3. Parents often feel they are in trouble too.
STOP THINGS THAT HURT YOU
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4. Stop Living Through Your Kids
• Having dreams for your children does not
mean they want them
• You cannot be embarrassed by your kids.
Embarrassment is totally subjective.
• Just because you may have done the same
thing as your child doesn’t mean you have to
approve it.
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5. Stop Listening To Others
• Do not accept insulting or judgmental
opinions of your parenting.
• Defend your child without defending his/her
actions.
• Family and friends are the most likely to
remember where you went wrong. Do not
engage.
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6. Stop Isolating Yourself
• No matter how tempting do not cut yourself
off from the rest of the world.
• You are one of many parents dealing with
these issues. “Why me?!” is not useful.
• Anger and blaming become more common
when you “circle the wagons”.
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7. Take back your life.
START THINGS THAT HELP YOU
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8. Act like a grownup
• Appearance matters. Don’t dress like coming
to court is an every day event. (Work clothes
are always welcome!)
• Defend your child without defending his/her
actions.
• Stop complaining. Period.
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9. Start expressing your opinions
• I will NOT accept any judgment of my
parenting.
• No. We did not all do this when we were
his/her age.
• Thanks for your advice but we are working
with professionals.
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10. Reach Out To Others
•
• There is nothing better than talking with
people who know just how you feel.
• Parents new to the system are overwhelmed
and need the voices of experienced ones.
• Perhaps you don’t need help but someone
might need yours.
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11. Remember
Stop living through your kids.
Start acting like a grownup.
Stop listening to other people’s opinions.
Start expressing your own.
Stop isolating yourself.
Start reaching out to others who understand how you feel.
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12. www.victoriakamm.com 567.225.0877 victoria@victoriakamm.com
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