1. Engaging Families & Children: Practical Tips
Training Dates: March 18 & April 1 2015
Presenter: Melissa Cole, MSW, LCSW-C

2. Why do we choose to do this work?
What makes this type of work important to us?
Personal Values
Personally Affected
Desire to Help Others
Need to Contribute to the Community
Spiritual Calling
Professional Career
Personal or Professional Development
Additional Income
Other……

3. Why do families choose to work with us?
The Working Relationship.
Regardless of:
How the families reach us
Their unique presenting problems
The length or type of services
The number of workers involved
The team members
 Other…..
It is ALL about:
How meaningful services are to the family
What the family gains from services
How ‘easy’ service participation is for the family
‘RELATIONSHIP’ consists of:
Commitment +
Relating +
Knowledge +
Skills…………+
= Engagement
Engagement leads to positive outcomes!

4. What Brings BSF Staff & Families Together?
Core Principles of
BSF Programs
Establishing Trust
Active listening
Assessing
Communicating
Assisting / Mentoring
Crisis Intervention
Coaching / Modeling
Advocating
Educating
Maintaining Safety
Focusing on Strengths
Core Elements of Effective Helping Relationships
Availability
Knowledge
Flexibility
Communication
Time
Trust
Responsibilities
Positive attitude
Humor
Respect
Strengths
Hope
Forgiveness
Boundaries
Defined Roles
Reciprocity
Reliability
Honesty
Empathy
Consistency
Authenticity
Humility
Safety
Other…..

5. What Do We Often Take for Granted?
Some ‘common sense’ things we often overlook:
Remember: we are guests in their lives
their participation in services is a gift –not a
guarantee
Courtesy goes a long way:
confirm each appointment day/time; be flexible
Use preparatory empathy:
put ourselves in ‘their shoes’
Select our words carefully
interactions shape the relationship
Follow our purpose / we must stay on task
we are more than friendly visitors!
Do NOT make assumptions
we have the responsibility to seek clarification &
to set the tone for authentic interactions

6. More Items We Often Take For Granted….
 Maximize ‘teachable moments’ & apply them to the IRP
Using ‘here and now’ examples makes the treatment plan ‘real’
 Be open minded / look for creative solutions
Solution focused & strength based interventions
 Think like we are a member of a team…because we are!
Be mindful of other providers working with the family & make
sure we are collaborating
 Utilize anticipatory guidance / review next steps together
For example: changes in service delivery or plans for discharge
 Alert the supervisor to ANY safety concerns
Be familiar with agency protocols regarding safety issues
Discuss observations, disclosures, questions we have on this topic
 Normalize ‘taboo topics’
We have a responsibility to help families talk about tough topics
in constructive and productive ways (ie: sex, disabilities, violence,
discipline, etc…)

7. How Do We Make the Most of Our Interactions?
 What we say
• We must be purposeful in our
communication
 How we say it
• Verbal
• Non-verbal
 Active Listening:
• Words
• Behaviors
• Feelings
 Role Modeling / Action
• Take time to teach
• Celebrate accomplishments
• Lead by example

8. What is Active Listening?
Relating
Attitude
Do thoughts & behaviors match?
Type of communicator
Investment in services
Planning & Reflecting
Personal & Family Values
Self Image
Self-Esteem
Doing
Treatment Planning
Process of Change
Current Problems & Obstacles
Reacting / “Fight or Flight”
Identifying, Owning & Managing Feelings
Triggers for Feeling States
.
EMPATHY: identification with and understanding of another’s situation, feelings and motives.

