Assertive communication

Assertive
Communication
&
Telephone Etiquettes

© L & D Cell-Microsec,2012

Module Objectives

• Explain the basics of communication.

• Identify the different types of communication.

• Identify the different styles of communication.

• Explain assertiveness.

• Identify their own assertiveness profile.

• Explain the benefits of assertive communication.

• Identify tips and techniques to develop assertive
Behaviour.

• Display the skills, attitudes and habits for emonstrating
Assertive Behaviour.
© L & D Cell-Microsec,2012 2

What is Communication?

Any perceived Behavior - or lack of Behavior in one person
that causes a "significant" mental, emotional, physical, or
spiritual reaction in another person is "communication."


Benefits of Good Communication

Good communication skills can result in the following benefits for an
individual:
 Improved Job Performance
 Success in interpersonal relationships
 Enhanced Personal Effectiveness


Verbal Communication

Verbal communication is a series of
expressive thoughts and perceptions
expressed through words.


Verbal Communication

Some things to be kept in mind in Verbal Communication are:
 Clarity of the message
 Be Concise
 Keep in mind:
 Must say
 Should say
 Might say
 Be Simple


Non – Verbal Communication

Non – Verbal communication constantly takes place amongst
individuals.

Even during a verbal conversation, non-verbal communication takes
place, through gestures, eye contact, facial expressions, clothing and
personal space.


Channels of Non – verbal
Communication

 Facial Expressions
 Verbal Paralanguage
 Kinesics
 Proxemics


Facial Expressions

Emotion Expression Description
Happiness Eyes Open and Crinkled
Mouth upturned

Sadness Watery Eyes
Mouth Turned Down

Anger Heavily Frowning brow
Scowling Mouth

Surprise Rounded Eyes
Open, O-shaped Mouth


Paralanguage

Different shades of speech including tone, pace and
voice modulation are known as Paralanguage.

 Tone of Speech
 Rate of Speech


Kinesics


Proxemics

The study of spatial territory for the purpose of communication uses
four categories for informal space:

 The intimate distance for embracing or whispering (6-18 inches),

 The personal distance for conversations among good friends (1.5-4
feet),

 Social distance for conversations among acquaintances (4-12 feet),
and

 Public distance used for public speaking (12 feet or more).


Enhancing Non – Verbal Communication

 Because gestures can both compliment and contradict your message,
be mindful of these.

 Eye contact is an important step in sending and receiving messages.
Eye contact can be a signal of interest, a signal of recognition, even a
sign of honesty and credibility.

 Closely linked to eye contact are facial expressions, which can reflect
attitudes and emotions.


Enhancing Non – Verbal Communication

 Posture can also be used to more effectively communicate your
message.

 Clothing is important. By dressing for your job, you show respect for
the values and conventions of your organization.

 Be mindful of people‘s personal space when communicating. Do not
invade their personal space by getting too close and do not confuse
communications by trying to exchange messages from too far away.


Roles

Follow this simple acronym to display Non – Verbal
messages:

R Remain Relaxed
O Adopt an Open Position
L Lean towards the person while speaking
E Maintain Good Eye Contact
S Face People Squarely


Assertiveness

“Interpersonal Behavior (verbal and non-verbal) in
which a person expresses him/herself and his/her
needs in such a way that the rights of others are not
infringed upon.”


Benefits of Assertive Communication

Assertiveness can be effectively used while:

 Negotiating.

 Resolving conflict and defusing anger.

 Implementing/explaining controversial policy.

 Communicating tough decisions.

 Solving problems.

 Establishing boundaries, balance.

 Dealing with aggressive, passive and passive-aggressive behaviour.


What keeps one from being assertive?

 Insecurity of others – in terms of age, rank and seniority.
 Expectations.
 Past experience.
 Fears:
 Causing harm to self or others.
 Causing loss to self or others.


Assertiveness is an art that needs to be
practiced continually.

