9. Conditional Love
• Self-differentiation:
- an ability to see yourself as separate from those people or groups of
people in your life who love you conditionally, which means that they
don’t just love you for who you are (warts and all), but love you only if
you act or behave in a certain way.
11. Conditional Love
• We all come from and belong to different
“systems”.
12. Conditional Love
• We all come from and belong to different
“systems”.
- Whatever the role we grew up playing, we are expected to continue
playing that role by the rest of the members of the family because their
roles depend on us remaining in the role they expect us to play.
14. Reinventing Our Lives
• We feel drawn toward acting out sexually
when the world around us makes us feel as if it
is not OK to be whom we are and that in order
to receive love we need to be someone whom
we aren’t.
15. Reinventing Our Lives
• We feel drawn toward acting out sexually
when the world around us makes us feel as if it
is not OK to be whom we are and that in order
to receive love we need to be someone whom
we aren’t.
• If conditional love is the cause for our acting
out sexually, then the solution to our unwanted
sexual behavior is the conversion, or change,
of conditional love into unconditional love.
17. Four Target Points
Recovery Target #1: Psychological Examination of Feelings.
18. Four Target Points
Recovery Target #1: Psychological Examination of Feelings.
Recovery Target #2: Seeking, Establishing and Engaging in
Community.
19. Four Target Points
Recovery Target #1: Psychological Examination of Feelings.
Recovery Target #2: Seeking, Establishing and Engaging in
Community.
Recovery Target #3: Truth, Trust and Territory.
20. Four Target Points
Recovery Target #1: Psychological Examination of Feelings.
Recovery Target #2: Seeking, Establishing and Engaging in
Community.
Recovery Target #3: Truth, Trust and Territory.
Recovery Target #4: Development and Exploration of Genuine
Faith.