This document provides guidance for leaders on protecting the mental, emotional and spiritual well-being of people during the COVID-19 pandemic. It discusses how emotions and moods can be "infectious", and the responsibility of leaders to minimize negative emotional contagion and maximize positive emotional infection. It offers practical suggestions for leaders such as recognizing who gives them energy versus anxiety, managing interactions accordingly, and communicating supportively. The document emphasizes the importance of physical exercise, meditation, prayer, gratitude, kindness and finding meaning/purpose during these difficult times. It advises leaders to acknowledge reality while maintaining hope for the future.

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Protecting the minds,
emotions and spirits of
your people.
APRIL 2020
Tentpeg Consulting Ltd
Jill Garrett
Beyond
Social
Distancing
2018

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During the past three weeks, a highlight for me has been 8pm on Thursday
evening. Neighbours have blown trumpets, banged pans and drums,
clapped and cheered for our front-line workers and then waved and
smiled furiously at one another. Though we have been “socially distant”,
we have been positively contaminated by our mutual gratitude, by our
shared celebration and joy that we are well, and as far as we know, so are
our friends and neighbours.
Infection is the language of pandemic – and as we move into the fifth week of
“lockdown”, with uncertainty about how long these measures will last, I feel strongly
the need for leaders to be realistic, practical and hopefully infectious! Our physical,
mental, emotion and spiritual health are inter-related, and hope, positivity, gratitude,
generosity, negativity, pessimism, and anxiety, like viruses - are infectious too.
Of course, we have legitimate cause to be concerned during this pandemic, and it is
vital to acknowledge the importance of grief, of comfort, of reaching out, connecting
to and weeping with those who are suffering. Yet equally, as leaders we need to give
hope and to care for the totality of our own well-being and that of our people. We and
they are susceptible to non-physical forms of infection and, where we can give
protection, we should and must if we are to come through this strong, determined and
ready to move on.
The infectious nature of our words, moods and behaviour.
We are wired with “mirror neurons” that cause us to mimic the behaviour of others. A
negative, anxious politician, newsreader, co-worker, family member or acquaintance
can all influence our moods and our behaviour, and of course we can pass that on to
family and co-workers and so we infect others. Thus, the spiral of infection increases
out of control. Research also shows that the mood of leaders has a disproportionate
effect on the mood, (and hence the behaviours), of others. “Putting your own oxygen
mask on first”, is important advice for leaders to heed in the current situation.

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Minimising negative emotional contagion and maximising hopeful and positive
emotional infection is a key responsibility of leadership; it has rarely been more
relevant and important for us to shoulder this responsibility than it is right now. The
fact that people are working in isolation in uncertain circumstances with lack of clarity
about the future and limits over what they can control, makes them more susceptible
to infection than usual and so leaders have a duty to be more intentional than ever.
The good news is that we can take action. Recognising what causes us both to
“spread” and to “catch” the emotions of others helps us to do something about it.
Oprah Winfrey’s advice is to “Surround yourself with those who only lift you higher”,
and this is good advice to take in this season.
Some practical things we can do to offer holistic protection to
others.
Recognise the people, situations and events that cause you anxiety and be aware of
the situations and people where you can be an anxiety giver. Also recognise those who
lift you, who give you hope, encouragement and energy. The following are ideas that
may be helpful ….
➢ News rounds
When the 6 a.m. news broadcast this morning informed me that, should I
contract Covid-19, my age means that my chances of being put on a ventilator
are “border line”, it was not the greatest start to a working day! However, by
8.30 had I put my armour on! I had meditated, spent 45 minutes on the
treadmill, had some coffee and I was ready to start work.
Be aware of the way in which the news impacts your mood and take action to
manage this. I avoid untrustworthy news sources and encourage others to check
their source before they circulate “news”. During the pandemic I have learned
that as the weight of grief and tragedy is so enormous, I don’t listen to the news
after 7pm because I need peace of mind if I am going to sleep well.