―Each practice opportunity is also an opportunity
to feel good about oneself for speaking up and
feeling good about oneself is a step toward
building self esteem."


My Assertiveness Profile

The four communication styles depicted through this tool are:

 Aggressive
 Passive
 Receptive
 Assertive


The Assertiveness Matrix
High

Aggressive Assertive

High
Understanding
Low

Passive Receptive

Enthusiasm

Low

Passive Behaviour

 An individual with this Behavior tends to use low enthusiasm and low
understanding levels.

 He normally keeps to himself or remains quiet and unassuming in
most discussions or in meetings with others.

 When directly engaged, he may often concede to more aggressive
types.

 He is generally emotionally dishonest and does not convey his feelings
to others openly.

 Since he does not communicate openly, he ends up feeling hurt or
anxious.


Passive Behaviour

Possible body language used:
• Leaning back

• Hands clasped or arms crossed

• Eyes averted or watching the broad scene with fleeting looks and
possible sighs.

• While talking to others, they allow themselves to be interrupted.


Passive Behaviour

Strengths

 Effectively analyzes discussions or debates.

 Can listen effectively.

Weakness

 Ignores/sacrifices own rights.

 Stays silent rather than speaking up.

 Can feel inept at times.


Aggressive Behaviour

 An individual with this Behavior uses high enthusiasm and is low on
understanding.

 His primary objective is to be in control.

 To achieve this, they may tread on others rights or feelings.

 Such individuals may fail to listen to others.



 Invades space

 Loud voice

 Arms crossed or moving aggressively

 Very direct eye contact or even staring

 Interrupts others while speaking

 Subordinates others and tries to make others feel small and
insignificant

 Stereotypes others and makes statements to that effect.



Strengths
 Confident and commanding when required.

Weakness
 May often be insensitive to others rights and needs.
 May adopt a sarcastic or hostile attitude.
 Interrupts or talks over others without listening.


Receptive Behaviour

 An individual with this Behaviour uses high understanding and low
enthusiasm.
 He tends to offer gentle comments and suggestions in discussions and
conversations.
 He is more interested in finding out about other people and in building
better relationships.
 He may avoid jeopardizing a positive conversational climate to push
even their important points too hard.


Receptive Behaviour

 Open posture
 Good eye contact
 Friendly
 Smiling
 Some use of hands when speaking and concentrating, so as to
listen properly.


Receptive Behaviour

Strengths
 Keeps the discussions and conversations calm and friendly.
 Gently offers a lot of ideas and suggestions.

Weakness
 May not come to the point about what they need or want.
 May become upset in the face of high aggression or anger.


Assertive Behaviour

 An individual with this Behaviour uses high enthusiasm and highly
understanding.

 He usually has high feeling of self-esteem and is aware of his personal
needs and rights.

 He states his needs, wants and feelings in an honest manner.

 At the same time, he is also sensitive to others needs and rights.

 He will first listen to others attentively before firmly communicating
his message.


Assertive Behaviour


 Relaxed

 Slightly leaning forward posture and lots of use of the hands

 Good eye contact and confident, usually modulated voice.

 Usually nods, and questions the other person while listening to them.

 Appropriately uses tools like paraphrasing to display his active
listening skills.


Assertive Behaviour
Strengths

• Takes action towards achieving the result without denying others
rights.

• Pro-active and solution oriented to always find a positive way forward.

• Demonstrates that he values the feelings and needs of others.

• Listens effectively.

Weakness

• May not coach others who are less assertive.


Correct Answers

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Correct Answers
ISV‘B JZZXYH BPJB BPH SVQE UJE

DON’T ASSUME THAT THE ONLY WAY

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TO WIN IS TO COMPETE. SOMETIMES

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THE BEST WAY TO WIN IS TO

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COOPERATE WITH OTHERS.


