Vicky visits her brother Brent and his roommates Neal and Zach. She belittles Neal, who had an awkward high school nickname due to his robotic gait. Zach is smitten with Vicky but she finds him crude. Vicky criticizes Brent for living with his friends and not being ambitious. At the end, Neal and Zach defend Brent, saying he is ahead. Vicky storms out, still finding the guys immature.

1. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
Written by
Bryan Kett
episode 006

2. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
1.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM
Neal and Brent stare at a bowl of fruit on the coffee table.
ZACH
Are you kidding me? Look how much
better this looks.
Zach rearranges puts oranges on top in the bowl of fruit.
ZACH (CONT’D)
Now it looks amazing. Like I’m in a
tropical paradise or something. Like
this drink should have an umbrella in
it.
Zach swigs a plastic juice cup full of wine.
BRENT
Nobody puts oranges out to eat. This
isn’t a tiki bar. Look.
Brent moves the oranges to the bottom of the bowl and puts
apples on top.
BRENT (CONT’D)
This is rustic. Professional. It’s
like I’m in a Norman Rockwell
painting.
ZACH
First of all, that’s expected.
Challenge the status quo, man. Second
of all, who’s Norman? I thought you
said your sister’s name was Tindra?
BRENT
We’re leaving the apples. My sister’s
name is Vicky. And Tindra isn’t even a
real name. Besides, I don’t even think
that Vicky likes oranges.
ZACH
You don’t even know if your own sister
likes oranges? Rookie mistake there,
guy.
NEAL (O.S.)
Is she on her way?
Brent and Zach turn. While Brent has his back turned, Zach
sneaks an orange on top of the fruit bowl.

3. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED:
2.
BRENT
Why are you dressed like that?
Neal stands before them wearing khakis and drinking wine. His
hair is done.
BRENT (CONT’D)
Those are your interview khakis. Did
you dress up for my sister?
NEAL
What, these? No.
(beat)
Well, maybe. Yes. I don’t know.
Brent and Zach shake their heads.
NEAL (CONT’D)
I don’t need judgement from you two,
who I just heard literally comparing
apples and oranges.
ZACH
Pretty lopsided comparison.
BRENT
She doesn’t like oranges, Zach.
ZACH
I’m telling you, It. Looks. Super.
Tropical.
NEAL
And if you two must know, I’ve never
liked the way Vicky has thought about
me.
BRENT
Is this about high school? WhenStop.
NEAL
BRENT
In high school, Vicky was a senior
when we were freshmen. She got her
entire class to start calling Neal
Nerd-a-tron.
NEAL
It wasn’t the whole senior class.

4. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED: (2)
3.
BRENT
Seriously. It was everyone. Even some
of the cooler teachers started doing
it.
Zach laughs and eats and orange.
ZACH
Why Nerd-a-tron?
NEAL
Maybe it was because I was
academically focused. And I had
glasses and braces.
And...
BRENT
Neal sighs.
NEAL
Because I used to walk kind of
robotically.
BRENT
I didn’t see him bend his knees until
Junior yearZach, amused, keeps eating his orange.
NEAL
It was comfortable.
(beat)
And it’s all in the past. I’m not
going to keep paying for something I
did eight years ago. Tonight it
changes.
Brent exits.
ZACH
(to Neal)
So, did you, like, see yourself as a
nerd who acted like a robot, or a
robot who was good at math and stuff?
NEAL
That’s a ridiculous question. What
robot isn’t good at math?
Neal looks smug and has a sip of wine. There is a knock at
the door. Neal chokes.

5. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
4.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - FOYER - THAT MOMENT
Brent runs to the door. Neal adjusts his hair and tries to
casually sit on the arm of the couch. He crosses his legs,
straightens them out, and then crosses them again. Zach
starts quickly switching apples out for oranges.
Vicky (mid 20s, power suit, blue tooth) enters.
Hey, sis.
BRENT
He goes to give her a timid hug. She stiff arms him and hands
him her coat. She takes the glass of wine he is holding.
VICKY
No, you listen to me.
Okay...
BRENT
VICKY
You have two options here: do it, or
have me gnaw your face off.
BRENT
I’d be happy to do it, but I just
don’t know what “it” is.
Zach leans over to Neal.
ZACH
(sotto, to Neal)
How is Brent’s sister such a fox?
NEAL
What? Really?
ZACH
I’m into power.
Great.
VICKY
She takes out her blue tooth.
VICKY (CONT’D)
Come on, Brent. Blue tooth. Cowboy up.
BRENT
Right, right. Come in. Let me hang up
your coat.

6. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED:
5.
VICKY
Wooden hanger.
Brent walks away. Vicky enters the living room to see Neal
and Zach.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
VICKY
Well, if it isn’t Nerd-a-tron.
Neal looks up from pretending to flip through the pages of a
large book.
NEAL
Hello, Victoria. How was your trip?
VICKY
It was great. I left my high rise,
expensed a cab, and came to this dump.
Brent tells me you’re teaching now.
NEAL
That’s correct.
VICKY
Teaching what? How to eat lunch in a
bathroom stall by yourself? Or is it
just how to walk like a toaster would
if it had legs?
NEAL
As a matter of fact, I’m teaching
English.
Vicky sits on the couch and sets her glass of wine down on
the table.
NEAL (CONT’D)
And if you wouldn’t mind, please use a
coaster.
VICKY
I’m sorry. I wouldn’t want to do
anything to take away from the
ambiance of your home, like the beer
sign you clearly stole from a
convenient store.
She points to a crooked frat-esque beer sign hanging on the
wall.

7. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED:
ZACH
Free sign from a convenient store? Now
that’s what I call convenient.
Vicky turns to Zach for the first time.
VICKY
I’m sorry, what are you?
ZACH
Don’t you mean “who”?
VICKY
I meant what I said.
ZACH
Name’s Zach. Zach fish. Let me be the
first to say, I’m a huge fan of the
whole business-woman vibe.
Vicky rolls her eyes. Brent returns carrying a plate of
appetizers.
BRENT
I know how much you like bruschetta,
but please note that these are on mini
bagels, instead. I had to call an
audible when Zach took the baguette
and tried to use it as bait to catch a
pigeon.
(beat)
And that’s all you need to know about
Zach.
He points to Zach. Zach is ogling Vicky and winks at her.
ZACH
If you wanna go check the pigeon trap
later, let me know. And that’s not a
euphoria.
Euphemism.
NEAL
ZACH
It’s not that, either.
BRENT
Vicky, Zach lives with Neal and me.
Kind of like a people-helping-people
rehabilitation program.
Zach winks at Vicky again.
6.

8. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED: (2)
NEAL
How’s work, Victoria?
VICKY
Uh, I’m crushing it. Ever heard of
that?
Neal meekly nods.
VICKY (CONT’D)
Every day I cash checks and snap
necks.
NEAL
Yes, yes ma’am, I understand.
BRENT
I’m kind of doing the same. Not too
long ago I was promoted to be a Junior
Vice Assistant Intern.
Vicky scoffs.
VICKY
That’s your job title? Start demanding
power, Brent. Lose the “Junior” and
the “Assistant”.
NEAL
I’m the one in charge in my classroom.
Lots of power. Sometimes, my students
ask if we can have a night off from
homework and then I give them
homework. Gotta fall in line, know
your role. Right?
Everyone stares blankly at him. There is a silence for a
moment.
VICKY
So let’s see this place.
BRENT
Of course, why don’t you bring your
drink? Or would you like a refill?
Might I add, some fine wines come in
boxes. It’s a pretty baller move, so
don’t be alarmed thatVICKY
Just fill it up.
7.

9. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED: (3)
8.
She hands Brent her empty glass. He fills it up with boxed
wine. Zach raises his eyebrows at Vicky in lust.
NEAL
(sotto, to Zach)
Easy, big cat.
Vicky and Brent exit. Brent and Zach follow.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - BRENT’S ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
All four stand on the threshold of a tidy bedroom. A
monstrous television dominates one side of the room. There
are a pile of stress balls on the night stand.
BRENT
Here it is. Where I come to
contemplate and assess business
opportunities.
VICKY
And do weird stuff with stress balls?
BRENT
I’m on the edge a lot. The daily
grind, you know? Nothing like
unwinding with some reality TV and
some stress-B’s.
Vicky shakes her head and exits. Zach and Neal follow. Brent
walks over, squeezes a stress ball a few times, sets it back
down, and turns to follow them.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - NEAL’S ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
All four stand on the threshold of a bedroom. Papers and
books adorn a desk in the corner.
NEAL
I find it easy to get grading and
planning done in a professionallooking space.
Zach and Brent nod their heads.
VICKY
I’ll give you fifty dollars right now
if you can prove that you have no
action figures in your room.
Everyone laughs. Neal begins to close the door.

10. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED:
Well?
9.
VICKY (CONT’D)
NEAL
(trailing off)
I’m not really about money.
Neal closes the door.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - ZACH’S ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
All four stand on the threshold of a small, dark bedroom that
only has a mattress on the floor.
ZACH
Here she is. Simple.
VICKY
It smells like glue in here.
ZACH
Oh, for sure.
Neal sticks his head in.
NEAL
No furniture? Seems kind of juvenile.
BRENT
And no TV? Weird. Right, Vicky?
ZACH
Bedrooms are for two things, plowin’
broads and sawin’ logs.
Everyone stares at him in horror. Vicky exits.
NEAL
What was that?
ZACH
I don’t know. I got lost. She’s
amazing.
BRENT
Don’t. Just don’t.
INT. GUYS’ APARTMENT - KITCHEN
Vicky finishes her wine.

11. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED:
ZACH
The offer stands for me to show you my
pigeon trap, Miss. Check out those
baguettes in action.
VICKY
Oh, sweetie. I don’t want to see
anything that you have a passion for.
Her phone rings. She answers.
VICKY (CONT’D)
(into phone)
Let me call you back in 3. Just
wrapping up some charity I’m doing.
She hangs up.
BRENT
Big shot move, sis. Pulling the old
charity lie. I know that one.
VICKY
How was it a lie? I’m standing,
drinking boxed wine in a filthy
apartment that may or may not have a
pigeon infestation. Where’s my coat?
She exits the kitchen. Brent runs after her.
BRENT
But what are we going to do with the
pizzas coming? I ordered two.
NEAL
(calling after him)
It’ll be fine, man. I can man up and
have an extra slice.
Zach shakes his head. Vicky reenters with Brent trailing
behind.
VICKY
You need to get out of here, Brent.
You need to grow up. You’re behind.
Behind?
BRENT
VICKY
What, you think you’re getting ahead
living here in Never Ever land with
these children?
10.

12. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED: (2)
11.
NEAL
I hate to interrupt, but it’s actually
Neverland. Not Never Ever land. Common
misconception.
VICKY
Good to have you back, Nerd-a-tron.
Zach laughs.
VICKY (CONT’D)
What’s so funny, Perv-a-tron?
ZACH
A perverted robot?
VICKY
That’s right.
ZACH
I’ll take it.
Vicky rolls her eyes and begins gathering her things. Brent
stands by, silent.
NEAL
You know what, Vicky? Brent’s doing
great. He knows what he wants and he’s
out there getting it. Right Zach?
ZACH
(stumbling)
Big time. He’s got a bank account. And
he says “fiscal” all the time, like,
easily.
She stops packing up and stares at them.
VICKY
Maybe they’re right, Brent. You’re not
behind, you’re actually ahead of two
morons.
She storms into the living room. Brent stands speechless in
appreciation.
BRENT
I don’t know what to say, guys. Thank
you.

13. Mature
"Vicky's Visit"
CONTINUED: (3)
12.
VICKY (O.S.)
And get rid of all these oranges. It
looks like you’re trying to fight off
scurvy.
The door slams. The three guys stand there staring at each
other.
ZACH
Okay, so I guess you were right about
the whole apple thing.
END OF ACT