9. Perspective and Engagement
Perspective = Connection
Once connected, rapport begins
Rapport provides opportunities for
effective communication
Once communicating, engagement is
built through the development of
trust, respect & reliability
We must recognize differences &
while also finding common
ground

10. How Can We Use Our Perspective?
Key questions to consider as we build & maintain relationships:
 What is the purpose of my contact?
 Have I communicated my purpose clearly?
 Do we share the same agenda?
 Do we have the same priorities?
 Do we share the same definitions for common concepts, words & goals?
 Are our roles well defined?
 Am I demonstrating my role, my purpose & my professional boundaries
through my words and actions?
 Is the treatment plan on target or in need of adjustment?
 How well does the family understand, apply & ‘buy in to’ the treatment plan?
 What’s working/successful in the working relationship? Has the success been
discussed/acknowledged? Have mistakes been addressed?
 What obstacles are blocking progress in the working relationship?
 What new information has come to my attention that needs to be addressed?
 What risk factors/safety concerns do I need to consider for each relationship?

11. What Differentiates Us?
 Cultural/Racial/Ethnic Identity
 Tribal Affinity
 Nationality
 Acculturation/Assimilation
 Socioeconomic Status / Class
 Language
 Education
 Literacy
 Family constellation
 Social history
 Perception of Time
 Health Beliefs
• Health / Mental Health
• Beliefs about Health/Mental Health
• Values
• Age Cycles
• Life Cycles
• Gender & Gender Identity
• Sexual Orientation / Identity
• Religion & Spiritual Views
• Spatial & Regional Patterns
• Political Orientation &Affiliation

12. Engagement and Boundaries
Why are boundaries so important?
They set the framework for us to talk about:
Our roles & responsibilities
The services being delivered
Our expectations for the working relationship
Limits of confidentiality , privacy & safety issues
They help us focus on our responsibilities to the client
The treatment plan is central to all communications
They reduce ‘compassion fatigue’
We don’t get overwhelmed as easily when we’re attentive to our limits
They establish parameters for legal & ethical behavior
When in question, consult the regulations / agency protocol / supervisor
They support regulatory & reporting requirements
Our timelines for home visits, reports & other services

13. Key Components of Boundaries
 What we say
 How we say it
 The meaning behind our communications
 Limits of Confidentiality
 Privacy
 Informed Consent
 Client’s right to self-determination
 Competence (including cultural competence)
 Conflicts of interest
 Dual relationships
 Record keeping & treatment planning
 Personal values
 Desire to ‘rescue’ to ‘be friends’ or to ‘be liked’ by the family

14. Roadblocks to Successful Engagement
 Making assumptions
 Giving advice
 Judging
 Making the work about us
 Placing blame
 Picking favorites
 Doing favors
 Breaking confidentiality
 Arguing
 Saying: ‘I told you so’
 Avoiding tough topics
 Lack of preparation
 Becoming friends
 Blurring boundaries
 Pride
 Embarrassment
 Stress
 One sided thinking
 Frustration / Impatience
 Ignoring ‘taboo’ topics
Active Characteristics Passive Characteristics

15. Unique Factors Influencing Engagement
 Involvement of Multiple Systems
• Medical / Health
• Academic / Vocational
• Mental Health / Psychiatric
 Cultural Differences
• Unique relationships with families
 Parental Functioning
• History or current stressors from:
 Substances
 Victimization / Perpetration
 Mental Illness

16. How do the Unique Factors Play a Role?
 Families are often in crisis
 Previous coping skills are not effective
 Sense of urgency to resolve problems
 Confusion / fear / intense emotions
 Sometimes socially isolated & vulnerable
 Psychiatric conditions are impactful
 Untreated conditions complicate engagement
 Treated conditions require special consideration
 Workers may represent unresolved issues
 We are symbols of prior working relationships
 Life is dynamic
 Engagement, assessment, intervention & outcomes
are processes

17. Parent/Guardian Functioning Up Close
 Substances
 Victimization /
perpetration / trauma
 Mental illness
 Involvement of other
services
 Other…
 Stress management
 Can be easily overwhelmed
 Judgment
 Often impaired or limited due to stress
 Frustration tolerance
 Many times low tolerance for stress
 Empathy
 Often self-absorbed due to unmet needs
 Personal boundaries
 Concept of privacy or intimacy is often blurred
 Rational thinking
 Emotional flooding or cognitive distortions
 Social stability
 Multiple relocations, losses & abrupt transitions
 Intimate relationships
 Anxiety often drives behavior
Impact Issues =
effects on coping