The Communication Continuum

Passive Assertive Aggressive

Lose - Win Win – Win Win – Lose


The Communication Continuum

According to the communication continuum:

 Being passive means that an individual dismisses his personal rights
in favor of the rights of others.

 Being aggressive means that the individual values his personal rights
higher that those of others, who may ultimately feel dominated or
humiliated by his communication.

 Communicating assertively generally means that both parties feel
satisfied and valued.


Traits of an Assertive Person

The person:

 Clearly defines his needs and wants in his communication.

 Makes statements convey respect for the listener.

 Sends messages that have no hidden agenda – what he says is
what he means to say.

 Has the ability to initiate, continue and terminate conversations.


Traits of an Assertive Person

The person:

 Has the ability to maintain eye contact.

 Has an erect posture, clear speech and uses facial expressions
and gestures effectively to emphasize on his communications.

 Possesses the ability to say No.

 Has the ability to ask for favors and make requests.

 Has the ability to express positive and negative feelings.


Components of Assertive Behaviour

 Enthusiasm used while communicating with others.

 It includes both verbal and non-verbal elements.

 Understanding indicates the level of understanding sought by an
individual in communication.

 It includes understanding of both feelings and views of the other
person.


Types of Assertions

There are four different types of Assertions:

 Basic Assertion

 Empathic Assertion

 Escalating Assertion

 I – Language Assertion


Assertiveness can be depicted in a variety of ways. A person
can display assertive Behaviour through his:

 Behaviour

 Verbal cues

 Body Language


Behavioural Techniques

 Stand up for your basic rights.

 Assume responsibility for your own feelings (Use ‗I‘ statements)

 Behave like a ―Broken Record‖ continually stating your own feelings,
needs, wants and desires.

 While listening to other people use the active listening style.



 Demonstrate empathy.

 Identify the problems in Behavioural terms.

 Focus on and brainstorm solutions.

 Be willing to evaluate options.

 Be aware of the boundaries.

 Be aware of the choices and the consequences.

 Trust in the outcome.



 Make requests and ask for favors.

 Refuse requests if they are unreasonable.

 Accept both compliments and feedback.

 Develop a value and belief system that allows you to assert yourself.


Verbal Cues

 Agree on matters assertively.

 Use factual descriptions instead of judgments.

 Avoid exaggerations.

 Keep a level, well modulated tone of voice.

 Be specific.


Verbal Cues

 Stand up for your opinions and stick to them.

 Resist giving into interruptions before completing your own thoughts.

 When saying ―No‖ be decisive.


Body Language

 Be aware of other‘s body language as well as your own.

 Maintain a good posture and eye contact. But ensure that the eye
contact does not seem as if you are glaring at the individual.


Body Language

 Keep your posture open and relaxed and make sure that your
expression matches with the message you are conveying.

 Stop self – limiting Behaviours, such as smiling too much, nodding too
much, tilting your head, or dropping your eyes in response to another
person‘s gaze.


Four Step Behaviour to being more
Assertive

 Prepare for assertive encounters with the right facts and skills.

 Organize yourself with rehearsals.

 Put your skills to practice.

 Learn from the outcomes of being assertive in a variety of situations.


Assertiveness Entails

 Respectful communication

 Both parties are committed to and comfortable with final plan

 Agreeing to disagree—room for difference

 Unique power dynamic

 Both parties finish communication with integrity intact

 Compassion


Assertiveness in a Team

In a team situation use Assertiveness to:

 Think Win-Win. What is best for you and the team?

 Include statements that illustrate the benefits to the team.

 Respect your team members.

 Share your knowledge and ideas with the team.

 Point out potential problems in a constructive way.

 Enable processes that move the team toward its goals.


End of Day 1

Telephone
Handling Skill


Objective

At the end of this course you will be able to
• Handle telephone calls professionally

• Identify the stages of a telephone call

• Understand the importance of verbal and nonverbal attentiveness

• Process calls skillfully

• Handle assertive, aggressive and passive callers effectively

• Learn how to combat stress

• Make positive impact with telephone


Becoming my
Organization’s voice
Ambassador


Are you an onion or an artichoke?


