2. Act I: The Triangle
SCENE 1: ONE, TWO, THREE, CLANDESTINELY.
Morning. 8 am. Split scene: A white bedroom, a
red bedroom, and a small clinic exam room.
Lights up on white bedroom.
An unmade bed. White Sheets. There is a
complete stillness about the room, the birds
and breeze fighting to break the silence. At
the edge of the bed sits our couple, Malcolm
and Andrea.
They sit opposite each other at either end of
the bed. It’s awkward. They aren’t speaking.
The state of the room is dull; dust particles
are more interesting than these two. Finally,
after a long silence Malcolm slowly turns to
face Andrea. He speaks nervously, the weight
of the world crackling his voice.
MALCOLM
I...I’m sorry. You don’t have to say anything, I’ll go, I’ll just go.
If you want...Andrea, I can’t marry you...I’m gay.
Shocking! The dust particles are just as
stunned as Andrea is. Her eyes open wide, her
mouth hangs half open. She begins to gesture
with her mouth as if to say something in
return. The words won’t come out. Is she going
to scream? Start crying? She finally bursts
out-
ANDREA
OH THANK GOD, SO AM I!
They stare at each other, appalled. Bach’s
“Suite for Solo Cello No. 1 in G Major” begins
to play.
Blackout.
Lights up on red bedroom.
An occupied bed. Red sheets. As Bach’s cello
continues to serenade us, the music is muddled
by the sounds of a couple making love in the
bed. James and Emily are having morning sex.
The birds and the bees are closing in on
orgasm.
3. 2.
The blankets tussle against the moaning bodies
beneath them. Through heavy breathing we can
hear the couple speaking.
JAMES EMILY
Do that, that, OH Mmm. Oh yeah. Oh God
YEAH! Oh, FUCK, come don’t stop, don’t
on baby, yeah. C’mon, stop, don’t! I’m
do that thing, baby, getting close! Oh God
say it, say, I’m don’t stop, don’t,
gonna, YEAH- please don’t, OH GOD
MALCOLM!-
A brief uncomfortable beat. His name isn’t
Malcolm. James sits up and slowly stares at
Emily. She lays, oblivious of what happened.
JAMES
What?
EMILY
(Sits up.) What?
JAMES
You just said Malcolm.
EMILY
What are you talking about?
JAMES
Emily you just said fucking oh God Malcolm!
EMILY
(Beat.) I’m sorry, I must’ve been...(Grabs James.) C’mon I’m so close,
don’t stop now-
JAMES
(Pulls away.) To be justifiably mistaken for my best friend? Are you
kidding me!?
EMILY JAMES (CONT’D)
James! I’m sorry! People actually do
Don’t, hey, please this? Somebody else’s
don’t get soft. name?-
JAMES (CONT’D)
Look, hey enough with this orgasm bullshit. You just said Malcolm’s
name. My wife said Malcolm, (Gestures to his penis.) okay, he may never
be the same again.
Emily sighs heavily and lays back on her
pillow. James stares at her a moment, then
lays back.
4. 3.
JAMES (CONT’D)
Why did you say that? Do you have feelings for him?
She sits up and stares at James. After a beat,
guilt floods her face.
EMILY
...Yes.
James sits up. They stare at each other,
appalled.
Blackout.
Lights up on small clinic room.
Exam room. Dim. Two uncomfortable chairs. It’s
a small clinic. The Bach piece is almost over.
Wes sits cross-legged and texts furiously on
his cell phone. He laughs occasionally at the
responses.
A petite girl walks into the room. Liz, the
resident doctor. She wears a physician’s
uniform and holds a folder. Liz sits in front
of Wes, her demeanor solemn.
WES
I feel close to recovery. Did you lock the door?
LIZ
Listen, Wes-
WES
Nurse! Doctor will see you now.
He approaches her; begins to unbutton her
physician’s robe. He kisses her neck.
LIZ
Hold on, please sit down.
WES
No time nurse, we gotta christen this room before breakfast.
LIZ
I’m a doctor.
WES
(Grabs her breasts.) You are physical fuckin’ therapy.
She’s had enough. She pushes him off.
5. 4.
LIZ
Wes! (Beat.) You have to go now. Sorry. I can’t see you anymore.
WES
(Disappointed) You’re breaking up with me? Why?
LIZ
(Holds up the folder.)...Because you’re HIV positive.
Wes freezes, appalled. Bach’s “Suite for Solo
Cello No. 1 in G Major” concludes. The air
goes stale.
