LDS Mentors Launch Event Training 27th June 2013

Hyde Park, Reading, St Albans, Watford Stakes
Launch Event Training
Thursday 27th June 2013
LDS Mentors Launch Event
Watford Chapel

“Each of us, from time to time, is mentored and has
chances to mentor. In my experience, truthful and
caring one-liners that occur within such nurturing
relationships have a long shelf life! You can probably
recount three or four examples of how people have
said something—probably a sentence or clause—
and you remember it still. It moves and touches you
still.”
Elder Neal A. Maxwell
Jesus, the Perfect Mentor
Ensign, Feb. 2001, 8.
LDS Mentors Launch Event Training
An apostolic prospective

Agenda
 Our mission and the sacred nature of working
with our young people
 What does/does not being an LDS mentor
entail?
 A framework for mentoring
 How to conduct a mentoring conversation
 Q&A session

“…you should study and prepare for your life’s work
in a field that you enjoy, because you are going to
spend a good share of your life in that field. It
should be one which will challenge your intellect
and which will make maximum utilization of your
talents and your capabilities. Finally, it should be a
field that will supply sufficient remuneration to
provide adequately for your companion and your
children. Now that’s a big order. But I bear
testimony that these criteria are very important in
choosing your life’s work. “
President Thomas S. Monson
CES Fireside for Young Adults: Life’s Greatest
Decisions, 7 September 2003
A Prophet’s voice

Our mission is to provide mentoring and career insight to those who are seeking help
in exploring their career and educational options, with specific emphasis on returned
missionaries and Young Single Adult members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-
day Saints.
The LDS Mentoring Initiative aims to:
 Bring experienced professionals into contact with young people at the outset of
their professional and educational development.
 Promote education and career advancement amongst LDS Young Single Adults
through a Mentor connection.
 Bring experienced professionals into contact with others where required at
significantly crucial points in their professional and educational development.
 Provide a national resource available to individuals, families, Priesthood
leaders and LDS Employment Services.
Our Mission

“Brethren, there is no organization better able to
respond to the challenges of humanity than the
priesthood of the Most High God. We have the
organization. Stake presidents, bishops, elders
quorum presidents, and high priests group leaders—
we now call upon you to mobilize our priesthood
quorums in response to the employment and
financial challenges facing our members.”
Bishop Richard C. Edgley,
Conference Report: “This Is Your Phone Call”, Apr.
2009
A call to action

The sacred nature of working
with our young people

...is very simple....
 A need is recognised...by the future
mentee or a trusted advisor (parent,
Priesthood leader, other)
 The Stake LDS Mentors Co-ordinator is
approached
 A mentor is identified (firstly within a
stake and then beyond where there is a
need)
 The mentor is approached and if he/she
is willing to take on the mentee then the
mentee is encouraged to make contact
with the mentor
...and that is where the fun starts...
The process for connecting the
mentor and mentee…

 Necessarily finding the mentor a job
 Take on the ownership and responsibility for
the Mentees career, decisions or life
 Prejudging the viability of a Mentees ideas
 Adopt a judgemental attitude
 Creating false expectations
 Doing most of the talking
 Thinking as Mentor we know everything
What does being an LDS
mentor NOT entail?

mentor entail?
LDS Mentoring should lead a Mentor and a Mentee to
partner and engage in a thought-provoking and creative
process that inspires them to maximize their personal and
professional potential.
Through structured conversations the mentor should help
the mentee to become more aware of what they want and
why they want it, define some goals and action plans, and
then check progress along the way, while overcoming
obstacles as they arise.
The mentor may also provide some industry and/or role
related input along the way.
A Definition

 Make a realistic time commitment and method for
contact with the Mentee
 Encourage the Mentee to express and discuss their
ideas, concerns and understanding of the career
choices facing them.
 Share with them appropriate insight and guidance.
 Refer Mentees to other sources of information or
further support.
 Help Mentees to set realistic and practical goals
and plans for how to achieve those goals. Review
their progress during subsequent calls or
meetings.
 Encourage Mentees to take responsibility for their
own decisions, plans and actions.
 Provide encouragement and support
mentor entail?

Walking the line
Bringing the key skills together of
Rapport…Listening…Questioning
SYMPATHY
• Attached
• Absorbed
• Shared journey
• Immersed in shared problem
• Can’t feed back - “I don’t
want to upset them”
• Carry the Mentee
• No plan for future
• Coach and client both stuck
OBJECTIVITY
• Detached
• Outsider
• Separate journey
• Not “my” problem
• Harsh feed back – “I told
him what his problem is”
• “Here’s my advice”
• Drive the Mentee
• Client feels stuck, coach
feels “so what?”
This is the domain
of LDS Mentors.
This is where we
can add value.
This is where
CHOICE exists.
This where the Spirit
resides & gives
guidance
A connection continuum.

 Careers
• What is it like to work in this industry?
• What education do I need?
• How much will I earn?
• What will is take to be a success?
 Presentation skills
• Personal presentation
• Project my best self
 Building personal strengths
 Confidence
 Leadership behaviours
 Working relationships/networks
 Work life balance
 Stress management
What are appropriate subjects
for mentoring conversations?