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I intentionally exercise more than my usual hour a day, and I intentionally
meditate and pray for longer than usual. The fact that I don’t need to travel gives
me extra time to do both.
What is your “daily armour”? What are the activities, who are the people who
provide you with the protection and energy you need to keep moving forward?
➢ Knowing who gives you energy and who is your Kryptonite
I have a friend Catherine who is like a bottle of coke that has been shaken. She is
bubbly, positive and great fun to be with. Catherine is a wonderful energy giver.
I have other friends who fall into this category, Gavin, Sally, Judy – are all energy
boosters. I know who to call to lift my mood and my spirits. Know and note your
energy givers!
Equally we all know those who are to our energy and positivity what Kryptonite
was to Superman. Even the sight of an email from them can cast a cloud over
the day. Again, know who they are and manage your interactions with them.
Then know who your helpers and comforters are; Sara, Linda, Nola, Elaine and
Lorraine – are just some of mine. These are the people I go to when I need to
hear caring common sense and when I need help to get through a tough
situation.
There are more categories of course but knowing who to reach out to when, and
where you need to manage and minimise contact, is vital to maintain high spirits
and your social and emotional well-being. Research into social well-being has
indicated that we need to spend about four hours a day with people whose
company we enjoy. This awareness and the need to manage our interactions
has never been more important than it is now.
➢ Taking care of how we communicate
When people are working remotely and having to contend with all sorts of life as
well as work challenges it is very easy to miscommunicate, even when intentions

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are entirely good. A misconstrued email from a leader can be especially
distressing and can cast blight over a whole day for a team member. Where you
can, make a phone call; it is often quicker and avoids a string of emails for
clarification. If it is a key email that will be widely circulated, have someone else
read it first to make sure the tone cannot be easily misconstrued. Do let your
team know that you would never intentionally send emails that will be harsh or
discouraging without talking to them first and if they have any concerns about
tone or intent, they should contact you and they should never, never worry
alone.
Read messages out aloud before you send them; that helps you to check the
tone and if there is any doubt about your intended emotion, change the words
or, if you can’t find the right words, try an emoji to indicate the emotions you
wish to convey.
I am dreadful at not seeing typos until I have pressed send! I know that this can
give the impression that I am rushed or panicking and as a leader that is not
what people want or need from me now. If, like me, you don’t see the mistakes
until too late, do get someone else to proof your work.
In coaching – I am finding that I prefer video calls to phone calls and this goes for
teams’ meetings too. 70% of our communication is non-verbal. Working
remotely strips this away so clarifying our words and our intentions is more
important than ever.
Be aware of the “good news” bringers in your team and where an upbeat
message is what you need to convey, intentionally start and end meetings with
their hopeful and optimistic voices ringing in the ears of others.
Positive actions we can take to remain emotionally, spiritually and
mentally healthier during the pandemic.
Mark Greene from the London Institute for Contemporary Christianity has often said,
“We are more like peaches than oranges”. What he means is that we cannot be
divided into segments. We are holistic beings and our physical, mental, emotional,

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social and spiritual health are intrinsically inter- connected. Below I touch on a few of
the positive things we can do for ourselves. These help us to be better prepared to
encourage and give hope to those we serve and care for, as we strive to come through
the pandemic stronger and more holistic and hope-filled in our humanity.
➢ Physical Exercise
Much has been written about the importance of physical well-being to our
overall well-being. I have never seen as many bike riders, dog walkers and
runners in the Warwickshire countryside as I see currently. I am so grateful that
the UK “lockdown”, has given the freedom to go outdoors for physical exercise!
Chemicals vital for our well-being, for our brains, emotions and spirits are
released when we exercise. I am hopeful that the increases I observe in rates of
physical exercise are real and that these continue after the pandemic. Leaders
should encourage this in their people.
➢ Meditation, Prayer & Mindfulness
MRI scans show that mediation, contemplative prayer and mindfulness all
change the frontal lobes of the neuro-cortex and this lowers depression, anxiety,
and stress and helps us to manage our thoughts and behaviour more effectively.
This enables us to have the presence of mind to respond skillfully to challenges,
rather than being out of control or reacting based on intense emotions. Equally
it provides us with the control to catch ourselves and manage negative, hopeless
or destructive thought patterns that could be infectious and damage others.
These practices are common across almost every spiritual tradition and many
secular philosophies incorporate elements of them too. Adopting these practices
does not need you to be a person of faith and neither does it require you to
adopt new religious faith nor to give up a faith that you have.
After my 6.am. news shock today – 30 minutes of Christian meditation and
prayer was a game changer. If you have doubts, read the research on neuro-
theology or talk to friends who regularly practice meditation, mindfulness and
prayer.