Blackout.
SCENE 2: THE INGLORIOUS DISCIPLES OF BASKET-BALLS
Same morning. Breakfast. 10 am. Malcolm and
Andrea’s kitchen. The space is pristinely
maintained much like the bedroom; the
unwavering neat-freak characteristics of
Malcolm. He dirties the space temporarily,
cooking egg whites and turkey sausage. Andrea
sits sloughed on the countertop next to him; a
lonely coffee mug sits with her. She pours it
full of chianti and sips away.
MALCOLM
Ninety-two?
ANDREA
Good morning for a good year.
MALCOLM
I was saving that.
ANDREA
For tonight?
MALCOLM
Well...
ANDREA
Did you cheat on me?
MALCOLM
No. Did you?
ANDREA
No.
MALCOLM
Do you want a sausage?
6. 5.
She stares at him. He hands her a plate of
food. She eats the eggs slowly, with her
fingers. He mostly plays with his food.
MALCOLM (CONT’D)
I’m a lark. It’s all so terribly Victor, Victoria.
ANDREA
Your a west side homo, it’s not any sort of a prank.
MALCOLM
You lied to me.
ANDREA
(Pensive) I strap on a dick, you strap on a bra. You lied to me too.
MALCOLM
Why did we do this?
ANDREA
Republicans.
MALCOLM
That’s hardly fair.
ANDREA
It’s true.
MALCOLM
You want some white wine?
ANDREA
(Not listening.) White Christian elephant men.
MALCOLM
I think we have a riesling in the fridge.
ANDREA
How did you fuck me?
No response. Malcolm pours himself a glass of
riesling. He sits next to Andrea. They stare
at the floor.
MALCOLM
...I loved you. You’re my best friend.
They stare at each other for a beat. There’s a
brash knock at their door. Andrea’s face
drops. She swoops off of the counter.
ANDREA
I’m a cannibal. I’m going back to fucking bed.
7. 6.
She exits. Another knock. Malcolm answers it.
Wes strides inside holding a ninety-cent cup
of coffee and a bagel with cream cheese. His
tie is crooked.
WES
Hey black man.
MALCOLM
...Hey Wes.
WES
I spotted a revelation as I was walking here.
MALCOLM
Hang on-
WES MALCOLM
No listen this is (To the
serious genius- bedroom.)
Andy, do you still
want your eggs?
No response. The walls crack. Wes is confused.
WES
She okay?
MALCOLM
She’s re-birthing.
WES
You guys went out last night?
MALCOLM
Yes. All sorts of out.
WES
Thanks for inviting me. (To Andrea) Hey Winehouse, get up! I got you a
present!
MALCOLM
She’s not. It’s useless.
WES
Huh. Anyway listen, so this guy is selling hot dogs on Hudson, right,
and he has one of those umbrella stands.
As he expounds he messes his mouth with the
overstuffed bagel, speaking through bites.
WES (CONT’D)
This guy looks terrifying like, I dunno, some sort of Arabic Son of
Sam. He’s scary, right? But people are flocking to this guy.
8. 7.
Flocking a line wrapped around a Starbucks. A STARBUCKS! At ten in the
morning! So I think what’s the catch here? What is so appealing about
terrorist hot dog man?
MALCOLM
(Confused)...People like them. They’re convenient.
WES
No it’s even better than that. This guy, unlike the rest, had the
hungry colors.
Malcolm is completely lost. He shakes his
head. A door closes from within the bedroom.
Malcolm reacts, wanting to join Andrea and
wallow in their relationship-ending secrets.
MALCOLM
(Distracted) What?
WES
Hungry colors. Discovery Channel and what-not. Three colors when used
together can make people hungry. Red, yellow, and green. So dude
decorated his umbrella and put green and red tape all over the yellow.
Entrepreneurial frankfurter manifesto!
MALCOLM
I don’t get your, um...do you want Andy’s eggs?
WES
Malcolm, step out of her vagina for two seconds and listen to me. It’s
the color scheme for the restaurant. We use yellow, green and red, a
win-win!
MALCOLM
...okay.
WES
(Impatient) Nevermind. What’s the matter?
MALCOLM
What?
WES
You’re dismantled. What’s wrong, did you fight?
MALCOLM
Nothing.
Andy comes out from hiding. She goes to grab
the bottle of Chianti. Breakfast.
WES
(To Andrea) Ah, sunshine, wilkommen!
9. 8.
ANDREA
Your tie is crooked.
