When we talk about work-life balance, we all struggle with balancing work and the rest of our responsibilities. When work crowds out everything else, we find ourselves unfulfilled, overwhelmed, or stagnant because we’re sacrificing growth in other areas. We feel disconnected from people who matter to us It’s not easy to fit in everything that’s important, and all too often, we view the problem as a set of trade-offs So this guide helps in understanding that how we can be productive and create balance in all the four domains of life which are Work, Life, Community, and Self.

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How To Be
a Better Leader
With a Richer Life

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Work VS Life
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It doesn’t have to be this way.
• We all struggle with balancing work and the rest of our responsibilities.
• When work crowds out everything else, we find ourselves unfulfilled, overwhelmed,
or stagnant because we’re sacrificing growth in other areas.
• We feel disconnected from people who matter to us
• It’s not easy to fit in everything that’s important, and all too often, we view the
problem as a set of trade-offs.

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Life Is Not a Zero-Sum Game
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Strive for excellence in all domains.
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Work Family Community Self
• Don’t assume life to be a zero-sum game.
• Apply leadership talents in ways that benefit all domains of life: work, family,
community, and self.
• Pursue excellence in all these areas simultaneously to become stronger.
• From this balance everyone benefits: your employer, your family, your
community, and yourself.

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Measure
Total Leadership Process
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Clarify Experiment
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Identify
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• Achieving wins for work, family, community, and self involves what Friedman calls
the Total Leadership process.
• You start by clarifying what’s important and who matters in each domain of your life.
• Next, you conduct small experiments to test changes you could make to achieve
your goals.
• And then you continually adapt: Kill the experiments that aren’t working, and build
on the ones that are.

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Priorities
What’s Important
to You?
Actual Time Spent
• You start by identifying your core values and vision—and reflecting on how your
current actions match up.
• Consider how important the four domains are and assign a percentage to each.
• Then see how much time and energy you spend on each domain in a week.
• Determine adjustments needed and how those would improve your
performance in all four domains.

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Who Matters to You?
• Next, identify the most important people in your life and map out expectations.
• Have candid conversations with each person who matters to you.
• You’ll find that what people actually need from you is less burdensome than what
you thought
• Now you have a firmer grounding in what’s most important and a complete picture of
your inner circle and are ready to start experimenting.

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Designing and Conducting
Experiments
• To make meaningful improvements in all four domains, you need to design
smart experiments.
• There are four steps: Set goals, identify possibilities, take action, and adapt.
• This process doesn’t require taking big risks. It works because it entails
realistic expectations, short-term changes that are in your control, and the
explicit support of those around you.

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Set Goals
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• The first step is to set your goals.
• In the work domain, goals typically fall into three buckets: increasing
productivity, reducing costs, and improving work environment.

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Set Goals
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Goals for home and community involve strengthening relationships and
contributing more to society.

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Set Goals
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For the self, it’s usually about improving your health and finding a
higher purpose.

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Running Her Way to a Four-Way Win
• For instance, one participant in the Wharton program decided to run a half-marathon.
• It was sponsored by her company and benefited a charity she cared deeply about.
• She encouraged her kids to fund–raise and run the race with her.
• In doing so, she hit all four domains: work, family, community, and self.
• Achieving “four-way wins” like this is what makes changes sustainable.

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Identify Possibilities
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• Next, come up with a slate of possible experiments that would help you achieve your goals.
• Most experiments will fall into several common categories.
• One is where and when work gets done.
• You might try working at the local library one day a week, for example, to avoid the hassles of
commuting, and making time for outside interests.
• Other experiments involve venturing out of your comfort zone.

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Make Your Experiment a Stretch
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• Whatever type of experiment you choose, make sure it’s something of a stretch:
not too easy, but not too daunting.
• Forget about how others might perceive the change. What seems like a baby
step to you might feel like a giant leap to me, and vice versa.
• What’s critical is that you see it as the right challenge.

