1. Writing to Describe
‘Conflict’

2. 15 lessons
L1 What is ‘riot’?
word types - fire, explosions, crowds, etc etc etc
L2 thoughts and feelings/perspectives police/rioter/photographer
conditionals – emotive language
L3 senses
connectives – connotations of colour and weather
L4 senses
semi-colons – onomatopoeia
L5 sentences for effect
short sentences – hyperbole
L6 Fig language
commas – mets, sims, personification, hyperbole
L7 Paragraphs
short paragraphs – linking signposts
L8 Draft
L9 Draft

3. Writing Assessment Objectives
For Assignments 1, 2 and 3 (also see reading objectives for Assign. 3)
Band 1 (36–40):Confident and stylistic completion of challenging tasks throughout the
Portfolio
Band 2 (31–35): Frequent merit and interest in the choice of content and the manner
of writing
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
Band 4 (21–25): Satisfactory content with brief development and acceptable
expression
Band 5 (16–20): Simple writing, the meaning of which is not in doubt
Band 6 (11–15): Writing can be followed despite difficulties with expression

4. B1 W1: Candidates describe and reflect effectively upon experience, give detail and
analyse thoughtfully what is felt and imagined. Arguments are cogent and developed
in mature, persuasive thought.
B2 W1: Candidates describe and reflect upon experience and analyse with occasional
success what is felt and imagined. Some argument is well developed and interesting,
although the explanation may not always be consistent.
B3 W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed
in a competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some
of them.
B4 W1: Candidates express with some clarity what is felt and imagined. Arguments are
relevant to the topic and are developed partially with some brief effectiveness.
B5 W1: Candidates express intelligibly what is felt and imagined. Arguments are
expressed with variable relevance, logic and development.
B6 W1: Candidates make a simple attempt to express what is felt and imagined.
Arguments are expressed very simply and briefly.

5. B1 W2/5 (paragraphing): Facts, ideas and opinions are ordered logically, each stage in the
argument or narrative carefully linked to the next. Paragraphing is a strength, and
candidates are confident in experimenting where appropriate in the structure of
expressive writing.
B2 W2/5 (paragraphing): Facts, ideas and opinions are often well ordered so that the
construction of the writing is clear to the reader. Sentences within paragraphs are mostly
well sequenced, although some paragraphs may finish less effectively than they begin.
B3 W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in
an orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
B4 W2/5 (paragraphing): There is evidence of overall structure, but the writing may be
presented more carefully in some sections than in others. There may be examples of
repetition and the sequence of sentences within paragraphs may be insecure in places.
B5 W2/5 (paragraphing): Facts, ideas and opinions are presented in paragraphs which
may be inconsistent. The overall structure is unsound in places.
B6 W2/5 (paragraphing): Facts, ideas and opinions may appear in partially formed
paragraphs of inappropriate length and some attempt is made to provide a beginning
and an end.

6. B1 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write with assurance, using a wide range of
effective vocabulary and varied, well-constructed sentences.
B2 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write with some confidence, demonstrating an
emergent range of varied vocabulary and some fluency in the construction of sentences.
B3 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
B4 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write with occasional competence, using a
mixture of effective and straightforward vocabulary and some complex and some simple
sentences.
B5 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates use simple straightforward vocabulary. Simple
sentences are correctly used and there may be an attempt to write complex sentences
which have a slight lack of clarity.
B6 W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates use simple, mainly accurate vocabulary.
Attempts to write complex sentences may involve repetition of conjunctions and some
blurring.

7. B1 W4: Candidates vary their style with assurance to suit audience and context in all
three assignments.
B2 W4: Candidates give evidence of understanding the need to write appropriately to
audience and context even if there is not complete consistency in the three
assignments.
B3 W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a
sense of audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
B4 W4: Candidates show occasional evidence of writing with some understanding of
audience and context, but this is not sustained.
B5 W4: Candidates make slight variations of style according to audience and context,
although this does not seem deliberate.
B6 W4: Candidates may show occasional, brief acknowledgement of the possibility of
writing for different audiences and contexts, but overall there is little variation of style.

8. B1 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates write accurately. They use
punctuation and grammatical structures to define shades of meaning. They spell simple,
complex and technical words with precision.
B2 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates show some signs of
understanding how punctuation and grammatical structures can be used to aid
communication. Errors of spelling, punctuation and grammar are minor, and rare at the
top of this band.
B3 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.
B4 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): They use a limited range of punctuation and
grammatical structure with some care, although occasionally grammatical error will cause
the reader some difficulty. There may be quite numerous errors, particularly of sentence
separation and the misuse of commas.
B5 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates show knowledge of simple
punctuation and grammar, but the amount of error, especially of tense and the use of
prepositions, is sometimes considerable. Sentences separation is often poor, but error
does not prevent the reader from
understanding what is written.
B6 W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates occasionally use appropriate
punctuation and can spell simple words, but the reader is not convinced that their
understanding, especially of grammar, is adequate.

