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Outlook of a father
1. Outlook of a Father
“If his sons are honored, he is not aware of it; if they are in disgrace, he does not
know about them. Only his own flesh pains him, and his soul grieves for him.” JOB
14:21
At this time of Father’s Day, we celebrate honoring grandfathers, fathers and
celebrating fatherhood and paternal bond. For nearly one century, families have
celebrated Father’s Day. A Presidential Proclamation by President Lyndon B. Johnson in
1966 designated the third Sunday of June as Father’s Day. President Richard M. Nixon
signed a 1972 bill, making the holiday legal, official and permanent, (Linda Ann
Nickerson, Yahoo Contributor Network).
Fathers influence our society, no matter how simple it may be. Done through their
work and raring of their children, they all contribute to society.
Like a farmer, fathers plow and plant the seeds while mothers sprinkle the water
during growth. Fathers straighten the branches and prune the leaves. He cuts down the
tree in order to sprout again and for its tender shoots not to cease. Fathers could be the
seed. This seed comes as knowledge, principles, and philosophies in life that a father
should pass on to their children. The seed could be the hard work and sacrifice for the
sake of his children. Fathers are not just role models for their children; they live with
them through cooperation and mutual respect. Fathers should strive to seek first to
understand their children to be understood. Understanding comes from feedback. It is not
a matter of who is right; it is a matter of which one works best for both. It is not I win and
you lose. In this generation of digital technology, it is win-win that counts.
2. Together with mothers, fathers build confidence into his children. Children look at
fathers for wisdom. “Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth
understanding.” Proverbs 3:13. When this happens children receive their father’s
blessing. Fathers are not perfect, but not always wrong. Being the older one, he passed
the test of time. What he says has been proven right, because he has learned this from his
mistakes. He has shaped his life by his failures and victories.
Fathers do strange things to encourage their children to excel. Realize that father and
child form a team system, which is composed of parts that are inherent components of the
system. The behavior of the system, when all the components play, is different from
when both components doesn’t participate. The father-child team undergoes learning
curve before performing. As in team building, they go through, Forming, Storming,
Norming, and Performing stages. Depending on their learning curve and motivation, this
process could take a long time. Others may take a shorter time if they have that passion.
In my case, my stage from forming, storming, to norming took half of my life. I think that
this happens to all parents. For lack of experience and time, their family building happens
concurrently as they both learn each other as husband and wife. Fathers are in the process
of learning all the time. Up to now at 77 years old, I’m still learning my life, my wife and
my children. It is a process of ongoing improvement.
Fathers are disappointed if they can’t motivate their children. However, realize that
motivation is driven by people’s want and that it’s hard to motivate children if fathers
don’t know their children’s want. People are born with intrinsic motivation, self-esteem,
desire to learn, creativity, joy in accomplishing, and the need for freedom and belonging.
As people are in a state of want all the time, children are. Their want is driven by their
3. needs. After that need is satisfied, their next unsatisfied need will drive their motivation.
Understanding this theory (Competitive Edge book, 2011, by Jose Villanueva Alcedo,
page 11, Publish America, USA), a father can only provide the environment, but he could
not directly motivate his children.
A father gives courage in trying times. He offers steadfast bold faith in God and solid
leadership in the home through scriptural teaching. A father’s affirmation of his strong
faith comes during the celebration of Father’s Day.
Celebrating Father’s Day encompasses various practices of family gathering, greeting
cards and gifts. Based on my upbringing, I’m used to just a sincere word of love and
encouragement for a father, like me, to keep going. I love inspiring Bible verses as the
Scriptures clearly reveal. Following Promises for Fathers from the Bible:
A Father’s Integrity: “I know, O my God, that you put hearts to the test and that you
take pleasure in uprightness.” 1 CHRONICLES 29: 17, (NAB)
A Father’s Courage: “I command you: be firm and steadfast! Do not fear nor be
dismayed, for the Lord, your God, is with you wherever you go.” JOSHAU 1:9 (NAB)
A Father’s Father: “Sing to God, praise the divine name; exalt the rider of the
clouds. Rejoice before this God whose name is the Lord. Father of the fatherless,
defender of widows – this is the God whose abode is holy.” PSALM 68:5-6 (NAB)
Father’s Compassion: “As the father has compassion on his children, so the Lord
has compassion on the faithful.” PSALM 103:13 (NAB)
Father’s Legacy: “For the Lord will defend their cause, and will plunder the lives of
those who plunder them. Be not friendly with a hotheaded man, nor the companion of a
wrathful man.” PROVERBS 23:23-24 (NAB)
4. A Father’s Wisdom: “On the way of wisdom I direct you, I lead you on
straightforward paths. When you walk, your step will not be impeded, and should you
run, you will not stumble. Hold fast to instruction, never let her go, keep her, for she is
your life.” PROVERBS 4: 11-13 (NAB)
A Father’s Blessing: “When a man walks in integrity and justice, happy are his
children after him. “ PROVERBS 20:7 (NAB)
A Father’s Fruit: “In contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience,
kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
GALATIANS 5:22-23 (NAB)
A Father’s Love: “ Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, love is not
pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-
tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices
with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing; if tongues, they
will cease; if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing.” 1 CORINTHIANS 13: 4-8
(NAB)
This is what Father’s Day means to me. Thank you all for having me.