A mesothelioma diagnosis often requires us to shift roles in order to cope with this challenge. We adopt roles of "patient" or "caregiver," in addition to our existing roles such as parents, friends, employees and siblings. We will discuss ways to successfully cope with these changes in our November meeting. For more information visit us at www.asbestos.com.

1. Mesothelioma Changes
Relationships and Roles
By Dana Nolan
Licensed Mental Health Counselor

2. Relationships/Roles
The many “hats” we wear in life:
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Student
Spouse/partner
Child
Parent/grandparent
Friend
Boss/Employee
Niece/nephew
Aunt/uncle
Volunteer
Neighbor

3. Transitions and Changes in Roles
Every day we are many things to different people:
Mother, boss, wife, friend, sister, etc.
With practice, we transition through these
different parts with little effort or awareness that
we are switching roles.
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4. A Mesothelioma Diagnosis
Creates New Roles
You and your loved ones adjust to being Patient &
Caregiver.
Expectations:
Yours, Your loved ones’ and Society’s
How are these
expectations formed?
How exactly should a mesothelioma patient feel and behave?
Strong and confident? | Scared and withdrawn? | Be a warrior?
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5. Adjusting to a New Role
 Different phases of life usually lead to
shedding old roles and adapting to new ones.
 Think back to when you had to transition into
a new role? Becoming a parent for the first
time, getting your first job after school or
retiring.
 How do we do this? Who defines our roles
and the way we should behave and feel in this
role?
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6. The Patient Role
Effects of mesothelioma or its treatment may mean
patients may have to let go or cut back on some
responsibilities related to their roles.
Examples:
A patient may have to limit or quit working to release themselves of the
employee role.
A patient may not have the energy to babysit their young grandchildren
anymore, which can lead to the patient feeling unable to fulfill their role as
a grandparent.
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7. The Patient Role (cont.)
Is there a right way to be a mesothelioma patient?
What are the challenges of adapting to a
more dependent role?
Common Roles:
Fighter | Business-as-usual | Realist | Quiet One
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8. Caregiver Role
When caring for a loved one, adjusting to the role of
caregiver can feel overwhelming for many reasons.
Feeling responsible for household
duties the patient can’t complete.
Keeping track of medications,
appointments and treatment plans.
Conduit of information between
patient, their friends and family.
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9. Potential Struggles of Adjusting to Roles
Patient and caregiver must clarify
their needs and abilities.
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The patient must determine
what kind and how much
support - practical and
emotional - they want and
ask for it.
The caregiver needs to
determine type and
amount of support they
can give and communicate
that to the patient.
Conflict arises between patients and caregivers when there
are assumptions about someone’s needs, duties and
feelings.

10. Suggestions
Everyone adjusts to the role of caregiver and patient
differently. There is no “right way” to be a patient or a
caregiver… just YOUR way.
Don’t be pressured to be the kind of patient or caregiver who
someone expects or says you should be.
Focus on your needs, communicate them and ask for help
when you feel overwhelmed.
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11. Conclusions
Many patients and caregivers need some time
to adjust to their new roles when coping with a
diagnosis of mesothelioma.
Clarifying our own needs and what we can
or can’t do as patients and caregivers
opens the opportunity to discuss how to
adjust to these changing roles.
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12. Contact Information
1-800-615-2270
(800) 615-2270