Are you leading people or are you leading people with EQ? In this short but empowering leadership training, AndyTheCoach from AsiaTrainers.com will teach you the 5 ways to emotional intelligence and how you can lead people easily and happily

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EQ for
Leadership
Andy Ng CA MBA
Business Coach & Trainer
Asia Trainers
www.asiatrainers.com

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Your Business Coach Andy NgYour Business Coach Andy Ng
• CA with MBA from UKCA with MBA from UK
• 29 years in training,29 years in training,
consultancy and coachingconsultancy and coaching
• Former Director of Finance &Former Director of Finance &
HR of Japanese MNC AlliedHR of Japanese MNC Allied
Telesis International (Asia)…Telesis International (Asia)…
• Specializes on 3 topics:Specializes on 3 topics:
Sales, Executive &Sales, Executive &
ManagementManagement
• Also leading a team of 4 in aAlso leading a team of 4 in a
global e-commerce businessglobal e-commerce business
www.facebook.com/An

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Blog: www.AndyNgTrainer.blogspot.sgBlog: www.AndyNgTrainer.blogspot.sg
Videos: www.youtube.com/AndyNgCoachVideos: www.youtube.com/AndyNgCoach
FaceBook:FaceBook: www.fb.com/AndyTheCoachwww.fb.com/AndyTheCoach
Join My Private Group 4321

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My Articles, Videos, Courses, Profile
at www.asiatrainers.com

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Quality of LeadershipQuality of Leadership
= Quality of Team= Quality of Team

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1. Why most leaders are leaning, not leading:
Leadership and Self Deception
2. How to Get Out of the Box: Lead with EQ
3.3. Emotional Intelligence: doing your testEmotional Intelligence: doing your test
 The 5 Realms of EQ: Intra-personal, Inter-The 5 Realms of EQ: Intra-personal, Inter-
personal, Adaptability, Stress Managementpersonal, Adaptability, Stress Management
and General Moodand General Mood
 Intrapersonal Realms: Self-awareness,Intrapersonal Realms: Self-awareness,
Assertiveness, Self-regard, Independence andAssertiveness, Self-regard, Independence and
Self-ActualizationSelf-Actualization
 Interpersonal Realms: EmpathyInterpersonal Realms: Empathy
4.4. What to Do When people don’t follow you?What to Do When people don’t follow you?
EQ for LeadershipEQ for Leadership

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Why People Don’t Do What You Say?Why People Don’t Do What You Say?

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1. We see Others as
Objects, not people
2. We stay ‘in the box’ by
seeing things as self-
justifying images
• See people who challenge
these images as threats
as those who reinforce
these images as allies
3. We deceive ourselves
by focusing on
ourselves
4. Result: Low effectiveness

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True Leaders MakeTrue Leaders Make
People Better than ThemselvesPeople Better than Themselves

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Definition of Emotional IntelligenceDefinition of Emotional Intelligence
IQ is a measure of a person’s
intellectual, analytical,
logical and rational abilities.
It concerns verbal, spatial,
visual and mathematical skills
EQ is a measure of
your skills other than IQ

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Mindful or Mind full?

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Assertive in 3 Tools of Communication
Direct Words with
Ownership
Firm Voice with
Lower Tone
Look into the
Eyes, Stable
Posture

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3 Ways to Be Assertive3 Ways to Be Assertive
1.1. Know YourKnow Your
FeelingsFeelings
2.2. CommunicateCommunicate
Your FeelingsYour Feelings
3.3. EmpathizeEmpathize
Don’t PretendDon’t Pretend Attendee FluAttendee Flu
 Use ‘I’ not ‘You’Use ‘I’ not ‘You’
 Factual Descriptions, notFactual Descriptions, not
judgments or exaggerationsjudgments or exaggerations
 Express thoughts, feelings orExpress thoughts, feelings or
opinions reflecting ownershipopinions reflecting ownership
 Use clear, direct requests orUse clear, direct requests or
directives instead of hinting ordirectives instead of hinting or
presumingpresuming
ListenListen
Case: Despite countless teachings, your colleague still makes the
same mistake in quotation. How do you tell her with such impact
so that she will not repeat the mistake again?

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Self Regard vs
Self Esteem

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Living
Your
Dreams or
Living In
Your
Dreams?

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EmpathyEmpathy
• Not Sympathy or Pity
• Feeling with a person and
understands his feelings from
that person’s perspective
• How to Improve Your Empathy?
Take away your Pride and
Sense of Righteousness

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Even if you have no empathy
towards another person, do not
think bad about them
Your Thoughts about himYour Thoughts about him
will affect how he treats you …will affect how he treats you …
A simple experiment …

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Simple Way to have EmpathySimple Way to have Empathy

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DISC Behavioural

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25. Reality Testing: What Do You See Here?Reality Testing: What Do You See Here?

