Presented by Clinical Sexologist Dr. Martha Tara Lee of Eros Coaching as part of Certificate of Andrology by Society of Men's Health, Singapore at Amara Hotel on 9 April 2016. Dr Martha Tara Lee is Founder and Clinical Sexologist of Eros Coaching since 2009. She is a certified sexologist with ACS (American College of Sexologists), as well as a certified sexuality educator with AASECT (American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists). Martha holds a Doctorate in Human Sexuality as well as Certificates in Sex Therapy, Practical Counselling and Life Coaching. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women under 40′ by Her World Singapore in July 2010 and ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women by CozyCot Singapore in March 2011. Website: http://www.eroscoaching.com.

1. Female Sexual Dysfunction:
Couples Who Need a Helping
Hand
Certificate of Andrology
for Society of Men’s Health
9 April 2016

2. Dr. Martha Tara Lee
Clinical Sexologist
• Doctorate in Human Sexuality
• Masters in Public Policy and
Management
• Bachelor of Arts (Comm)
• Certificate in Sex Therapy
• Certitificate in Practical Counselling
• Cert in Life Coaching

3. Agenda
1. Sexology
2. Sexual Dysfunctions
3. Treatments
4. Let’s Talk about Sex
5. Quiz

4. What is Sexology?
Study of sexual interests, behavior, and function which combines:
Biology Physiology Medicine Psychology Statistics Epidemiology
Criminology Religion Philosophy Zoology Anthropology Sociology

5. Sexologists study:
Sexual
development
Sexual
orientation
Sexual
relationships
Sexual activity Sexualities
of special group

6. Common Sexological Issues
• Body image and sex-
negative conditioning
• Sexual desire
• Courtship concerns
• Obstacles to Intimacy
• Sexual development,
maturation and aging
• Sexual communication and
negotiation
• Medical considerations
affecting sexuality
• Atypical sexual behaviours
• Sexual trauma
• Gender identity
• Sexual orientation
• Sexual education for parents
• Women’s concerns
• Men’s concerns

7. • Hypoactive Sexual Desire
Disorder
• Sexual Arousal Disorder
• Sexual Aversion Disorder
• Female Orgasm Disorder
• Sexual Pain Disorder
Dyspareunia
Vaginismus
Female sexual
interest/ arousal
disorder
Genito-pelvic
pain/penetration
disorder
DSM-5 Female Sexual
Dysfunctions

8. Frigidity
Inhibited Sexual Desire
Disorder - DSM-3
Hypoactive sexual desire
disorder - DSM-3-R
Female sexual interest/
arousal disorder - DSM-5
A Name is Just a Name?

9. • Sexual dysfunctions (except substance-/medication-
induced sexual dysfunction) now
o Require a duration of approximately 6 months and
o More exact severity criteria
• Subtypes for all disorders include only
o “Lifelong vs. acquired" and
o “Generalized vs. situational”
• Two subtypes were deleted:
o “Sexual dysfunction due to a general medical
condition" and
o “Due to psychological versus combined
factors"
More on DSM-5

10. Sexual Response

11. Factors Influencing Sexual
Response
• Vascular (Blood Vessels)
• Neurological (Brain)
• Hormonal
• Psychological (Mental mind)
• Relational
• Psychosexual skills

12. Sexual Desire
• Begins in the brain.
• The experience of sexual
fantasies, thoughts, and
wanting to engage in or be
involved in sexual activity.
• Includes being responsive or
receptive to sexual advances
by a partner and of wanting
to continue the activity once
physical contact begins.

13. Responsive
Desire
Spontaneous
Desire

14. NightMorning

15. My Observations
1. Before Pregnancy
• Female: Fears/ anger/ dismissive
– just sperm
• Male: Sexual performance
anxiety
2. During Pregnancy
• Female: Mood swings
• Male: May not have any sex
3. After Baby
• Female: Tired
• Male: When are things going to
get better?

16. Madonna/ Whore Syndrome

17. 1. Guilt – much to be grateful for
2. Dismissed – I’d just go away/ withdraw
3. Rationalized - she’s a good person/ wife/
mother
4. Frustrated – why am I always last on the
list?
5. Anger – towards wife/ child
For Men - Persistent lack of sex

18. 6. Rejected – no longer a priority
7. Self-esteem - No longer attractive to their
partner – own self-perceived lack of
attractiveness
8. Used – to procreate only
9. Internalize things – must have done
something wrong
For Men - Persistent lack of sex

19. Psychosocial Issues
• Lifelong or acquired
• Symptom or situational
• Unresolved history of sexual abuse or trauma
• Body image/ Self-esteem issues
• Psychiatric history
• Stress, anxiety, sadness
• Relationship conflict
• Partner’s sexual dysfunction

20. Relationship Problems
• Anger
• Poor Communication
• Criticism
• Neurotic Interactions
• Incompatible Sexual
fantasies
• Alcoholism & Sexual Abuse
• Phobic Avoidance of Sexual
Intercourse
• Unconscious Conflict about
Sex, Commitment,
Pregnancy
• Sexual Abuse Issues

