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1. Communicating Your Story: Ten
Tips For Writing Powerful
College Application Essays
Palisade Charter High School
Thursday, September 15
Rebecca Joseph
getmetocollege@gmail.com
@getmetocollege
@allcollegeessay
http://tinyurl.com/palis
ades0915

2. Overview of Shifting 2016 American
Admissions Landscape

3. How Important Are Personal Statements?
What do American colleges look for?
1. Grades
2. Rigor of Coursework, School
3. Test Scores
4. Essays/Personal Statements*
5. Recommendations-Teacher and/or Counselor
6. Activities-Consistency, development, leadership,
and initiative
7. Special skills, culture, connections, talents, and
passions

4. Essays Are One Piece of The Applicant’s
Quilt
Test
Scor
es
Grad
es
Rigor of
Coursew
ork
Activitie
s
Rec
Letters
Uniqu
e
passi
ons
and
potent
ial
Demonstra
ted
Interest

5. The Power and Danger of Essays
1. Give me two reasons why admissions officers value
college application essays.
2. Give me two reasons why they often dread reading
the majority of them.

7. Essays=Opportunity
Share
Reflect
Stand Out

8. So….Tip 1
Tip 1. College essays are fourth in importance
behind grades, test scores, and the rigor of
completed coursework in many admissions office
decisions. Don’t waste this powerful
opportunity to share your voice and express
what you really offer to a college campus.
Great life stories make you jump off the page and
into your match colleges.

9. A New Paradigm
Tip 2.
Develop an overall
strategic essay writing
plan.
College essays should
work together to
help you communicate
key qualities and
stories not available
anywhere else in
your application.

10. Ultimately…admissions officers want to
know your…
Impact Initiative

11. University of California
Fall 2017 application
opened yesterday.
Introduced new format
and prompts for both
freshman and transfer
essays
Applicants must write 4
short 350 word max
essays.
Freshman can choose
from 8 prompts.

12. UC Freshman Personal Insight Questions
 Freshman Personal Insight Prompts: Answer any 4 of the following 8 questions:
 What do you want UC to know about you? Here’s your chance to tell us in your own words.
 Which questions you choose to answer is entirely up to you: But you should select questions that
are most relevant to your experience and that best reflect your individual circumstances.
1. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others,
helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.
2. Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and
innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
3. What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that
talent over time?
4. Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to
overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
5. Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this
challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
6. Describe your favorite academic subject and explain how it has influenced you.
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
8. What is the one thing that you think sets you apart from other candidates applying to the University of
California?

13. UC Focus
Leadership
Changing communities
Creativity
Academic Passions and Achievements
Overcoming Challenges
Initiative
http://tinyurl.com/palisades0802

14. Great UC Guidance
Questions & guidance
Remember, the personal questions are just that — personal. Which means you should use our
guidance for each question just as a suggestion in case you need help. The important thing is
expressing who are you, what matters to you and what you want to share with UC.
1. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively
influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over
time.
Things to consider: A leadership role can mean more than just a title. It can mean being a mentor
to others, acting as the person in charge of a specific task, or a taking lead role in organizing an
event or project. Think about your accomplishments and what you learned from the experience.
What were your responsibilities?
Did you lead a team? How did your experience change your perspective on leading others? Did
you help to resolve an important dispute at your school, church in your community or an
organization? And your leadership role doesn’t necessarily have to be limited to school activities.
For example, do you help out or take care of your family?
Need more help?
Download the worksheet for freshman applicants [PDF]
See our writing tips & techniques

15. Great Strategy
Start with UC application.
Fill out the application including activity section
 5 Honors
 5 Non A-G Courses
 5 Work/Jobs
 5 Community Service
 5 Extracurricular
Then go to short insight questions. Really focus on
four pieces of additional evidence you want to share
with UCs about what you offer.
These are practical, literal short essays.

16. Current CA 2015-2017 Prompts
250-650 Words (2015-2016 percentages)
1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful
they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you,
then please share your story. (49%)
2. The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success. Recount an
incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it affect you, and what did you
learn from the experience? (17%)
3. Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted you to act?
Would you make the same decision again. (4%)
4. Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an
intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma-anything that is of
personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its significance to you and what
steps you took or could be taken to identify a solution. (10%)
5. Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked your
transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture, community, or family.
(22%)

17. Four Major Application Types:
2. The Common Application
 Many private and some public American use the centralized
Common Application with their own Writing supplements
 More than 700 colleges use it.
 www.commonapp.org
 Don’t start writing any essays until you see all the essays required
for your top schools. My app-All College Application Essays has the
requirements.

