Slides used by Values Coach CEO Joe Tye in a presentation for the Indiana Organization of Nurse Executives 10-18-2018

1. How to Become
the Lion in Your Mirror
Indiana Organization of Nurse Executives
October 17, 2018
Joe Tye, CEO and Head Coach
Values Coach Inc.
Copyright © 2018, Values Coach Inc.
1:00-2:00

2. You will never exceed the
expectations that you set
for yourself.

3. You will never exceed
the limitations that you
place on yourself.

4. Stop pretending
to be less than
you really are
and energize
the lion in your
mirror!

5. The Paradox of
Motivation

6. It’s easy to be motivated
when you don’t need to
be motivated

7. It’s hardest to be
motivated at those
times when you
need it most

8. And it’s at those hardest
times that motivation has
the greatest leverage

9. If you wait until you
need motivation to
work on it you
might be too late

10. “The time to patch the roof
is when the sun is shining”
– John F. Kennedy

11. Success and failure won’t
change you…
They will make you
more of who you
already are.

18. We don’t need to be
instructed so much as
we need to be reminded!

20. Disempowering source #1
Low self-esteem

21. Low self-esteem is one of
the most potent weapons
YOWE has to prevent you
from thinking big and acting
on your dreams

22. Low self-esteem
is often an
excuse for
not trying

25. Disempowering source #2
Self-limiting beliefs

26. Self-limiting
beliefs are the
impediments
you place upon
yourself

27. Broke
The Terrible Too’s

28. Or whatever other excuse fits
No one would support me
I don’t have the skills
I don’t have time
The Big But’s

29. You must believe
you are capable
of achieving
your authentic
goals and
>>>>>>>>

31. “Argue for your limitations
and, sure enough, they are
yours.”
Richard Bach: Illusions

32. Disempowering source #3
The negativity
of others

34. The
Strategies

35. Strategy #1
Be clear about
your own
personal values

36. The Power of Values...
The 3 most important
sentences spoken during
the 20th century…

37. We have nothing to
fear but fear itself

38. We shall never
surrender

39. I have a dream

40. What are
your values?

41. Strategy #2
Make fear
your ally

42. Can one person with
courage change the
world?

44. Fear is the most serious
of all learning disabilities!
Edward Hallowell: Worry

45. The absence of
fear is not courage!

47. No Fear,
No Courage…

48. Big Fear,
Big Courage…

49. People who do brave things
do not feel courage

50. Anxiety
Fear
Worry

51. Anxiety

53. Three bad things happen
when you in the thrall of
anxiety...

54. Bad Thing #1
Memory is distorted: past successes
seem small and insignificant while
past failures seem huge and certain
to be repeated.

55. Bad Thing #2
Perception is distorted: the dangers
facing you are blown out of proportion
while you underestimate the resources
you have.

56. Bad Thing #3
Vision is distorted: you cannot
see the possibilities for a great
outcome because you are so
fixated on images of doom.

57. Anxiety tries to
become fear.
Paul Tillich: The Courage to Be

58. Fear

59. You’ve heard that the
acronym F.E.A.R. stands for
Fantasized Evidence
Appearing Real.
It also stands for…

60. Fabulous Excuse
for Avoiding
Responsibility

61. Are people
afraid of
change?

64. Worry

65. Worry is like paying
interest on a debt that you
probably don’t even owe!

66. Toxic worry is abuse
of the God-given gift
of imagination!

67. Anxiety, fear, and worry
can paralyze...

68. Or they can catalyze

69. Strategy #3
Make adversity
your teacher

70. Fear is a reaction,
courage is a decision
Perseverance is
making that decision...

74. 74

75. 75
This story has a
happy ending!

76. “Brick walls are not
there to stop you, they
are there to make you
prove how much you
want something.”
Randy Pausch: The Last Lecture

77. The walls are
not optional

78. Letting them
stop you is

79. Resilience is more than just
bouncing back from adversity

80. It’s growing stronger
through the experience

81. ProceedUntil
Apprehended!

82. Strategy #4
Reprogram
negative self-talk

83. Negative self-talk is
telling yourself lies…
And then believing
those lies to be true.

84. Self-talk is the collection of
stories you tell yourself about
yourself, about other people,
and about how the world works

85. Complaining is an
outward projection of
inner negative self-talk

86. The most important
speech any of us ever give
is the one you were never
trained to give >>>>>

88. 88
What is the
first word
every child
learns to say?