WES
What?
ANDREA
Your tie is never crooked. Never. Something’s wrong, what is it?
WES
Nothing.
ANDREA
(Swigs the wine.) Liar. Your tie is crooked.
MALCOLM
Andrea?
They stand in uncomfortable silence. What to
say?
WES
...I bought you a gift.
ANDREA
(Uninterested) Leave it in the mailbox, mack. See you tonight.
She exits with the wine bottle.
WES
(To Malcolm) Your fiance reminds me of a Shih Tzu.
MALCOLM
You’re okay then?
WES
I’m a locomotive. Tunneling. Hurdling. I don’t know, maybe I’m tired of
being the sleep-around kid.
MALCOLM
You’re kidding.
WES
I like the new chick to wake up to every morning thing, but then its
the same ending routine every night. Get to go home to my borough box
and Charlie Gibson is the only one hoping I’ve had a good day.
MALCOLM
This isn’t you talking.
WES
It is. It’s going too fast.
10. 9.
MALCOLM
What about that doctor? Weren’t you getting serious?
WES
She dumped me.
MALCOLM
Get the fuck out.
WES
Yes.
MALCOLM
Why?
WES
(Apprehensive)...I was overqualified.
MALCOLM
Huh?
WES
Nothing...Listen what about you?
MALCOLM
No we’re okay...You’ll be there tonight?
WES
I’m going to the restaurant for a while. I’ll be there later. Oh here,
here’s Andrea’s gift. Housewarming.
Wes pulls out a crucifix. He gives it to
Malcolm.
WES (CONT’D)
Sorry didn’t wrap it.
MALCOLM
Um...Andy’s Jewish.
WES
(Points to the crucifix.) So was that guy. Gotta go. Red, yellow and
green. Peace black man.
Wes exits. Malcolm stands alone and slowly
walks to a chair. He sits and buries his head
in hands. He begins to cry.
Andrea re-enters the room, holding her
stomach.
ANDREA
I’m sick.
11. 10.
MALCOLM
I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.
ANDREA
Are you crying?
MALCOLM
Wallowing. Dying. Aren’t you?
ANDREA
No, I’m sick.
MALCOLM
It’s okay to be upset about this Andy. You can let go.
ANDREA
I’m relieved. Aren’t you relieved?
MALCOLM
What?
ANDREA
We can be us now. Finally. Did you tell him?
MALCOLM
There is no more us! We had five years together! It’s gone!
ANDREA
Malcolm, you were never in love with me. Never. Jesus Christ you were
gonna marry me!
MALCOLM
You were gonna marry me!
ANDREA
You proposed!
MALCOLM
You fucking said YES!
A beat. They hold on each other in their rage.
ANDREA
...Did you tell him?
MALCOLM
No.
ANDREA
Why?
MALCOLM
I’m not ready.
12. 11.
A beat. Andrea sits.
ANDREA
(Calmer) I’m not either. I was relieved that you told me first. It’s
been like this...impending death sentence. A lie so heavy you just
decide to make it fit any way it can, inside of you, until you tell
yourself that it’s part of you, the lie is part of you. And you are
heavier. And you weigh everything down, everything you touch, its like
you are breaking everything and everyone you come in contact with. But
I was willing to live with that lie for the rest of my life because I
couldn’t bring myself to be honest...with you. With them...Shit,
Malcolm, they’re throwing a god-dam engagement party in our honor
tonight and it’s all for nothing! Who does this? What the fuck are we?
MALCOLM
Taboo. We’re weightless. It’s the world that’s heavy, not you. Not us.
ANDREA
Remember Alan Giraldo?
MALCOLM
(amused)
Basket-balls?
They laugh.
ANDREA
The kid with the boom-box. Fucking Kanye blasting and the Strawberry
Shortcake stickers...
MALCOLM
What did he used to play at the blacktop?
ANDREA
Oh my God, yeah, it was some...testosterone charged acoustic version of
Dancing Queen.
They are in hysterics.
MALCOLM
And then...and then he started wearing his jeans low. Gangster. He
stood there trying to impress Emily, he was trying to impress Emily,
you know, I don’t know why (Laughing hard.)...and they fell down...his
underwear...hey Alan...
MALCOLM (CONT’D) ANDREA
...nice basket-balls! Nice basket-balls!
Fall down ROFL laughter. Malcolm imitates as
if to have two baskets hanging from his
testicles.
MALCOLM (CONT’D)
(Laughing) They were like...like this...
