A true story about one mother's struggle to reach her son's heart while he was incarcerated in the State of Slovakia.

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Jesus Christ
who do you think you are?
Copyright text 2013 by Henni Racik
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any
means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording, or
any information storage and retrieval system, except in the case of
brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews, without
written permission from the author.
2011
Cover and page design created by Ikar4u and Google images
A special thanks to my Family
from my heart.
Printed in Canada
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In this book you will discover courage, strength, belief and healing to
life’s most important gift a human has to offer oneself, “The Heart”. It
is one mother’s love to reach her son’s tortured soul through her words
from her own heart. It is with hope that her words transform a young
man named Erico, to save his soul. It is with Perfection’s strength and
faith in this woman’s words to heal not only her son from the number
one silent killer called “Depression” but others in our chaotic and mad
world.
A TRUE S T O R Y!
All events set forth in this account are factual as well as re-
searched. However, the names of certain individuals and institu-
tions have not been revealed and certain or their characteristics
have been changed in this book.
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“Jesus Christ”
who do you think you are?
Henni R acik
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Two hands, two hearts, two lives join
two separate journeys
forever into
a precious
world
of
One Heart,
One Soul,
One Love,
till the end of Time.
A Mother and child.
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The Mastering Language of Love Lecturers
I would like to address the translation of my first self-published
educational healing book “Jesus Christ-who do you think you are? This
has been written at a time of real life testing endurance. It happened
last year when my son was incarcerated in Slovakia and by writing to
him was the only way I could communicate with him. Praying and
writing was my way to save his soul, and keep both him and me from
going insane. It was the teaching and guidance to a young man's life at a
time of great difficulty and trial period. Our path is one heck of a
journey, more like a roller coaster and if we take the wrong turns or rides
in life, we end up going in circles of suffering in daily life episodes within
ourselves. Therefore, this book was my son's guideline to life in making
him understand and accept his present situation. Life is about learning,
living and loving. So, how to help yourself and others can only happen if
you help yourself first, then a higher being as (Perfection) God will guide
you into the right direction. I care for you, and share with you the tools
to have a successful and more so a godly life .
The fact that everyday people swear by and read the bible,
then how can it be possible there are so many illnesses in the world?
Humans have lost touch with the importance of life through the
human heart. We must learn to love again with our hearts for ever y-
one needs the human touch. We are all t he same, playing the game of
life. To become a master in life one must grasp the language of love.
We all have a life story to write and tell, each one of us is his /her
own story teller. In this book you will find a true story, from one
mother’s words to her son. Every child needs to be loved, but with real
unconditional love. This can only be achieved through Perfection’s
love. To become worthy of oneself is to love oneself and others through
understanding, commitment, and courage to be a true friend to
yourself and others. You must want to save yourself. This process will
evolve with one word; care. (Ikar4u). Therefore, I have written to you
from my heart,
Imagine with all your mind
Believe with all your heart
Achieve with all your might
Create who you are
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Table of Contents
Introduction…………………….. 9
Preface ……..…...13
Trust .…………..…....…….... 21
Hope ..…………….... 26
Care ………….. 33
Belief ….……. 41
Love ….………..…….. 50
Crucifixion …….…..………. 61
Inconclusive ……………...…. 66
Notes ……….……. 68
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Introduction
.
This book is essentially the talks of lectures that I have written
to my son during his days of incarceration. He was arrested in the
State of Slovakia in September 2011, as he entered studies at the
Komarno University. Upon his acceptance he was still on the side
effects of pharmaceutical drugs. My son has been suffering in de-
pression that had been silently killing his soul. At first, I was think-
ing of calling the book, “From Madness of Life” but in the daily pro-
cess of writing, I felt I should call it “Jesus Christ”- who do you think
you are? It is about Life’s mystery of finding ourselves and caring
for whom we are as well as where we are headed that truly matters
in life. The book gives meaning to finding one’s way to the heart. It
is everyone’s responsibility to find his or her purpose and path to
the mind, body and soul. Life is short, so hold on to it and never let
go, because to know who you are is the greatest gift of all, given to
anyone. But, depression, can affect anyone at any given time. De-
pression accounts for a tremendous amount of the medical costs of
healthcare in our world today. It is also one of the most sought after
market in profit making in the world. But, it can be a taboo subject
in public and the church, because many people are ashamed to ad-
mit that they suffer from this condition. It can be perceived as a
symbol of weakness, especially among males.
As you might expect, that bible does address the subject of depres-
sion in-depth. This is not a new phenomenon, nor is it just a "last
days" condition (though I definitely believe the church is under at-
tack like never before because the devil knows that he has but a
short time). As we read from Genesis to Revelation, we find men
and women who were faced with hardships and emotional strug-
gles. Even David, the man "after God's own heart" found himself
desperately discouraged at times (just read the psalms if you don't
believe me).
This book is not intended to discredit the benefits of modern medical
treatment, or to condemn those who seek medical help for this con-
dition. By all means, use all resources available to help you. The
purpose of this book is to show you that Perfection cares about your
innermost feelings, and She wants to give you peace where there is
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anxiety and joy where there is depression, and hope where there is
despair.
You may discover that the shadows and tempests of depression alter
the way you look at Perfection and the way you believe it looks at
you. When you pray you may be unable to sit still or to keep your
mind focused for more than a few moments. Everything may ap-
pear to be a huge gaping hole of silence, all so useless. Perfection
may seem to be mocking your attempts to pray. I know people who
have gone three, five, ten years without "praying," though they
were faithful to setting time aside for prayer regardless of its seem-
ing uselessness. In the haunting darkness where all communication
had gone silent, they found loneliness, boredom, frustration, and
anger. Were they praying? Yes. But did they know Perfection that
is to save the soul? No. You must be disciplined, and committed to
believe in yourself, and what you can do, and the relationship you
will have with God in your life. And in the contents of this book I
will introduce to you the topic Bipolar. The exact beginning I will
start with is Jesus Christ. The question to ask you is: Was Jesus
Christ Bipolar?
Many successful people throughout time in history were known to
be bipolar. For example, Vincent Van Gogh, Emily Dickinson, Kurt
Cobain, Ernest Hemingway, Albert Einstein and Beethoven, just to
name a few. Does Jesus Christ belong on this list as well? The truth
is we’ll never know but we do have theories, so here is mine:
If at the time there were psychiatrists around when Jesus Christ
was alive, he’d be diagnosed- “bipolar I disorder” with psychotic
symptoms and put on heavy medication. Given that psychology is
such a young and underdeveloped area of study, the only thing I
find myself attaching to is the obvious similarities between these
successful artists, Jesus Christ and the 1% of the population that is
considered bipolar. I believe we are all the sons and daughters of
whatever it is that created this universe. I don’t exactly know what
religion to believe, but what I am sure of is that creativity is some-
how involved in the notion of God. The link between creativity and
bipolar disorder is widely accepted as fact. Maybe the truth behind
Jesus’ stories are simply false delusions from his psychosis, but on
the other hand, maybe Jesus’ stories are true from his psychosis.
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Signature traits of hypomania and mania include:
(1) Delusions of grandeur and
(2) Religiosity, believing you’re the son of God and your mother is a
virgin may fall under these categories.
(3) Hyper sexuality, Mary Magdalene, a prostitute, is notorious for
being one of Jesus’ most important disciples, perhaps he was initial-
ly drawn to her because of his extreme passionate and sexual traits.
(4) Pressured speech, which is pretty much a fancy term for talking
your face off, might cause preaching to five thousand people and
gathering apostles.
(5) Irritability and rage, which could explain why Jesus confronted
the moneychangers, also known as the Cleansing of the Tem-
ple, causing a riot by over-turning tables and spilling money on the
floor.
In many cases, Bipolar I disorder starts with a hypomanic episode,
progressing to a manic episode and then landing off in a psychosis.
A psychosis is when the person cannot differentiate between reality
and their imagination. A manic psychosis may include auditory
hallucinations, visual hallucinations and delusional beliefs.
The main delusions are:
(1) Ertomania, the belief that a person of high status is in love with
them, in Jesus’ case it was God.
(2) Grandiosity, the belief that they are more powerful, has special
abilities, attain unique knowledge or that they’re gifted. No man
can enter Heaven but through me is a little grandeur in my view.
(3) Jealousy, the belief that someone is cheating them, like when Ju-
das was believed to have betrayed Jesus.
(4) Persecutory, the belief that they are being persecuted, and some-
times even followed and watched, which I’m sure he was after mak-
ing such a ruckus in public, and perhaps this belief led him to his
death.
(5) Somatic, the belief that something is physically wrong.
Let’s get back to Mary Magdalene. According to the Gospels, she
watched as Jesus was crucified (Mark 15:40) and later when in his
tomb (15:47.) She kept vigil beside his tomb and when Jesus appeared
she wasn’t able to recognize him. Since a vigil implies being up all
night, sleep deprivation does cause hallucinations. A key trait of
mania is also a decreased need for sleep.
