Class Developed for Military Couples Prior to Deployment

1. Pre-Deployment Marriage Seminar CH(CPT) Keith J. Andrews TF-Ram Chaplain 29 NOV 07

2. Pre-Deployment Marriage Seminar CH(CPT) Keith J. Andrews TF-Ram Chaplain 29 NOV 07

6. Seven Stages of Marriage Based on the book:The 7 Stages of Marriage Laughter, Intimacy and Passion: Today, Tomorrow, Forever. By Sarí Harrar and Rita DeMaria, Ph.D. Reader’s Digest. 2007. and http://www.rd.com/channel/7-stages-of-marriage

7. STAGE 1: PASSION “ Romance and Falling in Love”*

8. STAGE 2: REALIZATION “ Facing Everyday Reality of What it Means to be Living Together”*

9. STAGE 3: REBELLION “ The Couple Begins to Ask Themselves; How much conflict are we having? How is the conflict resolving? Is my general mood toward my partner one of feeling good or one of frustration?”*

10. STAGE 4: COOPERATION “ Understanding that Marriage is a team effort”

11. STAGE 5: REUNION “ Focus returns back to the marriage.”*

12. STAGE 6: EXPLOSION “ Something Big is Happening”*

13. STAGE 7: COMPLETION Trust, Fun, Passion, Blessing, Meaning, and Purpose into your Marriage.

17. Deployment

18. The Emotional Cycle of Deployment: A Military Family Perspective Adapted from Article Published in the Apr-Jun 2001 edition of U.S. Army Medical Department Journal. Time Adjusted from Six Month Model to 15 Month Model

24. Deployment Deployment Pre-deployment 11 Soldier Spouse/Family Sustainment Redeployment Post-Deployment

25. Communication

26. Authentic Communication from Preparing for Marriage. P140 Authentic Communication is much more than just talking.

28. Time Out

29. Not a good time... We can bring up issues at any time, but the “listener” can say “this is not a good time.” If the listener does not want to talk at that time, he or she takes responsibility for setting up a time to talk in the near future.

31. Creating Intimacy

32. Speaking the Same Language excerpts from The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

37. If your spouse’s love language is Words of Affirmation: 1. Remind yourself with 3x5 card by phone or computer that says “Words are Important! Words are Important! Words are Important!” 2. Set a goal to give your spouse a different compliment each day for a month. 3. Write a love letter, a love paragraph, or a love sentence to your spouse. 4. Look for your spouse’s strengths and tell her how much you appreciate those strengths.

45. What do I need to Hear in Iraq or at Home?

46. Recommended Resources

49. Parents Helping Children Cope With Deployment Online Resource with Parent/Child Video Parents Video http://www.sesameworkshop.org/tlc/

50. Pre-Deployment Marriage Seminar CH(CPT) Keith J. Andrews TF-Ram Chaplain www.chaplainandrews.com