13. 12.
ANDREA
That rocked so fucking hard.
MALCOLM
Did he ever some out?
ANDREA
I heard it was drenched in cliche. He finally wore a turtleneck and
skinny-jeans to Thanksgiving one year and declared himself a Nancy.
MALCOLM
That kid was so obvious though. (Beat.) You want a tea-bag, basket-
balls?
They burst into laughter again. After a moment
of smiles+, they are silent, and stare at the
floor. Then-
MALCOLM
...I forgive you.
ANDREA
(Emotional)...I forgive you too.(Beat) Do we call off the party?
MALCOLM
...No. No we have to do it. We have to stick by it.
ANDREA
The lie?
MALCOLM
Stick by each other. I don’t think we can do this on our own. We need
us. We can come out together.
ANDREA
Huh. What a fucking parade this is.
MALCOLM
It’s better this way.
ANDREA
(Somewhat amused) You wearing skinny jeans tonight?
MALCOLM
You wearing a turtleneck?
Andrea rises, still holding her stomach.
ANDREA (CONT’D)
Any other dirty little secrets? Are you in love with someone?
A beat. This time its Malcolm who sits down.
14. 13.
MALCOLM
...Why, are you?
ANDREA
No.
MALCOLM
(Hesitantly)...James. I’m in love with James.
Andrea steps back, shocked. She holds her
mouth.
ANDREA
Oh God, I’m gonna throw up again.
She rushes out of the room. Malcolm begins to
cry again.
Blackout.
SCENE 3: A PREORDAINED RENDEZVOUS (BARBETTA DAYS)
TriBeCa. James and Emily’s loft. James is
sitting on his couch. He types at his laptop
sitting on his coffee table. Emily is pacing
behind him, fidgeting, pretending to do
something other than ignore the elephant in
the room.
EMILY
...James.
He types; ignores her.
EMILY (CONT’D)
James!
JAMES
Okay listen...(Reads from computer.) It’s not often that a restaurant
offers the perfect blend of an inviting environment, an innovative
menu, and a broad spectrum of culture in one space. But such is the
ambitious pursuit of five New York entrepreneurs who believe the great
city deserves a great new buzz-worthy space where regulars can escape
and unwind. In April of this year, they will be opening ‘blank’,(To
Emily.) that’s where we’ll put the name, (Reads.) on the corner of
Franklin and Hudson Streets in Manhattan’s TriBeCa. (To Emily.) What do
you think so far?
EMILY
...Can we talk about this?
JAMES
(Types again, feverishly.) See what I’m doing, Em, is simple. I’m
focusing. I’m working on this, this which is what we love.
15. 14.
This restaurant as a collective idea of something that we are doing
together with a clear goal in mind. And in doing so, I’m being open-
minded. I’m opening my mind to this entire thing. Big gaping, BLEEDING
mind, trying to stay unhinged and not scream at the walls. Because I
want to try and make myself know that you’re a human, and therefore
imperfect, which means it is okay for you to have feelings - strong
sexual say my name, say his name FEELINGS for another man even though
we’re married. Just sitting, working, saying that its okay to my brain
and that eventually it will make some sort of sense. So, since that
what’s I’m doing, and since I need to do it to hold my own composure
right now, I’ll ask you again; what the FUCK do you think so far?
EMILY
(Beat.)...I don’t know about “broad spectrum of culture”.
James slams his notebook shut. He rises to
face Emily.
JAMES
Did you fuck him?
EMILY
No!
JAMES
But you love him.
EMILY
I don’t...love him.
JAMES
Okay fine you like him. More than me.
EMILY
You’re my husband!
JAMES
Doesn’t mean you have to like me.
EMILY
I love you!
JAMES
Oh thank God! You love me enough to wear a ring on your finger, but you
like him enough to scream his name during INTERCOURSE!
EMILY
You get so confrontational when you’re mad!
JAMES
Sorry, perhaps instead I’ll go sit in the corner and stick my finger up
my ass!
16. 15.
EMILY
James, listen to me...don’t look at me like that!-
EMILY (CONT’D) JAMES
You are looking at me Well what do you
like I cheated...I expect, Em...You may
don’t...I can’t as well have
handle when you look cheated...I don’t
at me with that know what to think
look...I HAVE NEVER about this...
CHEATED ON YOU!
EMILY (CONT’D)
(Beat.)...I have never cheated on you with anyone. Ever.
JAMES
...You don’t like me.
EMILY
We’re not really fighting right now.