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Now let’s talk about the dark lows of bipolar disorder. His submis-
sion at the garden of Gethsemane really captivates the emotions of
the lows: the longing to throw in the towel and get down on your
knees, the disgust with desires and temptations, wanting only to
bask in your sorrow. “Get up and pray so that you will not fall into
temptation. “ (Mark 14:32-42)
Jesus fasted for forty days and forty nights in the wilderness. Dur-
ing depressive episodes, people tend to isolate themselves, their sleep
patterns and appetite are disrupted and they’re haunted with dark
visions. Sleep deprivation and not eating right can also cause hallu-
cinations. Since I have experienced the feelings of religiosity, the
feeling that you have a spiritual purpose here on earth, I truly be-
lieve Jesus must have felt this way too. I think Bipolar Disorder
coupled with an exceptional mind is the exact formula that made
Jesus Christ such an exceptional historical figure.
What is Bipolar Disorder? It is normal to experience ups-and –
downs, good days and bad days and the occasional I should never
have gotten out of bed day, but as a general rule it is important to
retain an inner calm or a middle ground to which we always re-
turn. However, individuals with Bipolar disorder experience ex-
treme mood swings. They tend to lose their inner balance, finding
themselves at the far ends of the emotional spectrum. They may
even find themselves alternating between periods of exuberant ela-
tion or mania, when anything seems possible, and periods of deep
despairing depression that leaves them in bed for weeks and unable
to function in their day-to day lives. Symptoms of Bipolar disorder
(sometimes referred to as manic depression) differ greatly between
individuals. Some may enter a state of hypomania which is milder
form of mania, while others may have full blown manic (dramatic)
episodes. These episodes often involve elaborate ideas, an elevated
state of happiness and wild plans. For example; a person having a
manic episode may max out three credit cards and start tearing
down walls with the idea of building themselves a mansion. At the
time, these irrational ideas seem absolutely possible and will lead to
great success and fortune. But what goes up must come down and
as a result, these manic states are often followed by periods of deep
depression as the individual comes down from their high. To this
day there is no scientific proof of what is Bipolar.
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Preface
*Perfection- reference God throughout the book
To understand *Perfection (God) is to understand Life. To allow Per-
fection (God) in your life is acknowledging life’s equality to living.
Sin is in the world, Jesus, God’s son came on earth to take away the
sins of the world, so SHE had sacrificed her only son to give new life
and meaning to us. In order to love in an unconditional form of
love, we must learn who we are. You can become reunited with Per-
fection (God) as one of Godly children by cleansing your heart and
accepting Christ as your savior, redeemer and natural soul healer.
Perfection (God) is asking us that we live as it taught us through its
own example and nature in its actions and not just words written
in the bible. However to question these words are part of life’s mys-
tery, but, we must lead by actions. We must challenge mankind to
care for other people and the amazing world of Perfection (God)
created. This act is called Stewardship.
So, what is stewardship?
“Follow Me,” Jesus simply but powerfully commanded of the Apos-
tles and they did. That call is made to us as well on this day and in
this time. How do we follow Jesus? We try to live our lives as Jesus
Christ- the perfect steward. And more importantly, how do we find
the way to the human heart in the presence of Perfection. Steward-
ship is discipleship. It is the care and use of all that we have been
given by Perfection and is often explained in terms of talent, treas-
ure and time. Why? Because communication requires that a mes-
sage is sent and received and explaining stewardship in simple
terms is more effective. Here is a way to look at these aspects of
stewardship.
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Talent
We are all blessed with so many talents and yet we may not know
they exist. Talents are found in your personality, your interests and
in your skills. Those who love interacting with people, love to talk
and love to be with groups have incredible talents to assist with the
love of Perfection. Those who are skilled in trades or have profes-
sional abilities are gifted with talents that can support not only a
sanctuary, Hral (Haven Racik Academy of Life) to be developed
with the Velvet Evolution Universe Tour but also charitable works
throughout the community. Your skills and knowledge can be put to
curing many ills in our society. Your use of talent for the work of
Perfection is one of the most personally fulfilling opportunities of
your lifetime. Payment in a smile, in relief of suffering or in lending
a hand to someone in desperate need is greater than any material
payment you will ever receive in this lifetime to be happy ever af-
ter.
Treasure
Treasure is a gift and also a burden. We become consumed with ma-
terial goods. Yet, life can be lived very simply if we choose. It is not
wrong to enjoy many of the amazing luxuries life has to offer.
However, justice requires us to consider the needs of others as we
enjoy the gifts we have been given. To some, food and housing has
become a luxury they are unable to obtain. In order to appreciate
life’s bountiful resources, we must share the wealth of the basic ne-
cessities of life. Water, food, education and shelter, this is the root of
civilization. We can achieve to flourish life’s treasures if we learn to
care and give from the heart.
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T ime
The gift of time is just that – a gift. None of us know exactly how
much time we have been granted on this earth. In the time that we
have, we are asked to use that time effectively by continuing the
mission of Jesus Christ throughout our days. Each day has 24 hours
and consists of time at work, time at rest and time with family and
friends. We sleep about 8 hours a day on average, work about 8
hours and therefore have 8 hours for “other things." At rest, we
sleep or at least try, so that we may regain strength for our next
day. Sleep is essential in considering the body as a temple. In addi-
tion to sleep, doing what we can to keep our bodies healthy and
strong helps us lead productive lives on behalf of Perfection.
At work, our professions should help develop a better world – in
some way – while how we work should better us personally in many
ways. Your interaction with colleagues, customers, employees, em-
ployers and others should be conducted in the spirit of the second of
Perfection’s great commandments “love thy neighbor as we love
ourselves.” This includes the often stressful drive to and from home!
Our twenty four hours of the day are filled with so much at home,
work, school, or with friends and neighbors. Family responsibility is
so important and a major part of what is connecting our faith for-
mation. Both away from home and at home, we are responsible for
handling on the faith to future generations.
How we interact with people in front of children teaches valuable
lessons on how to live. And to be able to we interact understand
time, we then can be optimistic to Trust our time here on earth.
Time is ticking. Make the most of yours by using all of your gifts to
follow in the guideline of life. Talent, Treasure, and Time, learn
these gifts and appreciate each one for how they relate in your life.
Repeat to yourself, I want to be talented and have a heart filled
with a treasure of time that is my gift in life.
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God loves us
The divinity of Christ is clearly established Colossians 2:9 "For in
Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily.” This is proof that
Jesus is God who can forgive sins, heal our body, and give eternal
life to anyone who will trust in believing faith on His atonement for
sin.
God appeared to Moses, who asked Exodus 3:13-14 “Suppose I go
to the Israelites and say to them, ‘The God of your fathers has sent
me to you,’ and they ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what shall I
tell them?" God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM. This is what you
are to say to the Israelites: ‘I AM has sent me to you.’"
Jesus said from heaven Revelation 1:8 "I am the Alpha and the
Omega, the Beginning and the End, who is and who was and who is
to come, the Almighty." Only God knows the beginning and the end
of everything. Colossians 1:19 "It pleased the Father that in him
should all fullness dwell.” The Trinity is God the Father, Jesus Christ
the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
There are only two categories in the universe—God who is eter-
nal, and His creation that is temporal. Since Jesus is not part of
creation, so He would have to be God. We pray to God Matthew 6:6
“who is unseen;” so the apostle said 2 Corinthians 4:18 “things seen
are temporary, but things unseen are eternal.”
Thomas made a profound statement when he said to Jesus John
20:28, “My Lord and my God.” Jesus then added John 20:29 “Thom-
as, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they
that have not seen, and yet have believed.”
True believers in Christ are Titus 2:13-14 ”Looking for that
blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our
Saviour Jesus Christ; Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem
us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people,
zealous of good works.” Jesus’ ability to offer salvation is because
He is fully God and fully man. If He was not human He could not
have died for our sins, and if He was not God He could not forgive
them.
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Jesus is the Word and the Word is God John 1:1, so the Father
speaks through His Word to inform us of the One on whom we must
place our trust. Hebrews 1:8 "To the Son He says: ‘Your throne, O
God, is forever and ever.” We must overcome in the faith, to have
our name in the Book of Life. John 5:4 "For whatever is born of
God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has over-
come the world—our faith.”
Jesus is God who told us to John 15:4 ”Abide in me, and I in you.
As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine;
no more can ye, except ye abide in me.” When we pray to the Fa-
ther, we pray to the Son. It was Jesus who took our place on the
cross to disable the sin nature in us, and to enable the divine nature
to control—a new nature that wants to trust God in believing faith
for everything—health, healing, protection, provisions, guidance,
justice, and freedom from sinful desires.