18. Common Application Writing Supplements
Some long– U Penn, U Chicago (300-650 words)
Some medium—Stanford
Some small— Columbia, Brown

19. Four Major Application Types:
3. Private college specific applications
Fewer and fewer major private universities are not on the
common application
But there are still holdouts.
Georgetown and MIT to name a view.
Make sure you don’t write unnecessary essays as
Georgetown essays are like The Common Application.

20. Four Major Application Types:
4. Other systems
Some large public systems have their own
applications which do not require long, if any essays.
Yet their applications for financial aid or academic
support programs add in those requirements.
Washington State, for example, several short essays
which they share with other state systems.
The Universal Application is another system. It has
fewer colleges on it than The Common Application.

21. Develop A Master Chart
Tip 3. Keep a chart of all essays required by each
college, including short responses and optional
essays. View each essay or short response as a chance
to tell a new story and to share your core qualities.
I recommend three sheets.
 1. Major deadlines and needs. Break it down by the four
application types
 2. Core essays-Color code all the similar or overlapping essays.
 3. Supplemental essays. Each college has extra requirements
on the common application. Again color code similar types:
Why are you a good match for us? How will you add to the
diversity of our campus?

22. Write the Fewest
Yet Most Effective Essays…
Tip 4.
Find patterns
between colleges
essay requirements.
Use essays more
than once.

23. Where to Begin: Brainstorm

24. Positive Personality Traits

25. 5. Other Brainstorming Tips
Help them brainstorm
1.Make a resume.
2.Start With UC Prompts
3.Reading model essays from actual college websites
4.Looking at other college’s essay prompts-U Chicago, Tufts
5.Creating a letter to future roommate or an amazing list of
what makes you you.
6.Looking at 5 top FB and Instagram Pictures
7.Reading models from other students
8.Do culture bags

26. Great Strategy
Start with UC application.
Fill out the application including activity section
 5 Honors
 5 Non A-G Courses
 5 Work/Jobs
 5 Community Service
 5 Extracurricular
Then go to short insight questions. Really focus on
four pieces of additional evidence you want to share
with UCs about what you offer.
These are practical, literal short essays.

27. Individual and Collaborative

28. What Did You Do Last Summer?

29. Into, Through, and Beyond Essay Approach
Tip 7. Follow Dr. Joseph’s Into, Through, and Beyond
approach.
It is not just the story that counts.
It’s the choice of qualities a student wants the college to
know about herself

30. Into,Through, and Beyond
Into
 It’s the way the reader can lead the reader into the piece—images, examples, context.
 Always uses active language: power verbs, crisp adjectives, specific nouns.
Through
 What happened…quickly…yet clearly with weaving of story and personal analysis
 Specific focus on the student
 Great summarizing, details, and images at same time
Beyond
 Ending that evokes key characteristics
 Conveys moral
 Answers ending prompts of two UC essays
 UC 1”and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.”
 UC 2 “What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it
relate to the person you are”

31. Goal of Into Through Beyond
Share positive messages and powerful
outcomes.
Focus on impact, leadership, and initiative.
If you want to include challenges, lead
quickly to who you are now.
Some states can use only socio-economic
status, but not race, in admissions, but in
your essays, your voice and background can
emerge.

32. Tip 8. Use active writing: avoid passive sentences and
incorporate power verbs. Show when possible; tell
when summarizing.
Tip 9. Have trusted inside and impartial outside
readers read your essays. Make sure you have no
spelling or grammatical errors.
Take the Time With These Essays

33. Final Thoughts
Tip 10. Most importantly, make yourself come alive
throughout this process. Write about yourself as
passionately and powerfully as possible. Be proud of your
life and accomplishments. Sell yourself!!!
Students often need weeks not days to write effective
essays. You need to push beyond stereotypes.
Admissions officers can smell “enhanced” essays.
You can find many great websites and examples but each
student is different.

34. Contact Dr. Joseph
Rebecca Joseph, PhD
 Professor, Cal State LA
 Founder, Get Me To College
and All College Application
Essays
 Current 2016 Unsung Hero,
LA County
http://tinyurl.com/palisades
0915
Contact
getmetocollege@gmail.com
@getmetocollege
@allcollegeessay