JAMES
Doctor Phil and I disagree.
EMILY
You’re not angry. You want absolution.
JAMES
For what?
EMILY
Emasculation.
JAMES
Oh please. Testicular prowess is not the problem.
EMILY
You’re afraid you can’t satisfy me like you used to.
JAMES
If that were the problem you wouldn’t have been COMING when you were
screaming Malcolm’s name!
EMILY
I wasn’t...
Beat. Emily has no more excuses. She walks to
the couch and sits. She stares at the floor.
EMILY (CONT’D)
Malcolm took me on a date before you did. One date. He never told you
about it. He was worried about what you would think. I guess I was too.
17. 16.
JAMES
(Beat.) Yeah.
EMILY
He took me to Barbetta. This was what, six years ago? Jesus...He was
really sweet. Real nervous. But there was something about him that
tugged at the heartstrings. There was something raw and harboring about
Malcolm, I don’t know what it was, just depth that I found myself lost
in and...I was just really attracted to him.
JAMES
So you spent the night together?
EMILY
No. We went to see a one-man show in the Village. It was terrible. But
it was terribly romantic. I don’t know, I just...I felt like I fell in
love with him. In one night.
JAMES
Then why did you marry me?
EMILY
James, I love you. I didn’t really love him, it was a girlish
infatuation. It was a crush. Besides, he didn’t want to date anymore
after that night. He said it wasn’t me, he was scared of hurting you.
He knew you wanted me too, and he didn’t want to stand in the way of
your happiness. So you asked me out, and Malcolm and I have remained
friends.
JAMES
...Really? Malcolm?
EMILY
Yeah.
JAMES
You never slept with him?
EMILY
No.
JAMES
But you did love him?
EMILY
I thought I did.
JAMES
Not good enough Em. That won’t work for me.
EMILY
What?
18. 17.
JAMES
It’s an inkling that sits in the back of your mind and rots. We’re
bound for life, but how do I know you’re not always wondering if he is
the one that got away?
EMILY
That’s ridiculous.
JAMES
People don’t fall out of love. People endure it. You’ll wear it like a
badge. You may love me, but you will always still have loved him.
EMILY
I’m happy where I am. I’m not wearing any badges.
JAMES
Denial.
EMILY
You’re wrong about that one.
JAMES
No I’m not.
EMILY
Then how many badges are you wearing?
JAMES
(Beat.) One.
EMILY
Excuse me?
JAMES
It was a high school romance. That doesn’t matter here.
EMILY
How doesn’t it?
JAMES
She wasn’t one of your best friends.
EMILY
But you’re wearing her. You’re still wearing her all over you even now.
JAMES
Don’t start making this about me!
EMILY
I’M NOT PERFECT!
JAMES
You are like so intense right now, I feel like I need to film this.
19. 18.
EMILY
So help me James if you pull out your camera right now I will YouTube
you so fast.
A beat. A staring contest. James very slowly
moves to his bag on the couch. He reaches in,
at slow-motion pace, and pulls out a video-
camera.
EMILY
Shove it up your ass.
JAMES
(Filming.) Close up, and...oh yeah, the vein on your forehead gets me
hard.
EMILY
(amused)
Fucking Kubrick wannabe.
JAMES
This is my wife who successfully cheated on me before we ever met.
A beat. Emily is silent and trapped within her
own thoughts. James stops filming her.
JAMES (CONT’D)
...You hurt me.
EMILY
...I know.
JAMES
(Beat.) I need a drink.
EMILY
It’s eleven-thirty.
JAMES
Bloody-Mary.
EMILY
Don’t do this, please. Don’t go to that place. You disappear when you
drink.
JAMES
You want one?
EMILY
(Beat.) Yes.
James pours two drinks while Emily sits. He
joins her at the couch and sits with her.
20. 19.
They drink for a moment, James’ mind obviously
racing. Finally he gives a glimpse of
conclusion.
JAMES
Okay here’s what this is. It’s a stain. Its a mole on this canvas. And
we have to remove it.
EMILY
What?
JAMES
A bump. You loved Malcolm. You married me. You remembered that you
loved Malcolm. You screwed my brains out with his face painted on.
She turns away, guilt-stricken.
JAMES (CONT’D)
So, it’s simple. Malcolm is unfinished business. And he’s our friend.
He’s getting married in a week and he has no idea how you once felt
about him. That’s not fair.
EMILY
Fair to him or me?
JAMES
Fair to me...So you’ll tell him. Tonight.