Scripture confirms Mark 12:32 ”There is one God; and there is
none other but he.” Then Jesus assures Revelation 1:17-18 “Fear not;
I am the first and the last: I am he that liveth, and was dead; and,
behold, I am alive for evermore, Amen; and have the keys of hell
and of death.”
Only God could say what Jesus said; and only He could offer
what He offered. Jesus, as God, will be taken seriously. Galatians
6:7 “Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man so-
weth, that shall he also reap”. The Father, the Son, and the Holy
Spirit have our best spiritual interest at heart. The Father loves us,
the Son forgives us, and the Holy Spirit inspires us to believe in
faith on the atonement for sin. Many deny that Jesus is God, but
we know that He is God, and that we must put a trusting faith on
His atonement for our sins.
That blood sacrifice enables us to claim healing without our trust
on medicine; to claim protection without our trust on devices; to
claim needed finances without our trust on bank loans, and to claim
in faith everything else where trust on God is required. In our
hearts, we are to “set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to
give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the
hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” 1 Peter
3:15.
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Jesus is God, but not the person of the Holy Father. Hebrews
2:14 “Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and
blood—Jesus also became flesh and blood by being born in human
form. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying
could he break the power of the Devil, who had the power of death.”
The apostle said Philippians 2:5-7 ”Your attitude should be the
same that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not demand
and cling to his rights as God. He made himself nothing; he took the
humble position of a slave [no reputation] and appeared in human
form.”
When Jesus said John 14:28 “my Father is greater than I,” He is
referring only to His Father’s position. God is God because of His
nature—the same nature of Jesus Philippians 2:6. Pharaoh had a
greater position as king than Joseph as governor, and says to him
Genesis 41:40, "You shall be in charge of my palace, and all my peo-
ple are to submit to your orders. Only with respect to the throne
will I be greater than you." Pharaoh was over Joseph only by office
because they had the same nature.
The president of a company has a higher position than the em-
ployee, but he is not greater in nature. A husband is the head of the
home, but he and his wife both have the same nature. 1 Corinthians
11:3 "I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ;
and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is
God." Jesus was submissive to the Father’s position, but He is not
less in nature.
During the growing years of Jesus, Scripture says Luke 2:51 ”He
went down with [Joseph and Mary], and came to Nazareth, and
was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her
heart.” Jesus was submissive to His parents as a son, and was obe-
dient to God because of His position as the heavenly Father.
1 John 5:20 ”We know also that the Son of God has come and has
given us understanding, so that we may know him who is true.
And we are in him who is true—even in his Son Jesus Christ. He is
the true God and eternal life.” Jesus was both human and divine, so
He could die as man to pay for our sins as God.
We must understand the incarnation of Christ to know that God
is with us in Person. There are millions of false teachers giving mil-
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lions of false messages that could jeopardize one’s eternal life, be-
cause they omit Jesus’ teaching on believing faith and trust for heal-
ing, finances, justice, forgiveness, and all other faith issues that
cannot be omitted. John 3:18 “He who trusts in Him does not come
up for judgement. He who does not trust has already received sen-
tence, because he has not his trust resting on the name of God’s only
Son.”
Jesus told us John 14:14 "If you ask anything in my name, I will
do it.” If a believer in the United States, Africa, or the Philippines
all prayed to Jesus at the same time, He would have to be God to
answer each individual request. David said, Psalm 139:7 ” Or where
can I flee from Your presence?” Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Jesus said to the young man Luke 18:19 “Why do you call me
good? No one is good—except God alone,” to see if he knew that it
was God who was speaking to him in Person. Jesus told him to obey
the Commandments, and then gave a lesson on financial trust. He
said, Luke 18:22 "There is still one thing wanting in you. Sell every-
thing you possess and give the money to the poor, and you shall
have wealth in Heaven; and then come, follow me."
Jesus said John 3:36 “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal
life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God’s wrath
remains on him.” John 5:24 "He who hears My word and believes
in Him who sent Me has everlasting life, and shall not come into
judgment, but has passed from death into life.” The unbelieving
Jews rejected Jesus because He referred to Himself as Yahweh or I
AM Almighty God, but that is who He is. John 8:24 “If you do not
believe that I am the one I claim to be, you will indeed die in your
sins.” Only the Father can forgive our sins, and only the Son could
atone for them.
Every prayer made in Jesus’ Name—for protection, peace, pro-
visions, deliverance, healing, divine wisdom, and victory over Sa-
tan’s power—is based on the fact that Jesus is God who has promised
these things to anyone who will trust Him in faith—not trusting
something else. Trusting God means getting on our knees, confessing
our sins to Him, and then acting in faith on what He has promised.
Most professing believers do not give God anything to do—with
a million substitutes ahead of God, or they seriously limit His pow-
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er; nevertheless, He is present on earth to do great things for His
children. Matthew 28:20 “Lo, I am with you always, even unto the
end of the world,” so anything we could need spiritually, physically,
or materially is available from Him.
We pray to Jesus as God because Matthew 28:18 "All authority
has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.” He who created the
world, parted the sea, and healed the sick is standing by to do what-
ever we need done. Our part—John 15:7 ”If ye abide in me, and my
words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done
unto you.”
My Mind is clearer now and all too well
I can see where we all soon will be
If you strip away the myth from the man
You will see where we all soon will be
Jesus Christ! You’ve started to believe
The things they say of you
You really do believe
This talk of God is true
And all the good you’ve done
Will soon get swept away
You’ve begun to matter more
Than the things you say
Listen Jesus Christ, who do you think you are?
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Do you trust the human race?
Don’t you see we must keep in our place?
We are occupied – have you forgotten how put down we are?
I am frightened by the crowd
For we are getting much too loud
And they’ll crush us if we go too far
Listen Jesus Christ, who do you think you are? With all my love,
mom
October 7, 2011
To my dear and only son,
I hope that this letter will find your heart, and let your feel-
ings express outward towards yourself.
My heart bleeds that you are in such a nightmare of a situation.
“Darkness”, a man’s worst enemy as is his loneliness. I don’t know
how to begin to tell you how I feel. But, I can imagine how you are
feeling. If you can believe me that all day I keep thinking about
you. I have tried to wonder what you are eating, on what you are
sleeping, and even thinking. I can also imagine all the hurt you
must be going through I know deep in your heart you are searching
for love. We all seek to be loved and cared for in life. I can see a
very tired, confused young man. He’s angry, but not too angry, at
himself more in blame of others rather than in search of himself. He
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is sad, well sort of, but he is more hurting on the inside. So I think
and wonder if he loves me... I hope he does and still needs me, as
well as confides in me as to what he feels in his heart. To have a
bleeding heart that is fragile and needs healing is a work of time.
I want you to know that your sister, father and I truly do care
about you. I honestly, am deeply hurting for all the pain you pres-
ently have to cope with as learn to decide, and deal with in your
life. To love is to show understanding. I trust myself to be able to
show you how I feel, and hope you will do the same. I can envision
how much you are struggling with life’s odd balls, and know it is not
that easy to catch each chaotic game of winnings, especially to re-
main in Perfection’s path of life’s destiny. I know you are a young
man that has seen and experienced too much in a very short period
of time. You have had to grow up at a rapid speed to understand
life’s teachings.
In our world to have someone that makes sacrifices for you is show-
ing care. In this world you need to understand what real love is. I
know you are living through really hard times, but your needs must
know that you are an adult. You need to obey rules and laws if you
don’t, then you need to go living on an island where you can be
your own ruler. As you are learning to live with society’s mistakes,
it in turn reflects on you too. Try to remember to be the best you
can be, but understand that nobody is perfect - only that being a
higher being known as Perfection. But I always try to be better
than myself, even if I make mistakes - we all learn from our mis-
takes. But smart people; really learn from other people’s mistakes. I
know that you are still young and are not sure about life but one
thing you must know is that I love you no matter what in this
world. I know at times, I have been tough with you but that is only
to teach you the true core facts and hardships we must appreciate
in order to understand the importance of life. You must start to
trust yourself! I know trust is hard to do when all you see in life is
unjustified circumstances surrounding you. However you must
learn to trust your heart. Perfection’s love is the ultimate aim and
purpose in life – “Jesus Christ”- who do you think you are? Oh, I
know maybe you think - you are Jesus Christ.
My son, I only notice a lost young man in a place of silence. You
search for your inner strength and must know how to reach the
emotional level of your heart. Maybe I don’t have much in life as
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23. P a g e | 23
materialism is concerned, but spiritually I have everything - my
heart. But I am sure there are people like me who have the least
and give more, because they recognize the importance in life, that if
anything good results, it has to come from Perfection. Perfection
gives each of us a gift to use and that talent is to be discovered. We
must learn to use our gift. If Life is teaching us a lesson we must
learn to understand what these teachings are, for there is always a
solution to every situation as long as you believe in yourself and in
a higher being. Be positive always in gaining opportunity that Per-
fection gives us to reach our goals in life. Always think of a higher
being with your heart, mind and soul. Don’t let any negative emo-
tions come into your heart and soul for only then you can achieve
anything. Your soul must be cleansed and you mustn’t blame any-
one but yourself for your own actions. We need to learn one thing in
life – “ourselves and our relationships with our family and friends”.
