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How to Win Him Back by Focusing on Your Happiness
1. Part 3- How to win him back by being
happy
If your ex has just broken up with you, and if you want him back, you need to have a no
contact period with him. In this no contact period, you need to make some positive
changes about your life if you want him back. You will find it hard, but it can only be
rewarding!
Positive physical change
Start by with positive changes that will make you feel good. The best place to start is by
improving your looks and taking care of your body:
● Get a haircut. Coco Chanel used to say: "A women who cuts her hair is about to
change her life".
● Go shopping. You'll feel better if you find new dresses to shape up the new you.
● Do some exercise. Sports are great to keep your mind busy and relaxed. It also
makes you look and feel more sexy!
● Go for a manicure or a massage. it is always pleasing to feel that someone is
taking care of us.
Positive physiological change
It seems very simple, but it's important that you decide to stop with what makes you
unhappy and start doing more of what makes you happy!
2. 1.take your time: You need perspective. Do what you feel like as long as you devote
some time on things that will have a positive impact on your life. If you feel like
watching stupid movies or series, than do it...
2. Write. Writing down your feelings in a personal journal or a blog is a proven
therapeutic method. Blogging can be nice to realize that you're not alone in this
situation. If you blog, do it anonymously in case you regret later...
3. Go out. Get into the habit of saying YES to whatever activity your friends propose. If
it's just going out for a walk, say yes. If it's going out to a bar, say yes. You'll end up
doing things you'd never expect. And it will also allow you to meet new people.
4. Try Yoga and/or Meditation. Yoga and meditation creates a connection to your
mind and body. Yoga and meditation will help you relax and get perspective on life.
You'll also be better at prioritizing your days so that you can feel better about yourself.
Analyse the situation
Once you have a little bit of perspective, you need to step back and carefully consider
You also need to step back and decide the pro's and con's of getting back with your ex.
● Why did I like him in the first place?
● Why did our relationship end? Can it change?
● Is he really the person I want to be with?
● Etc..
Once you carefully assessed your relation, decide what you want! If you have decided
that you are 100% certain he is the one, it's time to get in touch with him again.
Re-introduce yourself to him
1) Before
Before you get in contact with him, it's crucial that you have made the changes you
want in your life. The plan relies on that you have made the changes in your life that
made him leave you in the first place.
2) Write him
3. They are a few ways you can re-introduce yourself to him. Be creative. It is a bit like
when you were interested in him in the very beginning. You want to get to know him
without telling him that you want to get romantic.
● Send him a hand-written letter.
It's always a great way to receive a message. He will feel nervous when he reads it, and
he will have the time to read the letter over and think how he should get back to you. In
the letter, tell him that you needed time to get over the breakup as it came as a big shock
at the time. Tell him that you are ready to connect and talk because you previously cared
about each other. Also tell him what you did (the things that made you happy). But don't
be too specific so that he will want to know more.
● Write him an SMS/ Whatsapp/ FB message. The medium that you are the most
confortable with
Keep it short and tell him that something reminded you of him. Tell him that you want
to have a talk over a drink or coffee so that you can reconnect with him.
Remember, at this point, you want to avoid talking about your relationship. Tell him
that you are ready to meet him again as friends.
3) Meet him
You want to look pretty, but don't overdo it. He knows you very well, so you need to look
as natural as possible. But you want to communicate happiness. Don't say that
everything is great as he will look through you. But tell him that you have started to do
different stuff that you really like. Tell him that you feel happy. You want to show him
you are now independent and you want to radiate positive energy. But do not lie, he
knows you better than most people do!
Don't talk about the negative things that happened in your past relationship. You want
to communicate that you are over it by bringing up good memories. It shows that you
don't feel contempt. What you want to do is to start a new life, so it's different to have a
good start.
Ideally, he will now start thinking about you and ask himself why he broke up with you.
If he at some point tries to kiss you or get romantic in any way, tell him it's not a good
idea. Tell him that you still have feelings for him and that it is not a good idea to ignite
them again. You are looking for a new life now..
4. If he still hasn't realized you've changed and that you are the right person for him, then
just continue being yourself (intelligent, independent, awesome and happy). He should
realize it at some point. This is the point where old passion ignites again!
Have a relationship discussion
When you progressively see each other more, make sure that you start having an open
relationship discussion. You don't want to go through what the same mistakes again.
And you don't want to break up for the same reasons. Read more why couples fall in the
relationships traps.
1) Apologize. Ask him why he broke up. Tell him you didn't know he felt that way. Tell
him how you should have acted and tell him you very sorry.
2) Set up your new foundations. Discuss how you'll make things better in your new
relationship. Tell him how you have changed, and what you will change and tell him
what you'd like him to improve.
3) Don't go in the expectation loop. The expectation loop is hoping or depending on
something to be happy. It's having unreasonable high expectation where you shouldn't...
High expectations might create tension and make you less happy. If you remove
expectations completely, you'll notice that he'll genuinely surprise you every day.
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