Quality, Quality! But Hurry Up!!

Challenges faced by executives:
• Quality
• Speed


Becoming my organization’s voice ambassador?

For effective telephone handling, you need to know the
following:
• Stages in a telephone call

• Verbal and non verbal attentiveness over the phone

• Call processing skills


Stages of a
telephone call!


Stages of a telephone call

The four stages of a telephone call:
1. Stage one: A verbal handshake
2. Stage two: Collecting information
3. Stage three: Action
4. Stage four: A verbal goodbye


Wake - Up, the
customer needs you!


Wake - Up, the customer needs you!

It is very important to make your customers feel that
somebody is listening to them. It involves both your verbal
and non-verbal attentiveness.


Wake - Up, the customer needs you!

Vocal factors
Vocal factors are an essential part of the communicated message. Following are the various
vocal factors that affect your communication :

• Tone

• Rhythm

• Clarity

• Timing/Pace


Wake - Up, the customer needs you

Verbal attentiveness
Verbal attentiveness is another important element of strengthening the personal
bond with a customer. Remember the following points when talking to the
customer:
• Tell the customer what you are doing and how long will it take. Remember
87% of self talk is negative.
• Tell what you can do and not what you can’t
• Use “and” instead of “but”
• Compliment the customer


Skillful Call
Processing!


Skillful Call Processing

Call processing is a skill that needs to be mastered. Today's
telephones, from a basic home telephone set to sophisticated
business sets, have features that can be business tools in our
"toolbox" of communication skills. Call Hold, Call Transfer, Call
Forwarding, Three-way Calling, Speed Dialing, Voice Mail, and other
features of most modern systems can enable us to provide fast,
efficient, courteous service to our customers.


Skillful Call Processing

Whenever you make or receive a call, you must keep the following things in mind:
• Know who you are talking to
• Speak the truth
• Have a positive attitude
• Avoid keeping the customer on hold
• Synchronize between the customer’s message and your computer
• Inform before transferring calls
• Leave Clear Voice Mail messages


Transferring Calls

• Get the correct name of the person who is calling in and the person whom
he/she wishes to talk to.

• Politely ask the person to hold on.

• If the person’s line is busy inform the caller. Do not put on hold for too long.

• Ask the person as to whether you can help in any way or whether there is any
other person you can pass the phone to.


Transferring Calls

• When transferring calls, tell the person who the call is forwarded to, the name
and purpose of the caller.

• Give an option to call back if he/she has to hold on for too long.

• Give him/her the option that you would take down the number and ask the
concerned person to call back


Combat Stress!


Combat Stress

Stress comes in all shapes and sizes, and has become so pervasive, that it seems to
permeate everything and everybody. But you cannot let it affect your work. You need to
combat stress. There are various ways in which you can relieve yourself of stress.
Some of them can be using proper breathing techniques, confidence in your ability and
an optimistic view about yourself.


Combat Stress

What does your breathing indicate

Your breathing is the first element that will give you clues about your stress level.

• Sighing is a sign of frustration.
• Holding your breath indicates that some kind of discomfort is building and it needs
release.
• Yawning tells that there is too much carbon dioxide in the body.


Wandering mind

Your mind has a tendency to wander. You can bring yourself back to work by
doing any of the following simple exercises:

• Drink a glass of cold water.
• Go to the rest room and wash your hands.
• Write or type yourself a welcome-back note!
• Say out aloud to yourself or anyone in earshot, ―I am back!‖
• Touch and feel the fabric of your clothes.
• If thoughts persist, write them down. Offload what is on your mind
that could take you away from the present.
• Smile as widely as you can. Give service with a smile. It does get
noticed even by someone over the phone who can‘t see you.


