This document provides guidance on overcoming shyness and intimidation in 4 parts: 1. Understanding shyness - Shyness often stems from weak self-image, lack of confidence, and being preoccupied with others' opinions. It involves accepting one's shyness and identifying anxiety-inducing triggers. 2. Conquering your mind - Focus on others, visualize success, practice good posture and speaking clearly, and emphasize personal strengths rather than comparing to others. 3. Conquering social situations - Get informed, think of conversations in stages, start conversations, appear approachable through smiles and eye contact. 4. Challenging yourself - Set small daily goals, find

1. OVERCOMING
SHYNESS &
INTIMIDATION

2. OVERCOMING SHYNESS &
INTIMIDATION
Part 1 : Understanding Your Shyness
Definition:
Shyness is a state of being nervous or timid in the company of people.
1. Think about the root of your shyness:

3. Contd.
 Shyness doesn’t necessarily mean being an
introvert or not liking yourself.
 It means for some reason you get embarrassed
when the spotlight (attention) is on you.
Roots of Shyness
Shyness is generally symptoms of a larger
problem;
 Weak Self-image
 Lack of belief in complements
 Preoccupied with what people will say about your
performance
 You are labelled as shy by others

4. 2. Accept your shyness

5. Contd.
 The 1st step in overcoming a problem
is accepting that you have a problem
 Accept that you are shy & be
comfortable with it
 The more you resist it consciously or
unconsciously, the longer it prevails

6. 3. Figure out your triggers
What or which situations triggers your shyness most. Do
you become shy;
 In front of new audience?
 When learning a new skill?
 When venturing into a new situation?
 When surrounded by people you know & admire?
 When u don’t know anyone somewhere? Etc.
Definitely you do not feel shy in all situations. You may be
okay around family & friends b’cos you know them better.
So try hard to see strangers as family & friends
Meaning it may not be you who is shy but situations make
u shy.

7. 4. Make a list of situations that
make you feel anxious
Anxiety is a feeling of worry,
nervousness, or unease about
something with an uncertain outcome.
List them from the things that make you
feel the least anxious to those that that
cause you the most anxiety

8. Anxiety Situations
For example, ‘talking in front of people’
may be a trigger but u can be more
specific;
 Talking in front of those who have
authority
 Talking to those u find attractive
 Talking to those who are older
 Talking to those who are more educated
than you
 Talking to ladies/guys, etc.

9. 5. Conquer the list
 Once the list is completed, start
working through them.
 Start dealing with the easy situations
to boost your confidence
 Take it at your own pace, no rush
 Try a few times on each one even if
you are successful before you move to
the next on the list
 Don’t worry about the setbacks

10. Part 2: Conquering your mind
Always know that your are the ruler of your mind.
 Place your attention on others (esp. people you are familiar
with)
- Concentrate on compassion. Felling sympathetic or
even empathetic helps boost your confidence
 Visualize success – Keep your focus on the crown, the
praise & recommendations
 Practice good posture – It has the tendency to boost your
confidence. Your body emulates your feeling. Research
shows that good posture makes us feel authoritative,
confident & reduces stress.
 Practice speaking clearly to yourself – Loving hearing
yourself or your own voice (eg. Record yourself). Practice
makes habits
 Don’t compare yourself to others – Develop your own self
esteem
 Identify your social values & strengths and take advantage of
them. SWOT

11. Part 3: Conquering Social
Situations
1. Get informed –
- read wide & often
- Ask questions
- Know your environment

12. Contd.
2. Think of conversations in stages
Stage 1: Simple opening line, small talk
at its finest
Stage 2: Introductions. Shd be self
explanatory
Stage 3: Find some common ground, a
topic you can both discuss but
pick your strengths
Stage 4: Closing – summing up &
exchanging information

13. Contd.
3. Start the conversation
4. Look & act approachable
- Keep your smiles visible
- Have a friendly atitude
- Keep your arms uncrossed
- Be polite at all times
5. Smile & make eye contact

14. Part 4: Challenging Yourself
 Set goals for yourself
- Focus on small, daily accomplishment
- Gradually become more daring
 Find your comfortable zones – place,
topic, environment, etc.
 Practice placing yourself in the not-so-
comfortable zones
 Introduce yourself to one new person
each day
 Put yourself out there