EMILY
You’re kidding.
JAMES
Yeah you’re right, I’m kidding. I want a divorce.
An uncomfortable beat.
JAMES (CONT’D)
...Now I’m kidding. Kidding there.
EMILY
(Stands.) I can’t tell him James. Not now, the man’s about to get
married.
JAMES
Right, which is why. What a revelation.
EMILY
It’s not right.
JAMES
Why?
21. 20.
EMILY
We’re celebrating him here tonight. We’re not barreling confessions at
him. What will Andrea think?
JAMES
Andrea is a big girl. I think she can handle it.
EMILY
I’ll tell him. After the wedding. Not tonight.
JAMES
Tonight. It’s perfect.
EMILY
No!
JAMES
...You have to. Because I want you to. And you owe me, darling. Big.
EMILY
(Beat.) You’re such a sadist!
She exits to another room.
JAMES
I’m a masochist, sweetheart. Somehow you think this is fun for me!
James sits alone for a beat. He rises and
picks up the telephone, dialing a number. They
answer.
JAMES (CONT’D)
...Hi, can I order some flowers to be delivered tonight?...How late do
you deliver?...Um, okay, yeah that’s fine...Yeah, in fact the later the
better, could you deliver at eight?...Tonight...Right...Um, you have a
nice bouquet of roses?...Yeah that’s fine...Yes please...Say, um...say
“To my wife. I’m sorry. This will bring us closer. I love you.”...Can
you, can you read that back?...No, closer. C-L-O-S-E-R...Yes...No, no
name, she’ll know it’s me...Can your delivery boy leave them at the
doorstep?...The doorstep...Well, if I pay with my credit card right
now, can I leave his tip right now?...Is that okay?...Great...Okay
great, hold on...(Looks for his wallet.) Oh shit, my wallet’s in my
car, can I call you back, I’m sorry...Yeah, my name’s James, if you can
make the order, I’ll call you right back...yeah that’s me, is this
Crystal?...Yeah, how are you, I didn’t even recognize you...Yeah I
still have your number memorized, need flowers again...Cause I’m a fuck-
up, ya know? I’m a newlywed...Okay I’ll call you right back...Bye.
He hangs up. He exits the room. A beat. Emily
enters. She looks for James, and then picks up
the phone, dialing a number. They answer.
22. 21.
EMILY
...Hi, is Doctor McCallum in?...Emily...Yeah, thanks...(Beat. She
paces, nervously.) Liz? Hey, it’s Em...Um, I think I need to make an
appointment...No, I missed my period...Yes...Okay thanks...Yeah that’s
fine...Two o’clock?...Okay...I should?...Well which one is a good
one?...First response?...I pee on it and I’ll know...okay...(Hears
James coming.) Okay, I gotta go, thanks Liz, bye.
She hangs up. James enters. They stare at each
other. Beat.
JAMES
Well?
EMILY
...I’m going to the bistro, you need anything?
JAMES
...Don’t run away.
EMILY
I’m coming back.
JAMES
You look really pretty.
EMILY
I look pretty guilty.
JAMES
You’re glowing.
EMILY
(Apprehensive) You still want me to tell him?
JAMES
Yes.
EMILY
(Beat.) I’ll be back.
She exits. James grabs the phone and begins to
dial.
Blackout.
SCENE 4: IMMUNODEFISHES
Small clinic Exam room. Elevenish. Doctor Liz
McCallum is sitting quietly reviewing some
papers.
Wes barges into the room. He is anxious,
sweating, panting.
23. 22.
WES
I don’t believe you.
LIZ
What is this?
WES
I am not viral.
LIZ
This isn’t healthy.
WES
There are a million reasons why I shouldn’t be this guy. I’m not the
one who gets sick.
LIZ
And who is?
WES
I am not a brand of plague. I’m on the good side. I’m wool-coat, suit
and tie, four-dollar coffee America, Liz. I’m part of the engine, not
the affliction!
LIZ
Sit down Wes.
WES
I don’t believe you!
LIZ
(Quietly Stern) Sit...the fuck...down.
He sits. A beat.
WES
You’re going to talk about the stages now. I know it. The shock, the
denial, the depression, the fear...
LIZ
I just want you calm.
WES
The night-sweats, the vomiting, the lesions, the fever-
Liz slaps Wes across the face.
WES
(Beat.) Um, thank you?
LIZ
I’m really optimistic that you’re here because you’re freaking out and
not because you want sympathetic get-back-together sex.