90. For a variety of evolutionary reasons,
the human mind automatically
gravitates toward negative, frightening
and depressing thoughts.
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi: The Evolving Self: A
Psychology for the New Millennium

94. 94
A crucial point!
That voice will always be
in the second person. It’s
not really you talking!!!

95. “I’m not good enough”

96. You’re not
good enough

97. Why is
that?

99. 99
Three steps for using the
power of Metaphorical
Visualization™ to erase the
graffiti of negative self-talk:

100. 100
Step #1
Visualize the words as clearly
as you possibly can as graffiti
that has been scrawled on the
walls of your mental attic.

103. 103
Step #2
Visualize a janitor (The Janitor
in Your Attic™) painting over
the graffiti and replacing it
with positive affirmations.

104. Nobody
likes you

105. Step #3
Replace the bad lies you tell
yourself about yourself with
good lies about yourself...

107. You can rewire
the hardware by
reprogramming
the software!

108. 108
Caveat!
For your challenge to your Spoiled
Inner Brat to be credible you must
also take action if what Brat says is
factually accurate.

109. Strategy #5
Use body
language that
empowers you

110. Your body tells your
mind how you feel…

111. Power Posing

113. How your mouth tells
your mind what to
think…

115. Smile from the outside in and
you’ll eventually be smiling
from the inside out.

116. Strategy #6
Take to heart
The Self
Empowerment
Pledge

118. If you’ve been waiting
for someone else to
empower you, you
should know that…

119. No one can empower you but
YOU – and once you have
empowered yourself...
No one can take
that power away.

120. If you knew it would change
your life for the better –
profoundly and permanently –
would you invest...

121. A minute a day for
the next 365 days

122. Would you give up one
television commercial a
day for a year to
change your life?

123. If your answer is yes,
here’s what you do.

124. Every morning start your
day by making that day’s
promise – which will take
you about 15 seconds.

125. Repeat the promise
again in in the middle
of your work day.

126. Once more before you
leave for home.

128. 4 x 15 seconds
= 1 minute

130. Let’s take a look at the
seven promises...

131. Monday’s Promise: Responsibility
I will take complete responsibility for my
health, my happiness, my success, and
my life, and will not blame others for my
problems or predicaments.

132. Tuesday’s Promise: Accountability
I will not allow low self-esteem,
self-limiting beliefs, or the negativity
of others to prevent me from
achieving my authentic goals
and from becoming the
person I am meant to be.

133. Wednesday’s Promise:
Determination
I will do the things I’m
afraid to do, but which I
know should be done.
Sometimes this will
mean asking for help to
do that which I cannot
do by myself.

134. Thursday’s Promise: Contribution
I will earn the help I need in advance
by helping other people now, and
repay the help I receive by serving
others later.

135. Friday’s Promise: Resilience
I will face rejection and failure
with courage, awareness,
and perseverance,
making these experiences
the platform for future
acceptance and success.

136. Saturday’s Promise: Perspective
Though I might not understand why
adversity happens, by my conscious
choice I will find strength,
compassion, and grace
through my trials.

137. Sunday’s Promise: Faith
My faith and my gratitude for all
that I have been blessed with will
shine through in my attitudes
and in my actions.

138. Here’s WHY it
works...

139. You keep promising yourself that you will be
responsible, accountable, and determined;
make a contribution, be resilient in the face
of adversity, have a positive perspective,
and that your faith will shine through.

140. Then you catch yourself whining and
complaining, procrastinating, gossiping,
blaming others for your problems, taking
when you should be giving, and pretending
that you have no power.

141. Cognitive Dissonance

142. Simultaneously holding onto
two incompatible beliefs

144. At that point, one of two things
MUST happen. Either you take
the easy way and stop making
the promises…

145. Or you keep making the
promises until you begin to
change your attitudes and
your behaviors.

146. And as you do that, you
will begin to achieve better
results in every dimension
of your life.

149. Read these seven promises
one more time...

150. Ask yourself
these two
questions...

151. If you personally take these 7
promises to heart, will you be
better off than where you are
headed now – personally,
professionally, financially, spiritually?

152. If everyone where you work
makes a good faith effort to live
these 7 promises, will you do a
better job of serving customers
and of supporting each other?

153. If your answer to these two
questions is...
And if you’re being
honest, that’s what
your answer will be.

154. Then why wouldn’t
you invest those 365
minutes in yourself?

156. For the 21-module PledgePower course:
Text 66866
Type message valuescoach

158. And one last thing…
Let me introduce you to
the person you once were

171. Wouldn’t it be
nice to become
that you again?