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Is All Stress Bad?Is All Stress Bad?
Moderate levels of stress actually improvesModerate levels of stress actually improves
performance and efficiency: Positive Stressperformance and efficiency: Positive Stress
called Eustresscalled Eustress
Too little stress results in boredomToo little stress results in boredom
Too much stress may cause anToo much stress may cause an
unproductive anxiety levelunproductive anxiety level
Do Not Eliminate Stress,Do Not Eliminate Stress,
Manage It InsteadManage It Instead

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Optimum WorkOptimum Work
AbilitiesAbilities
BurnoutBurnout
BoredBored
ChallengesChallenges
Find the Optimum BalanceFind the Optimum Balance
Between Challenges and AbilitiesBetween Challenges and Abilities

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Start
Success
Failure
Perturbation
Positive Quit
Break Through

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Self-Coach for Daily HappinessSelf-Coach for Daily Happiness
1. What are you grateful for today? 3
things ….
2. What are you saying to yourself when
things go wrong?
3. What can you let go? People? Bad
feelings? Bad memory?
4. What good do you see in others? How
can you leverage on them?
5. What can you do for others?

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Daily Affirmation for HappinessDaily Affirmation for Happiness
1. I am fulfilled and joyful
2. I am the source of my own
happiness
3. I am at peace with myself and
others
4. I love to smile
5. I am cheerful and blissful

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Top 10 Ways to Develop Your EITop 10 Ways to Develop Your EI
1.1. Label Your Feelings (not people or situation)Label Your Feelings (not people or situation)
2.2. Distinguish Between Your Thought and Feelings (“I feelDistinguish Between Your Thought and Feelings (“I feel
like” vs “I feel”)like” vs “I feel”)
3.3. Take 100% Responsibility for Your Feelings (“I feelTake 100% Responsibility for Your Feelings (“I feel
jealous” vs “You’re making me jealous”)jealous” vs “You’re making me jealous”)
4.4. Be Passionate and Yet Understand Others’ FeelingsBe Passionate and Yet Understand Others’ Feelings
Toward Your PassionToward Your Passion
5.5. Respect Other People’s Feelings (there’s always a reasonRespect Other People’s Feelings (there’s always a reason
behind what they do)behind what they do)
6. Turn Anger into Energy6. Turn Anger into Energy
7.7. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be UnderstoodSeek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
8.8. Ask “What If” Questions instead of merely “Why”Ask “What If” Questions instead of merely “Why”
9.9. Don’t Criticize without Acknowledge FirstDon’t Criticize without Acknowledge First
10.10. Use Your Ultimate Power: Choose Your FeelingsUse Your Ultimate Power: Choose Your Feelings

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Whatever the SituationWhatever the Situation
Make People Think and Feel TheyMake People Think and Feel They
Are Smarter than YouAre Smarter than You

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The 7 Most Common SituationsThe 7 Most Common Situations
Leading: Tell and Correct
Leading with EQ: Ask for Feedback
Leading: Assign
Leading with EQ: Attract people to
Volunteer
Leading: Push for Deadlines
Leading with EQ: Pull people
Leading: Set Goals and Ask people to Hit
Leading with EQ: Guide people to set their
own goals and achieve rewards

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The 7 Most Common SituationsThe 7 Most Common Situations
Leading: Mark performance
Leading with EQ: Make performance
Leading: Resolve conflicts
Leading with EQ: Restore relationships
Leading: Manage service
Leading with EQ: Lead service
Ask yourself this question: am I getting people
to do better than what they think they can?

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Another 4 CommonAnother 4 Common
SituationsSituations
Leading: Tell and Correct
Leading with EQ: Ask for Feedback
Leading: Ask what’s wrong
Leading with EQ: Ask what’s right
Leading: Follow blindly
Leading with EQ: Right understanding first
Leading: Get Hardworking people do more
Leading with EQ: Inspire people, systemize,
leverage, re-structure, self-service etc

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What to Do When Others Don’t Follow You?What to Do When Others Don’t Follow You?
1.1. Re-examine Yourself – are you a Real Leader or JustRe-examine Yourself – are you a Real Leader or Just
a Pusher?a Pusher?
2.2. If there is nothing wrong with you, do you have theIf there is nothing wrong with you, do you have the
right team? Is your team trained on Followership?right team? Is your team trained on Followership?
3.3. Do you have the right vision?Do you have the right vision?
4.4. Do you have enough action? (e.g. too much ‘soft’Do you have enough action? (e.g. too much ‘soft’
skills, not enough specific skills)skills, not enough specific skills)
SW-SW-SW – Enjoy the JourneySW-SW-SW – Enjoy the Journey

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1. Why most leaders are leaning, not leading:
Leadership and Self Deception
2. How to Get Out of the Box: Lead with EQ
3.3. Emotional Intelligence: doing your testEmotional Intelligence: doing your test
 The 5 Realms of EQ: Intra-personal, Inter-The 5 Realms of EQ: Intra-personal, Inter-
personal, Adaptability, Stress Managementpersonal, Adaptability, Stress Management
and General Moodand General Mood
 Intrapersonal Realms: Self-awareness,Intrapersonal Realms: Self-awareness,
Assertiveness, Self-regard, Independence andAssertiveness, Self-regard, Independence and
Self-ActualizationSelf-Actualization
 Interpersonal Realms: EmpathyInterpersonal Realms: Empathy
4.4. What to Do When people don’t follow you?What to Do When people don’t follow you?
EQ for LeadershipEQ for Leadership

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Blog: www.AndyNgTrainer.blogspot.sgBlog: www.AndyNgTrainer.blogspot.sg
Videos: www.youtube.com/AndyNgCoachVideos: www.youtube.com/AndyNgCoach
FaceBook:FaceBook: www.fb.com/AndyTheCoachwww.fb.com/AndyTheCoach
Thank You, See You Again!