And as I have told you many times in your life, the way to the
heart is - by knowing yourself. Take a look at who you are by re-
flecting upon your own heart and soul. Listen to yourself! But you
truly must start to forgive those that love you the most in your life.
My dear son, up to now in your life you have been spoon fed, and
given everything on a silver platter, well life must be balanced out,
and you have to learn what it means to want, to need, to hope, and
mostly to care. The fact that you are a very stubborn man with his
own way of seeing the world; it is of crucial importance to identify
your weaknesses and strengths. But also, be aware that I have noth-
ing to offer you in life but my heart for I have no other wealth and
times are real tough for me and your sister.
I know life is unfair, but nobody said it would be easy. The one
thing you must learn is to trust yourself, your heart and soul can
only be pure, if you know who you are and believe in yourself. Per-
fection will always be with you in your darkest hours, but you need
to trust, you must also stop the fear, anxiety and self-worthlessness.
You have to start to really understand how to live in the present
and not in the past; this is your biggest problem. You have to stop
thinking about what happened to you but you need to learn more
why you need to help yourself and then others. We all have a say in
life, sometimes we need to share our story, so we can help others
and that is how we can help ourselves.
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24. P a g e | 24
My son, you know I am trying to bring awareness to a world wom-
an project www.velvet-evolution.com because that is what a higher
being has planned for me. I know what it feels like to be hurt. But
you must always know that everything in life happens for a reason.
Your episode now in life is only temporary. Your life will change
but only if you want to change it, because you are the only one who
can do it. However, you must want it. I cannot change it for you no
matter where you will be.
If you are not happy with yourself, and do not respect, love or care
for yourself, then nothing and nobody will be able to make you hap-
py. Only you and you alone with Perfection can change who or
what you want in your life. If life was easy and if we never had to
live through hardships we wouldn’t know what it means to live. We
all appreciate what we have in our life, if we work hard for what
we want. And we must do it not just say it. If I want to change the
world, first I must change myself. I want to write a book, I must
discipline myself each day to do it. If I want to show I care about
you, I must teach you what I know from doing it to myself and most
important thing I want to say to you; we must never lie to ourselves
or those we love. We especially must not cheat and steal. Perfection
teaches us lessons every day, we must learn to understand, respect
what he is teaching us. If you trust yourself, then you will also trust
others. Life is life every day is beautiful, I know you might not think
so, but please remember it can’t do you any good to think about
negative thoughts only positive ones. We are doing everything pos-
sible to make sure, you will be okay. They didn’t tell us that they
took you out from the hospital and put you in front of the judge, I
only found out because I called the police station in Komarno.
I am sure you must really hate Slovakia right about now, but the
most important job for your lawyer is to get you out of jail and find
you the proper medical attention you need, remember, if I could I
would come to visit you. They didn’t allow me or your father to see
you. So, if you truly believe in yourself and a higher being then you
have nothing to fear in life and help yourself to understand in Slo-
vakia there is no law. You are presently living in nomads land,
with chaos, power, and ego. The faster you realize that you cannot
do what you want the better it will be for you.
In Slovakia the law is very different from Canada. My son, I love
you, I am including a return envelope for you to write back to me. I
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25. P a g e | 25
can visit you on the 13th at 8:00am in the morning. Just remember,
be strong. And you should know that Perfection is with you. And I
am with you. You have nothing to be afraid of, only yourself. Re-
member in life we have love and fear, to fail is called living, to fear
is to hate. Fear of failure of not coping with a situation of not being
able to relate to another person is at the heart of this fear of the dif-
ferent, the strange, and the stranger. It is as if we are walking in
unknown road of life. When you live a love of trust, you live with
your heart. So, when one loves with trust, one does not give things,
one gives oneself and so, the human lives through the heart loving
of perfection. My son, if you don’t trust yourself, then how you can
expect me to believe in you, and what you can do or become in life.
Your integrity in whom and what you can do is in your mind, and
in your own hands. I pray for you and send you blessings for stay-
ing sane in this mad world of ours. I send you my love. Please pray
with me, and write to me. And one final piece of advice is that if
you cannot trust yourself and your mother, than ask yourself, who
you can trust in this crazy world created by man.
Finally, Prayer is a time to let light flow in our lives, literally to
“enlighten” each day. To pray is to be centered in love; it is to let
what is deepest within us come to the surface. For me it was a way
to stay in touch with my son and much more. Prayer is also a meet-
ing with the one who loves me, who reveals to me my human value,
who empowers me to give life, who loves us all and who calls us
forth to greater love and compassion. Prayer is resting in the quiet,
caring presence to a higher force through the human heart that in a
place of freedom and trust. Prayer reflects your devotion to com-
municating with Perfection. It truly is the best way to show love to
and to your own heart. Trust is not easy to maintain in a relation-
ship with yourself and others. But to trust in Perfection do not al-
low any man to come between you and it for this is a gift. Trust in
your heart and soul that this is your life and you are the only one
you can create. We have hope each and every day that we succeed
in life. To have no hope is to have no life. It is your life, make it
happen. Trust in you.
“All I have seen teaches me to trust the creator for all I have not
seen”. Ralph Waldo Emerson
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“Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The im-
portant thing is not to stop questioning”. Albert Einstein
October 13th 2011
My dear son,
I pray that you
are doing ok. I
hope that my let-
ter will find to
your way, and
that I am now sending you my prayers and my heart. Please, keep
strong, chin up and most of all do as they tell you or life can be
more of hell than heaven. Your heart and mind is yours and I know
with my prayers, there is hope. I love you, and remember, love is
the conqueror of all obstacles in life’s daily episodes whether they
are big or small. There is no other way than we humans to com-
municate in a positive state of mind. I am writing to you in hope of
finding your feelings in your heart. To begin, we are all planned or
destined to be here on earth with a purposeful meaning to create
our life. I make comments and remarks such as “I am not from this
planet” that is for the reason I think with my heartbeat. I truly do
try to love my life through listening to my heart.
We all need to be influenced for some direction to our lives destiny.
If we only take the time and knowledge from a one way frame of
mind, we end up with dictatorship, egoism, and imprisonment. To
be able to understand key words such as harmony, balance, justice,
freedom, human rights, requires not only intelligence to educate
yourself but you must surely have a heart and soul. To have a true
heart, a human being, with an over emotional mechanism of a
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27. P a g e | 27
characteristic is how you can be related. You are sensitive, caring
and loving young man. You need to be reminded or refreshed upon
the definitions of “Respect”, “Discipline”, and “Self-Control”. It
seems that the basic foundations of nature’s lessons of life’s Survivor
skills course is underestimated. We all have the choices and chances
to achieve greatness. But to implement the creations take time, pa-
tience, light heartedness and care. We can continue our lives and
head down the road that matters the most. And to some this means
work through the greatness of Truth or we can take life’s short-cuts
of cheating, lying, stealing, etc. Needless to say if we choose to live
with a heart, then we must focus on following signs of hope in our
heart! I understand the loss of hope and how life can be a miscom-
munication of channels but it is difficult to climb the steps in life
when we have no hope and a healing heart to mend. I believe we
all can do anything we truly desire but we really must want to do
it. To be able to reach discipline, self-control and integrity, it re-
quires caring and respecting ourselves, our family and our envi-
ronment, in our communities.
To have the strength to learn about life requires “hope and intelli-
gence” to understand how to acquire a pure heart. It is not enough
to attend “Institutions” but it requires living through truth. Every
day of a human’s life can be called a daily episode or journal of life.
To analyze all the details and dialogues does take time to dissect
each thought. My son, you need to be willing to take certain
thoughts into your heart. You have a young, strong, open heart and
to express what you feel and not be judged must be knowledge of
“Emotional Intelligence”. The best way is to understand the human
mind. To realize that with the assistance of your heart is the only
way the mind functions. If the heart is not communicating with the
mind, then we have turbulence in our heart and soul. And we are
off balance from the course or path of life. Here is where chaos and
insanity come into the play in the game of life. Focusing ourselves
requires honesty and trust that we develop to survive in this crazy
world through hope. But to say one only is to believe in oneself is a
question for the human heart. Isn’t true that people who have had
no recent talks with perfection have more turbulence, and havoc in
their lives? To live our life for ourselves is misleading to life’s exist-
ence. Humans throughout history have always had faith in a high-
er Universal being and I call it Perfection. Whether, this higher be-
ing is God or not has been debated for centuries as thought in ques-
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28. P a g e | 28
tion of life. It must be felt in the heart and be fully aware that Per-
fection is everywhere. To question God is a human’s intelligence in
the thinking process of the Universal cosmic force in Energy’s mat-
ter. And if we need to learn one part of our life, it is that the body is
where we should invest our time and money. But it is not just the
body, for the mind also needs to be exercised on a daily basis.
