Some typical coherence/logic problems in Introduction, and how to fix them.

1. Writing your introduction
Prof. Dr. Ron Martinez
PRPPG7000 - Academic Writing in English

2. Syllabus outline
• 15/08 - Introduction
• 22/08 - IMRaD, Most common errors,
electronic tools
• 29/08 - Strategic planning for your article:
CARS and other approaches
• 05/09 - Title, Abstract e Introduction
• 12/09 - Writing your Introduction
• 19/09 - Coherence, cohesion and clarity, and
use of authorial voice
• 26/09 - (Introduction due) The Results
section
• 03/10- The Discussion section
• 10/10 - Discussing and Concluding
• 17/10 - Writing (no class)
• 24/10 - Students exchange articles (no class)
• 31/10 - (peer feedback due) Plagiarism, the
submission process
• 07/11 - Special guest speaker on journal
trends

3. Today...
• your Introduction writing process
• importance of “They Say/I Say” in shaping the Introduction
• typical problems in the Introduction
• peer feedback

6. From a student (“Albert”)
“O mentor text está sendo o principal recurso, seguido do Google
Tradutor. Ainda estou transitando entre escrever em português e
traduzir, e escrever diretamente em inglês. Está sendo uma tarefa
difícil organizar as ideias em forma de texto. Ainda estou insatisfeito
com as linhas escritas. Por ora, preferi não envolver o orientador.”

7. From a student (“Albert”)
“O mentor text está sendo o principal recurso, seguido do Google
Tradutor. Ainda estou transitando entre escrever em português e
traduzir, e escrever diretamente em inglês. Está sendo uma tarefa
difícil organizar as ideias em forma de texto. Ainda estou insatisfeito
com as linhas escritas. Por ora, preferi não envolver o orientador.”

8. From “Linda”
“Escolhi tentar escrever meu artigo em inglês e descobri que tenho
mais dificuldade do que eu imaginava com a escrita na língua. No
momento, estou me perguntando se devo mesmo escrever o artigo em
inglês. Utilizei o "texto mentor", o Google Translate, o site "Skell" e o
site "Linguee". Terei reunião com minha orientadora amanhã para
conversar a respeito do artigo.”

9. From “Natalie”
“A experiência está sendo bastante positiva. Estou aplicando o método
CARS e Problema-Solução. Além disso, como orientado pelo professor
na aula anterior, estou utilizando modelos de trabalhos no assunto em
questão para utilizar as expressões mais comuns. Estou ficando
satisfeita com o resultado apesar de ainda estar no início dessa etapa.
E o envolvimento com o orientador está sendo satisfatório, com muita
troca de experiência, principalmente do orientador.”

10. From “Iara”
“As I don't have results yet, just a research proposal, I'm still on the
early steps of writing the Introduction of my paper. The hardest part, I
think, is to decide how to "sell" this story, and make it interesting for the
reviewers.”

14. "They Say, I Say"
• "(A) writer needs to indicate not only
what his or her thesis is, but also what
larger conversation that thesis is
responding to." (p. 20)
• "(W)hen is comes to constructing an
argument […], remember that you are
entering a conversation and therefore
need to start with 'what others are
saying'…" (p. 20)

21. “THEY SAY”

22. “THEY SAY”
“I SAY”

23. INTRODUCTION

27. Good introduction?
Much was written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

28. Good introduction?
Much was written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

29. Good introduction?
Much was written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

30. Good introduction?
Much was written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

31. Much was written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

32. Much has been written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

33. Much has been written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts were made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend to
contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

34. Much has been written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts have been made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend
to contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

35. Much has been written on interaction in electroacoustic mixed works. Several
analytical strategies have been published, such as Menezes (2002),
Bachratá(2012), O'Callaghan; Eigenfeldt (2010), as well as on the techniques
(CAMPOS 2005; ROWE, 1993), and on aesthetics aspects (BREIBJBERG, 2011;
GARNETT, 2001, ROWE, 1999) of this kind of interaction. However, until now,
few efforts have been made to relate these actions. In this research, we intend
to contribute with some of this proposes in order to delineate aspects of the
interaction in this repertoire. Our attention will be in aesthetics issues, but, for
this, we will also refer to the mentioned fields.

36. I live in Curitiba., where it
rains a lot.
I have many umbrellas.

38. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

39. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data.Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

40. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data.Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

41. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data.Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

42. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

43. Be careful with “extraneous
information” in your Introduction!

45. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

46. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

47. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

48. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data.Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

49. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

50. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data.Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research.A
comparison between the existing software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each
software and the best application for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity,
accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction
between the software and the user and what are the purposes of each software. Mainly the plotted
networks and the results given by each software will be analyzed, showing what each one shows or
does not show and its best application.

51. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit your research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help something in your research. Many
who enter bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a
larger learning curve most of the timeA comparison between the existing software will be done
demonstrating the ups and downs of each software and the best application for each one, verifying
the attributes such as speed, complexity, accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will
also be analyzed, how the interaction between the software and the user and what are the purposes
of each software. ...

52. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit their research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help at all in their research. Many who
enter bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the timeA comparison between the existing software will be done
demonstrating the ups and downs of each software and the best application for each one, verifying
the attributes such as speed, complexity, accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The interfaces will
also be analyzed, how the interaction between the software and the user and what are the purposes
of each software. ...

53. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit their research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help at all in their research. After all,
many who enter bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science,and this
leads to a larger learning curve most of the timeA comparison between the existing software will be
done demonstrating the ups and downs of each software and the best application for each one,
verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity, accuracy, ergonomics, among others. The
interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction between the software and the user and what are
the purposes of each software. ...

54. In biology we have a lot of data to analyze and bioinformatics has emerged to aid in the analysis of
large amounts of data. Some of the forms used today are graphical representations of biological
networks, so it is possible to make a more efficient analysis of certain data. Many tools have already
been produced in order to provide better visualization and understanding of the data. Many who enter
bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science, this leads to a larger
learning curve most of the time and although there are several software to aid in research and
analysis, people do not always know the which is better or which is going to fit their research better,
and sometimes do not even know if using the software will help at all in their research. After all,
many who enter bioinformatics have only one side of training, biology or computer science,and this
leads to a larger learning curve most of the time Therefore, a comparison between the existing
software will be done demonstrating the ups and downs of each software and the best application
for each one, verifying the attributes such as speed, complexity, accuracy, ergonomics, among
others. The interfaces will also be analyzed, how the interaction between the software and the user
and what are the purposes of each software. ...

56. 1) Identify problems. 2) How to improve?
There were three little pigs, of different ages. There was a wolf nearby.
They needed to build a home. The first pig decided to build a house of
straw. The second built a house of sticks. Its name was Porky. The
third pig took longer to build his house. His house was made of bricks.
Bricks are a more expensive material. A hungry wolf came to eat the
pigs. The pigs hid inside their homes. The wolf easily blew down the
first house. It took longer to blow down the second house, but the wolf
did it. The third house was made of bricks. It was impossible to blow
down.

57. Now talk about your Introduction
1. If you have a printed Introduction today…
a. First talk about your research to your partner/group
b. Then ask for feedback (e.g. identifiable CARS)
2. If you don’t have a printed Introduction today…
a. Talk about how you are currently “conceptualizing” your Introduction
b. Give feedback to others
3. If you are in the “virtual” group, and you are alone…
i. Re-read your Introduction considering today’s points

58. On our site...
1. Download an Introduction (choose Portuguese or English).
2. Identify any problems (for example, extraneous information).
3. Try to “fix” the problems. Consult with another person.

59. Homework
• Task on Go Formative
• Write, write, write!