Every call first call

If a communication with a customer is bothering you, you can do any of the following to get
rid of it:
• Toss the call in the garbage (figuratively).
• Tell someone about it.
• Visualize a shredder and put the conversation in the shredder.


Compliments

Customers do compliment and when they do, you must:

• Thank the customer.
• Ask him, what made him say so. Following are some ways in which you can
ask this::
 “Thank you, what did I specifically do that you liked?”
 “What was it that had you take the time to tell me this?”
 “Was there something special I did this time?”


Compliments

Keep the feeling and share
Whenever you make a good call and the customer compliments you, you must keep the
good feeling.

Remember: Whatever you focus on expands.


What do you do when push comes

• Ask for guidance
• Be well rested
• Be prepared
• Breathe deeply
• Keep your wrap-up time to a minimum


Assertive
Communication !


Three behavior styles callers often demonstrate on
the telephone:

 Assertive
 Aggressive and/or irate
 Passive


Assertive communication

Express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in direct, honest ways
that do not violate another person's integrity.


Aggressive Communication

Express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in ways that humiliate,
degrade, belittle, or overpower the other person


Passive Communication

Express honest feelings, thoughts, and belief or express
them in such an apologetic, or self effacing way that others
can easily disregard them.


Fundamental
Tips For
Telephone
Handling

Tips for fast talkers

Here are some tips for fast talkers:
 Pace yourself. After every 20 to 30 seconds, ask for a response with
questions like:

 Are you with me?

 Am I answering your question?

 Am I making myself clear?

 Am I going too fast?

 Am I going too slow?

 Eliminate the commonly used words or phrases, such as ―You know‖,
―Basically speaking‖, ―To be honest‖.


Tips for fast talkers

When asked to repeat, don’t repeat the same
words over and over again.


Some General Tips On Telephone Handling

 Use your name as well as the customer’s. “My name is Mary, I’m calling
from…….” “Is this your official address, Ms. Miller.”

 Repeat the information gathered to confirm your perception of it.

 Be courteous and empathic

 Have a friendly and courteous approach

 Use voice modulation to create desired effect



 Never have food or tea while talking over the phone – it makes a very lousy
sound at the other end.

 Wait for the customer to hang the receiver first

 Answer the phone within 2 rings, but not on the first ring

 Never keep the customer waiting or on hold for more than 30 seconds



 In case of longer hold periods – inform the customer on the time that will be
taken.

 Concentrate on the phone call – do not try to do too many things at the
same time.

 Prepare yourself with all the details before making the call.

Remember – time is precious


Voice Modulation

• Speak clearly - pronounce words clearly.

• Relax-pause and stop to breathe.

• Vary the tone / pitch of your voice.

• Speak slowly.

• Smile to add expression to your voice.

• Repeat message/address/phone number.

• Be enthusiastic.


7Ps of Telephone Handling

1. Promptness - answer phone within three rings.

2. Politeness - greet cheerfully, apologize for any delay.

3. Preparation - have all information, paper and pencil handy (product,
prices, delivery dates etc.)

4. Precision - be precise and factual.

5. Professionalism - handle customer‘s problem - not yours.

6. Practicality - Give what the customer needs.

7. Positive -Use questions which confirm need of the product to get
your customer to buy.


Basic Telephone Etiquette

 Adopt proper etiquette and mannerisms based on gender, region, time
and objective of call. ‗Good morning/ evening/‘

 Never have food or tea while talking over the phone – it makes a very
lousy sound at the other end

 Wait for the caller to hang the receiver first.

 Answer the phone within 2 rings,

 Never keep the customer waiting or on hold for more than 30 seconds

 In case of longer hold periods – inform the customer on the time that will
be taken

• Concentrate on the phone call – do not do too many things at the same
time.


Action Plan

• 2 things that you would START
doing

• 2 things that you would STOP doing

• 2 things that you would KEEP doing


Assertive communication

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