9. Reading marks for Assignment 3
Band 1 (9–10) Candidates analyse and evaluate several ideas and details from the
text(s), and develop lines of thought. Their own ideas are closely related to the original
text(s) and show a good understanding of the main arguments.
Band 2 (7–8) Candidates respond in detail to ideas from the text(s), explaining them and
expressing views on them with varying degrees of effectiveness. There is some reference
to details in the original. Their own ideas are based on those of the original text(s).
Band 3 (5–6) Candidates show some response to the ideas in the text(s), summarising
them and giving simple views on them. Their own thinking is relevant, if not always
tightly focused on the original text(s).
Band 4 (3–4) Candidates give a response to the original. Their ideas are relevant to the
topic but make only occasional references to individual ideas or details in the original
text(s).

10. Lesson 1

11. DO IT NOW…
Layers of meaning.
Like the ice of an
iceberg which is
mostly hidden, often a
word has lots of
meaning that is hidden
below the surface.
What meanings does
the word ‘conflict’
suggest to you?
Conflict

12. Physical conflict in riot
LO:
1 - To understand how to express thoughtfully
what is felt and imagined.
2 – To understand I can expand my vocabulary by
using different word types.
Outcome: notes recording events of a riot and emotional
responses to those events
Complete table:
Noun
Adjective
fearful
aggression
anger
violence
violent
Verb
Adverb
fearfully
violently
horrifically

13. Divide your page into 4 quarters. Label the quarters
Nouns – ex. fire, kick, violence
Adjectives – ex. fierce, violent
Verbs – ex. burn, kick
Adverbs – ex. fiercely, violently

14. Using the images, record as many different words
as you can in 5 minutes.

15. Developing basic sentences:
Noun phrases – The fierce fire
Verb phrases – burned violently
And, express ideas thoughtfully with effective sentence
openings:
Horrifyingly, the fierce fire burned violently.
Angrily, the aggressive rioters smashed windows violently.
And, don’t forget the sentences we looked at last term,
starting with ‘ed’ and ‘ing’

16. B2 W1: Candidates describe and reflect upon
experience and analyse with occasional success what is
felt and imagined
B3 W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and
imagined and supply some detail, explanation and
exemplification for the benefit of the reader.
B4 W1: Candidates express with some clarity what is
felt and imagined.

18. Lesson 2

19. DO IT NOW…
What was the photographer thinking/feeling?
What was the subject thinking/feeling?
What makes you think that?

20. LO: 1 - To understand how to develop emotive
language to express thoughts and feelings about
events
2 – To understand how model verbs can create
effect.
Outcome: Description of riot from a specific 1st person
viewpoint

21. Conditionals in the past tense:
should have could have might have would have
Finish these sentences:
I should have phoned the police but/when/if…
I could have phoned the police but/when/if…
I might have phoned the police but/when/if…
I would have phoned the police but/when/if…
What are the effects these different conditionals create?

22. Emotive language – making your reader ‘feel’ something
The calm policemen walked slowly towards the busy teenagers
Change the underlined words and rewrite the sentence
a – to make the police seem threatening and the teenagers
vulnerable
b – to make the police seem frightened and the teenagers
aggressive

23. should have could have might have would have

24. We can choose to write in the 3rd person
The calm policemen walked slowly towards
the busy teenagers
Which is useful if we want to share everything – but
this can seem impersonal.
OR, we can choose to write in the 1st person
Calmly, I walked slowly towards the busy
teenagers
How does this create a different effect?

25. 1st or 3rd person, which would create a more emotive effect?
Write a paragraph, describing this scene, from the
viewpoint of the policeman, rioter or photographer.
And, use conditionals to show how you were feeling.

26. B2 W1: Candidates describe and reflect upon experience
and analyse with occasional success what is felt and
imagined.
B3 W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and
imagined and supply some detail, explanation and
exemplification for the benefit of the reader.
B4 W1: Candidates express with some clarity what is felt
and imagined.

28. Lesson 3

29. Do it now…
In 20 words, what’s his story?

30. LO: To explore different ways to generate ideas
Outcome: To decide on an idea for the task and start to
plan
Sound progress: Simple idea
Excellent progress: Developed idea with clear direction

31. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/crime/8699993/UK-riots-A-festival-ofbroken-glass.html
Watch the first 5:30 minutes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-wyANyRG10
BBC3, 60mins, culturally diverse opinions
What common story are both the presenters telling?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HjWifAuTwJg
6mins, 4 youths, on the riverbank
What story are the boys telling?