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➢ Being Hopeful, Kind & Showing Gratitude
Whilst these are tough and anxious times, we can choose kindness and to see
the best in others. Choosing to be kind and positive with our words and our
thoughts, brings benefit to others and of course, the people who benefit most
from hopefulness, kindness and positivity are those who are being hopeful, kind
and positive! Research has shown that when we say something that is positive
and genuine to another person, it releases “dopamine” into their brain and thus
boosts and energises them. The same research shows that when someone says
something genuine and positive to someone else, more than twice as much
dopamine is released into the brain of the praise and recognition giver. In the
economy of kindness and gratitude, we benefit from what we give away!
➢ Boosting our Spiritual Wellbeing
Showing generosity, making a difference and finding meaning in what we do
boosts our spiritual well-being. The “lockdown” has re-enforced the recognition
that we are all part of something bigger than ourselves: responses to calls for
volunteers, to social distancing measures and even to the 8pm on Thursday
celebrations of front-line heroes, raises our spirits. Humans are spiritual beings:
our body chemistry is such that we are made to make a positive difference to
others
Employee Engagement data has shown that up to 72% of an organisation’s
engagement can be lost if people do not believe that their organisation makes a
positive difference to the lives of those they serve. Leaders need to know and to
broadcast stories about the way in which individuals have helped colleagues or
customers. These are good news stories that we all need to hear; we want our
spirits raised and there has rarely been a time when followers need their leaders
to do this more than they do now.
➢ Facing Reality & Being Hopeful
These are very, very difficult times like no other I have known in my lifetime.
We must be real about the fact that people are rightly fearful. Some of the
people you lead may have lost loved ones in tragic circumstances, some may be
concerned about the exposure of their loved ones to this terrible virus and
others distraught about their livelihoods, their futures and those of their families

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and friends. Leaders must do all they can to reach out to and support the
broken hearted, to bring some comfort to those who are grieving and distressed,
and yet to hold the dual tension of facing what is awful with a message of hope
and optimism for the future.
In his book, “Good to Great”, Jim Collins made famous “The Stockdale Paradox”,
named after James Stockdale, U.S. naval officer and Vietnam prisoner of war.
Stockdale observed that those who survived longest in the prison camps were
those who embraced this dualism, who faced the brutality of the situation they
were in, yet never gave up hope that there was a better future and that they
would be part of this. Collins said leaders, “must never confuse faith that you
will prevail in the end, (which you can never afford to lose), with the discipline to
confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be”.
As we equip ourselves and our people to protect our minds, emotions, spirits
and bodies, we do this in the knowledge that though these are probably the
toughest times our generation has to confront, we do this with a hope and with
optimism about our people and our future.
Bringing positively infectious leadership and hope for the future
Currently, I hear people talking about their hopes for a “New Normal”, about increased
neighbourliness, about a greater sense of community in their work and home places,
about positive impact on the environment and about re-thinking values. And, I also
hear those who pour cold water on these ideas, who focus only on negative aspects of
the pandemic, on those who are selfish, who fight over toilet paper, ignore social
distancing and who magnify the bleak future they believe we all face.
People have long memories: my son-in law supports Liverpool F.C. He has never and
probably will never buy a copy of the Sun newspaper: in Liverpool, the Sun is still
judged on its bleak condemnation of LFC supporters at Hillsborough in 1989. We will
come through this, and when we do it is likely that leaders will be scrutinised by their
stakeholders, their customers, team members, peers and others. They will scrutinise
their motives and behaviour during the pandemic and I believe that those who have
been judged to be others-centered, will come through this stronger than those who
are judged to have put their own needs first. Those who made their people redundant

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one day and then “furloughed” them the next will never be held in the same regard as
those who tried furlough as the first step.
As we continue the journey through this pandemic, as leaders we need to be mindful
of the responsibilities we have to embrace reality and to give hope, to support our
people to be real and to be hopeful, to be practically equipped to live in very difficult
times, yet to be infectiously hopeful and positive about the future.
I look forward to the 8pm Thursday evening clap and, in addition to our
NHS staff, our carers and all those “on the front line”, I will remember
those who are believing the best and bringing positive infection and hope
for the future, to our communities.