22. The Orgasmic Diet
1. Take supplements (especially fish oil); a multivitamin; calcium,
magnesium, and zinc; and extra iron and vitamin C.
2. Balance of 40 percent carbs, 30 percent protein, and 30 percent
fats at every meal.
• Avoid trans fats and polyunsaturated fats, including
vegetable oils such as corn oil, soybean oil, and safflower
oil, that counteract the benefits of the omega-3 fatty acids
• Eat monounsaturated fats like olive or canola oil or
moderate amounts
• Eat a half-ounce of quality dark chocolate every day.
3. Avoid things that interfere with sexual function, including
caffeine, cigarettes and other stimulants; hormonal birth control;
and drinking alcohol to excess.
4. Exercise the PC muscles
Lindberg, M (2008) The Orgasmic Diet: A Revolutionary Plan to Lift Your Libido and Bring You to Orgasm, Harmony

23. The Low Down on Low Libido
• Increase sea vegetables
• Increase beans
• Increase root vegetables
• Increase water
• Increase spicy foods
• Increase chocolate
• Reduce alcohol
Source: Vitti, A. (2013) Woman Code, HarperOne, p. 298

24. Lack of Sexual Drive
1.Communicate
2.Get Tested
3.Arms on Deck
4.Schedule Sex
5.Prepare for sex
6.Self care
a. Exercise
b. Quit smoking
c. Food

25. 7. Expand your ways of having sex
a. Masturbation witnessing
b. Mutual masturbation
c. One-way sex
d. Sex toys
8. Recruit a Taskforce
9. Give it some time
Lack of Sexual Drive

26. What is Vaginismus?
Involunatry
contraction of
vaginal muscles
making
penetrative sex
difficult or
impossible

27. Kegels

28. • 28 lessons + transcripts
• Affordable
• 24 x 7 Online Access
• Multiple access
• Personalised email
support
Online Program

29. Sensate Focus
• Week 1 & 2: Non-genital sensual touch
• Week 3 & 4: Genital tease
• Week 5 & 6: Genital stimulation
• Week 7 & 8: Vaginal containment
• Week 9 & 10: Vaginal containment with movement
(intercourse)

30. Dyspareunia
1. Where is the pain?
2. When did it start?
3. What was done?
4. What treatments has been attempted?
5. Is it hormonal?
6. Ask about arousal/ lubrication
7. Recommend lubricant
8. Suggest pelvic floor specialist
9. Begin with self-exploration
10. Keep pain journal
11. Explore doing genital massage

31. Lack of Sexuality Education

32. We Don’t Ask Because Of…
• Personal embarrassment
• Lack of knowledge re: clinical
relevance
• Ignorance re: who, when, how, or
what to ask
• Concern re: not knowing how to
answer questions
• Concern re: becoming
aroused/uncomfortable
• Concern re: appearing
seductive/intrusive
• Uncertainty about legal issues
• Time constraints

33. ISIS Model

34. 1. A couple comes in and cannot consummate
their marriage. A sexologist would…
a) Tell them to use lubricant and try harder
b) Clarify if they mean never had penetrative sex
c) Check for their reasons of why unable to have sex
d) Ask if they know what vaginismus is
e) All except a
What Would You Do? - Quiz

35. 2. A couple comes in and say the wife has low sex
drive. A sexologist would…
a) Find out what their definition of low sex drive is
b) Ask if they have gone for medical check ups
c) Check what they tried
d) Explore the sexual attitude of the woman
e) All of the above
What Would You Do? - Quiz

36. 3. A lady comes in and attribute her low sex drive to
being sexually violated when she was 5 - 15. A
sexologist would…
a) Encourage her to get over it – it’s all in her head
b) Insist she must tell her husband about it
c) Tell her to go to the police so justice is served
d) Teach her to do kegels
e) Explore what her goals are
What Would You Do? - Quiz

37. 4. A couple comes in and say the wife has low sex
drive. The lady is very negative about everything that is
discussed. She gets angry and defensive. A sexologist
would…
a) Ask if she has gone for a medical check up
b) Tell her she has an attitude problem
c) Sit back and let her talk – It’s her money
d) Admit she is beyond hope
e) Check if she has depression
What Would You Do? - Quiz

38. 5. Your patient starts crying in consultation. She admits
she is feeling depressed. Do you…
a) Pass her tissue, and tell her to stop crying
b) Just do your job and give her the drugs she came for
c) Refer her to staff nurse
d) Send her to a mental health professional
e) Ask if she has suicidal thoughts
What Would You Do? - Quiz

39. Odds and Ends
GROW Model
Permission to self – Pleasure; to
use vibrator, Ask for certain kinds of
touch, caress.
Limited Information – Changes in
sexual response with pregnancy,
menopause, aging. Impact of
medication(s) on sexual function.
Specific Suggestions – HRT
benefits and risks, use of lubricants;
Positions.
Intensive Therapy – Refer to
specialists for couple therapy,
resolution of long-standing
problems.
PLISSIT Model Counseling Skills

40. Don’t Ask
Don’t Care
What We
Want to Avoid…

41. What is Your Approach?
•Sex-positive
•Non-judgemental
•Educational
•Client-centered
•Do no harm

42. Dr. Martha Tara Lee
Clinical Sexologist
Eros Coaching Pte Ltd
Website: www.eroscoaching.com
Email: drmarthalee@eroscoaching.com