32. The L.A. Riot
*Hung jury – Can’t come to a decision
**Conflagration - Fire
Batons flailing, curses and wailing;
Senses wrung, *jury's not hung.
Verdict shocking, nation rocking:
Anger and tears, hate and fears. Tempers wearing, passion flaring;
Pent up anguish through the years.
**Conflagration, torches flung,
Cries of bitterness are sung. Riots peaking to a stage
of utter chaos in rage.
Burning, looting, senseless shooting;
If in the way, one dies that day. Guns reloading, minds exploding;
Your time has come ... You cannot run.
City burning, stomachs churning;
Panic, fright throughout the night. Dreams are shattered, burned and battered,
Once a goal now burned out hole.
Violence reigns thru' tears and pain;
Smoke is dense ... It makes no sense. We cry for peace and quick release
From all this strife and loss of life ...
Is Merle
But hate and greed this night is theirs
a – a rioter,
To burn and kill ... Not hear our prayers.
b – a police officer,
c – an observer?
Merle W. Kinne
How do you know?
How does she feel about the event?

33. Decision time…
1 – Who will you write as?
a – a rioter
b – a police officer
c – an observer
2 – What will be your attitude?
a – anger
b – fear
c – confusion

34. Write your opening sentence(s)
- Hook your reader
- Use interesting words (see poem)
- Use interesting sentence structure(s)

35. Sound progress: Simple idea
Excellent progress: Developed idea with clear direction

36. Lesson 4

37. DO IT NOW…
Order the story structure:
The firemen put out the fire.
I was on the bus, on my way into town.
There were traffic jams and people everywhere
I was with my mate, Jack.
There was a huge, raging fire where the restaurant
used to be.

38. Learning Objective: To understand how to structure an
effective narrative
Outcome: To plan the structure for the narrative
Sound progress: For my story, I have an introduction,
development and ending
Excellent progress: I have a 5 part story structure

40. Rewrite this narrative poem in 5 lines (5 part story)
Riot
A riot is the language of the unheard.
—martin luther king
John Cabot, out of Wilma, once a Wycliffe,
all whitebluerose below his golden hair,
wrapped richly in right linen and right wool,
almost forgot his Jaguar and Lake Bluff;
almost forgot Grandtully (which is The
Best Thing That Ever Happened To Scotch); almost
forgot the sculpture at the Richard Gray
and Distelheim; the kidney pie at Maxim’s,
the Grenadine de Boeuf at Maison Henri.
Because the Negroes were coming down the street.
Because the Poor were sweaty and unpretty
(not like Two Dainty Negroes in Winnetka)
and they were coming toward him in rough ranks.
In seas. In windsweep. They were black and loud.
And not detainable. And not discreet.
Gross. Gross. “Que tu es grossier!” John Cabot
itched instantly beneath the nourished white
that told his story of glory to the World.
“Don’t let It touch me! the blackness! Lord!” he whispered
to any handy angel in the sky.
But, in a thrilling announcement, on It drove
and breathed on him: and touched him. In that breath
the fume of pig foot, chitterling and cheap chili,
malign, mocked John. And, in terrific touch, old
averted doubt jerked forward decently,
cried, “Cabot! John! You are a desperate man,
and the desperate die expensively today.”
John Cabot went down in the smoke and fire
and broken glass and blood, and he cried “Lord!
Forgive these nigguhs that know not what they do.”
Gwendolyn Brooks

41. Plan the structure of your story:
Opening
Development
Complication(s) Climax
Resolution
(One sentence per section)

42. Sound progress: For my story, I have an introduction,
development and ending
Excellent progress: I have a 5 part story structure
(mark books)

43. Lesson 5

44. DO IT NOW…
Which title best suits your story. Choose one and explain.
• The voice in my head
• Don’t judge me
• In my world
• Missing the point
• Terrorised

45. LO: To understand how to write an effective opening
Outcome: Students write an interesting opening
and develop the following paragraphs
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in
a competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of
them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense
of audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

46. •
•
•
•
•
The voice in my head
Don’t judge me
In my world
Missing the point
Terrorised
1 Discuss how these titles could link to the theme
of ‘Riot’
2 Write the title for your story – use above or write
one of your own

