Conflict Management - This presentation was for participants in the Ottawa Catholic School Board Leadership part 1 course. The presentation outlines some of the causes of conflicts between adults in a school environment and strategies to best deal with conflicts.
18. “Peace does not mean an absence
of conflicts; differences will always
be there. Peace means solving
these differences through peaceful
means; through
dialogue, education, knowledge;
and through humane ways.”
Dalai Lama XIV
19. Some Benefits of Conflict
Innovative strategies
New knowledge
Different perspectives
25. Do you talk more or listen more when trying to resolve conflict?
26. Reasons for avoiding hard conversations
1. A Desire to Please
2. Personal Safety
3. Personal Comfort
4. Fear of the unknown
5. No sense of urgency
27. Reasons for avoiding hard conversations
6. I don’t fit in here
7. Waiting for the perfect moment
8. Perfectionism
9. Distrust of oneself and others
10. Lack of authority
28. Reasons for avoiding hard conversations
11. Distrusting our judgment
12. Fear of kicking somebody
who is already down
13. Too big a shift in role expectations
14. Not in the job description
15. Too close to home
29. Reasons for avoiding hard conversations
16. Conflict with Beliefs/values
17. Fatigue
18. Personality or intent
Presentation April 23rd to Ottawa Catholic School Board staff taking Leadership Part 1
We all know that our schools are happy places for adults to work
However, when you have adults working side by side, conflict is inevitable
Key part of the definition is two or more people don’t agree on something – and this happens all the time
2 minutes to discuss at tables
Review the many possible interactions and relationships between adults that take place in a school
Review this quote – discuss how the issue is really not the behaviour of the other person but how we react to what they say or to their actions
Ask people to stand if they know someone on their staff that is always happy no matter what is going on
Ask people to stand if they know someone on their staff that is always living under a “black cloud” no matter what is going on
Ask how most people deal with conflict – the answer is avoidance
Mention that the opposite of avoidance is the person who quickly resolves conflicts and chooses who is right and who is wrong and then moves on
Give example of Judge Judy who makes decisions all the time as to who is right and who is wrongAsk what the problem might be with this type of approach – relationship ends up damaged even more because there is a winner and a loser
Mention that everyone handles conflict differently and some strategies are better than others
Some people turn to prayer hoping the conflict will go away
Pause – Is conflict always a bad thing?
Give two minutes to discuss at tables
Large group review of responses
Review this quote – focus is that peace comes from resolving issues, challenges, and conflicts
Discuss the benefits of conflict
Pause – what are some causes of conflict
2 minutes at table to review and discuss
Large group review answers
Watch video clip – give credit to the Center for Work Life and encourage participants to visit their site
Mention the roles to resolving conflict, their own role, the formal vs informal role
Review this quote and the need to listen more than we talk when trying to resolve a conflict so that we understand all sides and perceptions
Refer to book – Having hard conversations and mention the reasons that most people avoid this type of conversationA Desire to PleasePersonal SafetyPersonal ComfortFear of the unknownNo sense of urgency
I don’t fit in here7. Waiting for the perfect moment8. Perfectionism9. Distrust of oneself and others10. Lack of authority
Distrusting our judgmentFear of kicking somebodywho is already downToo big a shift in role expectationsNot in the job descriptionToo close to home
Conflict with Beliefs/valuesFatiguePersonality or intent
Mention how many conflicts can be avoided if we learn to “not sweat the small stuff”
Confront the issue not the person – key focus
Mention that sometimes because of value differences, you will not get along, but agree to be professional in the workplace, and act respectfully
It is best to try and find a compromise so that both sides feel they have benefited in a joint solution
To collaborate both sides need to understand each perspective and agree on how to proceed
Review the key steps in mediation and that the role of the mediator is not to resolve the problem with their solution but rather to help the parties to come to a solution that they both can agree to
Encourage participants to keep learning by continuing with our Board leadership courses, our coaching courses, and mention that we will be working on mediation workshops and courses
In some cases we are dealing with harassment as opposed to workplace conflict, and when that happens, it is best to contact HR