This document summarizes key aspects of the author's family dynamics and communication patterns. The author comes from a blended family after his parents' divorce. Some key elements discussed include family themes of closeness and support; rituals like annual Ranger parties; distinct roles like the father providing and mother maintaining kinship; a mix of connected and cohesive cohesion; inherent family conflicts; the father traditionally making decisions; and commitment to starting a new family.
2. Family can be defined as networks
of people who share their lives over
long periods of time bound by ties of
marriage, blood, law, or commitment
who consider themselves as family
and share a significant history and
anticipated future of functioning as a
family. I originally came from a two-
parent biological family. After 20
years of marriage my parents
divorced. My father has since re-
married and now I have a blended
family.
3. ! Each family has a theme. A theme can be viewed as a pattern of feelings,
motives, fantasies, and conventionalized understandings grouped around
a particular form in the personalities of individual members.
“You can always depend on family” was a theme my father instilled in me and
my siblings as we grew up. We are a very close group, everyone keeps in touch,
visits one another frequently, and everyone knows that a family member can be
relied upon. Themes are an important part of understanding the communication
behavior of a family.
4. Rituals
A family ritual is defined as a voluntary, recurring patterned communication
event whose jointly enacted performance by family members pays homage to
what they regard as sacred, thereby producing and reproducing a family!s
identity.
My family is a hockey family. Everyone in my family is a
die hard New York Rangers fan. It has become tradition
for us to get together for a few games a year and we
make lots of food and have fun together. We have been
having these “Ranger Parties” for the last 15 years.
5. Family Roles
! Each member of my family has a specific role. These recurring
patterns of behavior have developed over the years. These roles
exist only within the family dynamic.
! My dad is the provider of the basic resources, he has worked
multiple jobs over the years to provide for the family.
! My mother provides family management and kinship
maintenance. She is the one who keeps us connected with our
extended family in New York.
! My stepmother provides nurturing and emotional support. She
takes care of my younger brother and sister and performs many
traditionally domestic tasks. She is a great cook, and everyone
looks forward to visiting because we know we are going to get a
great meal!
6.
7. Communication and Power
! The dynamic of one-up and one-down positions existed in both of my father!s
marriages. In each marriage he was the one-up person or the one who
attempts to exercise more power control over another. In each marriage my
mother and step mother are the one-down person or the one who accepts the
control implied from my father.
! As kids we we were in the one-down position but as we have grown up we take
on new roles.
8. Communication Patterns
! Cohesion is defined as the emotional bonding that family
members experience with each other and includes concepts of
“emotional bonding, boundaries, coalitions, time, space, friends,
decision-making, interests and recreation”.
! My family!s cohesion levels are a mix of…
! Connected: “family members experience emotional
independence as well as some sense of involvement and
belonging”
! Cohesive: “family members strive for emotional closeness,
loyalty, and togetherness with emphasis on some
individuality.
9.
10. Conflict
! Conflict is an express struggle between at least two
interdependent parties, who perceive in compatible goals,
scarce resources, and interference from the other party in
achieving their goals.
! Conflict naturally exists in any family and my family is no
exception. Because we are a blended family, conflict arises
between my father and mother concerning issues within the
family. Because my siblings and I are older, we also have
opinions about how the family dynamic should be and that can
create additional conflict.
11. Decision Making
! Decision making is the process by which family members makes
choices, reach judgments or arrive at solutions that end
uncertainty.
! My dad has always be the primary decision maker for our family.
He set the rules for my siblings and I to follow. It can be a tough
role, being the decision maker, each decision will have an effect
on each family member, and often will have different effects on
different members.
12. Commitment
! Commitment implies intense singular energy directed toward
sustaining a relationship. Many couples view commitment as a
lifetime promise to stay in the marriage.
! My fiancée and I are getting ready to start our own family. In our
relationship there is a high level of personal dedication, which
involves one!s internal devotion to the relationship.