47. How do these openings hook the reader in?
Despite the absence of any visual evidence, the acrid smell of something burning
hung heavy in the air, indicating the devastation of what was happening two streets
away.
Crash! The plate glass window shattered into millions of tiny diamonds.
‘C’mon’ cried Matt, from the speaker of my mobile. ‘They’re breaking into Currys;
they’re going in through the smashed windows’.
I don’t know what came over me. Normally, I wouldn’t dream of doing anything like
that but…. Well, that night, everything was mad… Out of control…. Adrenalin started
pumping through my veins. I just got caught up in the excitement of it all.
Untroubled, I’d kissed my daughter goodnight before going on duty that night. We’d
had dinner together then my wife had cleared the kitchen whilst I’d put Sophie to
bed and eventually, I’d left them, safely at home, to start a night shift.
Description
mystery
humour
emotive image
dialogue
repetition
short tense sentence
rhetorical question

48. Write the opening to your story.
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in
a competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of
them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense
of audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

49. Lesson 6

50. DO IT NOW…
Write a list of the 5 senses?
And what about the sixth?

51. Learning Objective: To understand that well chosen
words and phrases clarify meaning.
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in
a competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of
them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense of
audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

52. Figurative language is the use of
implicit language (you’re
Giving an inanimate object living
implying/suggesting).
characteristics
Figurative devices are:
An extravagant or exaggerated statement
Comparing something to something else
Similes
Using opposites for emphasis
Metaphors
Using an image of one thing to emphasise
Personification
the image of something else
A word that sounds like the noise it is
Hyperbole
describing
Onomatopoeia
An oxymoron (freezing heat)
Match them to the definitions

53. Identify the figurative language from this
extract from a GCSE A* answer
It was then that we noticed that what we had
thought was an innocent grey cloud was, in
fact, a moving swirling mass that swirled more
quickly than any cloud we had ever seen
move before. As if as one, we suddenly
realised that it wasn't a cloud at all: it was
smoke - thick, dark, haunting smoke. There
was a fire somewhere - surely a huge fire! And
everyone was pushing and shoving to get a
closer look at what was going on.

54. Write sentences (using figurative language) to describe:
the smell of fire…
the taste of fire…
the sound of fire…
the sight of fire…
the feel of fire…
the emotional effect of fire…
Giving an inanimate object living characteristics
An extravagant or exaggerated statement
Comparing something to something else
Using opposites for emphasis
Using an image of one thing to emphasise the image
of something else
A word that sounds like the noise it is describing

55. Continue writing your story – the development of character
and setting – use figurative language
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in
a competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of
them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense of
audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

56. Lesson 7

57. DO IT NOW…
Rewrite this with punctuation:
I don’t know what came over me
normally I wouldnt dream of doing
anything like that but well that night
everything was mad out of control
adrenalin started pumping through
my veins i just got caught up in the
excitement of it all

58. Learning Objective: To know how to use a variety of
sentences to improve our writing
Outcome: To use a range of sentences and punctuation for
effect
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in a
competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense of
audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

59. Compare the lengths of sentences: What different
effects do the create for the reader?
I don’t know what came over me. Normally, I wouldn’t
dream of doing anything like that but…. Well, that
night, everything was mad… Out of control….
Adrenalin started pumping through my veins. I just got
caught up in the excitement of it all.
Despite the absence of any visual evidence, the acrid
smell of something burning hung heavy in the air,
indicating the devastation of what was happening two
streets away.

60. Carry on writing your story – the complication –
use a variety of sentences and punctuation.
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in a
competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense of
audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

61. Lesson 8

62. LO: To understand basic words should be
spelt accurately
Outcome: All writing has been checked for
mistakes
Same letters, different sounds
They’re/there/their
To/two/too
Our/are
Same sound, different letters

63. Carry on writing – Climax
Band 3 (26–30): Competent writing with some development of ideas
• W1: Candidates express clearly what is felt and imagined and supply some detail,
explanation and exemplification for the benefit of the reader. Arguments are expressed in a
competent series of relevant points and a clear attempt is made to develop some of them.
• W2/5 (paragraphing): A clear attempt is made to present facts, ideas and opinions in an
orderly way, although there may be some insecurity in the overall structure.
• W3/5 (sentence structures): Candidates write competently, using appropriate if
sometimes unadventurous vocabulary and writing sentences that mostly link ideas
successfully.
• W4: Candidates make a clear attempt in at least one assignment to write with a sense of
audience and there may also be some evidence of adapting style to context.
• W5 (spelling, punctuation and grammar): Candidates use punctuation and grammar
competently although the range is not strong. There may be a number of minor errors
especially at the bottom of this band and even occasional errors of sentence separation.

64. Lesson 9

65. Learning Objective: To know how to write a well managed ending that fits the writing
Outcome: To compete the first draft