The more of life we live, if we can acknowledge and see the thinkers
who have expressed themselves in work. Even musical writers for
lyrics write down their feelings and have vocal performers act upon
their words to express their feelings of emotional experiences. To
feel that you are alone on earth is not a pleasant thought. If you
take a moment and think to yourself yes, I was born alone and now
I must learn to understand myself, so that I can understand others
who will be related to me in my life is not so. To fall in love is easy
but to build relationships is not an easy task. The hardest thing in
life is to maintain and up keep human relationships is Perfection’s
test of man. We all need emotional support and minimize long term
damage to a child’s mental health after a breakup such as divorce.
To gain insightful knowledge about which one is to himself is also a
very difficult challenge and achievement no matter how hard we
try to communicate and act upon the presence of relationship sta-
tus depends on the individual. To deny yourself the choice or choices
to understand who you are would be a disobedience to life’s course.
We all need and want the same energetic matter in our life. “Love”-
love however, to my belief and research is that must be learnt pro-
cess of living the process of love. And in order to learn it one must
experience love in all forms. Humans today that are not cared for
or unloved turn into or behave as animals locked up in a cage with
the key thrown away. Let’s make a scene where a young man just
graduating from middle school and knows life only from institu-
tions, family and books.
In actual fact and in real life drama he has no idea, how cruel and
unjust the world can be. He has been protected all his life from “re-
ality”. To live in a bubble of life’s reality, creates chaos in the hu-
man’s mind. You must learn to love everything and everyone in
your present environment. If you will believe in your own reality
and seek the truth about yourself and care enough to love yourself
then life becomes a destined discovery of who you are. To evolve in-
to a human being means to have hope on how to become human.
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29. P a g e | 29
Just as man learns to love, he also must learn to become a human
being with feelings. To learn how to “become human” just as man
seems to love, he also learns to be a human being, so he learns to feel
as a human being - to love as a human being. It has been researched
that psychiatrists, sociologists and educators advised and suggested
in numerous case studies that love is a “learned response, a learned
emotion” how someone learns to love seems to be directly related to
his ability to learn from those who are in his surroundings and
teaching him.
However, society plays a major role and takes part of everyday
acts, scenes and episodes to create characters in the role of life. But
to accept all that is given to us is a huge choice for everyone not on-
ly to the confused or unloved or even you. You are special but must
learn that we are all different and each person has his/her role to
play in life. We must change by following our heart and that our
pure soul will be cleansed from past thoughts. It is what does not kill
our soul can only make our heart stronger to survive life. Our pres-
ence to life’s progression of a human being is to never forget that
nobody will believe in us, unless we believe in ourselves. To learn
the key features one must first never give up on oneself. In life there
is no other person physically or spiritually like you. So now, is to on-
ly say that each day you are getting stronger in the physical sense,
however you must become whole on the spiritual and mental ways
and means also. As a human being you also should have the
knowledge of the word, “obedience” the reason I mention the above
word is for you to understand “The Mind”.
To have an obedient life is to know how to control the mind. It is the
greatest challenge to oneself. So often the body, seeks to control the
mind, and quite often succeeds. If you had sufficient amount of rest
that your body needs daily, it compares to a dosage of a drug for
the chemicals in the brain to react in harmony and sync. It is here
when the brain can naturally with the body re-energize or re-
activates the mind into proper channels of emotional functioning
mechanisms. As for everyday living we have understood that the
body and the mind together don’t have to do anything to control the
soul for the soul is completely without need - (unlike the body and
mind which are connected) and so it allows the body and the mind
to have their way all the time. Indeed, the soul wouldn’t have it any
other way, for if the being is you and you are to create, and who al-
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lows to know who it really is, it must be through an act of uncon-
scious willing, and not the act of unconscious.
Obedience is not creation, and thus can never produce salvation.
Obedience is a response, while creation is a pure choice that cannot
be dictated. Pure choice produces salvation through the pure crea-
tion of the highest idea of the moment of now. Here is 4 C-s to aim
for in life. They are as follows: choice, chance, change and care. You
must make the choice, to take the chance, if you want anything in
life to change through care. The function of the mind is to choose
from its alternatives. The function of the body is to act out that
choice. When your body, mind and soul create together, in harmony
and in unity God is made present. The soul might know it’s-self in its
own experience.
Right now, in this moment, your soul has again created opportunity
for you to be, doing, and have what it really takes to know who you
really are. Here is your chance to have hope and believe you’re in
the hands of God. Your soul has brought you to the words of wisdom
and truth to yourself. Ask yourself, how will you become a better
human being to understand who you are? Whom will you choose to
be? Your soul waits behind the walls of prison. You are your own
prisoner. Here you must decide what and where you want to go in
your life. You can have anything you want; you simply must want
to have it. Or you simply must want to give yourself the chance to
want it. Life is no guarantee; all we can do is keep trying to be a
better human being. We can only truly become better than our-
selves. Ask yourself who do you think you are, and do you know
who you really are? Now to wrap or sum it all up, my son life is one
of ups and downs but we must learn as adults to manage them. For
example: As a child one can scream, yell, and have temper tan-
trums like in the phase of the terrible two’s and was always able to
get away with mischief. Society has given this kind of behavior a
label “the terrible 2’s” to make the understanding of the child’s be-
havior in life‘s experience. Yet this cycle if it is tampered with at
the age of 21 and acts out the actions of the 2 year old, society has
labeled the adult with a personality disorder. Maybe, this is the root
of man’s irony or paradox. Let’s just say life is full of bullshit and
we need to express our hearts or simply be understood. To be differ-
ent is to be unique, to be unique is to be different. To be free with
human rights is a learnt process of living, learning, laughing and
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31. P a g e | 31
most of all loving. It is this love that is needed to a human’s well-
ness in spirit, not just body and mind. Remember, I love you and I
was so happy to see you today, that I could not stop writing; I am
going to include your lawyer’s phone number. You know her name
and I will request her to visit you. And you must also, ask for a vis-
itation form in order for me to visit you, hopefully you will not be
in there for very long period of time. And send me the form request
for sending you a toothbrush, toothpaste etc... I am going to send
you a book photocopied called “Conversations with God”! I hope you
know in my heart that I always do what I feel is best for you and
now I am asking you to put your faith in a higher being and your
hands to educate your mind, write, write, write and mostly try to
write from your heart to have hope to gain strength each day. I
love you, Be Strong! I pray for you.
Here is an activity that I suggest you participate yourself in creat-
ing a Sense of Self; Hope. Write about something uplifting. Your soul
doesn’t want to hear about anything negative. Emily Dickenson
said of hope that it “…is the thing with feathers that perches in the
soul, and sings the tune without the words and never stops at all.” It
is the tune without the words: hope is not about specifics–if it were
it could be dashed when the words turn out to be false prophesies. It
claims in the soul because the mind is often so traumatized by pre-
sent and past events that there is no other place for it. It is almost
unknown in primitive societies and the ancient Hebraic writings
speak little of suicide and approach reality in vastly different
terms: Perfection is an involved parent, caring for his children. In
Perfection there is always hope. Modern psychologist’s today state
that hopelessness is learned and that hope is our birthright. Our so-
ciety teaches hopelessness, consumerism depends on it; misguided
parents instill it in their offspring through neglect, abuse or criti-
cism. Much of our media spreads ideas that hope is a waste of time
and instills upon the pharmaceutical industry. And yet even in the
most depressed or traumatized modern patient, even, perhaps, in a
person contemplating suicide, hope never leaves. Even if it’s only
the hope of being free of pain. Hope is not the same as the will to
live–it’s not another word for our survival instinct, though it may
contribute to it. Since the early 1990s the world has known a lot
about the neurobiology of hope, but very little about the psychology
of it. I think, in the end hope is a spiritual experience. We feel hope
in spiritual situations and in spiritual states: in nature, in prayer,
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in music, in art, in deep meditation and in just being with people
that we love.
I get a craving of hope when I watch you smile at others in quite
different colors, or when a child is born to be adorned and cared for
in life. I get something of the same feeling when I look at you, my
son and realize how much love I have for you. It is that feeling of
the Higher Power that keeps hope alive and strong in my soul no
matter what setbacks I face every day in my life, as in yours. A
mother is a child’s best doctor and knows what is best for his or her
child. Hope is medicine.