24. 23.
WES
I’m not opting for the latter, but the latter sounds therapeutic.
LIZ
You’re not gonna die, Wes. You’re too pretentious.
WES
Not fair. My modesty is my pride and joy.
LIZ
Oh please, you’d fuck a cow if it flirted with you.
WES
I did flirt with a cow once...wait, you mean a real cow?
LIZ
Why are you here?
WES
Sympathetic get-back-together sex.
LIZ
Get lost. I have patients to see.
WES
(Sternly) I’m a patient!
A beat. Liz can see now that Wes is there for
support.
WES
See me. I need a little...patience.
LIZ
I need you to try and understand that this disease is far easier to
maintain than it used to be.
WES
I don’t maintain. I get and I release; indulge and then vamoose.
LIZ
(Sarcastic) Trust me I know.
WES
This is forever. Without choice. I don’t like that.
LIZ
Nothing is without choice. How many girls have you been with?
WES
One hundred and twenty-seven. And possibly one guy. And one cow.
25. 24.
LIZ
I can’t date you anymore, like I said. And it’s not because of your
disease. I’m not that shallow. I just don’t like the idea of being
committed when number one hundred twenty-eight comes along.
WES
(Nodding.) You think I got issues?
LIZ
I think you’ve got a virus that’s trying to own you. And you’re gonna
have to make some changes if you want to own it instead.
WES
This is like therapy at this point isn’t it? My fingernails are
outrageous mongrels that want to dig across a chalkboard and make you
hear the screeching I can’t stop hearing...
LIZ
You need time.
WES
I need sex.
LIZ
Stop joking.
WES
Who’s joking?
LIZ
You are the most vicious kind of vicious circle anyone has ever spun,
you know that?
WES
You’re the only one who can make me feel better right now.
LIZ
Then get serious.
WES
Mongrels, Lizzy! Mongrels - MONGRELS!
LIZ
Fine! You want it? HIV, Human Immunodeficiency Virus, a lentivirus that
within the course of breakdown of its host leads to Acquired
Immunodeficiency Syndrome, or AIDS. The immune system begins to
deteriorate which opens the floodgates to a spectrum of deadly
infectious diseases. The immune system becomes essentially obsolete for
the individual and opportunistic infections or malignancies easily lead
to death. HIV is spread by transmission by way of blood, semen,
needles, breast milk and transmission from a mother to her newborn
baby. The host often develops flu-like symptoms two to four weeks after
transmission during the acute HIV infection.
26. 25.
The virus then enters the clinical latency stage lasting anywhere from
two weeks to twenty years where it is highly active within the lymphoid
organs - thymus, spleen, lymph nodes, and becomes concentrated within
the follicular dendritic cells. The virus roams freely as well as
within the body’s T-helper cells. How are ya feeling?
Beat. Wes is frozen in silence.
LIZ (CONT’D)
The disease originated in primates and was transferred to humans
sometime during the early twentieth century. It was declared an
epidemic on June fifth, nineteen eighty-one. It was officially named
HIV in nineteen eighty-six by the International Committee on Taxonomy
of Viruses. The virus is terminal and has been deemed one of the most
significant pandemics in our lifetime. The progression of untreated HIV
to full-blown AIDS is on average nine to ten years and after infection
of the latter the patient usually expires after only nine months...
LIZ (CONT’D) WES
However...However, in Oh this is fucking
nineteen ninety-six great Liz! I’m gonna
combinations of go take a nap now,
highly active I’m so fucking
retroviral therapies relaxed...How am I
were introduced and supposed to take this
administered to and...and walk away
patients, greatly from here living with
improving the life- it? You’re giving me
expectancies of HIV science and numbers
patients. Further and immunodefishes
studies are also and what-not...Oh my
being developed to God, oh God...Holy
find a indisputable shit you cock-sucking
cure for the disease God!...
altogether. Wes? WES!
A beat.
WES
...How long? Today?
LIZ
Thirty-two plus.
WES
What?
LIZ
Thirty-two plus years. With treatment starting now.
A sullen moment for James. He lets the number
set in.
27. 26.
JAMES
I wanted to be a perverted old grandpa.
LIZ
Wes, I-
JAMES
What about you? Jesus, you were the last-
LIZ
I’m negative. I tested right away. There’s no solid way of playing
detective with the origin of this thing.
JAMES
So what’s next?
LIZ
Cocktails.
JAMES
My place?
LIZ
Drug cocktails.
