A response to Dave McClure's snarky "Why NOT To Do a Startup" PowerPoint tirade. As if anyone gives a damn about slideshows - I mean, it's not as if they help entrepreneurs get funding or anything. Ah well, enjoy it all the same! ;-)

1. #1. Why NOT be an angel investor? … because chances are you’ll lose your Thomas Pink shirt on the deal, & everyone will say “serve you right, ass-wipe”.

2. #2. But you got lucky & cashed out once, didn’t you? No matter how overwhelming your sense of personal entitlement is, lightning rarely strikes twice. Sorry!

3. #3. You’re on a quest to find & fund the “Next Big You”, right? Investing to try to glorify your past lucky decisions makes you resemble an ass trying to kiss its own butt.

4. #4. Your angel networks don’t suck THAT much, do they? Actually, they do - and getting entrepreneurs to pony up for them is dishonest. More canapés, sweety?

5. #5: You know that clever business model you like? … it’ll NEVER work for startups. Same goes for your bass-ackward valuations.

6. #6: You haven't read a business plan in 5 years, right? … but you still want them sent in. Hahahahahahahaha! Hilarious!

7. #7: You play safe by putting in jack money per round, right? … but wonder why nobody wants to lead, and why entrepreneurs don’t want you on the board.

8. #8: You laugh at J-curves (and, in fact, at all graphs) … when that's the only way your L053R-80Y bets will ever pay off. Hahahahahaha!

9. #9. You’d Rather Just Snark About Entrepreneurs … Than Look At Your Own Damaged Worldview. Ridiculous!

10. #10. You’ll only invest in hot deals with tons of social proof. … but you like to keep all your leads to yourself. Side-splitting!