Physicians know that hope heals. Diseases that would otherwise be
critical can be cured through the stimulation of hope in their pa-
tients. Researchers have shown that there is a kind of hope system,
rather like the immune system but biologically quite different from
it. The two seem to work in conjunction to the healing process and
not all the drugs in the pharmacological industry will do much good
if the hope/immune system is not functioning properly. What I be-
lieve severely depressed clients want of any doctor is hope. Hope
that the disease will vanish, that there is a point to living or that
their lives will simply get a little better. In the end that is a moth-
er’s job, to become a true aid and friend of the hope system, to in-
troduce them to techniques that will empower their own soul’s re-
sponse to pain and thus to heal them. And they do heal, and the
pain and the hopelessness do fade away. Hope never leaves, it’s in
our genes. What we have to do is unlearn hopelessness by putting
ourselves in situations–spiritual in the highest sense of the word–
that allows our genetics to override our identity. I hope you care
enough for yourself to save your soul. It is my only way of saying to
have hope is to have care. And if you care for yourself then there is
always room for hope.
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“Things done well and with a care, exempt themselves from fear”.
William Shakespeare
October 21st, 2011
Dear son,
I hope you’re well and
that they are treating you
with some dignity and hu-
mane conditions. I remem-
ber when you were in Can-
ada. The time I had to live
through was pure hell, but I
know that God was with
you then too. It was one of
the hardest times in my life
to live through without un-
derstanding it. My son to be
able to care for yourself you
must free yourself in your own mind. Learn to care to forgive and
seek your own freedom of mind.” Forgive”. To be able to love,
change and care to become well, one needs freedom to the discovery
of oneself. You have got to be free in your mind, in order to learn,
what it is care for yourself. We need to be free to create. Everyone
has his own way to express himself, but must be allowed the free-
dom to pursue it. Just so you know that I care for you. (Ikar4u)
Everyone including you will find his own way, if you listen and fol-
low your heart. In today’s world it is very difficult to remain true
to yourself - media, social websites, and movies, control influence
and manipulate what we should say and do. Don’t allow anybody
to impose, influence, or control your mind. As a prisoner, one can be
locked up physically but in our minds and souls you are the only
human being that can keep you a prisoner within yourself. The
hardest thing in the world is to be something or someone you’re not!
If you know who you are, and that you are special and unique, and
there is no other person like you in the world, that alone is enough
power to say you can be anyone or do anything. And that nothing
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is impossible but in fact anything is possible within a human being’s
mortal capacity. You are a young, strong, but mostly sensitive man
and your weakness is your strength. Now you must rule yourself.
How can man overcome one’s own transparency to himself? Is man
really capable to fathom “The truth”? Who we become in life solely
depends on our wants and needs. Do I want to be a millionaire, or
do I want to be a monk? This depends on the human beings emo-
tional intelligence at different stages in his or her life. Even a child
understands what it is that it wants or needs. A child needs and
wants to be loved. At a very early age we become emotionally
aware of our basic foundation of life’s needs.
It is our humanistic need as human beings to be cared for at all
stages in our life. So, to simply say we need to be loved and cared
for as a child, also applies to adulthood. To eliminate a natural drug
of life from one’s emotions is no mistake. Why ones sanity can di-
minish into thin air? To walk on thin ice is also very risky and un-
necessary to jeopardize the wellness of beings. Our focus and re-
sponsibility as adults must guide clearance in the higher learning
education of society. We must take notice of our surroundings and
speak out if we see matters differently than others. It is our human
right to be able to question or challenge the emotional intelligence
“I’m still holding onto something that I know will never happen, be-
cause inside me, I have this little piece of hope that someday, it
will”. We can take the comparison between good vs. evil if now our
body is not feeling good that affects our two hemispheres, of the
brain left and right, connected by the corpus coliseum its where the
two hemispheres are joined. Either the right or left side will be off
balance, but in actual fact ask yourself why are you ill in the first
place? Perfection’s word says that our disobedience to his word
starts the disease process in our body. And all disobedience starts as
a thought in our heart. When you have a sinful thought, you have
the choice to delete or store the information in your computer that
is called the brain. Holding onto sinful thoughts or continually stor-
ing those producing a toxic state within your brain and body. Your
brain produces chemical messengers in response to every thought
you think. If your thoughts are good/positive - then your brain will
produce chemical messengers that will strengthen your immune
system and increase overall well-being. If your thoughts are cruel
and toxic, your brain produces chemical reactivations which are
harmful to your whole body and your immune system will become
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35. P a g e | 35
weaker and your overall health will diminish. In the universe there
are laws that govern things and people. Law of physics governs
matter. How it behaves through time and space. For example: on
earth we have the law of gravity; also, we have civil laws in every
country and government. And most importantly there are spiritual
laws set in place by god our creator.
The most natural law of Perfection is “you reap what you sow” we
can sow (“grow to plant seeds in the ground”) things in 3 ways
through our actions through our words and through what we think.
But the origins of all words and actions are the thoughts in our
heart. If someone hurts you, it is your first defense will be in your
heart. You can think: I can forgive them or you may think I’m of-
fended, therefore you might become revengeful. One thought will
bring bliss and wellness to you, and the other thought will bring un-
pleasant feelings and disease, from anger, fear or hate. Perfection
can make us to always forgive. But Perfection has given us free will
and he wants us to do the right thing by forgiving, by making it our
own choice to obey him willingly. People often do not notice that
when one does not obey what Perfection’s words teaches, they not
only sin against it, but one causes damage to one’s mental and state
of well-being physically, spiritually too. One should try to move to-
wards being aware and willing to learn the Ten Guidelines to
Life. You will find these guidelines at the end of the next letters in
chapter Belief. Always forgive people for our own benefit and well-
being. For it is only when we have a healthy concept of who we are
in the eyes of our creator can we reach out to those around us in
love and show forgiveness. Learning to forgive ourselves is one of
our greatest challenges. It can be difficult to face the fact that we
are guilty as human beings, for simply becoming human. I am cer-
tain you must feel that in today’s society, to be a human alone is a
crime.
I hope you can understand that children like yourself battling fear,
divorce and humiliation for many years, their perception of them-
selves drastically changes by the loss of either parent and the void
of communication on a daily basis. I know you are struggling to
find your own way to cope with life’s altering shocks you have ex-
perienced. You are extremely sensitive to the forces of the universe,
you must learn to adapt to every situation that you are given and
grasp the lesson. I know in fact you are a survivor by Perfection’s
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motherly nature. Your guidance to survival skills can be greatly
improved upon with God. It is by no surprise that I being your
mother understand, and accept you, for being simply yourself. I am
sure you are asking yourself, how long does the emotional pain of
trauma last? In your case my son, it has been five years out of your
life. You still have not allowed your soul to heal and accept the di-
vorce of your parents. Do you think you can allow yourself the
chance to care to let go of the past and move into the present? But if
you keep on caring to have a better future, you must stop blaming
others and focus on your situation.
Human beings in general are more critical and hard upon them-
selves. To dwell on our negative aspects as characteristics of being
human is norm. But to focus on the weak and not develop the
strength is failure of forgiveness. To refuse to accept forgiveness for
us and others may in fact lead to physical and emotional health
problems. It has been researched and known those experiencing the
death of a loved one, divorced or loss of a job are at a higher risk of
depression or cause cancer risk, heart-attack and so on. Therefore,
in such trying confrontations in life there can be much anger, re-
sentment and revengeful thoughts. It has taken me most of my life
to realize that to blame someone for not understanding their ac-
tions or personal life experiences is not righteous. So, blaming my
own mother for the horrible childhood she has caused in my life is
the wrong approach for my own body, mind and soul.
One must learn to understand himself in order to learn to compre-
hend other people’s lives that affect our life and in turn even our
world. Let there be no mistake illnesses that arise from emotional
difficulties that are just as real and as serious as any other disease.
We must not underestimate the power of our emotions that affect
our bodies. Do not let hurt and fear of their destructive effects upon
your life. Fear is yet another trait of self destruction. To be true to
ourselves is to be careful and carefree, not fearful with doubts of
life’s challenges. If we are afraid to step out of our comfort zone or
set foot on a plane, it is because of the “No control syndrome”. Truly
you have to not only control it with your thoughts; therefore, we
can always be in control of our mind with positive affirmations and
manifestations. I must repeat this to you, even in the most fearful
situation we can care to remain calm and in control of our
thoughts. The other word I would like to care and recall is for-
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giveness. This means to have the key tool for inner healing and
happiness. In this world, we may never know why we are permitted
to suffer the wrongs we do, why Perfection does not prevent them
from happening. Why instead of being granted answers, we are told
to – Trust in God?
Maybe, it is because the tapestry of the divine plan is too infinitely
complex beyond our comprehension. We question many aspects re-
garding Perfection, but how many of us should be more concerned
about trusting and caring for ourselves. To follow your heart is be-
ing content with - who you are! We all learn from our mistakes in
life, therefore we have to forgive ourselves for what happened in
the past. We must learn not to be so hard on ourselves, and accept
our mistakes as a learning experience. In order for all our feelings
toward ourselves is to be positive as to how we feel about ourselves.
