1. 30 VIVA MAGAZINE • JANUARY, 2016
Make Over Your Life
2016It’s that time of year to get planning about how you want
your future to look. VIVA gives you a checklist...
ime to get real about
New Year’s resolutions.
Every year you decide
to lose that festive
weight, learn a language,
commit to Pilates, call
that long-lost friend,
pay off your debts… But
come February you’ve fallen into the same old
routine, and who could blame you, life takes
over, right?
“People tend to think about the things they
don’t want when they prepare their New Year
resolutions,” says Ipek Yum of Robert Simic
Coaching Institute suggesting that’s often
because we’re running away from something.
“The desired end result might be a good one,
but there is a certain level of doubt as they
get intimidated. Consequently these negative
emotions of fear of failure, of going back to the
unwanted situation, trigger the “self-sabotage
system” which causes people to find any excuse
to return to old habits.”
Ipek says it almost becomes like a
vicious cycle starting every year, then losing
momentum within a couple of months even
though your targets were supposed to make life
better, easier, healthier…
To break that cycle, there are smaller goals
you can implement to put you in the right
mindset to achieve all that you want to. By
tapping into your mind through meditation,
relaxation and kind communication, you’ll
master the art of positive thinking and before
you know it, that brand new you you’ve been
trying to achieve New Year in and out, will be
revealed.
Here’s how to set resolutions that will not
only make over your life in 2016 but have a
positive effect on someone else’s too.
COMMIT TO KIND COMMUNICATION –
WITH YOURSELF:
When we get upset about the way we’re spoken
to by people close to us, or even complete
T
strangers, our offence seems justified. Yet, we
rarely take a moment to think about how we
speak to ourselves. When we take a wrong
turn or don’t meet a deadline we might
mutter, ‘You idiot!’ or ‘I’m so stupid.’ Time to
leave that negative name calling and blaming
behind and start speaking to yourself in a more
compassionate manner.
“Some people have a subconscious belief
that the only way they can effectively motivate
themselves is by being self-critical. But this is
damaging to self-esteem,” says Zeta Yarwood,
career and life coach at www.zetayarwood.
com. “The key is to always be loving, kind and
compassionate to ourselves – if we slip up that’s
okay. It doesn’t make us bad or worthless, it
makes us human. Recognise what caused the
slip, make peace with it, and move on with that
knowledge.”
When you stop punishing yourself you’ll
find you are also less likely to punish others or
indeed subconsciously invite others to punish
you with the same tone.
PRACTICE MINDFULNESS AND
MEDIATE:
It’s been scientifically proven that meditation
has an almost immediate effect on stress. By
balancing the central nervous system and
hormones, stress is relieved, as is anxiety over
what the year ahead holds and any addictive
behaviour you want to leave behind. You’ll also
tap into creativity and there are even said to be
anti-aging benefits.
‘Ninety percent of people come to me
because they are stressed and anxious,’
confirms meditation instructor Carolyne
Gowen of Still Your Mind (www.stillyourmind.
com.au). ‘I tell them they’re going to have
better relationships, be more successful,
creative, productive, manage their emotions,
enjoy better concentration and achieve clarity
in life.’
One of the first things you’ll notice after
implementing a meditation routine is that
you’ll sleep better and be less reactive to
frustrating situations. Once you master
the art of observing a situation rather than
immediately reacting to it you’re practicing
mindfulness. Mindfulness is a state of being
present and observing your thoughts and
feelings from a distance without judgment.
This attention allows you to find clarity in your
decision making and become less distracted
when it comes to meeting your New Year goals
because you are actually living in the moment.
SLEEP:
If you’re waking up and reaching for the touché
éclat to cover those dark circles and rushing to
get that before-work caffeine hit you’re one of
a growing number of women suffering from
sleep deprivation.
Experts advise seven to eight hours per
night but the reality is we’re getting six to
seven, if we’re lucky, and our lives are suffering,
not just our concealer budget and our
resolutions!
The most sleep-pressured group is women
of working age, females with too many balls
in the air. Why? Because pillow time is often
squeezed out in favour of other pressures
related to work, family and social life.
We’ve all been there; you start your day
feeding the cat or racing to day-care, try
to fit in a morning jog, meet demanding
work deadlines, squeeze in drinks with the
girls and update your Instagram before you
snooze. Sound familiar? Well, it’s time to
stop. By catching the right amount of Zzzs
you’ll increase your attention span, alertness,
concentration and problem solving skills.
With all this put into play, resolutions whether
they be January 1st goals, or small goals set
on a monthly basis, have in increased rate of
achievability. Its important to plot in advance
a time when you will cut off from TV, social
media and get a good night’s rest in favour of
staying up late.
S O C I E T Y
FEATURE:BYKELLIARMSTRONG.PHOTGRAPHY:SHUTTERSTOCK.
31VIVA MAGAZINE • JANUARY, 2016
BREAKOUTS
Try swapping out the below resolutions for our suggestions
“Set a short term “achievable” and “realistic” goal and
when you achieve them, set new ones,” advises Ipek,
describing the process as a much more positive,
motivating, and efficient way of goal setting.
Resolution: I’ll spend more time with my friends
Try this instead: Make an errand date
If you find yourself constantly cancelling a night out with
the girls, try booking in a ‘doing’ date like walking your
dogs in the park or selling your wares at the market.
You’ll not only get face-to-face time with your bestie,
you’ll cross something off your to-do list while you’re at it.
Resolution: I’ll get up for boot camp five mornings a week.
Instead: I’ll become more active during the day.
Making a big commitment to hit the gym, bootcamp or
a running club five days a week often backfires when
other every day commitments, including sleep, get in
the way. Instead, get up from your desk at least once an
hour to visit colleagues in place of emailing them. Skip at
pace to the car in the morning and dance around the
kitchen while you’re waiting for the pot to boil. Moving,
no matter when, counts as exercise and if you can do
three 10 – 15 minute bouts per day, you’re winning on
all levels.
Resolution: I’ll practice being more patient
Instead: Declare moan-free days and implement a fine
system if you catch yourself nagging.
Honking your horn at bewildered drivers, sighing in the
grocery line and pestering your hubby day in and day
out is, well, damn right draining. No one’s a winner when
there are constant complaints. Take a few breaths and
thinking of calmer, more collective ways to
communicate your frustrations.
Resolution: I’ll be debt free in six months
Instead: I’ll put 10 percent of my weekly pay towards a
bill kitty.
Putting away cash into a kitty, where you can see it
grow, will enable you to actually view the benefit of
saving and then repaying. Another idea is to empty your
purse every Thursday and head straight to the bank
with it to make a credit card payment.
Resolution: I’m going to learn a language
Instead: Study online
Learning online gives you the ultimate flexibility.
Download a foreign language app like MindSnacks and
practice your French in the car, on the treadmill or when
you’re waiting (patiently!) in line at the bank.
Resolution: This year I’ll commit to volunteering
Instead: Jump online and micro-volunteer from home
We don’t all have time to do good despite our good
intentions. If you haven’t quite committed to travelling
abroad to give your time to a non-profit, don’t feel guilty.
Instead join a micro-volunteering website like www.
helpfromhome.org
From the comfort of your couch you can contribute to
the environment, children in need and health research.