Eaquals Prague 2018

1. SUSTAINABLE CONFLICT
Dr Yseult Freeney
Associate Professor Organisational Psychology
WORKSHOP 28 April 2018
yseult.freeney@dcu.ie
©Eaquals Eaquals International Conference | Prague | 26-28 April 2018 #eaquals18prague

2. CONFLICT IN AN ORGANISATION IS DISRUPTIVE
AND SHOULD BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS
STRONGLY NEUTRAL STRONGLY
DISAGREE AGREE

3. Group Influences on
Individual‘s Behaviour
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgRo
iTWkBHU

4. Group Norms
Unwritten rules that guide group
behavior and define what is good
behavior and what is bad behavior
Norms of self-managed teams will
control member behavior more than
organizational rules
Team norms have more impact on the
ethical behavior of its members than does
a supervisor
• Norms will determine whether the group is
effective/ineffective and whether member behavior supports
or does not support organizational goals

5. Why Norms?
• Each team needs to develop a set of
operating norms or ground rules.
• Effective groups have a set of norms
that govern individual behavior during
team meetings, facilitate the work of
the group, and enable the group to
accomplish its task.

6. Two types of influence
• Informational Influence where the other people
in the group provide a source of information in a
case of ambiguity and uncertainty (Sherif)-
Generally results in private acceptance of the
conformed decision.
• Normative Influence where there is little
ambiguity (Asch) group norms and a strong
social pressure not to be deviant persuade
people to conform. Generaly results in public
conformity without the private acceptance.

7. Infamous Studies
• Sherif: Autokinetic Effect
• Asch: Line Comparison

8. Comparison of lines

10. Team Conflict
Underlying processes

11. Discuss
• What are your experiences of
team conflict?
• What tends to spark conflict?
• How as a leader do you typically
manage it?

12. Conflict in organisations
• Conflict is inevitable, usually occurring
when one party perceives that their
interests are being opposed or
negatively affected by another party.
• Conflict can produce either a positive
or negative outcome.
• Evidence that conflict is always
detrimental (De Dreu, 2008)

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Conflict: Is it ever positive?
• Brings problems into open that have previously
been ignored
• Motivates people to appreciate one another’s
positions more fully
• Encourages people to consider new ideas

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Why conflict has a bad name
• Competitive, win-lose
goals
• Misperception and
bias
• Emotionality
• Decreased
communication
• Blurred issues
• Rigid commitments
• Magnified differences,
minimised similarities
• Escalation of the
conflict

15. Sustainable Conflict is
functional
• Functional conflicts are constructive, support
an organisation’s goals, and contribute to
performance. It generally involves people who
are genuinely interested in solving a problem
and are willing to listen to one another.
• Drives Performance
• Generates new ideas.

16. Devil’s Advocate
In accordance with this practice, devil’s advocacy in today’s
organizations involves assigning someone the role of critic.
Irving Janis recommends the devil’s advocate role for
preventing groupthink.

17. Dialectic method
Involves facilitating a structured debate of opposing views prior to
making a decision. By hearing the pros and cons of all the different
ideas, greater success in making sound decisions. However, it should
be noted that a drawback of this method is that the emphasis to win a
debate often clouds the issue at hand.

19. Hi
Low
Concern for other party’s outcome
Low Hi
Concern
for own
outcomes
Accommodation
Yielding
Avoidance
Inaction
Competition
Contending
Integration
Problem solving
Compromise
Conflict resolution styles

20. What style are you?
Questionnaire Time

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Dysfunctional Conflict
• Consist of disputes and disagreements that hinder your
company's performance. This generally involves people
who are unwilling to work together to solve a problem
and is often personal.
• There are various methods for dealing with it, including:
• Integrating
• Also known as problem solving and generally involves encouraging
opposing parties to confront an issue and cooperatively identify the
problem, generate alternative solutions and select the most appropriate
solution. Misunderstandings and similar disputes can often be resolved
using this method.
• Obliging
• This occurs when a person neglects their own concern in order to satisfy
the concern of the opposing party. A characteristic of this conflict
management style includes playing down differences while emphasising
on commonalities.

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• Dominating
• People that adopt this approach often have an "I win, you
lose" mentality. Dominating relies on formal authority to force
compliance and is generally appropriate when unpopular but
necessary solutions are implemented.
• Avoiding
• Involves either passive withdrawal from the problem or active
suppression of the issue. Generally appropriate for trivial
issues or when the negative effects of confrontation outweigh
the benefits of resolving the conflict.
• Compromising
• Give-and-take approach for resolving dysfunctional conflicts
and is particularly useful when the parties involved possess
equal power.

23. What style to adopt?
• Reflects a number of forces…
• Preferences of individual
• Prior experience
• Time constraints

24. Preferences of the Individual
Needs
• Need for Power
• Need for Affiliation
• Need for Achievement
What drives you?
• Conflicts can be
exacerbated but failing
to see we come to the
table with different
needs
• Understanding this can
help you to ease the
conflict
©Eaquals Eaquals International Conference, Prague 26-28 April 2018 www.eaquals.org 24

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Why we avoid facing it head on…
• Engaging in dialogue and negotiation around conflict is
something we tend to approach with fear and hesitation, afraid
that the conversation will go worse than the conflict has gone
thus far. All too often, we talk ourselves out of potential dialogue
• We find it stressful
• In addition, if we have history with the individuals involved in this
conflict (i.e., we've tried to negotiate with them in the past,
without success), it will "filter" our perceptions of this situation
and make us reluctant to negotiate.