All our thoughts that we might have had and looked upon ourselves
in a negative way, such as holding grudges, anger, or even resent-
ment towards ourselves is a feeling we must eliminate completely
from our mind. In order to start your life from a clean slate or bet-
ter phrased on a blank canvas, you must learn to free yourself from
hurtful or painful thoughts. This step is necessary in order for you
to accept your uniqueness in the presence of your world. To start to
bring in care through forgiveness in your heart means becoming
aware of forgetting your past, and leaving it once and for all in the
past. Then and only then you will you be able to fully live in the
present state of mind. Becoming to be and being aware of your pre-
sent feelings towards yourself to forgive your own mistakes and
erase your own guilt. We also need to learn how to stay neutral or
anger free from our own fears. Here are some 8 easy to use Tips to
caring for your emotional state of mind.
8 Tips on CARING for Yourself:
Learn to;
1. Turn off your brain – rest in peaceful nightly positions
2. Check your body- exercise your internal mechanisms
3. Read and Write – keep journaling, for it activates the daily us-
age of your mind
4. Draw a canvas- keep visualizations and mental notes in your
brain
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5. Exercise -the brain and body calls for daily physical activities
6. Recognize - nature’s elements and re-connect
7. Show true care- express your appreciation through words and
actions, put yourself back in touch with perhaps the most pow-
erful force or tool you have: the Human Heart of care
8. Spirituality - in a human is our soul, and the spiritual part of a
person that most religions believe continues to exist after the
body dies.
So, towards Life’s goals one must try to recognize the above 8 Tips
on Caring for yourself as using those more like tools to begin to fur-
ther understand our emotional intelligence in caring for ourselves.
1. To recognize how to be able to shut off our brain and have a rest-
ful and peaceful sleep requires a pure clean soul of a human being.
The calmness at night keeps kinds of daily emotions presented that
day. We tend to analyze the happenings and further predictions on
the matter. We must accept each day of thankfulness and grow in
body, mind and spirit.
2. To re-evaluate our physical condition is to scan all working mus-
cles and organs to our well being. Just as we get our cars going
through safety checks we need to have our bodies in the same scan-
ning system. It is for the functioning of all our muscles, joints, and
organs to rotate in harmony and in sync.
3. To rewrite and keep the mind open to wordy expressions is thera-
peutic to keep or mind active. Many times to see our words in print,
allows us to re-visualize our thoughts. We learn to grow from our
words and work our mind in an emotional state.
4. Allow yourself a blank canvas, visualize what you want to
achieve in your life. Keep adding to the canvas, like an unfinished
painting - life is always exciting if we are on the road of discovery.
To continually paint our lives with color and different textures of
paint is exciting to all our senses. To create your own painting with
various hues and shades is a discovery to the outcome of perception.
But to limit yourself to your own creativity and imagination would
be to imprison your own mind. And that would be a criminal act of
self destruction.
5. Daily physical mind and body movement is essential to a hu-
man’s well being. To effectively be disciplined in physical movement
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requires an obedient mind. If we have a restful night and re-
energize we can progress in a clean and refreshed morning regime
activity. If we actually enjoy the rewards from our exercise we are
motivated to further our actions.
6. Reconnected with our Natural elements is relevant to all our in-
ternal and external features. Our body benefits both aspects and
visualizes outwards on our largest organ “Skin” if you live in stress
this can be seen in adults in a forms of acne. Our illness is manifest-
ing from internal organs and working its way through our largest
living organ our skin. To eliminate all negative energetic elements
requires understanding nature. We are what we think, act or say.
7. Here is a humanistic approach to the human heart in one word
“care” (IKAR4u) It is here we can use volunteerism, and fundrais-
ing as characteristics of caring. To help needy individuals is a nat-
ural reaction to human emotions. To act upon helping the less for-
tunate, is a human natural behavior that has been learnt. To care is
to show emotional intelligence. To be able to feel the energetic raves
from acting upon following one’s heart, is a blessing. So many people
follow the brain waves and not the heart beats, that they keep skip-
ping life’s notes. Note: In Bipolar cases the care must be dealt with
caution, because of being in an excessively good mood, later can be
taken advantage and abused in excessive spending spree.
8. To see your spirit on the other side of the wall, it says” something
to think about” Mirror, mirror on the wall, how do I look today to
myself and others? A mirror is only a reflection of my outward ap-
pearance. It does not read my mind, and show me what I am think-
ing, speaking, or my degree of intelligence, my real physical condi-
tion, or my talents. It also never shows the condition of my soul. I
really am the only one who knows the degree of my moral behavior
and the habits in everyday living that reflect in and on my soul. A
reflection of oneself in a mirror constantly would become tiring to
see, because my image would become my focal point of attention -
vanity that would destroy possibly inward goodness. But also, you
must realize a constant, consistent attention to seeing oneself every
moment in the day - that would cause a mental block to reality.
What if a mirror could show me a reflection of my soul- hourly- dai-
ly- weekly- monthly- yearly? What would it look like at the end of
the year? If it is shadowed, shaded, the soul would appear shattered,
if it is bright yet has dull areas, the soul would appear sad. It is
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bright with hope, and care, the soul will appear happy, and even
radiant. To look into one’s soul is to look in a mirror or crystal ball.
Be true to who you are and so not allow vanity, egoism, and perfec-
tionism to take the upper lip. A reflection of who we are can be a
traumatic adjustment. Humans strive to be perfect, nevertheless,
only it being Perfection or a Higher Being is perfect. We do try for
Perfectionism in our daily living, such as nurturing, studying, play-
ing, but to reach to be perfect is impossible for a human. The reason
- we are all born with sin that we must learn to accept and cleanse.
Our spirituality is the essence of what keeps us alive, care for your-
self by showing it through your actions on a daily basis. We mor-
tals, make human mistakes, we learn to reflect through our past
life’s experiences.
Is it lack of believing in the Ten Guidelines of Life, that you will
learn in my next written letter as the lack of self - esteem, and habit
of pleasing others above all costs and ignoring Perfection at any
cost to one’s soul? There is so little understanding of true existence
of one’s soul and its close association with it. If this were not a fact
than why would Perfection have given us the only son Jesus Christ
to suffer for the sins of man? And do you know why man does sin in
his or her lifetime. The answer could be that we are only human be-
ings striving to be in God’s perfectionism. However to error in life is
to be human. Our eyes are the windows to our heart and soul. This
naturally is our Spirit. And not caring about your own heart or
soul, well, my dear son this would be a crime inflicted upon your-
self, therefore, care for your most precious commodity in life - your
heart. And if you can care for yourself, then I believe you can do
anything. I feel that you are the only being in this lifetime that can
honestly know himself and believe to care about himself. If you
cannot give to yourself, then I am asking you who can. I believe in
you. Do you believe in yourself? Stay well, for I hope to see you
soon, mom.
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41. P a g e | 41
“Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man”. Thomas Paine
October 28. 2011
My only son,
I would
like you to be-
lieve me and
know simply
that I have been
praying for you,
and most of all you must believe me that I love you and will
come to visit you very soon. I am still waiting for the form from
the prison. I wonder if you know that Love is to have belief in
whom you are and why you exist. God has given all of us even
you my son a purpose in life, and it is for you to believe that you
will find that road and follow it with your heart. To have belief
in you is to know Perfection.
Allow yourself a blank canvas and visualize what you want to
achieve in your life. Keep adding to the canvas like an unfin-
ished painting. Life is always in waiting if we are on the world
of discovery. To continually paint our lives with color and dif-
ferent texture of paint is exciting. To create your own painting
experiment with life means that you are allowing life to color
your world. Shading and living in your own shadows would be
to limit yourself to your own creativity and imagination. But
most of all it would be to imprison your mind. Daily physical
mind and body movement is essential to a human’s well-being to
continually be disciplined in physical movement requires an
obedient mind. If we have a rest for a night and are re-
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42. P a g e | 42
energized, we can progress in a clean and refreshed fashion. If
we actually enjoy the new aids from one’s experience, we are
motivated to further our actions. To re-construct with our nat-
ural elements is intelligent to all our internal and external hu-
manly features. Our body benefits both aspects and resurges
outwards as a result of our largest organ “skin” if you live in
stress this can be seen in adults in a form of an acne. Our illness
is manifesting from internal organs and working its way
through our largest living organ. Our own skin to eliminate all
negative energetic elements requires understanding nature. To
the human heart in one word “care” it is how we can use inter-
action. And fundraiser as characteristics of caring. To help
needy individuals is a natural reaction to human emotions to
act upon helping the less fortunate is a human natural behavior
that has been learnt, so to care is to show human natural emo-
tional intelligence. Humans tend to be aware of the energetic
waves from acting upon and following ones heart is a blessing,
but so many people follow the brain waves and not the heart
beats, that they keep skipping life’s notes on the other wall it
says “something to think about” mirror, mirror on the wall how
do I look today to others?