18. What Issues Require Immediate Attention?
Important Topics:
 Limits of Confidentiality
 Privacy
 Personal Safety
 Public Safety
 Boundaries
 Dual Relationships
 Misinformation
 Misunderstandings
 Different Expectations
Things to Consider/Steps to Take:
 Gather Information
 Document what is seen
 Contact the Supervisor
 Follow State Regulations
 Follow Agency Protocol
 Problem Solve the Situation
 Implement Crisis Intervention
 Take care of self

19. Some Engagement & Boundary Questions to Consider
 When I’m asking questions about the family’s life & routines, how do I remain respectful of
the family’s right to privacy & determination about what information to share? What
information do I have the right to know?
 When is it OK for me to disclose something personal with the family?
 What if the family invites me to dinner or to a family event? Is it ever OK to support a family
by forming a friendship with them?
 What if I don’t feel comfortable with something the family is doing in their home. Should I
say something? How would I bring it up politely/respectfully?
 When is it OK to give a hug or to put my arm around a client?
 What if I suspect child maltreatment or a safety concern in the home? How do I bring up
the limits of confidentiality in a way that supports the family and follows the law?
 What if I feel like a co-worker is crossing a boundary?
 When is it OK for me to give advice to a family?
 Is it ever OK to give a family money or personal gifts?

24. Helpful Websites
National Association of Social Workers
http://www.socialworkers.org/pubs/code/code.asp
National Association for the Education of Young Children
http://www.naeyc.org/about/mission.asp
National Early Childhood Technical Assistance Center
http://www.nectac.org/~pdfs/pubs/assuring.pdf
Division for Early Childhood Code of Ethics
http://www.campbellsville.edu/Websites/cu/Images/Academics/Education/Docum
ents/ECE/Cod e%20of%20Ethics_updated_Aug2009.pdf
American Counseling Association
http://www.counseling.org/resources/aca-code-of-ethics.pdf
ASHA Code of Ethics
http://www.asha.org/docs/html/ET2010-00309.html

25. Select References
 Allen S.F., Tracy E.M. (2008). Developing Student Knowledge and Skills for Home-Based Social Work Practice.
Journal of Social Work Education, Vol. 44 No. 1 p. 125-143.
 Boland-Prom K., Anderson S.C. (2005). Teaching Ethical Decision Making Using Dual Relationship Principles as a
Case Example. Journal of Social Work Education, Vol. 41 No. 3 p.495-510.
 Jacobson, G.A. (2002). Maintaining Professional Boundaries: Preparing Nursing Students for the Challenge.
Journal of Nursing Education, Vol. 41, No. 6 p. 279-281.
 Joanne Bardnt- ACSW LCSW (2008). Clinical Associate Professor Emerita Social Work Field Program, University
of Wisconsin- Milwaukee.
 Gray, M. Gibbons, J. (2007). There are no Answers, Only Choices: Teaching Ethical Decision Making in Social
Work. Australian Social Work, Vol. 60,. No.2 p. 222-238.
 Kagle, J.D., Giebelhausen, P.N. (1994). Dual Relationships and Professional Boundaries. Social Work, Vol. 39 No. 2
p. 213-220
 Lea, D. (2006). “You Don’t Know Me Like That”: Patterns of Disconnect Between Adolescent Mothers of Children
with Disabilities and Their Early Interventionists. Journal of Early Childhood, Vol. 28 No. 4 p.264-282.
 Reamer, F.G. (2003). Boundary Issues In Social Work: Managing Dual Relationships. Social Work, Vol. 48, No. 1 p.
121-133.
 Rosin, P., Whitehead, A., Tuchman, L., Jesien, G., Begun, A. (1993). Strategies for Dealing with Unexpected
Immediate Needs or Crisis. Partnerships in Early Intervention: A Training Guide of Family-Centered Care, Team
Building, and Service Coordination.