1. 1 The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
Children are often the forgotten victim in a domestic violence incident. They may not be directly
abused but they still carry the scars, the displacement, and confusion. Children of domestic
violence can become either extremely introverted or extremely extroverted.
You may even see signs of disruption in the child’s eating or sleeping
patterns. Another major disruption to the child may be a change in their
emotional and social behavior. In this worksheet, we will discuss how
domestic violence affects children.
Learning Objectives:
Through this activity, you will:
 Learn how domestic violence affects children
 Identify children’s emotional / behavioral changes
 Create a action plan on how to communicate coping skills with your children
Facts
What are the facts about children who witness or live in a home with domestic violence?
 “Every year an estimated 3.3 million to 10 million children are exposed to domestic
violence in their home.” -Moylan, Herrenkohl, Tajima, Herrenkohl, and Russo, (2010).
 Children are more aware of domestic violence and its consequences than parents or
guardians realize.
 Most parents/guardians may recognize the negative effect of their child witnessing an act
of domestic violence but they usually do not seek help for their child.
 Domestic violence is not limited to one type of ethnic, social, religious, or educational
groups-- any family can experience domestic violence.
Check point
Read and answer the following questions.
Did your child/children witness the domestic violence incident?
How did you explain the domestic violence incident to your child/children?

2. 2 The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
Behaviors
What is the emotional impact of domestic violence on your children?
It is extremely important to help your child cope with the family violence and their own
responses to the situation. The following three areas should be addressed:
1. Acknowledge the child’s feelings. Boys typically externalize their emotions as girls tend
to both externalize and internalize their emotions.
2. Recognize the change in the family dynamics, allow time for an open discussion about
the changes.
3. Embrace the child’s coping responses. In order for children to develop into healthy
adults, they must feel confident in their surroundings and themselves. Allowing them the
time to cope and response on their own (with your guidance) will increase their
confidence.
Research indicates there is a connection between the duration of domestic violence in the
home to the intensity of emotional impact stated by the child.
Source: Thornton (2014) Understanding the Emotional Impact of Domestic Violence on Young Children
Impact on Children's
Feelings Include:
• Low-Self Esteem
• Social Withrawal
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Anger
• Confusion
Impact on Family
Dynamics Include:
• Support available for
child
• Communication and
togetherness
• Divided loyalties
• Routine and predictability
• Security
Children's Coping
Responses Include:
• Keeping adults close
• Acceptance and Self-
reliance
• Taking responsibiliy

3. 3 The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
Infants and Toddlers
Being exposed to domestic violence in the home can deeply affect an infant or toddler. The
types of behaviors that develop for this age group are “excessive irritability, immature behavior,
sleep disturbances, emotional distress, fears of being alone, and regression in toileting and
language.” (Newton, 2001). As the child enters into the
preschool age, they may begin to wet the bed or have
speech difficulties (such as stuttering). During this
developmental stage, children are learning how to trust
being in a household with domestic violence interferes with
this process and affects the child’s future independence.
Teens
The impact of living in a home with domestic violence on a
teenager can have destructive and life-long effects.
Teenage years tend to be a very social time in our lives and
fitting in with peers is a priority to this age group. If a
teenager is living in a household with frequent domestic violence they may isolate them self
from peers to hide their home life or stay away from home to avoid the family violence. If courts
are involved, the teenager may also be forced to change their living situation; this displacement
may involve attending a new school and strain their social relationships. This strained can
hurt/break family trust and relationships. As a result, the teenager may not learn how to form
trusting, lasting relationships, or the teen may become involved in violent relationships with their
future partners.
Source: http://www.findcounseling.com/journal/domestic-violence/domestic-violence-children.html (2013)
Check point
Read and answer the following questions.
List 3 possible behavioral changes in a child living in home with domestic violence? (Select one
age group: Infants, toddlers, or teens)
How do children/ teens cope with domestic violence?
Have you or your children experienced any of these behavioral changes?
Teens
Toddlers
Infants

4. 4 The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
Action Plan
What can you do differently?
Since children are unable to verbalize what they are feeling, especially those of traumatic
experiences, they will typically use drawings to release their feelings. Research has suggested
that children living domestic violence feel isolated, ignored, and struggle to express their
feelings. Creating an open environment for your child to share his or her emotions and thoughts
is critical.
Teaching your child safety techniques such as conflict resolution skills, how to recognize healthy
and unhealthy relationships patterns, and learning to express anger in a positive form will help
build his or her resilience.
Check point
Using the information, you’ve learned at Acacia Counseling Center regarding these safety
techniques fill in the questions below to create your action plan
Explain how you can teach your child conflict resolution skills? What conflict resolution skills
will you teach them?
List 3 healthy and unhealthy relationship patterns you can share with your child?
How can you teach your child positive ways to express their anger?
“The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few
minutes of their time each day.” -M. Grundler

5. 5 The Impact of Domestic Violence on Children
Bibliography
Information for this handout was provided from the following sources:
Hill, A., (2002). The impact of domestic violence on children's psychological well-being. Dissertations/Theses;
Information Analyses Doctoral Research Paper, Biola University. P.52-55
Retrieved from: http://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/ED473726.pdf
Moylan, C., Herrenkohl, T., Tajima, E., Herrenkohl, R., & Russo, M., (2010). The effects of child abuse and
exposure to domestic violence on adolescent internalizing and externalizing behavior problems. Journal of
Family Violence,25 (1), p53-63.
doi: 10.1007/s10896-009-9269-9
Newton, C. J., (2001). Domestic Violence: An Overview. Mental Health Journal. Retrieved from:
http://www.findcounseling.com/journal/domestic-violence/domestic-violence-children.html
Thornton,V. (2014). Understanding the emotional impact of domestic violence on young children. Educational
& Child Psychology,31(1), 90-100. Retrieved from http://0-eds.a.ebscohost.com.leopac.ulv.edu/