Do you remember in my last letter or previous chapter, I had
stated “you reap what you sow”! If you are seeking to plant that
seed, the seed holds life‘s creation and its essence an awareness
of its own particle. It seeks the ideal growing conditions for its
evolution to a phase of flowering and fruitful maturity. By
turning into your awareness of your particle and what elements
are supportive of your growth, you can also target what it is
that you work to cultivate in your life seeding your creative
projects that you can find. Allow them to flourish by nourishing
them. Show you believe. Honor the sacred garden as yourself.
Remember that in the seed is the holographic pattern for the
whole harvest. No matter how small you are, you have the seed
to fulfill your highest potential within you. Aim your goals care-
fully; take actions that foster growth and you will bloom. Your
result can be an affirmation that your aware-ness flourishes to
the seeds of life creations It may also be re-stated that if you
choose to forgive, rather than allowing yourself to build up neg-
ative thoughts with bad intentions, stealing, lying, cheating, etc.
your brain will respond by relapsing disease producing chemi-
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cals throughout your body. And our physical appearance starts
to be evident for others to notice as their Illnesses like form in
the body. If we sow these dirty thoughts we will reap illness to
ourselves, for whatever a man sowed that shall he al-so reap”
Corinthians 6:7 so, now you are asking me, what are these laws
of the harvest?
You reap what you sow.
You reap more than you sow.
You reap where you sow.
You reap in different seas than you sow.
For example: when a farmer plants one carrot seed, he will get
what he planted. He will get more than one carrot if planted
more than one seed and he will harvest at a later date not the
day he planted. Now depending to when you plant toxic or poi-
son thought in your body, you will reap its toxic effects in your
body. You will reap to get something as a result of something
else that you do. An illness which is greater in developing than
the one bad thought you allowed to be planted. And you will
reap this illness months or years down the road. I recall not
forgiving my own mother for years, and realized how much de-
pression I had inflicted upon myself. It is a good thing for reap-
ing to happen down the journey of life but not immediately, be-
cause it gives us time and opportunity to repent to god to stop
our harmful thoughts and start to obey god than the illness stops
our grieving and will start to reverse itself. You can regain your
health by starting with your thoughts by choosing only to dwell
on thoughts that are in sync with truth and teachings of emo-
tional intelligence. They say that people can’t change, but this is
not true. This is a lie from the enemy. “They” are wrong!
People can change! This can happen through self-imposed care
and others with god’s strength. Your thoughts develop into atti-
tudes, your attitude develops into behavior, your behavior is
then part of your personality – who you are but if there are un-
desirable character gratuities in your personality, you are not
able to change. To be the change, you must have the knowledge
of absorbing intelligence. It is not enough to teach ourselves
emotional intelligence, but we shall go further to discover life’s
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multiple intelligence as maybe here you can explore and study
spiritually, which is crucial to understand and be aware of the
“human soul”. Just as in a confined space where man is caged in
as animals. One can only truly hope, pray and most of all have
patience within the heart. It can be said here man is his own
prisoner. Even if you don’t like yourself, you must learn to live
with yourself. Many people in the world are running from
themselves and can’t face or look into the mirror. To seek the
truth takes a strong character with will power to accept his or
her faults. We are humans that make natural and honest mis-
takes that could be carelessness or either way you look at it, you
should accept it and learn from it.
Or teach others to learn from it, and progress further into what
was created from the mistake. Our thoughts have great power -
they can bring us either Health – Peace or Illness - War. We are
in daily action on the battlefields and this battle takes place in
our minds. Perfection has prepared us for the game of tug-and-
war to remain sane in our crazy chaotic world. He has given us
protective armor, “Our heart” also the one tool to help us
through battles in our lives. Love. I give you a daily exercise to
repeat the following words 5 times’ each day for your heart.
“I believe in you”
“Someone somewhere is teaching
Praying to grasp that tool
someone stands to speak out
learning how to live
some of us can’t lead forward
we are sacred to leap
and everyone is watching
because we all need to feel I believe in you
I can’t even imagine the possibilities I believe in you
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And I just want to give you hope
So you can believe in you
I will never give up on you
I will be the voice that is beside you
I believe in you,” love mom.
My words are to empower and enrich your life; I know that
each day for you now is truly a living struggle to simply survive
the hurdles and obstacles you keep facing. That is why I men-
tioned in my last letter I will give you tools you can use to guide
you on your journey in life. These words can give each day a
new meaning and purpose. This is your mission;
TEN guidelines to Life
1. I want to change myself and promise that I will, so that I can be the change for a
better world.
2. I wish to be honest, trustworthy, and caring every day of my life. It is how I in-
tend it to be for the rest of my life.
3. I want to be able to do as much as possible in life with responsibility, discipline
and commitment with my family and friends.
4. I want to be strong: I want to be me and live to be free.
5. I wish for people to believe in me like I believe in myself.
6. I want to feel happy with myself and then have others feel the happiness with
me through my heart and soul.
7. I want to be loved and respected within my heart and I will not give up on my
soul to be able to care for myself, as others.
8. I will have trust- hope- care- belief-and love for who I am today, tomorrow and
for always.
9. I will love myself, so I can love others for I have a beautiful life and challenge
myself to be the best I can be.
10. I love me, but greatly live to say: “Ikar4u”.
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If you can strive to live each day with the above words as a guide
for you, then I believe you can achieve anything your heart desires.
We are all given the same tools, our mind, body and soul. How we
aim to achieve and maintain these tools to function in our daily
lives is only up to us. Each and every human has the capacity to live
by the ten guidelines to life. How many times have you tried to find
someone that will understand your heart and mind? Now let us ex-
amine the above sentences. First let us focus on the first set of words
I want to change myself and promise that I will, so that I can be the
change for a better world. These words seem easy enough to grasp.
However, to actually do it is another story. To be able to change
ourselves takes a great amount of energy, patience and time. We
must comprehend how to achieve such a task in life. The key to
transforming you is to want to be able to invest in your greatest as-
sets in your life. You need to have the want and need to first of all
want to do it. It is your first initiative in life to yourself. I want to
change me, must come from within you. Only once this is achieved
can you further go on in life to make your world a better place. You
must be the change first. And show others the way to the future.
The second point: I wish to be honest, trustworthy, and caring every
day of my life. It is how I intend it to be for the rest of my life. This
is a godly character of a human. If you can strive to pursue your
life in such words of integrity, and maintain to keep such qualities
in your heart, you will actually prevent yourself from illnesses.
Here you have the exact natural ingredient to preserving your life.
I need not tell you that the more negative qualities you bring upon
yourself, what it can do to you, and how depressed and unsuccessful
you can become. Therefore, to focus on these 3 words as honesty, be-
ing trustworthy, and above all caring, you bring upon positive
characteristics within yourself.
Your third guideline in life; I want to be able to do as much as pos-
sible in life with responsibility, discipline and commitment with my
family and friends. You only have one life, so how you spend your
time and with who depends solely on how you use the allocated time
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47. P a g e | 47
you have on earth. If you choose to become independent or have
others depend on you, then you have to be able to learn the attitude
or traits on being responsible in your personal and business life.
And to maintain any kind of order in either relationship, you have
to stay grounded. It is your discipline of keeping things in a fash-
ionable sanely manner with true acceptance to the outcome of any
situation. To take full commitment to yourself in accomplishing
such tasks requires an oath or a pledge to complete your assign-
ment. Needless to say all what you give to someone is what you can
expect in return from them to give back to you.
The fourth point: I want to be strong: I want to be me and live to be
free. The above sentence has a real strong group of words. To want
something is to be determined. To follow through in life with accept-
ing who you are and working on yourself daily requires a need and
want out of life. We all need to be loved, but in order to be strong
we need to know that we are loved and accepted for being who we
are. Each and every human alive wants to live in complete free-
dom. However, due to society’s slavery and security, law and order
are placed on humans. Your own freedom is your choice on how you
wish to react and act upon society’s rules and regulations. In every
country there are laws placed upon the mass, so humans have less
freedom. But in order to remain and stay free in the world, the
heart is all that matters. Keep your heart alive and well to live
strong and to be free.
The fifth guideline in life; I wish for people to believe in me like I be-
lieve in myself. To be able to wish upon a thought and make it hap-
pen can only evolve from you. You are the creator, you are the
master planner. What you think and what you do is what will be. If
you wish to become a millionaire, it will happen, only if you make it
happen. But if you continue to wish upon a star and wait for some-
one to make the million dollars for you, then your wish will never
come true. Everyone has the potential in themselves to become a
millionaire, but it is within your heart’s desire to make the dream
possible. You must believe that if you want it you can have it. What
you think and do is what you become in life. To believe in yourself,
is the greatest gift of all to achieve what life has to offer you.
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