Befriending involves creating a professional relationship between a trained volunteer and a lonely individual to reduce isolation. While friendly, befriending differs from friendship through structured boundaries. The focus is developing the relationship through open communication and empathy to benefit both parties. Befriending aims to improve well-being rather than solve problems or act as emergency support. Intergenerational models can benefit youth and seniors by sharing skills across generations.

1. Intergenerational
Befriending
4th March 2015

2. “Befriending is a relationship
between a trained volunteer
and an isolated or lonely
individual (befriendee), which
is initiated, supported and
monitored by a voluntary or
statutory agency”
Definition of befriending

3. Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)
1. Just like friendship
2. A way to provide respite for the befriendee’s
carer
3. Focused mainly on building a good relationship
between the befriender and the befriendee
4. Giving advice to befriendees about lifestyle and
behaviour

4. Befriending and friendship
Befriending involves
creating and maintaining a
personal relationship, so
there are obviously
elements of friendship
present in a befriending
relationship.

5. Befriending and friendship
However, there are
important differences. Whilst
friendly, it is a professional
relationship governed by
boundaries and carried out
in line with the outcomes of
the supervising organisation.

6. It’s all about the relationship
The relationship itself is the
main focus of a befriending
relationship. This is why good
communication skills and an
open, empathic attitude are
the most important
characteristics of a befriender.

7. Giving advice
Befrienders and
coordinators of
befriending services
often provide useful
information about
health and lifestyle to
befriendees if
requested.

8. Giving advice
However, this is very different
from giving advice and it is not
part of the befriender’s role to
give advice about any aspect of
lifestyle or behaviour even if
they are an expert in that field
in their professional life.

9. Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)
5. Focused on supporting the befriendee to reach
certain goals
6. The key to solving all the befriendee’s problems
7. Giving help with practical tasks and problems
8. About the befriender as much as about the
befriendee

10. Befriending and goals
Befriending is about the
relationship and the quality of
the time spent together. Many
personal goals may be achieved
as a result of the increased
confidence and wellbeing
which this relationship brings …

11. Befriending and goals
… and befrienders can be
instrumental in supporting
befriendees to resolve
practical issues, BUT these
are all essentially a by-
product of the relationship
itself.

12. The scope of befriending
Befriending can have a powerful
positive impact on the life of an
isolated or lonely person, but it is
important not to make promises
which are either too wide or too
specific to be realistically fulfilled.

13. Befriending and the befriender
It is essential that the
relationship is right for the
befriender too. Coordinators
need to check in regularly with
befrienders to make sure they’re
happy with how things are
going.

14. Befriending is … (yes / no / maybe)
9. An informal way of providing counselling or
therapy
10. Providing a relationship that others in the
client’s life can not
11. Something a befriendee can turn to in an
emergency
12. Something which essentially only involves two
people – the befriender and the befriendee

15. Befriending is unique
Befriending services work
with people who lack
meaningful informal social
relationships. The essential
support they provide is
usually not available to
befriendees in any other
form.

16. Not an emergency service
Befriending is a long-term,
preventative intervention.
Though befrienders need to be
trained on how to respond
should an emergency arise while
they are with their befriender ….

17. Not an emergency service
… organisations must
make it clear to
befriendees and
befrienders alike that
befrienders are not
there to be called upon I
an emergency.

18. Models of befriending delivery
Face-to-face:
1:1
Groups
Distance:
Telephone
Email / letter
Intergenerational Projects:
Residential setting
Befrienders in groups
???
The future of befriending is
waiting to be written!
Delivery models

19. WELLBEING

20. WELLBEING
Starting Up
• Location, Location, Location
• Appropriate time to run sessions
• Staff time
• Volunteer Supervisor
• Abilities

21. WELLBEING
Recruiting young people
• Good contact within
school
• Talking at assembly
or in class
• School magazine
• Posters

22. WELLBEING
Training
• Perceptions
• Confidentiality
• Boundaries
• Dementia
• Dilemmas

23. WELLBEING
1st Session
Getting to know each
other: Badge Making
• Interests
• Skills
• Abilities

24. WELLBEING
The aim is never the activity but always a smile!
• Talking
• Listening
• Laughing
• Touch

25. WELLBEING
Planning a programme
• Use peoples interests
• Use peoples skills and talents
• Alter activities depending on group

26. WELLBEING
Project Evaluation
• After every session
• After every block
/term
• Quotes

27. WELLBEING
Activities
• Seasonal
• Themed
• Using every sense

28. WELLBEING
Benefits
• Residents
• Young people
• Staff
• Families

29. WELLBEING

30. WELLBEING

31. WELLBEING

32. WELLBEING

33. WELLBEING

34. WELLBEING

35. WELLBEING

36. WELLBEING

37. The benefits of befriending
Increased confidence and
self-esteem
Increased involvement with
communities
More able to manage
challenges of everyday life

38. The benefits of befriending
More cohesive and integrated
communities communities
Less pressure on health and social
care services
Reductions in rates of crime,
homelessness, substance abuse
and suicide

39. The benefits of intergenerational befriending
Greater communication and understanding between young
and old
Befrienders learn skills from past they have no other way of
learning about. They impart ‘modern’ skills which will be
useful to the befriendee
Befriendees enjoy knowing that their skills and knowledge are
appreciated. They gain practical knowledge of of new skills

40. Discussion questions
 What might be the benefits to your client group of developing an
intergenerational befriending project?
 What do you think would be the main challenges facing your
organisation in developing an intergenerational project? What
resources would you need to overcome them?
 What three actions could you take in the next month towards the
development of an intergenerational befriending project?

41. Intergenerational Befriending
www.befriending.co.uk
www.strive.me.uk