 Hope
 Fortitude
 Creativity
 Direction
 Inspiration
 Grounding
 Confidence
 Perseverance
 Sight and commitment to the big picture
 A plan
Leading to…

TGROW: A framework for
mentoring
Topic Goal Reality Options
Way
forward
• Find an
area to
focus on.
• Define
exactly
WHAT they
want
• Explore
today’s
situation
and barriers
to progress
• Create
ideas of
what they
could do.
• Commit to
action.
• They define
what they
will do.
1 2 3 4 5
The flow is not always left to right.

TGROW: The Detail
- What would you like to talk about….?
- You mentioned on the phone…..
- Tell me about….
- Tell me about your idea
- How can I help?
- Talk to me about what you want from today
TOPIC questions

TGROW: The Detail
• SMART
• Positive and
present
• 100% wanted
• 100% owned
GOAL
attributes
- How much do you want this? (specific, not a comparison)
- How else could you embellish this? Give me more detail.
- How soon?
- What will it do for you?
- If you knew for certain that you would not fail, what
would you have?
- Ownership: Can you take complete control and
ownership? (listen for a negative response)
- Evidence: How will you know when you have it? (listen for
all of VAK)
- Ecology check: Is it really what you want? If you could,
would you have it tomorrow?
GOAL questions

TGROW: The Detail
REALITY
attributes REALITY questions
- What is happening now?
- What are your values and how are they not being met
right now?
- What do you believe about yourself?
- Whenever you do X, what happens next?
- What have you tried, where did you get to?
- What do you think I can do for you?
- How you spoken to anyone else about this?
- What would you gain/lose by doing/not doing X?
(note here 4 separate questions)
- What would create certainty of achieving your goal?
- How could you break the goal down into smaller ones?
• Status is
crystal clear.
• The GAP is
crystal clear.
• Cause and
effect are
known

TGROW: The Detail
REALITY
attributes
• How long have you been thinking about this?
• How often do you think about this?
• How do you feel when you think about this?
• In what circumstances do you find yourself thinking about
this?
• How important is this to you, for example, on a scale of 1
to 10?
• What resources do you have to think about this better?
REALITY thinking questions
• Status is
crystal clear.
• The GAP is
crystal clear.
• Cause and
effect are
known

• A big list of
ideas
• No constraints
• Awareness of
possibilities
• Awareness of
the gap
OPTIONS
attributes
- What could you do, if you knew you’d not fail?
- What could you do today, this week, this month?
- Can you give me 3 more ideas on what to do?
- If you were advising a friend, what would you tell him/her?
- What would (name a famous person) do?
- What would be the most bizarre thing you could do?
- What is the most counter-intuitive thing that you could do?
- How can you best use all the resources at your disposal (time,
money, tools etc?)
- What else could you do with my support or others support?
- Who else could support you, and with what?
- Who will give you the encouragement you need?
OPTIONS questions
TGROW: The Detail

TGROW: The Detail
• Action clarity
• Action
commitment
• Responsible
100%
WAY FWD
attributes
Of the options that you just came up with:
• What can you commit to doing .. Today, next week etc?
• How would that look, in the form of a plan?
• Who will you ask for help, and what do you need from
them?
• How will you record your commitment? write it down?
• Who will you tell? How will you report your progress?
• On a scale of 1-10, how committed are you? (need 8+)
• When shall we have our next meeting?
WAY FWD questions

Some questions that may help
you if you get stuck
Mentee goes on a long
ramble
“Ok, so could you give me that in a nutshell?”
“I don’t know” “What if you did know?”
Mentee goes on a
tangent
“I notice we’ve moved on to another topic. How
important is this in relation to our original topic?”
You don’t know what
to ask
Repeat their last statement followed by “and?”
Still stuck on what to
ask
“What haven’t I asked you that you expected me to?”
“And what else?”
And one more
“If there was one thing you could have done differently,
what would that be?”

Let’s have a go at conducting a
mentoring conversation

Let’s have a go at conducting a
mentoring conversation
Topic Goal Reality Options Way forward
• Find an
area to
focus on.
• Define
exactly
WHAT they
want
• Explore
today’s
situation
and barriers
to progress
• Create
ideas of
what they
could do.
• Commit to
action.
• They define
what they
will do.
1 2 3 4 5
The flow is not always left to right.

 One-off events to support:
• Youth
• Mother’s returning to work
• Other’s struggling in the work
community
Other opportunities

Question and Answer Session

 “Follow me” (Matthew 4:19).
 “Ye are my friends” (D&C 84:63
 “Greater love hath no man than
this, that a man lay down his life for
his friends” (John 15:13)
 “Come unto me” (Matthew 11:28)
 “Thy friends do stand by thee, and
they shall hail thee again with warm
hearts and friendly hands” (D&C
121:9)
Our Exemplar in mentoring

LDS Mentors Launch Event Training 27th June 2013

LDS Mentors Launch Event Training 27th June 2013

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LDS Mentors Launch Event Training 27th June 2013