Everyone can benefit from pursuing personal development in their life but it is not always an easy task. There is a lot of work that needs to be done to create the life we desire. Ask anyone living their dream life and they will let you know the work was worth it.

1. Personal Development and You
http://www.wiggmanscoaching.com/personal- development- and- you/ March 23, 2013
Why are so many people hesitant to start personal
development coaching?
It can be very tough and scary to admit where we are
unhappy in life.
Chances are if you admit where you are unhappy
someone you care about will be hurt by what you have to
say.
This holds us back from expressing what we need to
express.
You think by burying those feelings deep down inside you are protecting others.
They will never have to know how you truly feel.
I am going to tell you something you already know.
You are going to hurt them anyway and here is why….
When you go through life feeling unhappiness and grudgingly accepting that this is
just the way life was meant to be and you accept it you are lying to yourself.
Every day that passes that you lie to yourself you grow more negative towards
yourself internally.
Our external world is a direct reflection of our internal world.
If you are experiencing an increasingly negative external world you are most likely
unhappy internally. Take a quick moment to reflect on how your life really is right
now.
You tell yourself you should be happy because of how great your life is and yet
the negativity and anger just builds and builds.
When we try to bottle up our unhappiness we usually explode in a raging ball of
emotions over the smallest of things.
Then we argue or fight with the ones we love and the hurt feelings happen
anyway.

2. For all the wrong reasons. Not that you want to hurt someone’s feelings
intentionally but now the message you are trying to express will be muddied by
the negativity.
Sound familiar?
By trying to avoid our feelings we create the exact results we didn’t want.
Personal development creates the self-awareness and confidence you need to
fully express yourself through conscious choice not with a feeling of being out of
control.
Your Body Tells the Tale
The alternative is to continue trying to go it alone and potentially cause more than
hurt feelings like actual physical damage to your body.
Your body will always physically show your feelings no matter how good you think
you are at hiding them.
As my wife so lovingly says “Tell your face that!” every time I try to hide away
from what is affecting me by saying I’m fine or nothing’s wrong. Just a bunch of
lies to avoid looking bad which makes me look bad because I lied.
Our bodies can only handle so much internal stress before our physical wellbeing
suffers also.
Notice I said internal stress. This is because our outside stresses are not really
stress at all being we can’t control them.
When we can’t control something we needn’t be stressed by it. But that is a post
for another day.
Right now I simply want you to focus on those negative internal feelings you have
and discover where they may be coming from. What triggers those feelings?
I want you to also recognize where you carry those feelings in your body. Is it
your neck, lower back or stomach?
Show me a happy person and they will walk differently than an unhappy person.
They will have better posture, make more eye contact and generally exude
positive energy.
They will give you a quick smile even though they don’t know you. Just because.

3. A Quick Personal Story
I know how personal development can make a difference because I have
experienced it. Right before my career with lululemon athletica ended I had the
opportunity to be coached by someone who wanted the best for me.
I also wanted to be coached which is key to successful personal development.
She helped me discover how I was angry with myself for never having taken the
chance at following what my goals were. At the time I didn’t even know exactly
what those goals were which made me even angrier.
I just knew what I was doing wasn’t satisfying me but I loved parts of it like
coaching and needed help clarifying what I was meant to do.
Without digging around like that I would have continued to drift away from family
and friends believing I could figure it all out on my own. I couldn’t and without
personal development the people I love would have been the ones who suffered
even longer.
Ask for help. There is nothing wrong with it.
By developing a heightened state of self-awareness through personal
development I learned to read my own body to the point where I could consciously
choose my actions not just react.
I still do over react in certain situations but I am working hard at figuring out what
the triggers are so I can control those emotions.
Where does my stress show up? One of my eyes will go completely bloodshot
red and I look like a terminator or that I have pink eye. I also have a spot right
under my left shoulder blade that knots instantly.
How about yours?
Take Action Request:
The next time you feel the urge to bottle up feelings you wished you could
express I want you to write down in your journal exactly what you wish you could
have said and how your body physically felt in the moment. This is the first step
in being able to acknowledge what you are feeling and starting to recognize how
your body reacts to those feelings.
The more you write the more you will become confident to physically express in
words how you feel.

4. I want you to have the best life and it doesn’t matter to me if you choose to coach
with me as long as you coach with someone. We could all use a little help now
and then.
Darrin Wiggins
P.S. This is not designed as a sales pitch but merely a way for you to consider the
possibilities personal development can create for you. I spent many years
resisting taking on my “uglies” and I hope you don’t make that same mistake.
“What would you be like if you were the only person in the world? If
you want to be truly happy you must be that person.” – Quentin Crisp