Men cannot sit and expect boys to become men without their inputs. I challenge the men in the society to take up their mantle and let us not blame the society or the government in this. I believe we will not sit and see our boys’ lives destroyed. We can do something about it.

1. Men must TEACH and Build Their Sons into Men
Society has greatly changed. As I grew up, the boy child knew what he was expected to
do at every stage in life. He could be able to learn from the older boys and the younger
men. Yes, he could be disciplined by the older ones if he never did what was expected.
Apparently the culture was very well balanced. The men and women took up their
rightful roles to teach and correct the boys and girls respectively. The trend as I see is
rather disappointing. The boys are growing up only to become older boys; never maturing
to a place of living as mature Godly men. The boy child needs to grow in a Godly way.
He has to be guided well.
Ephesians 4:1
I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with
which you were called, (NKJV)
What we have now are boys who have no clue what it means to be a man, leave alone
being Godly man. Some two weeks ago a friend came visiting with us and we had
lengthy discussion on my past and how I brought up my three daughters and a son who
are all adults. The father in the home must play his rightful role and be a model that the
boys would want to imitate.
As I interacted with my children I was able to provide the necessary leadership. My
dealing with my son was to harden him to be a responsible person who would take up his
role of the man in his home when he marries. You cannot let the society mould our sons.
The society is not kind. The older men must ask: ‘What has God instructed me as the
father to teach my children and in light of the culture we live in; what are some practical
areas that I need to build into them as well?’
The following are areas each father must instill in their sons:
1. Teach them about God. Deuteronomy 6:4-9
"Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! You shall love the LORD your
God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. "And these
words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them
diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when
you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. You shall bind them
as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall
write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. (NKJV)
Teach the boys to begin to learn about God by showing them who He is with easy,
concrete examples. God is a warrior, a strong tower, a rock, a strong foundation, a dad,
etc. Easy to understand concepts that help build a picture in their minds about who He is.

2. 2. Teach them to work -- hard. Genesis 2:15
‘Then the LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to tend and
keep it’. (NKJV)
God created work for men. This was not a result of sin. Before sin entered the world, God
had already instructed Adam to tend the garden. An area that is so disappointing is the
one of work. We have very many young people that want it easy. They don’t want to tire.
They would rather sit and are given. This is a bad habit which is making men look like
babies. God is a worker and our boys must learn to work. As I grew up my mother
encouraged us to work hard. I left home at age 19, and I never depended on my parents or
anybody else after that. I worked.
3. Teach them to obey. Ephesians 6:1
‘Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right’. (NKJV)
This is consistent throughout scripture. Obey God. In order for them to do that, they need
to learn on a smaller level. Teach them to obey quickly, consistently and joyfully.
As part of this, we want them to know there are consequences to sin; one of those is
separation. Many of us have stories of people around us who lost their jobs, their families
or their integrity by sinful decisions in their lives. We want to teach them early how when
they choose to disobey, there are consequences.
4. Teach them to lead. Titus 2:6-8
‘Likewise, exhort the young men to be sober-minded, in all things showing yourself to
be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility,
sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be
ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you’. (NKJV)
This is leading by taking responsibility; a leading that is motivated by serving. You know
how little boys try to whine because they are trying to explain why they made the poor
choice they made. The boys must learn how to lead by taking responsibility. The boys
need to learn what it looks like to offer their strength to others: to those that are being
picked on, to women, to their friends. Our culture consistently offers us pictures of men
who are greedy, prideful and starving for more power. Teaching the boys what it looks
like to lead begins by teaching them to take responsibility.
5. Teach them to love. Ephesians 5:2
‘And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering
and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma’. (NKJV)

3. What does it look like to love God, love your wife, and love your kids? What does it look
like for a dad to submit his heart to God, and to seek to follow him daily? Boys must see
their fathers reading the Bible in the morning. They need to see the fathers loving their
mothers and then the fathers can lovingly teach, encourage, train and disciple them.
Finally
We cannot sit and expect our boys to become men without our inputs. I challenge the
men in the society to take up their mantle and let us not blame the society or the
government in this. The boy child is easily inclined to peer and societal pressure. I
believe we will not sit and see our boys’ lives destroyed. We can do something about it.