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Why we avoid facing it head on…
• Consider that our society tends to reward alternative responses to
conflict, rather than negotiation:
• People who aggressively pursue their needs, competing rather than
collaborating, are often satisfied by others who prefer to
accommodate.
• Managers and leaders are often rewarded for their aggressive,
controlling approaches to problems, rather than taking a more
compassionate approach to issues that may seem less decisive to
the public or their staffs.
• Negotiation requires profound courage on the part of all parties: It
takes courage to honestly and clearly articulate your needs, and it
takes courage to sit down and listen to your adversaries.

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Sustainable conflict
• Before you develop mediation skills, to intervene in
others’ conflicts, you need to know how to handle
yourself in a conflict…
• Listening is the key to dealing with any upset
colleague.
• After actively listening and taking notes, it’s
important to let the person know that you thank them
for bringing the situation to your attention and that
you will investigate it.

28. Builders
• Approach individual with
respect & expect respect.
• Project confidence by
sitting next to or across
from the other individual
• Remain calm, friendly, and
professional always
• Maintain eye contact.
• Be willing to listen and
keep an open mind.
• Make every effort to
understand the person’s
complaint or concern.
• Emphasize all positives 1st
• Exercise empathy and
reiterate your concern for
the student/issue at hand
• Address specific concerns
and remain focused on what
is best for the school
• Share something that
supports your concerns:
EVIDENCE
• Offer explicit help & advice.
• Stand firm on org policies.
• End meetings on a positive
note and say thank you

29. Breakers
• Never sit behind your desk.
• Avoid crossing your arms in front
of you or placing your hands on
your hips.
• Do not argue or interrupt.
• Do not accuse; state honestly what
you feel using "I" statements.
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30. Characteristics of
Assertiveness
• Controlled use of energy
• Calm and assured manner
• Makes clear statements
• Shows respect
• Is consistent and persistent
• Broken Record: repeat same message over and over
if necessary
• Listens attentively
• Is open and honest
• Converts win-lose to win-win
• Puts ‘I’ at the heart of the discussion
• Fogging (agreement)

31. Remember… Your Rights
• To say ‘No’
• To make mistakes
• To consider your needs important
• To express your feelings in an
appropriate way without violating
anybody else’s rights
• To take responsibility for your actions
• To respect yourself
• To set your own priorities
• To be assertive without feeling guilty

32. Practice these phrases
• I believe that I understand your position on this
• I appreciate your concerns
• However, I would prefer to have more time to digest this
• I need to think about that
• I suggest we meet at x time on x date
• I think it would be far more beneficial to discuss this
further when we have both had time to reflect on the
matter
• I will review the options and we can explore these further
then (only if you think there may be a win-win negotiation
possible)
• FINALLY, just to clarify, I understand that you are
concerned about xxx. Let us discuss this further on xxx
• What do all of these phrases have in common?

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Empathy
• Perspective taking: seeing the world through the
other negotiator’s eyes
• Non-judgmental expression of the other’s
viewpoint (open to correction)

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Do not agree if you disagree
• Beware of suggestive questions while
actively listening (“Don’t you think that’s
right?”)
• Do not agree if you disagree
• Empathy does not mean agreement
• “I am just trying to understand your
underlying interests. I have a perspective of
my own, but let’s wait on that.”

35. Role Play Exercise
• Think about a conversation you’ve
been dreading…
• Do you and the other person have
different motives?
• Use the assertiveness phrases to
rehearse the conversation

36. Summary
• Conflict is not always bad, it can be healthy
• Normative cultures can be stifling and toxic
• Sustainable conflict is achieved through
opportunities for functional conflict
• Self-awareness in conflict situations is key
• Communication skills are critical:
• assertiveness, listening, empathy and honesty
©Eaquals #eaquals18prague

37. Body Language…
• Steady breathing
• Eye contact
• Facial expression should be congruent with
emotions (don’t smile when you are angry!)
• Open gestures and avoid crossing arms
• Posture should be upright but not stiff

38. Be a role model for your
team…
• Keep it clear and simple
• State what you want
• Offer positive solutions
• Clarify tasks
• Look for bottled up emotions
• Workable compromise
• Ideal outcome
• Realistic outcome
• Fallback outcome

39. How to be effectively
assertive
• A confident, quiet, caring tone usually works best.
• Eye contact, especially the kind that conveys interest and attention to
the other person, can help you create that sense of “connection”. Stand
if they’re standing.
• Respect the toxic person and always expect respect in return. Settle for
nothing less.
• Remain calm. A calm cool response to an angry verbal barrage can
neutralize a toxic experience.
• Listen attentively. Don't argue or interrupt, just listen.
• Selective silence is one of the most effective ways of dealing with
difficult people. It is easy to use, and very low threat. When people are
being difficult, they are often seeking attention and power. When you
respond verbally to their toxic attack you are giving them attention and
power they desire. When you use selective silence you deny them both
attention and power.

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Assertiveness
• Advocacy of one’s own perspective
• Identifying one’s interests
• Explaining them clearly
• Confidence to touch sensitive matters

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Assertiveness Loop
• Explain your story
• Check the other side’s understanding of your story
• Do not assume that that a nodding head or “yes,
yes” indicates true understanding
• Ask the other side to share his or her version of your
story
• Correct any misunderstandings