements? Do it Can you please assist us with this activity? It is not working We’ve made this & this. It didn’t help. We propose this It is critical problem It is an issue with high importance Hi. Thanks. Bye. Good afternoon. Many thanks, much appreciate that. Best Regards. You are wrong Let’s look on it from this perspective Will you do this? Activity is next. Risks are next. DD is next I need to think As a team we should brainstorm this

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Roman Humeniuk: Communication issues and their consequences in the day-to-day work (UA)

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