WES
...Your place then?
LIZ
I’m gonna get you started on drugs right away...And I’m gonna see you
through this.
WES
Thanks.
Beat. Liz writes on a clipboard. Wes stares at
her.
WES (CONT’D)
You wanna get lunch?
LIZ
No.
WES
You wanna get married?
LIZ
You know what a memory T-cell is, Wes?
WES
Is that a maybe?
28. 27.
LIZ
It’s my favorite part of the human body. The single-nucleonic decision
maker. See, the memory T-cell is the one that recognizes antigens that
have previously infected you. You get infected by something that you
recover from, and your body will remember it. These cells particularly
will remember it. If the sickness returns, see, the T-cells will create
an army of defense even before it has a chance to start its demise...So
while the other cells in the body will roam around aimlessly and
constantly careening into the same old dangerous, damaging life-forms,
these cells make a judgement call. They remember. They remember that
the last time they ran into a pathogen like this one, it was only there
to use them and cause damage and pain. They remember that the last time
they saw a pathogen like this one it tried to use them for its own
survival, but in doing so it left a big gaping hole. They
remember...which ones are good...and which ones unfortunately are
not...No, Wes. I’ll keep you alive, but I most certainly will not marry
you.
A beat. Wes has no response. Finally-
LIZ (CONT’D)
I have patients...
She holds out an envelope for Wes to take. He
hesitantly takes it, then exits.
Liz stands alone and stares at the floor.
Blackout.
29. 28.
Act II: Below
SCENE 1: “”
The restaurant. A large barren space. Two
small tables. Three chairs. Noon.
Malcolm is pacing back and forth. He holds a
tape recorder in his hand. After moments of
deep thought, he turns the recorder on and
places it on a table. He speaks.
MALCOLM
A philanthropic endeavor. Bending will. Men seeking men...
A beat. Malcolm thinks.
MALCOLM
Easy street...I’m like the last carpenter bee standing in the hive. The
hive is giving me hives. We all know what it’s like to be so itchy all
of the time with a scab-laden rash of secrets here, secrets there...I
pull the skin up above my eyelids and leave a piece...peace...pieces of
it I think I thought you saw under my fingernail, when I pointed you
out among the other ruby encrusted my-little-fucking-ponies. Don’t make
it out to be some earth shattering surprise. I’ve got a stomachache,
and its your fault. You told me not to be the pot calling the kettle un-
American, smoking and smoldering at the right hand of the...prism.
Until, of course, in these events of unbridled happenstance, Jack the
Ripper dressed as an androgenous lady liberty tells you your rainbow is
too fucking bright and has been keeping him up at night. Close the
shutters then, dude, pull the wool over your wolf eyes. I’m not
poisoning the God part of your brain here. That’s been your job. This
is no philanthropic endeavor on my part, it’s candy for the vegetable-
gorged child. It’s induction. We can’t all be one to taper off the
piece of our finger that turned green. There was gold there once. Fake,
camouflaging gold, but gold with good intentions. Don’t step on each
other’s toes unless you are ready to stop running. Don’t fake the
orgasm unless you are ready to stop coming...I don’t pretend not to be
a conformist. Please sit properly in the assigned seat and order will
find you a place in the sea of worry-free mediocrity. It never gets any
more interesting, but at least it never gets any harder. Just do as you
are told. Everything in it’s right place. Bending will. The grand old
party. Monuments of industrialists, entrepreneurs and
disestablishmentarians. Monuments of marble slab and leather pants.
Sticky pieces, dried and crusted in their belly buttons, so nobody can
see. I’m like the ratio of the geographic united states that
illuminates its major pieces; I’m a statistic. I’m a number in a
number; one through fifty inside one through three-hundred million. One
doesn’t matter. Shouldn’t one fucking matter? It only takes a single
parasite to sink the big blue whale. Pay attention, okay, it’s in our
best interest. We are matched against paper walls of one another as
more than just cock, ass, twat and jugs. It’s deeper and more profound
than simply men seeking women seeking women seeking men seeking men.
30. 29.
I guess its still too early to tell which chromosomes are nothing but
big giant mistakes. A fumbling of question marks...We can’t see
anymore. No one has a clue anymore.
The front door opens: it’s Andrea. They stare
at each other.
MALCOLM
That’s all.
ANDREA
Brainstorming?
MALCOLM
I wanna get one in today.
ANDREA
You’re the only person I know who brainstorms for a Blog.
---SCRIPT IN PRODUCTION--