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Choose Where to Take Action
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• When you’re brainstorming for possible experiments, let your imagination run free.
• But when it’s time to take action, try no more than three experiments at once.
• Narrow your list to the three most promising candidates.
• Which ones will:
•Allow you to practice key leadership skills?
•Give you the best return on your investment?
•Move you furthest toward your vision of how you want to lead your life?

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Adapt as You Go
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• Once you begin your experiments, however, don’t become too wedded to your plan.
• At some point, you’ll need to adapt to the unexpected.
• And remember, all effective experiments question traditional assumptions about how
things get done.
• For example, conversations about work/life balance tend to emphasize segmentation,
shutting out the office when you’re with your family, and vice versa.
• Sometimes, it is better to blur the boundaries between domains even more.
• You might join a book group or health club with some coworkers or use the same
calendar for work and home activities.

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Measure Progress
• The only way to fail with an experiment is not to learn from it.
• The final step in the Total Leadership process is to track your progress. You can use all
kinds of metrics, such as cost savings from reduced travel or hours spent volunteering at a
teen center.
• Metrics can be qualitative or quantitative.
• They can be self-reported or reported by others.

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Becoming Healthier and Increasing Energy
• To figure out how to measure, it helps to consider what time frame will allow you to
accurately document what you did.
• For example: If you were to go on a fitness regime to increase energy and performance, food
intake would be an important metric. Would you remember what you ate if you didn’t record it
daily?

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Ken’s Experiment
So how does the process really work?
Let’s look in depth at an experiment conducted by one of the Wharton
participants.
We’ll call him Ken.

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Join a Nonprofit Board
• Ken decided to join the board of a nonprofit organization to improve his
performance and satisfaction in all four domains of his life.
• He created a scorecard to monitor how he was doing.

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Ken’s Goals
• Ken carefully reflected on how joining a nonprofit board would benefit each domain in his life.
• On the work front, he hoped to become a CEO—and to do that, he’d need to gain new skills,
expand his network, and learn from more-seasoned professionals.
• At home, he was looking for a meaningful activity to do with his fiancée and a way to build
common ground with his sister.
• The satisfaction that he hoped to gain by helping others and getting involved fell
squarely in the “community” and “self” domains.

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Ken’s Metrics
• Next, Ken looked for measures that he could use to determine whether his
experiment was successful.
• He came up with metrics such as “number of board meetings attended” and
“project time spent with fiancée” to gauge improvements in his skills and
relationships.

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Ken’s Steps
• When Ken was ready to take action, he set up meetings with people from all areas
of his life to align his interests with theirs.
• He researched board opportunities and developed some foundational skills in
nonprofit management.
• Then he dove in.
• Three years later he reported that he was on a community board and enjoyed richer
relationships with the people he loved. He was also on the formal succession track
for CEO.

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Be realistic.
Small Steps
for Big Change
• Experiments shouldn’t be massive, all-encompassing shifts in the way you live.
• Overly ambitious changes are generally doomed to fail.
• The best experiments let you try something new while minimizing the risks.
• You start to see results, and others take note, which motivates you to keep going
and builds support from your stakeholders.
• Over time, these small steps add up to big change.

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The Payoff
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Satisfaction increased…
• When you pursue excellence in all four domains simultaneously, the results speak
for themselves.
• In one study, more than 300 businesspeople assessed themselves before and after
Wharton’s Total Leadership program.
• Their satisfaction increased by an average of 20% at work, 28% at home, and 31%
in their community lives.
• They saw the biggest difference in the “self” domain, where satisfaction increased by
39%.

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…and so did performance.
• The participants also reported that their performance improved.
• They felt they were performing better at work, even though they were
spending more of their time on other aspects of their lives.
• Because they were working smarter, they became more focused,
passionate, and committed to what they were doing.

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Integrate All Four Domains
• No matter what stage you’re at in your career, you can be a better leader and
have a richer life—if you are ready and willing to rise to the challenge.
• There are probably more ways to benefit all four domains of your life than you
think.
• You just have to know how to spot them and have the discipline to pursue them.

28. Thank You
*Data taken from HBR.
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