If you're one of the lucky ones who Facebook thinks has been hacked and you now find yourself stuck in the insane loop of trying to remedy your problem while still trying to protect what little privacy you might still have, you're not alone.

1. WHY FACEBOOK’S “CHECKPOINT”
ACCOUNT SECURITY SUCKS SO BAD
Hollis Thomases

2. MY SITUATION, MY COMPLAINT
 About a month ago, in early July 2013, I was trying
to remove content administrators of a Facebook
page I own.
 After clicking the “Save” button, I was asked to
enter my password (the same password I had used
to log into my account, mind you)
 At this point, Facebook served me a pop-up
informing me that my “account may have been
hacked” and to take security measures to solve the
problem.
That’s when my fun started…

3. FIRST I GOT AN EMAIL…

4. INAPPROPRIATE REQUESTS
 Originally when I clicked on the link, I was
taken to a Facebook page asking me to
upload a photo of myself on one of the
following personally identifiable pieces of
information (as if I would?! This is Facebook
after all.):
 A driver’s license
 A passport
 A state-issued identification card
 A military-issued identification card
 An immigration card with a signature

5. MY ONLY OTHER OPTION?
 Since I wasn’t about to upload any of those pieces
of personal information to Facebook, I clicked on
the link that indicated I might have other options
 My other option was to “log on from Chrome
browser for Windows XP that you used on May
23, 2013 and May 28, 2013”
 OK, this was totally creepy, and…
 I routinely use at least 3 different computers and when I
do log in using Chrome, it’s usually in Incognito mode so
I think Facebook wouldn’t even connect the dots, right?
 I try to log in using Chrome on all three computers.
Nothing works.

6. AT THIS POINT I SAID “SCREW
FACEBOOK! I DON’T EVEN CARE
ABOUT THIS ACCOUNT ANYWAY!”

7. FAST-FORWARD ONE MONTH
 I was on the phone with a colleague recounting this
ridiculous story, when I got curious. “Let me try to
log-on again, and see what I get this time,” I told
her.
 Using one of my 3 same computers and Chrome
browser in Incognito mode, I then tried to log in.
 This time, I documented the entire process.
More fun & games with Facebook...

8. THE SAME INITIAL WARNING…
So I clicked the Continue button…

9. A NEW VERIFICATION PROCESS?
 Instead of being asked to upload photo ID, now I
was given a choice of 3 was to prove I was who I
said I was:

10. THE PROBLEM WITH MY CHOICES
 First of all, I joined Facebook in 2007 when
Facebook didn’t give a hill of beans about your
security. It didn’t even use a secure URL at that
time!
 To my recollection, I never created a Security
Question and I am positive that I never intentionally
uploaded a credit card to Facebook
 In in the off chance I did, it’s quite likely that in the 6
years since joining, that credit card # would have been
discontinued or cancelled.
 Many of the “Friends” I’m connected to on
Facebook aren’t serious friends at all. In 2007, the
only people I could Friend with were other Internet
marketing professionals.

11. SO I ROLLED THE DICE…

12. CHOICE #1: SECURITY QUESTION
 My first choice was to attempt the security question.
I was asked a question about my schooling.
 I answered the question 100% accurately (I took
out my scrapbook just to verify I was)
 Facebook said I failed my answer

13. CHOICE #2: CREDIT CARD VERIFICATION
 Just as I thought, I didn’t recognize this # at all. It
could have been mine, but it’s not any of my current
credit card #s.
Guess I failed ID test #2, too.

14. CHOICE #3: IDENTIFY YOUR FRIENDS
 So with this final option, I was told I’d be
shown photos of friends I had to identify. I
had to identify 5 friends accurately, but I
could choose to skip twice without penalty.
That’s all I was told.
 Still on the phone with my colleague and
laughing all along about this, I started my
test.

16. CHOICE #3: IDENTIFY YOUR FRIENDS
 In no more than 5 minutes, I accurately identified 5
out of 5 friends, not skipping a single one –
hooray, right?
WRONG! Facebook said I took too much time
doing so! WTF?!!

18. FACEBOOK’S LACK OF LOGIC
 While it keeps me locked out like this, Facebook’s
illogic still sends me non-stop email notifications
about the goings-on of my connections:

19. APPARENTLY THIS STUPIDITY HAS A NAME
 It’s called “Checkpoint,” as in the URL
https://www.facebook.com/checkpoint (Facebook
will automatically redirect this URL to its home page
unless your account is locked and you’re trying to
log in)
 Apparently, I’m not the only one with a problem:
 http://allfacebook.com/malware-checkpoint-locked-
accounts_b94434 (July 2012)
 http://www.pcworld.com/article/259216/facebook_securit
y_checkpoint_hits_roadblock.html (July 2012)
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvgOsIfOkCg

20. FACEBOOK APPRECIATES MY FEEDBACK
 If you happen to get sick of the mind-numbing loop
of verification attempts, you can click on a link
below the box saying, “I can’t get out of this flow.”
 What does this do for you? ABSO-FREAKIN-
LOUTELY NOTHING! It just launches a pop-up
where Facebook thanks you for your feedback.

21. MY CONCLUSIONS
 Facebook remains an
abomination that really
cares little for its users
 Facebook has long
since been of little
value to my life
 I’m fine with Facebook
and me parting ways
permanently
 Need to contact me?
 @hollisthomases
 LinkedIn
 .