2. What are emotions? Emotional intelligence Ability to understand and manage one’s own emotions and to be sensitive to other’s feelings Physiological changes Nonverbal Reactions Cognitive Interpretations Activity
5. Personality Affects emotions Extroverted personalities Neurotic personalities Influences but doesn’t control communication Internet chat rooms, e-mail
6. Culture Experience of emotions Degree of displaying emotions Interpretation of others emotions Understand own cultural filters when judging others’ emotion-related behaviors
7. Gender Differences in expression of emotions Women more likely to verbally & nonverbally express feelings In general, men are less emotionally expressive
8. Social Conventions & Roles Unwritten rules of communication Emotions shared are usually positive Suppress unpleasant Limited by requirements of social roles
16. Express Your Feelings Sharing your feelings is healthier Mentally and Physically Sharing multiple feelings The worst is usually expressed Feeling vs. Acting It’s important to know the difference
17. Managing Difficult Emotions Facilitative Debilitative Thoughts cause feelings Interpretation of events drive emotions Self-talk The non-vocal, internal monologue that is our process of thinking
18. Debilitative Emotions Fallacy of Perfection People feel that they must be perfect communicators Fallacy of Approval Feeling that you must go out of your way to persuade people to like you Fallacy of Should Obsessing about how the world should be
19. Fallacy of Overgeneralization Focusing on a general shortcoming as if it is everything Fallacy of Causation A person must do things as to not inflict undesirable responses Fallacy of Helplessness Resigning to the fact that external forces determine happiness Fallacy of Catastrophic Expectations Always imagining the worst in situations
20. Minimizing Debilitative Emotions Monitor Emotional Reaction Physical: stomach butterflies, racing heart Reactions to others Note the Activating Event What sets you off? Record Your Self-talk Dispute Irrational Beliefs 3 steps Scenario : Boss and Employee
extroverted people (upbeat, optimistic, enjoy social contact) report more positive emotions in their everyday life neurotic personalities (tendency to worry, be anxious, feel apprehensive) report more negative emotions in their everyday life internet has proven to be an effective way to facilitate emotional communication provides a low-threat way to approach others
notion of eating snails might make people in France smile and think of a delicacythough it would cause many North Americans to grimace in disgust social scientists have found support that people from warmer climates are more emotionally expressive than those who live in cooler climates one study showed that ethnicity led to considerable differences in the way people gauged others’ emotional statesEthnicity also shaped ideas about appropriate rules for expressing one’s own emotionsEx: Study showed that Latinos are more willing to express emotions of love because it is more culturally accepted
biological sex is the best predictor of the ability to detect and interpret emotional expressions better than academic background, amt of foreign travel, cultural similarity, or ethnicity women are more likely to use their emotions to clarify their feelings, whereas men are more likely to use their emotions sarcastically in general, men tend to be less emotionally expressiveEspecially when it comes to revealing feelings of vulnerabilityIncluding fear, sadness, loneliness, and embarrassment less bashful about revealing their strengths and positive emotions
in mainstream U.S. society, unwritten rules of communication discourage direct expression of most emotions people are generally comfortable making statements of fact and often enjoy expressing their opinions, but rarely disclose how they feel Emotions people do share directly are usually positive. People are reluctant to send messages that embarrass or threaten the face of others When compared to past centuries, North Americans today strive to suppress this “unpleasant” emotion in almost every contextIncluding child rearing, the workplace, and personal relationships Expression of emotions are also limited by the requirements of many social roles salespeople are taught always to smile at customers, no matter how obnoxious firefighters are socialized to manage their emotions and how to display them
In a society that discourages the expression of feelings, emotional self-disclosure can seem risky.For a parent, boss, or teacher whose life has been built on the image of confidence and certainty, it might be frightening to say “I’m sorry. I was wrong” Main fear when expressing feelings is that emotional honesty might make others feel uncomfortable and thus change relationship with this person.
Along with cultural rules, social rules, and self-induced fears, our emotions are also affected by the feelings of those around us this is what is known as emotional contagion Emotions are “infectious” ex: being around a calm person leaves you feeling more at peace ex: or when you were in a good mood but came in contact with someone who was having a bad day/week
Affective Oriented people are much more aware of their own emotional states and use informational about their emotions when making important decisions.Awareness of emotions leads to a variety of positive traits and is important in our everyday communication with one another and long lasting relationships.In addition to being able to be aware of your feelings, is important to be able to identify your emotions. This can help manage emotions and is a key part of emotional intelligence.Many people know the difference between feeling angry and acting angry, but there are many people who do not. For some, being angry means being violent.
Most of the time, we are experiencing many different feelings. However, we cannot express all of these feelings all at once.Use the right vocabulary
3 steps: is belief rational? Explain why belief does or doesn’t make sense. If belief is irrational, write down an alternative way of thinkingBoss-Employee: boss comes in and yells at you for turning in an assignment late, tell you you’ll never do anything in your career and that you are worthless. Employee: turned in assignment an hour late because he/she was doing extra research that would benefit the company.